From Friend to Fake Fiancé (13 page)

So here he stood in the study of his childhood home, all alone. In the span of twelve hours he'd managed to anger those closest to him. Now he just needed to throw Ryker and Laney into the mix to round out his crappy day.

Mac pulled out his cell and called his pilot. Might as well get back to Miami and concentrate on work. It was the one area of his life that hadn't fallen spectacularly apart...yet.

Seventeen

A
ll Mac wanted was to crawl into bed and forget the world for a good eight hours. He'd flown from Bora Bora to Boston, then from there he'd come to Miami and gone straight to his new office. After working a few hours, he'd known if he didn't get home, he was going to do a face-plant on his desk.

He needed nothing but his king-sized bed and his phone on silent.

Mac started to unbutton his shirt as he made his way down the hall of his Miami condo. He'd chosen a penthouse with a killer beach view because he was so sick of the unpredictable weather in Boston. Miami was everything he loved: warmth, sunshine and attractive people. The art deco aesthetic in the city was also a great fit for his new offices and auction house. Considering O'Shea's pulled in art with every auction no matter the location, Miami was a no-brainer when it came to opening another branch and Mac had been all too eager to head it up. Not to mention Jenna had planted a bug in his ear about opening an office here since she'd arrived a couple of years back.

His gut clenched at the thought of her. So many times his mind just circled right back around to his best friend and he could do little to control it.

Mac jerked his shirt off and entered his bedroom. Before he could even tap the switch, that familiar floral aroma surrounded him.

“I thought you were never coming home.”

Jenna.

Mac quickly flicked the switch, drenching the room in light and his gut clenched at the sight before him. Jenna in his bed. Jenna naked in his bed. Jenna naked in his bed with the sheets rumpled all around her.

She tipped her head to the side and held his gaze.

“I figure you didn't mean to leave me without saying goodbye, so I thought I'd give you that chance,” she told him, as if this entire situation didn't warrant any questions.

“How did you know I was coming home?” he asked.

With a shrug, and clearly not concerned with her state of undress, Jenna let the sheets pool at her waist. “I used my key to get in and realized you weren't here. I called Braden, who told me you'd just left.”

If he weren't so freaked out about his feelings, about hurting her, he'd be all over her in that bed. Damn, but she was the best accessory in the room.

“You seem to be uncomfortable,” she went on. “Everything okay? I mean, I know we said we'd just play this week out, but even friends tell each other goodbye, right? Unless something else was bothering you and that's why you left me. Either way, I deserve an explanation.”

Mac remained locked in place. If he took a step forward, he wouldn't be able to control himself. Suddenly sleeping was the last thing he wanted to do in that bed.

“I couldn't stay.” At least that was the complete truth.

“Work?” she asked, quirking a brow as if she knew full well that wasn't what caused him to run.

He wadded his shirt up and tossed it toward the basket in the corner. “I can't get into this, Jenna.”

As much as he hated to be the guy who was a jerk the morning after, he was going to have to make her leave. She needed to understand exactly what she was dealing with and how far apart their worlds truly were.

“Oh. What exactly can't you get into right now? Would that be your feelings or just the simple courtesy of letting me know you were leaving?”

She was understandably angry and he deserved every bit of backlash she threw his way.

“Are you going to get dressed?” he asked.

Jenna tilted her chin, shot a glare across the room and then slid from the bed. “I suppose now that the week is over you're done. I get it. I was even well aware of the plan going in, but I still thought something had changed.”

She let out a laugh, void of any humor, as she scooped up her bra and panties. He watched as she slid into the bright red lingerie that was sure to make any man beg her to crawl back into that bed.

“I figured when you crept out of the room like a coward that you were scared of what had happened, so I was giving you the benefit of the doubt.” She reached down and grabbed her red dress, sliding it over her head. “Apparently you felt nothing or you're still freaked out. Either way, I'm not begging. Coming here was a risk I was willing to take, but it looks like only one of us has a set big enough to admit what they want.”

As she started to pass, Mac took one step and blocked the doorway. Jenna froze, staring into his eyes. She was clearly pissed, with her lips pressed into a thin line and the muscle ticking in her jaw. But it was the hurt, the vulnerability in her eyes that gutted him. He couldn't let her leave this room thinking she wasn't worth every single thing she wanted.

“I'm man enough to admit what I want, Jenna.”

“Prove it.”

There was no other way to do this. There was no happy ending between them unless they remained as friends, but was that even an option at this point? Could he honestly look her in the eye and lie about his feelings? He could if he wanted her to forget this notion that the two of them had any type of deeper relationship to build on.

“Wanting you physically has never been the issue,” he told her, steeling himself against the fierce determination in her eyes. “But we're done. Not that I wouldn't mind another dose of what you were offering, but let's be honest. We're back home now, reality has settled back in and everything that happened in Bora Bora needs to stay there.”

Those gorgeous eyes narrowed and Mac knew he'd struck a nerve, just as he'd intended. The knife he'd used to shred this bond was cutting into him and he was going to hate himself when she walked out of here. But at least she'd be safe, away from his lifestyle, and eventually move on with a man who had a completely legal job. Someone who didn't kill enemies who pissed him off one too many times. Someone who wasn't targeted by dangerous criminals dealing in death.

“You can't lie to me,” she stated. “I know you. I know what we had in Bora Bora was real and I know there was something deeper there than just sex.”

He said nothing. She was right, but he wasn't about to admit it. He admired her bravery. She'd come so far in such a short amount of time and he couldn't help but feel a swell of pride in knowing he helped her find her self-esteem.

“You can push me away, that's fine,” she went on, taking a step back and crossing her arms over her chest. “But you'll be miserable and you'll always wonder what would've happened if you had taken a risk. Isn't that what you O'Sheas do? Take risks?”

She was on fire. The more she talked, the more intense her tone became. She didn't raise her voice, but kept it calm, controlled. Much more lethal that way.

Mac had never been drawn to a meek woman and Jenna LeBlanc was definitely not meek. She was strong, hard-headed, stubborn and determined. He wouldn't expect anything less than a fight because when Jenna wanted something, she went after it. So did he.

“You're more than welcome to stay, but I'm about one minute from falling face
-
first into bed.”

Throwing her arms out to the side, she shook her head and sent him a mock laugh. “Go right ahead. Don't let me get in the way. But remember this, you're the one who let me walk out of here. You're the one who is throwing away something that could be amazing.”

Yeah, that was adding salt to the wound. He was fully aware of the life he was throwing away. But the life she wanted, the life she deserved, wasn't the life he could offer her. Constantly keeping secrets, not opening up to her about his work, having to take private calls without her overhearing, would all be too much for a relationship to bear.

“It's for the best.” He barely recognized his own voice.

She quirked a brow. “Really? Because you think you're protecting me? Because you are afraid to fully let me in? Do you think I'm not aware that what your family does isn't completely on the up-and-up? I'm not naive, Mac. Did you ever stop to consider that I'm stronger than you think?”

Shoving his hands in his pockets in an attempt to prevent himself from touching her, Mac nodded. “I'm fully aware how strong you are, Jenna. You're one of the strongest people I know. But anything between us beyond friendship isn't possible.”

“You think we can just return to being friends now?” Her eyes held his as if she truly thought he had a simple answer for such a complex question.

“That's our only option. You'll find someone you love and you'll spend the rest of your life with him. You'll wear your mother's wedding dress and get that fairy tale you want.”

“You think that's what this is? Me looking for some fairy tale?” Jenna turned, paced his bedroom. “I didn't get swept into the moment on the island, Mac. I spent more time with you, I got to know more of you and I opened more of myself to you than I ever had before.”

“Which will only make our friendship stronger,” he stated, as if that justified her deep connection and let him off the hook from feeling any more for her.

Standing here before her, he knew full well he was being a jerk, but he literally saw no other way out of this. Making her unhappy now would help simplify her life and make her happier in the long run. He had to remain detached from that longing look in her eyes, that questioning stare full of the hope that he was shattering.

“This is ridiculous.” Jenna shook her head and started for the door again. “Move.”

Mac remained still. She glanced down to the floor, then back up, blinking against the unshed tears in her eyes.

Enough. Mac snapped and grabbed her arms, hauling her against his chest. He ignored her shocked gasp.

“You think this is ridiculous?” he demanded with a slight shake. “What's ridiculous is thinking a relationship can work between us. You need to trust me on this, Jenna. I'm pushing you away because I care about you, not because I don't want more.”

Her eyes roamed his face as she blinked, taking in his statement. “You want more? As in...what?”

No. He wasn't taking the bait. Discussing things that could never happen was moot.

“It doesn't matter,” he claimed. “What matters is our friendship. I need to keep you at a distance, to prevent you from getting in too deep. This way you're still in my life and you can have your own life without the stress that comes from living in mine.”

“And you're making this decision for me?” she asked, quirking a brow.

He pushed her back and raked a hand through his hair. “Yes, damn it.”

Jenna's mocking laugh had his gut clenching. She still didn't see that he was doing all of this because he cared so much...too much. And this was why he didn't do relationships. Too many ways to get hurt, both physically and emotionally. He wished she would see that remaining friends was their best option.

His cell vibrated in his pocket, but he ignored it for the time being. He'd check it once Jenna was gone.

“I'm not sure friendship is an area I want to go with you again,” she told him, her defiant little chin lifted. “I've seen how much you care for me. I know it's in there and the fact that you're ignoring it only tells me how much you love me.”

Mac jerked back. “I never said love.”

In that moment a veil seemed to cover her face. Jenna's lips thinned, her lids lowered slightly as she gave a brief nod.

“That's all I needed to know. I'm sorry I made a fool of—”

“Hold on.” He jerked the vibrating phone from his pocket. “I have to take this. Don't leave.”

Her eyes widened as if she couldn't believe he'd cut her off.

The screen flashed Ryker's name.

“Hey, man.”

“How soon can you meet me in London?” Ryker asked.

Mac's eyes darted to Jenna. “Did you find something?”

“I believe so. I called Braden and he said to see if you could come. He told me about Zara.”

Mac swallowed his remorse. He hadn't told Jenna, hadn't wanted to pull the sympathy card.

With his eyes locked on Jenna, Mac replied, “I'll call my pilot and be in the air within the hour.”

Mac listened as Ryker went on to explain where he was staying and how hopeful he was that this was the lead they'd been waiting for.

But all the while, Jenna was grabbing her purse from the dresser, pulling out her keys and brushing by him without a word or even a glance in his direction.

Before he could finish the call with Ryker, his front door opened and shut with an echoing click. He'd gotten his wish. He'd pushed her away and now Ryker had a lead on the scrolls the O'Sheas had been in search of for decades.

Now that everything seemed to be within his grasp, now that he was ready to go after his father's legacy, why did he feel such a void? Why did he have a gut-sinking feeling that the very best thing that would ever happen to him had just walked out that door? And she'd walked out because he'd told her to; he'd forced her hand and left her no choice.

No regrets. Isn't that the motto he'd always lived by?

For the first time in his life, Mac was second-guessing every action, every choice he'd made for the past week and wondering how the control had slipped from his grasp. Then he realized Jenna had always been the one with the control. As much as he thought himself so powerful and strong, Jenna was the force behind all of that.

Sliding the cell back into his pocket, the fact he hadn't slept for over a day didn't even register. All he knew was that as soon as he got back from London, as soon as this auction in Miami was wrapped up next week, he was focusing on Jenna. Somehow, he had to make this right.

Now he had to figure out exactly what he wanted from her because he couldn't keep hurting her. Their friendship was over, no doubt about that. Now he either needed to cut ties completely or fully submerge her in his world, where he could protect her and keep her safe from his enemies.

Mac grabbed his bag by the door and quickly exchanged some of his clothes as he rang his pilot. When he ended the call, his eyes went to the rumpled bed and he couldn't forget that image of coming home and seeing Jenna in his bed.