Friends and Lovers (17 page)

Nick stopped and stared at her. ‘The truth, Viv.’

‘I felt sorry for him. He was lonely and he’d had a tough life.’

‘Haven’t we all?’ said Nick sarcastically.

‘You never lost your sisters and brother and mother in the war!’ she said, flaring up. ‘You don’t have to make it sound like he was playing on my sympathy because he wasn’t! But I could see that he needed me in his life. All his family are gone, Nick. I’m all that’s left.’

He breathed deeply but several seconds passed before he said, ‘So he gave you a job and lavished presents on you, took you out – and you never breathed a word to me! Was your mother in on this?’

‘My mother? You’re joking! She tried to keep us apart. But she must have found out that I knew he came looking for me from Mr Kelly. That’s probably the miracle that caused them to break up.’

There was another silence before Nick said, ‘Why didn’t you tell me? Truth, Viv.’

‘I kept forgetting.’

‘Forgetting?’ He laughed. ‘Come off it. Something as important as that, and you forget to tell me?’

She frowned. ‘Are you calling me a liar, Nick?’

‘Too damn’ right I am! Why can’t you be honest with me and admit that you liked the attention? He’s the father figure you think you need and you
didn’t want me saying anything to spoil your little fantasy. He’s the sugar daddy who gives you all the sweeties you missed as a child.’

Suddenly Viv lost her temper. ‘That’s a lousy thing to say! You’re just bloody jealous! It’s not that you care about me being happy.’

‘That’s not true!’

‘Isn’t it? You just want to own me! To have me all to yourself.’

‘And what’s wrong with that?’ yelled Nick. ‘I love you!’

‘A fine way you have of showing it if you can call Stephen my sugar daddy,’ she snapped.

‘You should have told me about him. I thought we were close. I thought we had something special.’

‘So did I! But it appears I was wrong if you can’t understand why I need Stephen. I don’t think there’s any future for us any more, Nick.’

‘If you believe that then perhaps we’d better stop seeing each other?’

‘That suits me fine.’ She tugged at the emerald and diamond ring and held it out to him. ‘You’d better have this back.’

His face paled but he laughed as he took it. ‘It must be the shortest bloody engagement on record.’

‘I’m glad you can laugh about it.’ Her voice was icy.

Nick’s expression hardened. ‘Can’t you see – don’t you know – that if I didn’t laugh, I’d bloody
cry? And boys don’t cry, Viv, even when their world falls apart. They just have to pick themselves up. I thought you trusted me but it seems I made a mistake.’ Before she could answer he turned and walked away.

For several minutes she struggled with herself. Part of her wanted to run after Nick but the pain his words had inflicted kept her rooted to the spot. How could he believe that she wanted Stephen for a sugar daddy? How could he believe that she had deliberately not told him? How could he take back her ring? Her beautiful ring! Tears sparkled on her eyelashes. Her mother hadn’t even admired it.

Her mother … This was all
her
fault. Had she done it deliberately? Viv turned on her heel and ran back up the street. She burst into the house.

Hilda was pouring gin into a glass and some spilt as the door was flung open. ‘See what you’ve made me do,’ she snapped dabbing her frock with a handkerchief.

‘Serves you right,’ said Viv in a harsh voice. ‘I wish you’d drown in it.’

‘I see,’ said Hilda, her expression hardening. ‘The two of you have quarrelled and you’re blaming me?’

‘It
is
your fault!’ exploded Viv. ‘You acted like Nick was a selfish swine and then threw Uncle Steve in his face. I suppose Mr Kelly told you I went to see him?’

Her mother’s mouth tightened and her knuckles gleamed white as she nursed the glass to her bosom. ‘I shouldn’t have had to find out from
him
that my daughter was seeing an older man.’

‘He couldn’t have told you about the present and the job.’ Viv paced the room, unable to keep still. ‘You must have been to see Uncle Steve.’

Hilda gulped her drink. ‘Of course I went to see him. What did you expect?’

‘That’s exactly what I expected,’ said Viv, her eyes glinting. ‘You can’t bear anyone to take notice of me. You were jealous.’

‘I was not!’ Hilda took another gulp of gin. ‘What have I got to be jealous of where you and Steve are concerned? He thinks you’re just a child. He told me he’d taken you to the zoo.’

‘So? Lots of grown ups go to the zoo! You never took me as a girl. In fact you never took me anywhere worth mentioning.’

‘I could never afford it,’ said Hilda crossly.

‘You could afford to go dancing,’ flashed Viv. ‘When did you see him?’

Her mother shrugged. ‘A week or so ago. I can’t remember,’ she lied. ‘He was angry at first but eventually saw that I was only there in the role of your mother, because I cared. I didn’t want you getting hurt like you were the first time you went to see him.’

‘I don’t believe you,’ said Viv, her expression
scornful. ‘If you cared about me being hurt you would have been happy for me being engaged to Nick, but you only ever see your own point of view.’

Hilda placed the glass carefully on the table and said, ‘So I have a different point of view from yours. What’s wrong with that? What did Nick have to say about it all?’

‘He said I should have trusted him.’

‘Trusted him? That’s a funny, thing to say. I would have thought that he’d have said he didn’t trust you any more.’

Viv stared at her. ‘I see! All what’s happened was intentional. You really did want to split up Nick and me. Well, you should be feeling very happy because I’ve given him back his ring. Are you satisfied now you’ve ruined my life?’

‘Don’t be so melodramatic,’ Hilda said impatiently. ‘If he’s right for you, he’ll be back.’

‘No, not Nick,’ said Viv, a break in her voice. ‘We said too many things to hurt each other.’

‘Then there’ll be other boys,’ said Hilda, draining her glass. ‘You’re only seventeen! I was secretly engaged at your age, and broke it off. I reckon now I had a lucky escape.’

‘I’m not
you
, mother.’ Viv forced the words through her teeth. ‘Now I’m going upstairs to pack.’

‘Pack?’ Hilda was startled out of her assumed poise.

Viv paused in the doorway, her hand on the brass doorknob. ‘Yes, packing. I remember George saying the day he left that he could only ever remember that things happened when you were around. He’d forgotten that they were generally trouble with a capital T!’ She slammed the door and ran upstairs.

It did not take Viv long to pack and all the time she was expecting her mother to come upstairs to try and dissuade her. But Hilda did not come and even when Viv went downstairs her mother made no move to prevent her leaving, only staring
tight-lipped
at the television screen. Neither of them spoke as Viv opened the front door and closed it behind her.

Where should she go? It was only now that she had actually left that Viv considered where she could stay the night. Dot’s? No. Her friend would want to know everything and she wasn’t up to explaining. She hurt deep inside. Where then?

Uncle Steve’s house. The answer seemed to come from nowhere. It would be a slap in the face for her mother. That’s if she let her mother know. She thought of Stephen again. She would have to tell him the truth about Nick. Would he understand? She could only hope so.

She caught the bus at the corner of the road and headed for Stephen’s house.

‘You’ve what?’ Stephen stared down at Viv’s wan face as she stood before him, suitcase in one hand, a smiling rag doll he had given her in the other.

‘I’ve left home. I couldn’t bear living with Mam any longer. I know she’s visited you … interfering in my life! And now she’s caused trouble between me and Nick. So I’ve come to ask, can I live with you? You are family, after all.’

For a moment he was struck dumb, fearing what Hilda had told her about the pair of them. Then he realised that she could not have told Viv anything or she would hardly be standing on his doorstep. ‘Come in,’ he said. ‘You’d better explain everything.’

Relief flooded her face and he realised how unsure of her welcome she had been. ‘I didn’t think you’d let me down,’ she said, and dropping her suitcase she hugged him right there on the doorstep.

Stephen shot a frantic look across the road and over the fence. Then, picking up her suitcase, he pulled her indoors. ‘What’s this trouble she’s caused?’

Viv opened her mouth but he added hastily, ‘No. Don’t tell me yet. I’ll make a cup of tea first.’

‘Oh, good,’ she sighed and leant weakly against him. ‘I haven’t had a decent cup of tea all day and I feel shattered.’

He cast her an enquiring glance but remained silent, only ushering her into the lounge. ‘Are you hungry?’

She shook her head. ‘I don’t think I could eat a thing at the moment. Too much has happened today. It’s ruined my appetite.’

He felt sorry for her and eased her gently down into a chair. ‘You just sit quiet, Viv.’

‘You are a love, Uncle Steve,’ she murmured, and blew him a kiss before closing her eyes.

He felt a catch in his throat. She looked so young and vulnerable. What had Hilda been doing to her? He felt annoyed with the woman he had unburdened himself to about a threatened printers’ strike only a couple of days ago. She had been so prepared to listen, so soothing then. They had talked of how their life had been the last few years and then inevitably had made love. He’d known it was wrong but had been unable to resist her.

She had bought a red velvet full-length gown
with a plunging halter neck and ever since he had seen her in it he’d had trouble concentrating on his work. He had begun to believe he had judged her too harshly in the past. The war made them all behave in ways they would never normally have done. But now Viv had arrived on his doorstep and he was wondering whether Hilda was the woman he believed after all. He felt miserable as he went and made the tea, placing some chocolate marshmallows on a plate.

It wasn’t until Viv had drained her second cup of tea and eaten the last marshmallow that Stephen said, ‘What’s your mother done?’

Viv was silent a moment, her brown eyes fixed on his face as if determined to note his every reaction. ‘I know she came to see you last week because someone told her about me visiting you. I think she’s jealous of me having a life of my own and that’s why she didn’t want me to marry Nick.’

‘Nick?’ he said warily.

‘My boyfriend,’ she said quietly. ‘Or ex-boyfriend, should I say, thanks to Mam.’

‘What happened?’ She told him most of it.

‘Why didn’t you tell him about me?’ He felt slightly envious of Nick, having Viv’s love and an interesting job. At that age he had been in a hospital in the South of England, half out of his mind after being caught in an explosion in France.

Viv lowered her eyes and curled her feet beneath her. She could hardly tell him that she kept forgetting about him once in Nick’s company, so she improvised. ‘I thought you belonged to different parts of my life. I wasn’t sure you’d like each other so I just kept putting off talking to each of you about the other. I didn’t want to lose the love you both gave me. I was happy just as things were.’ Suddenly she realised as she spoke that some of what she was saying was true. ‘It was stupid of me,’ she said thoughtfully. ‘Because I knew the way things were going with Nick, you’d have to meet. I really was intending to tell you both about each other. It was just choosing the right moment.’ She cleared her throat. ‘You see, I love you both but in different ways. You do understand, don’t you, Uncle Steve?’

‘Yes.’ Stephen felt like laughing manically. Of course he understood the need to cling desperately to any chance of being loved. To be the important one in someone’s life! That’s why he was so touched by her words. ‘The green-eyed monster causes a lot of trouble,’ he murmured.

‘My ring had an emerald in it.’ The tears trickled slowly down her cheeks. ‘Oh, Uncle Steve, I feel so hurt inside.’

He caught her to him, wanting to comfort her. She was warm and soft in his arms and his warning system flashed red for danger, but he
could not reject her so stroked her hair as he would have soothed an animal in pain. ‘Poor Viv. I’m honoured you came to me. But women are better at this kind of thing, you know. Tea and sympathy and soft words.’

She lifted her head. ‘My mother’s a woman and she is no good at tea and sympathy at all! You’re much better. I knew I wasn’t wrong about you.’ She rested her head against his shoulder. ‘But I don’t want to cause you any trouble, Uncle Steve. If you don’t want me to stay, say so. I don’t want to be in your way.’

‘Of course you can stay.’ He put a tight lid on his misgivings. ‘But what if your mother comes looking for you?’

‘Looking for me?’ She lifted her head and there was pain in her eyes. ‘She won’t!’ Her voice was barely audible. ‘She doesn’t really care about me. But if she does come looking, don’t tell her I’m staying here. And if she asks how I’m coping in work just tell her I’m OK. That I can get along fine without her.’ She leant forward and kissed him on the lips.

He released her hurriedly and stammered like an idiot, ‘I’ll show you where you can sleep, Viv. The room’s in a bit of a mess and I’ll have to find you some sheets and things but it’ll do for now.’

‘Anything’ll do me!’ She sprang to her feet,
her expression much brighter. ‘A floor would do me! Did you know I slept in a camp bed in the back kitchen for months at Grandfather’s?’ She followed him upstairs, still talking. ‘Is it the large back room? I always liked it. When you were going to marry Aunt Flo, I …’ Her voice trailed off. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to remind you.’

‘It’s all right, Viv,’ he said firmly. ‘That’s all water under the bridge now.’ He held the door open for her to pass inside and pressed the light switch. ‘It was something we were just drifting into really,’ he added. ‘Some people do, you know. They don’t want to be alone.’

She looked about her and he did too, trying to visualise the room with its plain egg shell blue matt painted walls through her eyes. He thought, It isn’t really suitable for a girl. Some of his books were piled in a corner along with old magazines and his coin collection. The furniture was dark and heavy. There was a stuffed falcon that had been his uncle’s. Stephen had occupied the bedroom when he had come to live with
his
uncle after the war. Later he had been going to decorate it for George but had not bothered when his marriage plans had fallen apart. He watched Viv as she went over to the window.

‘I love this view,’ she said with a cheerfulness that he hoped was not assumed. ‘I have a teeny patch of garden in our backyard but this is the
real thing. A pity the apple blossom’s over. It looks so beautiful. I suppose you’ve put all your plants in.’ She paused. ‘I bet Mam will forget to water mine.’

‘I’ll remind her if she comes,’ he said quietly.

‘Thanks.’ She turned to face him with a smile fixed on her face. ‘I really won’t be any trouble. You’ll hardly know I’m here.’

‘I’m glad you are.’ What else could he say? ‘I’ll go and get the sheets and things.’ He left her staring out of the window over the darkening garden. The neighbours would talk but he would just have to grin and bear it. He had already told next door that she was his niece. He squared his shoulders. Viv needed him and that was all that mattered.

What else mattered, though, was what Hilda would say if she found out Viv was staying here. What did he do when she arrived on his doorstep, as she surely would in a few days’ time? ‘You’ll hardly know I’m here,’ Viv had said. How wrong she was! Did she have any idea at all what a quiet life he had lived until she and Hilda had reappeared on his scene? It would get rather noisy if Hilda discovered he had taken Viv in but he was not about to betray her. She needed time to work things out. Somehow he had to do something about his Saturday night with Hilda.