Gage, Ronna - The Search is Over (Siren Publishing Classic) (21 page)

“Candi, I’m sorry but I…I’m just not ready.”

She pushed past him and stomped to the closet. “I’ll be by next weekend to get the rest of my things.” She pulled a set of luggage from the top shelf. Setting each piece on the bed, she packed them with clothes.

Rafe could tell by her ramrod straight posture there was no talking to her right now. She wasn’t going to listen or hear anything he had to say. Besides, if they talked, she would probably cry, and he couldn’t handle a woman’s tears.

“Where will you go?” Rafe regretted letting her go this way. He loved her and cared for her well-being.

“That really
is
…none of
your
concern.”

Candi walked past him to the bathroom. She threw shampoo, conditioner, her makeup, deodorant, and other essentials into her bag. Walking out with him following close behind, she said nothing. Baggage packed, she lifted the two pieces of luggage and stalked to the door.

“I will get the rest of my stuff when I find my own place.”

She pulled the door closed, locking Rafe in the apartment.

Thirty minutes was all it took for Candi to pack and leave him. Rafe watched her from the window while she loaded her small car. He felt like a heel…a heel filled with regret.

* * * *

Tears of anguish streamed down Candi’s face. Although she had prepared herself for this very thing, it still hurt. She felt it in the pit of her stomach.

She had one month left of school and now faced another breakup.
This one hurts more than the last.
She wanted to fight, kick and scream, but to do so wouldn’t make him aware of what she knew already. She and Rafe were destined to be together, but his fear overwhelmed him, and he chose to give her up.

Living with a mean drunk was not the lifestyle she wanted. Rafe would have to give it up or learn to drink in moderation.
Your leaving is for the best
.
You’ll find out if you have it in you to be alone, and Rafe can find the answers to the questions inside him
.

The radio played an old song that wrapped around her like an old friend and gave her the strength she needed to persevere.

Planning it out, she had to find a cheap but safe apartment. The first thing she had to do was get some more money to last her the weekend. The best place to get quick money?

Work.

Taking the advice of the song, Candi hardened her love and dried her eyes, in the hope that tough love would work for her.

“Rafe will soon realize I’m the one. I have to wait him out.”

Chapter Thirty-Six

Rafe walked up to the front door to the apartment expecting to find Candi sitting at the table doing her homework, or getting ready for work at the bar, or even waiting to make amends for last night. He inserted the key and turned the knob. Once inside he sighed at the lonely quiet that almost deafened him.
Candi didn’t come back after all.
He walked in, closed the door, and leaned against the wall, taking in the sounds around him. There were no sounds of laughter, or the high volume of the television turned to the news as she cooked dinner, no loud music from the stereo, just a deafening quiet that reverberated off the four tiny walls and into Rafe’s ears. To make matters worse, her things were missing. “She moved out while I was at work.” Without them, his apartment didn’t look like a home at all. He found a note on the coffee table. Quickly, he picked it up and read it.

Dear Rafe,

I’m sorry to move out on you while you were at work, but I felt it was better for the both of us. But as I promised, I have no regrets in meeting you, loving you, and I hope you find genuine happiness. I think you deserve that.

All my best, Candi

He inhaled, only to smell her perfume in the air and on the paper, and his frustrations mounted. His stomach lurched, and then his heart broke. Exhaling a sigh of sadness, Rafe tried to accept the facts and admit what lay out before him.
Candi is gone!
All she left was the key to the apartment and a note professing that she wouldn’t regret loving him.

* * * *

For the next four days, Rafe lived in a stupor of hope that she’d come back to him. In that small amount of time, which seemed like an eternity, he grew more miserable. He hadn’t heard from her or found any clues to where she’d moved to, and it added to the burden. Growing frantic with wait, he decided to take matters in his own hands. “I’m coming to you, Candi. I have to know you are all right.”

He pulled out of the parking lot of his dad’s auto garage and smiled. “I’ll see her at the bar.”

Rafe walked into the bar and let his eyes adjust to the light change. Few patrons gathered for this time of day. “Perfect, I can have a minute alone to talk to her.” Rafe took a seat at the bar, almost in the shadows and waited. He looked around for Candi, but didn’t find her anywhere.

“Well, if my eyes don’t deceive me, Rafe!” Minerva greeted with enthusiasm. “How are you doing?”

He stood up from the barstool. “Hello, Minerva.”

The two hugged in greeting. “What brings you by here?”

Okay, we’ll play it that way
. “I’m looking for Candi. I wanted to say hello and make sure she was all right.” He looked around. “Where is she?”

Minerva worried her lip. “I’m sorry, but you made the trip out here for nothing.”

He sat down on the barstool. “What do you mean?”

“She quit.

Surprised by the announcement, Rafe worked to gain control. “Quit! When?”

“Uh, about two days ago.” She poured him a beer and then set it down in front of him.

“Where did she go?”

Minerva shrugged her shoulders. “She refused to tell me too much about her new place.”

“What did she say?”

“She’s living and working on the North Side.”

“What is she doing for work?”

“She told me that she is working in her field and would be starting her new job in November.”

Rafe downed the glass of beer and then placed a five-dollar bill on the counter. “Minerva, thank you and have a good life.” He walked out of the bar more bewildered than when he walked in. He drove home, processing the information Minerva gave him. He took her decision to have no contact with him as a sign.
She didn’t love me after all.
The pain added to the anger and the list of emotions he already tried to analyze.

“Forget her. If she really loved me she wouldn’t have left me here to worry,” he reasoned. He entered the apartment to a proverbial photo gallery. Pictures of them bombarded his vision. To see her smiling face, laughing eyes, and her in that bikini brought back so many memories. “Why did she leave these here?” Rafe couldn’t find a logical reason for it. Moaning, he found one. “She wanted to torture me,” he sighed bitterly. Grabbing his keys, he headed out the door.

Somewhere is someone, if not her, to talk to.

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Finding Rafe Sines in the lounge of her hotel was the last thing Sheila Mason had expected.
It must be fate.
She worked late on most Saturdays getting ready for the peak time of the season. Looking around, she wasn’t surprised to see the slow crowd. Most of the hotel guests would be in next week for the Thanksgiving holidays.

She had a full weekend scheduled for the festivities. She confirmed all the last-minute details. The entertainment area of the hotel was her department. If she could pull off a good holiday season, she was guaranteed the hotel manager’s spot for the hotel chain’s grand opening in
Austin
. She worked hard for that goal all year and nothing was going to stop her from achieving that goal now. Her final walk-through of the hotel led her to the lounge.
You look like you’ve matured my friend. I’ve never seen this side of you before.

Sheila’s heart raced at the sight of him alone. Looking around, she noticed Candi wasn’t anywhere in sight.
Good, no more competition
. Confidently, she walked to where he sat at the bar. Giving the attentive bartendress a subtle shake of her head, she leaned against the bar.

“Karen, I swear we let anyone in here these days,” she teased as Rafe lifted his head. With that casual smirk that only he possessed, Rafe stood up and gave her a friendly hug. Sheila’s heart melted.

“Should I throw him out?” Karen teased with a big smile.

Sheila looked at Rafe as if contemplating what to do with him. She had all the points on her task list complete.
I can afford myself an early evening…for Rafe
. “No, I think I’ll take care of him.” Sheila turned back to Karen. “Could I have my usual? And get Mr. Sines another one.”

With a nod, Karen went to work on the drink order.

“Let’s go over here.” She led him to a quiet corner in the back. The jukebox played a soft tune.
Perfect!
The dimmed lights and casual music were exactly what she needed to keep him concentrating on her. Sitting in opposite chairs, Sheila placed her bag on the empty seat next to her. Looking at Rafe, she tilted her head and analyzed him quietly.

“So, how have you been?” Rafe asked, unflinching under her tense scrutiny.

“I’m doing better than you.” Sheila’s offhand murmur was cut short at Karen’s sudden appearance with the new round of drinks. Lifting her clipboard and keys, she handed them to Karen. “Will you put this in the office for me?”

“Yes, and I will hold the keys behind the bar until you are ready for them.”

Sheila picked up her tall drink of cranberry juice. Topped with fresh pineapple chunks, cherries, and an umbrella, it hit the parched spot on Sheila’s tongue.

“What in hell are you drinking?” Rafe’s annoyance was evident.

“A cranberry mist.”

“What are you going to do? Eat it or drink it?”

“Mighty testy, aren’t you?” Sheila’s question obviously irritated him further.

“No one asked you to join me.” Rafe stared hard in her direction until she turned away from his heated glare. “I don’t need to be rescued.”

“Rafe, stop snapping at me! It is uncalled for.” Knowing Rafe as she did, hell would freeze over before he apologized. “By the way, I’m not here to rescue you!” Sheila snapped back. “Speaking of which, where’s Candi?”

Sheila waited patiently as his eyes reflected so much unspoken information.
He always had very expressive eyes.
When necessary, he could hide his feelings, but if things were hard, as they seemed to be now, he showed his emotions in his eyes.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Rafe’s gaze cut her deep. “
Speaking of which
?”

“Nothing!” Sheila raised her hands in surrender. “God, you are so touchy tonight.” Sheila let a moment pass between them before she spoke again. “Why aren’t you at the Desert?”

Rafe gruffly picked up his glass and took a drink. Shaking his head was his only answer. “Going there doesn’t appeal to me anymore.”

“I bet Cherry isn’t happy.”

Rafe gave her a narrowed look. “I don’t give a damn.”

Sheila ignored his curt statement.
This isn’t good at all. I need to find another tactic.
“Where is she, Rafe?” she asked softly. Rafe gazed deeply into her eyes. The anger, fear, and pain flashed so quickly Sheila almost missed them.

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen her for a week.”

* * * *

The quiet yet bitter confession painfully stuck in the air. Rafe felt so miserable. Sitting here with Sheila should have made him content. Here was a good friend that he could use to his pleasure.

She was pretty.
J
ust like Candi
. She could motivate him to improve himself.
Like Candi
. An enterprising person.
L
ike Candi
. Who refused to settle.
L
ike Candi
.
Just like Candi.
Candi is all I can think of.
“This is useless.” He took a swallow of his bourbon and soda and felt it burn as it passed his gullet.

“Do you know where she is?”

“She is somewhere on the north side of town. She quit her job at the bar, found herself an apartment, and is going to school. She’s moving on with her life…without me.”

Sheila sat back in her chair but kept a steady eye on him. “You look like shit!”

“Yeah? Well, I feel like shit.” His eyes caught hers. Her brown eyes revealed how eager she was to please him, but she wouldn’t settle for just a casual fuck. She wanted more. Rafe realized he couldn’t give her more.
She’s not the one
.

At a loss he swiped his hands down his face. “What am I going to do?” he whispered. “I have no idea what to do next.”

Sheila sat quietly across from him. He hadn’t really expected her to answer his questions. “Enough about me. Tell me about how your work is going.”

“I am going to
Austin
. If all goes well this holiday season, I will be the new manager for the new chain out there.”

“Good for you,” Rafe cheered.