Gabriel (40 page)

“Do you know who this is?” I asked.

Ruadhan shook his head. “No, sweetheart, I don't.”

I turned the leather bindings horizontally and pointed to the words in the left corner. “
El efecto mariposa
. Mean anything to you?” I asked, hoping for a glimmer of recognition.

“Aye. Well, some of it at least. Mariposa was Jonah's sister's name. That must be a portrait of her.”

Mariposa. Jonah's sister.

The book fell from my grip, and Ruadhan caught it before it hit the floor.

“Don't you dare make her death count for nothing,” Jonah had said. I knew who he meant now—Mariposa. Jonah believed his sister had died in order to set off a chain of events that would lead him to me, chaos that had meaning … the purpose of which was to save me.

A thousand thoughts tumbled, turning over in my mind. But it was hard to focus on any of them with the drumming sound still beating in the background.

The realization found me, overcoming all other thoughts.

The pound of the drum.

I launched myself from off the bed as though I'd just been shocked. “He's not dead!” I roared.

Ruadhan sprang up, bringing my waving arms down to my sides, trying to calm me. “Love, it's okay to be upset; we are all upset. But he is
gone
.”

“No, no he's not!” I tugged away. “Ruadhan, please, what did you see when Gabriel expelled his light? What happened?” I demanded.

“You know what happened. Come on now, stop.”

“Ruadhan,
tell me
.” I grasped him by his shirt.

“Gabriel struck him with his light. He fell backward and then … Sweetheart, please, you don't need to do this to yourself,” he said, squashing his large hands over mine.

“He fell backward, and then what? There was no ash, no dust, not a trace.… Ruadhan,
he didn't burn
,” I stated.

“Love, it's over. He's lost to the darkness now.”

His words caused the spark in my subconscious to grow. I paced around the room in a small circle, my head held down as I contemplated. “Gabriel's light propelled him backward, and he fell through the rift before it could end him,” I said, sounding out my thoughts.

“Even if that were so, he would have lost his form the moment he touched the dark matter.” Ruadhan was following my route around the room, trying to stand in my way.

I couldn't argue with Ruadhan—Jonah should have lost his form—but the echo inside me belonged to him. I had thought it to be the remnants of a cry from within Gabriel as his crystal failed, but I was wrong. It had come from Jonah.

Jonah had drunk from me on several occasions; he'd taken my dark matter through my blood. Whatever I had inside me that allowed me to keep my form in all worlds—perhaps this singlet particle that Darwin had told me about—could have just as conceivably transferred to Jonah, too. And his soul was dark; it matched the third.…

Jonah was lost to his darkness all right—he was in the third dimension.

But the beat had been fading with every hour that had passed. I didn't have a dark crystal; I couldn't command a rift to the third to open. Was there another option? There was the fixed gateway in Lucan that Gabriel had told me existed. But if I couldn't travel by thought across water, it might be too late by the time I found it.

Ruadhan seized me by my shoulders. He stroked my short hair, tucking the loose strands behind my ears. “You will be okay, I promise. Time heals all things.”

I snapped my eyes to his.

“Time. Heals. All,” I repeated calmly.

Ruadhan had just given me the solution to an impossible problem.

I knew what I had to do then.

“Love … Are you feeling okay? You've been through a lot. We should talk about that, talk about what we're going to do next—”

I cut him off. “I have to go.”

“What do you mean? Where to?” he asked.

I cast my gaze back down to the sketchbook, focusing on it as I was flooded by the enormity of what I was about to attempt.

“Lailah.”

I grabbed him in a bear hug, kissing him roughly on the cheek, and I smiled at the familiar scratch of his stubble. “Thank you.”

I closed my eyes and thought myself away.

*   *   *

I
WAS BACK AT
the entrance of the forest within a matter of moments. Dusk was fast approaching, twilight was dwindling, but right this moment it matched the color of my soul.

I jumped over the fallen tree trunks and pushed my way through the carpet of bloodied leaves and broken branches. I hadn't taken much time to fully observe the destruction that marked the nightmarish events of this morning, but as I stood on the outskirts of the clearing, a sense of eerie serenity soaked the scenery.

The ground was covered in thick coatings of ash and puddles of goo that were sticking to my shoes. I picked my feet up, marching to where I had stood next to Gabriel. Pressing my palm to my crystal gem, I took comfort from its coolness.

Staring at Jonah's sketchbook, a small voice in the back of my head argued that it wasn't possible, and if it were, who was I to think I could change the past? But I had ended a Pureblood right here—an inconceivable feat.

I steadied my nerves and shut my eyes tightly. I pictured the scene: Jonah positioned ahead and Gabriel behind me. I ran the memory through my mind, looping it over and over, and at first nothing happened. I tried again, this time seeking out the feel of Gabriel's skin on mine.

Warm, sunny shades replaced the drab colors of early dusk, gradually returning me to the echo of this morning.

In my mind's eye, Gabriel sidestepped me, his fingers digging into my skin as he looked from me to Jonah.

As Gabriel raised his hands, I focused as they met my chest. I stretched my mind, reaching out for the feel of his force.

The scene rippled, the colors in the clearing absorbing me into them as I became painted back into the picture.

I let the pressure to my chest travel through me.

I was reliving.

When this had happened to me before, I had wondered whether I was merely trapped inside the events that had come to pass or whether I could somehow change things. Now was the time to find out. Jonah wasn't dead—he was lost, and I was the only one who could rescue him.

I fought hard and swung my body up and away. I landed next to Jonah in a hazy blur. I extended my hand. “No.”

Static vibrated in tiny particles, gently bouncing the picture up and down. The pigments of color faded, and my gray bled into the portrait, spilling across the scene. The fractured air hung dubiously, as though Gabriel's light ahead was opposing me. I willed time to remain at bay, and reached for Jonah's jacket. I thrust my weight into his side in an attempt to push us both away. But he didn't budge. I wrapped my arm across his back and tried again, this time bending my knees and jumping. Still he didn't shift.

Flecks of yellow electricity surfaced at the ends of Gabriel's light and the strobes oscillated erratically, beginning to creep nearer.

I cursed myself for my arrogance—and then I thought back to Darwin's theory, and I cursed the man wearing the jacket.

I recalled what Darwin had said: The universe didn't give without taking; all things must be equal.

A small, sarcastic snort left me, and, aware that I was beginning to lose the fight with time, I was left with one final thing to accept and embrace: the exchange.

I unclasped the ring from around my neck and fastened it around Jonah's instead. I was leaving it for Gabriel, giving him the only thing I had left to offer: a second chance.

The sparks lunged forward, streaking into my gray, and I turned to meet Jonah. His eyelashes fluttered ever so gently as the color in his face returned, moving down over him and past his cheekbones.

I whispered quickly in his ear, pausing to see his renewed hazel eyes slowly slide to the corner. He could hear me. Finally, I took the easiest breath of my life, and said, “I came back for you, Jonah.”

The only part of this masterpiece that I cared to now regard was his lips. I kissed them for one last time, and I thought for a fleeting moment that he squeezed back.

Gabriel's light—now a mere inch from us—flamed in a luminous fireball and began shooting through the last of my gray.

I thought the action, and it happened instantly.

Jonah rocketed away from me.

The whip of air as he left dried the last of the wet paint, time wobbled and then fully restored.

I had been time's prisoner once, and yet here I had wielded the hands of the clock. But it didn't matter whether I was the one stealing or the one being stolen; it all led to my incarceration. Time was never on my side.

Now I would be sent to the one place that the nowhere itself didn't dare enter. And if I couldn't escape, then neither would the Purebloods. Zherneboh had made me a weapon, and I would make sure he watched the bomb he had created detonate at his feet.

This morning, I had found the strength to live for me.

By dusk, I had decided to die for everyone else.

Ruadhan might well get his savior after all.

A last smile creased my cheek as I thought of Jonah, and Gabriel's wave of light smacked me with all its might.

Carrying me away in its ferocious tide, his light sent me crashing toward the shores of Hell.

 

EPILOGUE

JONAH

T
HE SHEET OF LIGHT
in the distance flickered and then faded. My back smashed into a tree hard enough that I was able to bring myself to a jarring halt. Dazed, I raced back to the clearing.

“Lailah!” I roared, my attention locked to the black smudge of the rift that was shrinking. I searched for her, but she was gone.

“Lad, you're … How did you?” Ruadhan's question met me like an accusation.

Gabriel was crouched low to the ground; he raised his face, which fell in a confused expression when he found me standing in one piece. He got up then, his glare leaving me and fixing on the rift instead.

Anguish streaked down me. I careened into Gabriel, and to my surprise he went down with ease. The kid farmers scattered around the side of us, reaching for their weapons, and I hissed, brandishing my fangs.

“What the hell did you do?” I shouted, holding Gabriel by his throat beneath me. I waited for a reaction, anticipating the Angel's retaliation, but it didn't come. Something was wrong; the quiver of his top lip and his aggrieved expression told me that he wanted to hurt me, but his weak eyes gave away his inability.

Ruadhan pulled me off him, bumping me to the side, and then helped Gabriel to his feet.

“Where is she?” Gabriel sounded, his pitch heightening.

I chewed the inside of my cheek, turning to view the diminishing rift.

Both Gabriel and Ruadhan followed my sight and Gabriel cried, “No! That's not possible. I pushed her away.… Lailah!” he bellowed.

But he was met with no reply.

He was unsteady on his feet as he lunged at me, smacking my chest, but then he stopped. “Her ring,” he said, reaching for it around my neck.

I peered down and, sure enough, there it was. I couldn't recall when she had passed it to me, but the things she whispered in my ear were ringing loud and clear.

“She left this for you,” I said. Grinding my teeth, I unclasped it, but instead of handing it to Gabriel, I gave it to Ruadhan. “She said your crystal would fail, and to give you this when you once again found your light. I guess she was right.”

I almost didn't want to part with the information; I wanted to leave him in the dark, see how he liked it for a change, but I knew she would have never forgiven me.

“I don't understand.” His voice was small.

“She said you should go to Iona. Some crap about light being love, and when you love her, your immortality would be restored with that.” Stupid piece of rock … I should have launched it a thousand miles away. But then I'd rather he live forever, suffering with the knowledge of what he'd done. Although, he had lost his light, which meant he was fallen. I could just kill him.…

“What? Why would she say that? When would she have even had the chance? You should be dust, and she should be here!” Gabriel began drifting toward the rift, but the third dimension was the one place where he couldn't chase after her.

I knew what it was like, for her to be so out of reach, and reluctantly I relented. I took up position beside him. “I don't know how she did what she did, but, Gabriel…” I commanded his attention. “She said to tell you that inevitability means nothing when there is choice, and that her choice was
me
.” I let the words hover, not fully understanding all of what she had said, and not entirely sure that I believed what I thought she was trying to say.

Gabriel stepped backward, Ruadhan's hand finding his shoulder, and to my surprise he didn't argue. “Did she say anything else?”

I looked from the rift back to him, sparing only a moment to glare in warning at the young lads who were daring to come toward us. I reserved a special flare of flame in my eyes for Phelan. “She told me not to follow her.”

“You couldn't even if you wanted to, lad; none of us can follow her there. She must stand alone now.” Ruadhan's tone oozed a sense of pride and it irked me. How dare he be proud of her sacrifice for me, for them, for
anyone
? Why did she have to fight, to fall? Why her? She deserved more than the little this life had offered her.

Anger flooded me. Somehow she had spared me from Gabriel's wrath, and she'd doomed herself to do it. And she'd done so despite all the things I had said to her, and they had cut deep.

I knew Lailah; she would meet her end if she had to, and she would meet it alone. Stupid, stubborn girl …

I didn't want to remember the things she'd whispered in my ear, thinking they were the last words she'd ever say to me. But I forced myself to focus, searching for something, anything.… She had reminded me one last time to run from the hurricane,
to not dare follow her
.