Fringe Benefits (11 page)

He’d had enough play; it was time to move to the main event before he gave in to his licentious thoughts, ripped off her blindfold, and carried her upstairs.

Without warning, Nate scooped Dani into his arms and carried her to the sofa. “Do you trust me?”

Although she had to think it over, he took no offense. This wasn’t easy for her—that much was plain. She’d come so far in such a short time, but he meant to push her a little further.

He set her down and then sat at her side. “Time for the hard part.”

Her lips bowed into a pouty frown. “Not sure I like the sound of
that
.”

“I promised you, I won’t hurt you. Do you trust me? Or…”

She turned to face him, her hands fumbling until she found his arm. “I trust you, Nate.”

Taking her hand in his, he lifted it and brushed a kiss across her knuckles. “Then we get to play a little game.”

Dani’s hand trembled as she pulled back. “What happens in this little game?”

“We learn about each other.”

*   *   *

Shivers ran over her skin, and heat pooled between her thighs, making Dani squirm with desire. How odd that she couldn’t see a thing—his handsome face, that delectable dimple, or his charming smile—yet she wanted Nate with a bone-deep need.

The sound of his voice was tattooed on her brain; the scent of his cologne was branded on her heart. In her mind’s eye, she could see his deep blue eyes, his blond hair, the lean muscles of his body…

That morning, he’d asked why. She knew damn well what he was asking, but she couldn’t find the words to explain something she wasn’t sure even she understood.

Why?
Why was she ready to start exploring a connection with Nate? Because Nate had opened her eyes. Because the Ladies had opened her eyes. Because she started thinking of him as something other than one of the teachers in her department or her tenant or a younger man.

“For the first reward,” he said, his voice deep with what she believed was yearning, “you need to tell me one thing that you’ve done that no one else knows.”

Her heart started slamming in her chest as her brain scrambled for some lie that would make her look good in his eyes. “Um… I… I…”

Nate squeezed her hand. “No thinking about it. Just blurt it out. I want the truth, Dani. Not something you think I want to hear.”

“Nate…”

His lips touched hers for a kiss far too brief for her tastes. “You open up to me, and I’ll give with equal measure.”

Why couldn’t she believe him?

This trust stuff was the hardest thing she’d ever done, more difficult than losing her virginity or facing a classroom full of students for the first time. Both of those events seemed like a cake walk compared to having to bare her soul to Nate Ryan, to tell him things she’d never told anyone, even the Ladies.

Then she suddenly understood. She’d worn figurative masks her whole life, especially in those earlier events, those events that had terrified her. She’d put on a face to show people only what she’d wanted them to see to hide her fear, her vulnerability. Instead of a frightened virgin, she’d revealed only confidence. Rather than show her students that she was intimidated by being a real teacher, she’d shown only a tough-as-nails leader. Now, because she feared Nate and the way her feelings for him were growing, she was still hiding behind the same kind of mask.

And that was why he’d chosen the black silk that now covered her eyes.

“Fine,” Dani said, her voice full of conviction. “I sing show tunes in the shower. Every single time.”

She could almost see the grin on his face as she enjoyed his warm chuckle.

“I
do
,” she insisted. “And I’m absolutely tone-deaf, so I imagine it’s unbearable for anyone to hear. I’ve never told anyone that.”

His lips were suddenly on hers, and she quickly pushed aside the initial surprise and enjoyed the kiss. He took his time, leisurely stroking her mouth with his tongue, and when she tried to lean closer, he moved away.

She frowned. “That was my reward?”

“You didn’t like it?”

“I didn’t say that. I just told you a deep, dark secret, so I expected something… more.”

He took her hands in his. “It was a secret, but hardly deep and dark.”

“You promised equal measure,” she couldn’t help but point out. “So now tell me something you’ve never told anyone.”

“Last night, you had me so wound up, I had to masturbate or I’d never have gotten any sleep.”

When the man told a secret, he didn’t hold back.

“And I thought about you the whole time,” Nate added.

Her face felt as if it were on fire. “About me?”

He put her hand against his cheek and then nodded. “You were naked, by the way.”

“How could you picture me naked when you’ve never seen me without clothes?”

“I have a
very
vivid imagination.”

The heat spread down her neck, and she had trouble catching her breath.

“Tell me this, Dani,” he coaxed. “Have you ever touched yourself while you thought about me?”

She wasn’t about to answer
that
question. Shit, it would be easier to just strip off her clothes and stand there in the middle of her great room stark naked. Her body was easy to reveal; her secrets weren’t. “Nate…”

In one quick move, she found herself sitting on his lap. He rubbed his chin against her forehead before he rained kisses over her face and down her neck, making her shiver in pleasure. His tongue tickled her collarbone. “Tell me, sweetheart. Did you want me as much as I wanted you?”

“Yes,” she hissed.

“And did you touch yourself the way I had to touch myself to ease the ache?”

“Yes.” Her dilemma had been every bit as bad as his, and had she not pulled out her trusty vibrator, she’d never have slept a wink.

Telling him hadn’t been nearly as bad as she’d feared, but that didn’t mean she could speak quite as brazenly in the future.

Or could she?

He nibbled lightly on the sensitive place where her neck met her shoulder. “That wasn’t so hard, was it? To tell me the truth should never be hard.”

“It
was
hard.” Her voice was a whisper as tears stung her eyes.

Nate cupped her face in his hands and kissed her. “It’ll get easier. In time. I promise.”

“That sounds so romantic.” Beth let out a happy little sigh. “What happened next?”

Dani wasn’t sure why she’d waited so long to talk to Beth after Nate had blindfolded her—almost two weeks of pretending everything was status quo through lunches that seemed interminable. When Beth had stopped by her classroom after her last class, Dani had finally found the words to talk to her best friend.

She’d been unnerved in a way that she wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to. Nate was demanding a kind of intimacy that she’d never known before. Physical, she could handle. This emotional intimacy would be the death of her.

“Romantic?” Dani shook her head. “Try terrifying.”

“It doesn’t have to be terrifying,” Beth insisted.

“But… but…” Throwing her hands up in frustration, Dani said, “He wants me to share everything.”

Beth didn’t appear at all fazed. In fact, she seemed hard pressed to suppress a grin. “And that’s bad?”

“Bad? Shit, Beth. I don’t even know if it’s
possible
.”

“It’s quite possible, I assure you. I share so much with Robert. I think he knows me as well as you do. Maybe even better.”

Dani knit her brows, having a difficult time understanding two people being that open with each other. “You don’t have
any
secrets?”

“I didn’t say that, but there isn’t much I hide from him.” Then Beth’s cheeks grew ruddy. “Maybe there’s one important thing…”

“I knew it! So tell me all about it.”

Beth shook her head. “Not yet. But soon. I promise. Right after Robert, you’ll be the first to know.”

After rolling her eyes, Dani let out a sigh. “You can’t tell me? Or Robert?”

“Nope.”

“Then how in the hell can you expect me to bare my soul to Nate?”

“Do you like him? I mean really like him?”

“I… I think so.” That wasn’t the truth. Dani did like him.
Really
liked him. If she was going to start being open, perhaps she should begin with her best friend. “Yeah, I like him. Shoot, I might even be falling in love with the guy. And if that isn’t stupid, I don’t know what is.”

Beth cocked her head. “Why would falling for Nate be stupid?”

“Because I’m his boss,” Dani replied. “Because I’m a bunch of years older than he is.”
And because I’m bound to get my heart broken
.

“Tell me this—how did you feel when he was feeding you?”

“That question is every bit as scary as the ones Nate was asking.”

Beth’s face lit with a smug smile. “Well, then, answering me will be good practice for dealing with him.”

Although the question was frightening, coming up with the answer was easy. All Dani had to do was work up the courage to say the words aloud.

“C’mon, Dani. What do you have to lose… except a guy who might be your Mr. Right?”

“Wonderful.”

“Wonderful? Do you mean wonderful you could lose him?” Beth asked.

“No, I mean having him feed me felt…
wonderful.
”

*   *   *

“Hey.” Nate leaned back against the wall next to Dani.

“Hey.” She’d grown accustomed to him popping out of his room most passing periods to help her keep an eye on the students as they dug through their lockers or palled around with their friends. Locker bank duty was one of her least favorite parts of teaching, but having Nate there made it bearable. The worst part of being out with the kids during their five free minutes between classes was watching the boyfriends and girlfriends who treated the end of each passing period as though they were parting for the rest of their lives.

“So Jim Reinhardt bullied me into chaperoning the homecoming dance. Wanna go with?” he asked.

“That’s probably not a good idea.”

“Why?”

“I’d rather play things low-key.”

“What’s wrong with a couple of fellow teachers chaperoning the dance together?”

Dani shrugged. “Probably nothing.” Truth was that dances brought out the romantic in her, and she’d probably drag his ass out on the dance floor just so she could be in his arms.

“Good. Then it’s a date. We can grab dinner first.” Nate inclined his head at the principal working his way down the hall, dodging the kids and their hefty backpacks. “Wonder what’s up?”

Jim stopped in front of them. “Dani, I need to ask a favor.”

“Sure.”

“I need more chaperones for the homecoming dance. Since you haven’t done much this year… I hoped you’d take this one.”

How like him to guilt her into something—although she had to admit guilt gave him a weapon to make sure all school activities were supervised. And he was right. She hadn’t taken tickets at any sporting events or chaperoned any student events this school year. If she did Jim this favor, he might remember it when evaluations rolled around. “I’d be happy to.”

Jim nodded at Nate. “Really enjoyed the class yesterday.”

A grin bloomed on Nate’s lips. “Thanks, Jim. I appreciate that.”

“Keep up the good work.” On that, Jim headed back down the hall.

Nate fixed his smile on her. “So about dinner before the dance…?”

She couldn’t help but smile in return since Jim had all but sanctioned the two of them going to the dance together. She’d simply have to behave herself while they were there and show any gossips that there was nothing between them worth talking about. “Sounds great.”

He pushed away from the wall and went to his classroom, stopping long enough to turn back and say, “And don’t forget Friday. We’re trying that new Italian place they opened downtown.”

Damn if her face didn’t flush hot when a couple of students heard him and kept shifting their gazes between her and Nate, smiles plastered on their faces. She pressed her finger to her lips, hoping he’d pick up the hint.

All he did was chuckle.

Nate pulled Dani’s chair back so she could stand. She murmured her thanks, but the smile she’d given him through dinner had vanished.

He held back a frustrated sigh. Everything with this woman was two steps forward, one step back. They’d connected so well that first night. She’d been open and honest, and he knew he’d reached a part of her she’d tried to hide.

After two weeks of letting things between them settle into a comfortable calm, he’d figured they should be comfortable enough to go on a dinner date. He was more than ready to try to push a little harder when they got back home. Throughout the meal, she’d been animated, sharing some stories from school and discussing how they should start dividing up the grocery bill now that they were both eating there so often. He tended to take most of his meals upstairs instead of using his kitchenette.

Dani’s demeanor had changed the moment the check arrived. After the waiter set the black folder next to Nate, who’d planned on the meal being his treat, she’d argued, keeping her voice low and practically begging him to go Dutch. He’d stubbornly insisted and had let the waiter whisk away his money before she could try to add her own funds.

That was when she’d done the one-eighty. Now she was sullen and silent, and all he could think was that he’d somehow offended her. But how? Because he’d turned this dinner into a date by paying?

That made no sense.

Nate puzzled over Dani’s temperament change the whole walk home. He’d made some plans, another exercise in trust that he hoped would please her as much as the meal she’d been fed while blindfolded and the intimate talk they’d had after. He feared that if he tried to press her tonight, she’d shut down entirely.

Hell, she’d already shut down.

Since they’d eaten in the new restaurant in the old town area, they walked home along one of the paths they liked to run. The October weather had taken a decidedly chilly turn, and he was about to button his jacket when it dawned on him that Dani hadn’t worn one.

He doffed his. “Here. Wear my jacket.”

She shook her head. “You’ll get cold.”

“I’m fine.” Holding open the coat, he waited for her to comply.

“We’re almost home,” Dani insisted. “I’m fine.”

“C’mon, sweetheart. You can’t deprive a guy of the perfect chance to be gallant. Let me show you chivalry isn’t dead.”

“Thanks.” She let him help her into the jacket.

Nate turned her so he could pull it shut and button it. “Looks a lot better on you than it does on me anyway.”

The sun had already set, but there was more than enough light along the trail for him to see the confusion on her face. She stared up at him, almost as though she was waiting for him to say something.

He tucked a stray wisp of her long blond hair behind her ear. “Better?”

“Pardon?”

“Did the jacket make things better?”

“Much.” Still, she didn’t move, only kept her eyes locked with his.

Nate took her hand. “What’s bothering you so much?” When she tried to glance away, he gripped her chin to keep her looking at him. “You were great all through the meal. Now you’re being so quiet. I want to know why—I want to know what I did wrong.”

“I’m sorry, Nate. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was just thinking hard on something.”

His hand fell away from her face. “I’m not sure I like the sound of that…”

She quickly grabbed his free hand. “No, no. Nothing bad. I promise.” After a deep breath, she said, “I had a long talk with Beth today.”

He quirked a brow. “About…?”

“About you. About our little dinner a couple weeks ago. About the blindfold.”

A smile bloomed on his lips. “You know, I’m really glad to hear that.”

“You’re not mad?”

That question took him by surprise. “Mad? Why would I be mad?”

“Because I shared our private stuff with Beth.”

“No, Dani. I’m not mad at all. I’m actually happy that you have that kind of friend. I know you and Beth are close. Have you talked to Mallory and Jules, too?”

She shook her head. “Beth and I are a lot closer to each other. We were friends before the Ladies Who Lunch began. Mallory and Jules have the same kind of connection. When the four of us are together, it’s wonderful. But Beth is the one I trust most.”

Her choice of word could be nothing but an accident. “You
trust
her?”

Edging closer, the tips of her shoes touching his, Dani nodded. “And I… I trust you, too.”

The sincerity in her tone made Nate long to take her into his arms, carry her straight home, and make love to her. But it was still too early. Instead, he brushed his lips over hers just to let her know how happy she’d made him. Then he draped an arm over her shoulders and got her moving again.

The faster they got home, the faster they could begin the next round of the game.

*   *   *

Even though they were inside now and she wasn’t cold any longer, Dani didn’t want to give back the denim jacket. Nate’s scent clung to the fabric, and she had to resist the urge to keep burying her nose against the material and sniffing.

She felt as if something inside her had been freed, a rather odd thing considering that free feeling was about to get her tangled up in a romantic relationship. The irony brought a smile to her lips.

The decision had been made—in her heart and in her mind. This man was exactly what she wanted, who she wanted. Yes, there were speed bumps on the horizon, the biggest being how people at school would react. But she wouldn’t let those problems stop her from enjoying her time with Nate. They’d just have to do their best to keep their relationship on the down-low, especially doing their best to hide it from the people at Douglas High.

Nate took her hand and led her to the couch, where he pressed on her shoulders to get her to take a seat. “We should talk.”

“All right,” she replied sweetly.

His eyes widened a moment before his brows knit.

“What’s wrong?”

“I can’t seem to figure out what’s up with you tonight.”

“Nothing’s up.”

The welcome she’d seen glowing in his eyes under the lamplight gave way to irritation. “You’re like a chameleon tonight. You’re happy, then you’re pissed, and now you seem happy again.”

“That’s because I
am
happy,” Dani said with a nod.

After Nate raked his fingers through his hair, he let out a frustrated sigh. “Then I hope you’ll tell me exactly what I did to make you that way so damned quick. I’d like to be able to do it again sometime in the future.”

She patted the cushion next to her. “C’mere, lover. Have a seat. I’ll try to explain.”

The same way he’d tried “sweetheart” on for size, she’d struggled to find the right endearment for him before it hit her that she could affectionately call him exactly what she hoped he’d become. Her lover.

He took a seat but still eyed her warily.

She couldn’t blame him. From where he was sitting, she probably appeared to be suffering from bipolar disorder. Her moods had been volatile. The easy conversation throughout the meal, the way they could share so many things about their lives at school, and the humor and foibles of them sharing her home had relaxed her. Thanks to Beth’s admonitions about sharing, Dani had finally opened up.

And it had felt grand.

Then the waiter had set the check next to Nate, and her guard had snapped right back into place. They’d been on a date, a
real
date, and she hadn’t once tried to protect herself from him. In that moment, she’d realized with stark clarity that she not only wanted him to make love to her, but she also wanted him to love her. Period.

More shocking was the reason why it was so damned important that Nate learn to love her—she’d already let the guy wiggle into her heart. Oh, she might not love him yet. But it would be so very, very easy to take him inside her soul and hold tight.

Turning, she cocked her knee so she could lay her leg across the couch and look him in the eye. He copied the gesture, his knee pressing against hers. A cozy scene, one that she found surprisingly comfortable.

Dani began to do something she’d never imagined she could do. She opened up. “I’ve been thinking…”

Curiosity radiated from him like an aura. “About…?”

“You. Me.
Us
.” She offered him a weak smile. “I’ve come to a decision.”

His fingers brushed against her knee in a light caress. “Am I gonna like what you decided?”

“I hope so.”

“And do you think that in coming to this decision you might be trying to take back the control you think you lost?”

The question felt like a slap. “I’m not trying to take control, Nate. I’m not.”

He sat silently, his fingers still moving over her knee.

She wasn’t sure what to say, whether he was teasing her or goading her. The mischievous gleam in his eye told her he hadn’t meant the question to be cruel, but she was having a hard time trusting her own judgment.

“Let go, Dani,” his warm voice coaxed. “Just let go.”

“I am!”

Nate shook his head. “Don’t think. Don’t decide. Don’t—”

Dani tackled him to the sofa, kissing him before he could even finish. He’d wanted her to just let go? Then damn it, she was
really
going to just let go.

Wriggling around, he stretched out on the sofa as her body covered his. She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him with a ferocity that she couldn’t command. Everything about him had infected her, and she refused to control her desire any longer.

His growl made her bolder, and she swept her tongue into his mouth. He responded by returning the caress and wrapping his arms around her.

All she wanted was to get closer and closer. Closer still, to crawl inside him and never, ever leave.

*   *   *

The kiss was hot. Consuming. Nate returned her passion in equal measure, letting her know with his lips, his tongue, his hands, and his body that he wanted her.

Only her.

She pushed back, ending the kiss and rising over him, straddling his hips and staring at him with the most enchanting smile. As she started to take off his jacket, he sat up to help her, stealing another kiss as he opened each button, wanting their connection to never end.

He had a plan.

After Dani eased out of the jacket, she was about to toss it aside when Nate caught it. Moving quickly, he pulled the sleeves forward and tied them around her waist so her arms were pinned against her sides.

She glanced down at the restraint and then at him. “Nate?”

“Shhh.” He brushed his mouth over hers. “Let me play.”

A saucy smile formed on her lips. “So you like tying women up, do you?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never tried it before.” He threw his legs over the sofa and stood up, scooping her into his arms to take her with him. Then he laid her down on the couch.

Her eyes were shining when she looked up at him. “Now have you got me where you want me?”

“Close, but not quite.” He sat on the edge of the cushion and framed her face before he settled a gentle kiss on her lips.

When she tried to deepen the kiss, he eased back. “Nate! C’mon. Kiss me.”

“In due time. First, you need another lesson in surrendering your control.”

“Why does that make it sound like you’ve got something planned?”

“Because I do.”

Her eyes widened. “You mean you planned to tie me up?”

Since he demanded nothing but honesty from her, Nate gave her the same. He reached under the couch and pulled out the necktie he’d left under there when he’d planned out what he could do to give Dani more tutoring. “I did. Planned to use this, but your wearing my jacket only made it easier.”

The cadence of her breathing increased. “Does that mean you’re finally ready to make love?”

He shrugged, a truthful reply since he wasn’t at all sure if he was going to be able to resist her too much longer, especially now that she was so vulnerable. By not telling her exactly how much he wanted to carry her upstairs, he was trying to show her that she could enjoy herself without plotting or planning each little move she made.

“When will you—”

He silenced her question with a kiss. It took three kisses for her to finally stop asking. Only then did he reach for the first button on her blouse.

Fully expecting her to fight what he was doing, he grinned when she simply arched an eyebrow.

He answered the tacit question by leaning in to press his lips against the skin he’d just bared. Damn if his hands weren’t shaking when he opened the next button.

She squirmed. “I want to touch you.”

After he shook his head, he kissed her soft skin. Inhaling deeply, he breathed in her sexy scent and closed his eyes, savoring the desire that flowed through his veins like molten lava.

“Nate…”

His reply to her plea was to unfasten the next button, revealing the valley between her breasts, which he kissed and then licked.

“You’re killing me,” she said, her voice becoming a moan when he popped the next button open.

“Am I?” As he smoothed his fingers from her throat down her chest, he raised gooseflesh in his wake.

“Yes.” The word ended on a hiss when he grasped both of the open sides of her blouse and jerked them free of the tied jacket, baring her chest to him.

Nate buried his face in the swell of her breasts, trying hard to regain the self-control he almost lost. Seeing her in nothing but a lacy bra hit him harder than he’d thought possible. All he wanted to do was untie the jacket, rip off her shirt, and open the front clasp of her bra. His cock was as hard as rebar, and he feared he wouldn’t be able to leave her tonight, that the only end to the evening was with them in bed together.

But was it still too soon? This wasn’t about a short-term physical release; it was about getting past all of Dani’s defenses so she’d let him into her heart, not just her body.

He needed to get away from her while he still held tight to a thread of sanity. Pressing another kiss against the silky skin between her breasts, he found the strength to pull back. One by one, he buttoned up her blouse, wondering at how ridiculous his life had become. He was dressing the woman he wanted instead of trying to get her out of her clothes. The last thing he did was untie the jacket.