Fusion (12 page)

“Nice!” Maria said when the bell sounded.

I looked at it: a pretty awful self portrait. I burst out laughing. Well, art had never been my strong point, but that was bad even for me.

“What the heck is that supposed to be?” She laughed.

“Me, I guess.”

“You were supposed to paint an animal. You’ve been working for weeks on a portrait of Gertrude.”

I looked at the canvas again. Sheesh. I had turned Gertrude into a human.

I shrugged. “Whatevs. What’s next? We’re in the same classes as usual, right?”

“Yes, on to math.”

Math class was no problem at all. I seemed to be able to hop right in. I looked down at the illegible scribbles in my notebook. I hated that. What a mess! I’d have to get new notebooks.

The day went by without any drama. I merged into the regular routine. Lunch, however, was a bit awkward. I’d made an ass of myself at the last lunch, so the girls were slightly standoffish with me when I first got there. Ali helped to smooth things over by diverting everyone’s attention to the next cheer meet. I wanted to hop into the conversation but decided to take things slow the way Mom had suggested. Plus, I didn’t want anyone jumping down my throat. To these girls, I had been absent from cheering for a whole year. Normally, that would have meant the end, but Ali was one of my best friends, and she was now the captain, so I was pretty sure I’d have no problem rejoining the team.

“Hey!” Ariele slid down beside me.

All the girls turned to watch us. I had been so unfriendly to her during the last lunch. I smiled widely at her. “Hey.”

“How are you coping with classes?” she whispered as the girls resumed their cheer talk.

“Fine, no problems. Well, apart from trying to read the atrocious handwriting.”

Ariele snickered. “Yeah,
A’
s penmanship is like a toddler’s. Kellan can help you with that, though. He seems to be an expert at figuring out what those scribbles mean.”

I rolled my eyes. “Good to know. Apparently, I’ve got a physics project due, and I thought I found my”—I finger quoted—“
notes
. I’ve got no idea what I am doing.”

“You’re doing that project about time travel with Kellan. He’s your partner, didn’t he tell you?”

“No, he didn’t tell me that we were supposed to do it together. That’s strange. He’s been like working on it nonstop.”

“I guess he wanted to give you some time to get back into it. Where is he anyway?”

“The hockey team took off to travel to a one-day tournament. I’m going to catch up with him later.”

She nodded. “Hey, did you get a chance to talk to David?”

“Yeah, and I’ll tell you, but not here. Let’s finish up and head to the restroom.”

Once we were alone in the restroom, I told her what David had shared with me.

“I’m dead?” she asked.

“Well, like I said, no one knows. But you are famous in a way, so you can’t just show up in the other dimension. The press will be all over you.”

She frowned and fidgeted with her hair. “Maybe, but I am still going,” she said firmly.

I guess I couldn’t argue with that. We’d just have to make sure to keep a low profile.

“Did you talk to your mom?”

“I’m going to right after school.”

“Can I come with?”

I thought about it for a minute, weighing the pros and cons. The major pro would be that Ariele could back me up with the background—about knowing the other Arizona. However, Mom would shut me down if I didn’t approach this in just the right way, and that would be easier to do on my own. “I think it might be better if I go on my own, at first anyway. You know, to test the waters.”

She nodded. “Yeah, I can see that might be easier. No point in getting her back up.”

“Exactly. I’ll call you later?”

“Sure. Hey, Arizona? You might want to ask her about your dad.”

“Huh?”

“About Dillard.”

M
uch as she felt a certain calm staring at the blank screen of her computer monitor, it was time to start going through the hundreds of email messages Olivia knew waited out in cyberspace… starting with the one that she’d read just before her car accident. She opened it up again.

I am not an idiot. Did you really think this would work? Send me the authentic one. Now. I have Arizona, and Dillard is on his way. Raj Sen

She re-read the last part of the last sentence.
Dillard is on his way
. On his way where? Was he in Mountain View? What about Raj? Rupert had assured her that he was not going to be a bother anymore. But what about Dillard?

She wasn’t even sure which Dillard Raj had meant—the one she had escaped from in New Jersey, or the other one who lived in Leeds. She quickly scanned through her messages looking for others from Raj or Dillard, hoping for none, but she found several from Raj. They were all the same: urgent demands for the blueprints.

Olivia remembered back to her last encounter with Dillard. Well, it wasn’t exactly a meeting, but a threat of an encounter made by Simla, and Dillard had been here in this very building. Which Dillard was that? The only way to know that for sure would be to see him. Appearance-wise, the two Dillards were very different. The one in New Jersey had clearly been influenced by her style choices for a longer time. Finding out which Dillard she might have to deal with would be a start. She picked up the phone and called security. “Dr. Darley here. Would it be possible for you to send me the security footage from the lobby area if I give you a date and time interval?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“How long will it take?”

“Is it an emergency?”

“No, but I would be very appreciative if you made it a priority.” She didn’t like waiting, and hopefully the security guard would jump right on her request taking her generous holiday gifts into consideration. There was a short silence on the other end. “I was going to go on a break, but I’ll do this first. I’ll email you in about ten minutes or so. Is that okay? Could you send me the details?”

“Perfect, I will. What’s your name?” She noted it down on her iPad. She’d make sure to thank him extra specially at Christmas.

“Ma’am, your daughter just drove through the gate. Shall I send her up to your office?”

“Yes, please. And thank you.”

She got up from behind her desk and walked over to open her door, leaving it ajar for Arizona. She slid open her bottom drawer and pulled out the stuff that she’d gotten together for Arizona’s physics project. She spread it out on the coffee table and poured herself a cup of tea.

~

Instead of zoning out and listening to tunes on my way to Mom’s office like I normally did, I enjoyed the scenic ten-minute drive through the Stevens Creek trail to Ames. I pulled into the parking lot and parked in the visitor’s bay. The security guard waved me inside.

“Your mom knows you’re here, so go on upstairs, Arizona.”

“Thanks!” I walked over to the elevator and stepped inside. Mom was waiting for me when I walked out into the corridor.

“Hi, honey. Come on in!”

I walked into the familiar office, which was like a second home to both Ella and me. We had spent endless hours in there, playing and doing homework while mom worked. I even had my own drawer, the bottom one in her desk. She’d installed the latest gaming equipment and a home theater to keep us busy. In the corner was a bar with a fully stocked refrigerator and snack cupboard.

“Are you hungry?” Mom asked, probably noticing me eyeing the bar.

“Yeah, I am a bit.”

“Then let’s go into town for dinner after we go through this stuff.” She picked up a photocopy from the coffee table.

“What’s that?” I asked bending over for a peek.

“Just the stuff I promised Kellan and you for the project. I thought it was due today, though. Did you get an extension?”

“The physics project?”

She nodded. “I guess you don’t remember?”

“No, but I am catching up. I think Kell already finished it, but I’ll give him this stuff just in case.” I gathered the sheets into a pile.

“Some of it might need explaining. Do you want me to go through it with you? Kellan is at hockey today, right?”

“He is. Maybe we could all go through it together later; that is, if he hasn’t already handed it in.”

“Okay, let me know. Shall we go to dinner, then? Ready to go?”

“Mom, I actually wanted to chat about something else, not the project.”

“Oh? I guess there is a lot you need to know. Do you remember anything at all, yet?”

“Mom, do you ever wonder what happened to Dillard and the rest of the people we used to know in New Jersey after we left? Did you keep in touch with any of them?”

“I know it probably sounds very strange to you, especially considering how close you are with your friends here, but no, I didn’t.” She pursed her lips. “I was very unhappy in New Jersey, more so than I ever thought I would be. I felt isolated, alone, and I guess I never made an effort to make friends there, concentrating instead on finding a way out.”

“What about me?”

“I brought you over right after we moved from London. Remember, I traveled back in time to get you. So, yes, you missed your friends from London but never had a chance to make connections in New Jersey.”

“What about Dillard? Didn’t you want to keep in touch with him at all?”

“To be honest, no, although I am obviously curious about what happened to him. From time to time, I do wonder what he did after we left.”

“You’ve never wanted to go back and have a peek? Travel through the Portal, and look for yourself?”

Olivia smiled. “Of course I have. It’s very tempting, but something stops me. I can’t really explain it, but an ominous feeling comes over me when I think about it, that if I do, something terrible and irreversible will happen. I know it’s probably nothing, but all the same, the thought scares me.”

“I want to know what happened to my biological father,” I blurted, and then shut up, surprised by myself. Where had that come from? Biological dad? What did I care? I’d never given Dillard Stevens a second thought. Was this my brain working overtime, knowing exactly the right buttons to push to make Mom give in and help me use the Portal? If so, it was pretty impressive.

Mom drew a sharp breath. “Your biological father? Wow. That’s a bit sudden. You’ve never shared this desire before. You’ve never even referred to him like that.”

I scrunched up my nose. “I guess what’s happened in the last few weeks—year even—makes me want to know more about where I came from, my roots. I don’t really want to meet him or anything…” I stopped. “Well, I don’t think I do. Mom, I’m just so confused.” As the words came out of my mouth, I wondered if I really did want this. I had started off just wanting to see my doppelganger, but in my bid to do so and using this excuse on my Mom made me wonder if there was something to it. I had accepted my life without question. I was happy and stable in my everyday routines. The disruption was causing me to question everything, though. I needed to make sense of it all, and it seemed my mouth was ahead of my brain, relaying my thoughts to Mom before I even processed them for myself.

Mom got up and walked over to her desk, her back to me. I let her take time to think. I wondered what was going through her mind as she turned around and perched on the desk. She looked past me at the window, her thoughts obviously miles away.

For as long as I could remember, I’d always wished that I would grow up to look like her. Even as she sat on her desk, looking tired and worried, she could have been posing for the cover of
Vogue
. Her long brown hair framed her face perfectly. I was grateful that I shared her perfectly arched eyebrows, long lashes, and defined jawline, but I wished that my lips could have been just a little fuller like hers.

As her feet dangled from the desk, the red soles of her Louboutins seemed to snicker at me. I had hoped that my feet would grow to be the same size as hers, so I could share her Imelda Marcos-worthy shoe collection. However, when my feet suddenly grew from an eight to an eight-and-a-half, that dream was shattered. Still, I would be able to share her clothes and bag collection, though the navy Chanel suit she wore was not my thing. Not yet anyway.

“Arizona, I really do understand where you’re coming from. I’m just not sure how to deal with it. I’d like to talk to Rupert about it when he gets back. Is that okay with you?”

“But when is that going to be?”

“I really don’t know, but I’ll talk to him as soon as he comes home.”

“That could be too late,” I protested. “Plus, I don’t want you to tell him that I want to find out about Dillard.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t want to hurt his feelings.”

“Oh, I am sure he’ll understand.”

“Mom, I don’t want him to know.”

She flung her hands in the air. “Arizona, I really don’t understand that. Before I even consider the possibility of letting you travel through the Portal, I will have to discuss this with your dad.”

“No, Mom,” I whined, sounding like a two-year-old. “He won’t be okay with it. I know you think that, but he’s my dad, and I know it will never be the same between us if he thinks I am suddenly interested in finding my biological father.”