Gemini (21 page)

I peeked back over my shoulder at my shadow that followed a block or so behind.

Cade refused to let me walk alone, insisting I needed protection. We’d been training mercilessly the past few weeks, and though things had been quiet on the Lilith front, Julian and Nate had been in and out with more frequent demon and Fallen breaches at the borders of Aravot.

Cade was convinced it was Lilith trying to wear us down, that she had some epic showdown planned. His suspicions alone kept me within arm’s reach at any given moment, and this walk was the furthest he’d let me be in a month.

Not that I was complaining.

At least he kept out of sight, giving me the illusion of freedom.

Everything was changing.

Summer was coming to an end, and Phoebe was still talking about leaving. Now, more than ever, I needed time to get used to the idea of giving up my best friend and the rest of my life.

I wanted to pretend to be normal for the last bit of my human existence. And this opportunity with Infinity, however limited, was my final salvation.

Next May was graduation. One month before my twenty-second birthday, but I was pretty sure that wasn’t going to happen. I
so
needed some sense of completion. A tour was clearly out of the question, but the possibility of a record deal. Even if I didn't get to do it, I still wanted an offer. I deserved this.

I wasn’t sure how long I could hold this Convergence thing off anymore. Getting this far into the summer had been torture. I used training as an excuse, but I got the feeling I could only hold him off a little while longer until he started making demands.

When it came to my safety, Cade would give no concessions.

Everyone was convinced I’d want this over with. Julian. Raz. They all insisted they knew me, but I wondered if they really knew me at all. At least not the girl I am today.

And now after admitting my truth to Cade weeks ago, that I was falling for him, he refused to sleep in his bed with me either.

I felt like some harlot trying to steal his virtue.

Wasn't it supposed to be him corrupting me? He was a complete gentleman, telling me we had to go slow. It made no sense. I mean, if we had this history together, what was he waiting for? We were supposed to be Gemini. We’d never had sex with anyone else, why was this wrong?

Wait.
Did he sleep with that demon?

Oh damn, did I try to push
that
from my head. Chunks rose to my throat at the possibility. And he would probably never tell, at least not until we made things official.

I was kind of looking forward to this vacay, though. Would it happen this weekend? Our first time? What would that be like?

I got occasional sneak peaks of his body. His firm abs. Broad, tan chest. And let me say.
Yum.
But I wanted more. I was ready for all of it.

Ready to give Cade all of me.

Strong arms wrapped around me, and Cade nuzzled his head into my neck.

“I’m sorry, but I had to get one final embrace before you begin work.” He kissed the top of my head.

I turned around and let him kiss my cheek.

“I’m going to hang with Phoebe.”

Cade pulled me into a hug. “Of course. I’ll see you soon?”

“Definitely” I gave him a quick kiss then went in the back door.

He followed me inside and went to talk to Vince.

Backstage, Phoebe sat at the piano, playing some depressing song and singing beneath her breath. She’d agreed to meet me early so we could practice for tonight’s show.

With Sam Gaits here, everything had to be perfect.

“Hey Phoebs. How’s it going?”

She shrugged and continued playing while I sat on the bench beside her.

Whatever was going on with her and Remie, she’d been tight lipped. I figured it had something to do with her leaving, but I wasn’t sure. There were consequences of me choosing this new life and unfortunately, it also affected her—not just our friendship, but also her relationship with Remie.

Nothing about this was fair. Especially to her.

“What are you playing?”

Phoebe looked up, her eyes were red and swollen.

"Oh Phoebe, no. Please don’t cry.” I put my arm around her and laid my head on her shoulder. “I’m going to fix this. You know that, right?"

She sighed and returned to staring at the keys.

"What can I do? Tell me what to do."

She stopped playing and dropped her head to her hands.

"You've always been strong for me. I won't leave you. I don't care if you want me to or not. You belong with us, whether you're human or not. I swear, I'll fix this."

"Zoe." She lifted her head, yet stared at the keys. "I believe there’s a reason for all this. If Remie's not meant to be part of my life right now, then I have to believe there's something waiting for me someplace else." She wiped the tears from her eyes.

"What do you mean someplace else?" My heart fell into my stomach.

She took a deep breath and returned her hands to the keys. "I’m going home.”

"You can't, Remie needs you." I sucked in a breath. "I need you."

"Things are getting dangerous, and besides, I need to find my own life. It obviously isn't here."

"Stop. This is your life, and we’re your family. We love you."

My hands shook. My blood pumped so hard, the whoosh pulsed in my ears.

"My mom said the trust fund Sophie set up could be used anywhere. You and the rest of them need to focus right now. I’m only in the way."

"You're not in the way. How can I do this without you?"

"You're going to have to figure that out." She stopped plunking on the piano and clasped her hands in her lap.

"What about Remie?"

"I love Remie. But if I stay, I'll only be a distraction."

“But what if he stays here as a Guardian?”

"Raz says it's too dangerous for me, regardless. He's right. And I know Remie. He'd be more concerned with protecting me than the borders, and I won't let him do that. He'd be risking something so much more, and that's not what he was destined for. We obviously have different journeys. And that's okay."

"In what messed up world is that okay?" A knot rose to my throat, and the temperature in my cheeks spiked. "I matched you two. And why would I be allowed to match two people who can't be together? What kind of crap is that?"

"I have to believe that my own fate will be made known when it’s time.”

No way. I was not about to lose my best friend over some guy.

"Why won't you stand up and fight for what you want? How can you just walk away from Remie? From all of us?"

Phoebe glared, her mouth open and eyes wide, waiting for me to let go of my clenched fist.

I blew out a breath, puffing out my cheeks, then relaxed my hands on my knees. "I need you."

I waited for her to respond, but the usual loving Phoebe I’d always known didn’t answer.

"Everything can't always be about you, Zoe."

"Huh?"

"You really can be selfish. Ever since Eli left, everything's been about you. What you need. This club, your plans of touring and recording with Lucci. I mean, seriously. Do you ever think about anyone but yourself?"

My jaw dropped. "Excuse me?" I stood up and gripped my hips.

"So typical," she mumbled under her breath and shook her head.

"I'm right here, Phoebe."

"Good. Then listen closely." She turned toward me. "Daddy pulled some strings and got me into Columbia.”

No.

“I'm going home."

Phoebe got up from the bench and walked out.

Part of me wanted to chase after her, but I couldn’t make my butt move.

She was right.

Ever since Eli left, all I’d focused on was music. This dream. Even when Cade came along and informed me what this sacrifice was about, I still whined about me, about this career I’d never have. Like that was more important than saving an entire race. What the hell was wrong with me?

"Hey." Remie came in. "You okay? Phoebe said she told you her news."

I shook my head. "You're really going to let her go back to New York? Just like that?"

He ran his fingers through his messy, blond hair. "Phoebe’s a tough nut to crack. Despite what you think, though, she's no doormat. She stands up for what she believes, which is what makes her the most amazing soul I've ever known."

"Then please explain to me, how can you let her leave?"

"First of all, she has a choice. And the final decision was hers, not mine. But she's right. I've spent the past few days trying to figure this out. She’s in danger here. And she would never allow me to ignore this duty. We all have our roles to play. And for me to discount that would be more selfish than not letting her go."

"You really believe that?"

"Yeah." He pressed his lips together. "And if you spent more time with Phoebe, you would too." He closed his eyes. "I know this is gonna sound strange." He paused. "But I think a thank you is in order.”

"A what?”

"Deep down, I know somewhere inside of you is Chayah. The woman who has sacrificed many times over so I could be here."

"A lot of good it's done Phoebe."

"I wish you saw what we do. You still think all this is a burden, but it's not. It's this amazing gift you've been given. You know, when I met Phoebe, I was a mess. I’d just lost my parents, and I was alone except for Rainah. I had no idea what direction my life was heading. Then you showed up to my guitar class with all your natural talent and attitude. We clicked just like that, even before I knew you were Genesis. And the minute you introduced me to Phoebe, that was it. My heart recognized her soul immediately. She was the one."

His amber aura lit up the room. I’d never seen him so happy. Or in love.

"So why would you want to give her up?"

"Who says I'm giving her up?"

"Well, she's leaving.”

"Yeah, so she’ll be safe until this all passes. And besides, it's just geography. Raz says I'll be able to open portals to anywhere once my gifts are at full strength. Easy to visit girlfriends in New York." He nudged my shoulder.

"So you guys aren't breaking up?"

"Why would I do something that stupid?"

"Well I just figured since she's leaving."

"No way. She’s my Gemini, even if she is human. But I believe her, too. Phoebe believes there’s something in store for us. We have doors opened, and we walk through them. She may be going to New York for now, but this is just the beginning. All our lives are about to change."

"I don't know if I can do this without her." I sighed and lowered my head to stare at my ring. "You don't understand. I've already lost Sophie and Eli. Now to lose Phoebe, too? Who do I have left?"

"Oh, I don't know. Why don't you ask Cade?"

A strange tingle shot up my spine. I turned around and there he was, looking like I just killed his kitten.

Remie squeezed my shoulder, then walked out.

My heart sunk into my stomach.

"I heard about Phoebe. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I had to be sure you’re all right."

Something about all this released the floodgates. I couldn’t hold my emotions in any longer.

Cade sat beside me at the piano bench and pulled me into his lap.

I buried my head into his shirt, unintentionally soaking it with my tears. "I can't lose her. I can’t lose another person in my life."

"I know." He worked his hand through my knotty hair and moved it off my shoulders. "I'm here for you, love. You won't ever lose me."

I lifted my head, my cheeks heated. Chest tight. “That’s BS."

"I don't understand."

I narrowed my eyes. "You. How can you sit there and say I'll never lose you? If this Eternal Sacrifice is in fact, for Eternity, then I keep getting kicked off the island. Repeatedly. I will lose you. Again. How many times can one person go through this?"

I picked myself up from his lap and stood.

"Zoe." He reached for me.

"Don't.” I pushed my palm out. I had to get out of there. “I know you're only trying to help, but I need some air."

Zoe

“Zoe.” Lucci grabbed my arm as I stepped backstage after we finished the first set. “See if the others can take over. We have a contract to negotiate.”

My stomach twisted in knots. Holy crap.

I nodded, and ran to the dressing room. “Hey guys, can I talk to you for a sec?”

“What’s up?” Phoebe asked.

“Lucci brought a rep from Infinity Records to come see us tonight. He wants to talk about a contract.” Blank stares all around.
Here we go.
“I know what you’re thinking, but just hear me out. I kinda talked to Cade already. He agrees that if I need closure, I should have it. So, I’m going to talk to them. Just see what they’re thinking.”

“Is that really a good idea?” Phoebe narrowed her eyes. “I mean, getting your hopes up?”

“We’re just talking, Phoebe. I’m not saying I’m going to take it, but I am going to hear them out.”

“Cade’s really okay with this?” Remie asked. “What about Raz?”

“Um—” Neither knew, but Cade did sort of say it was okay. “First, Cade doesn’t own me. I’m still free to make my own decisions. And second, I’m just going to talk to them.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “What’s the big deal?”

“You’re opening up Pandora’s Box.” Rainah glared and put her hands on her hips.

“She’s right, Zoe.” Phoebe said. “This is a bad idea.”

“Stop worrying, it’ll be fine. I need you guys to support me on this. One last time.”

Phoebe pursed her lips.

Remie and the others looked to each other with narrowed glares.

“Just do this one thing for me. Please. We’ll talk later.” I resisted rolling my eyes.
Not an easy task.
“It’ll be fine. Promise.”

I turned around and headed out to the Infinity table. I wasn’t going to stand there and endure more of their disapproving looks. This was supposed to be a pivotal night, and I wasn’t about to let them ruin it for me.

I crossed the room to Lucci and Sam Gaits’ table.

Sam and another guy stood. “Zoe, good to see you again. This is Chase Cirrus, one of the producers here at our Chicago studio.”