Friend-Zoned (26 page)

“
What exactly did he say
to her?” I ask.
Ghost replies, “I don’t know, Nik. She was wound up tight when I
got there. She had tears in her eyes.”
My heart clenches.
He looks uneasy as he continues, “That’s nothing compared to what
happened after he left. Your girl had a meltdown. Shaking like a
leaf, flushed, sweatin’ like a fountain, out of control panic
attack. Had to cool her down with an ice pack. Nat said a few
things to her I couldn’t hear but whatever she was saying seemed to
be working. They both ended up in tears.” He smirks. “Then Tina
gets the flowers, walks out of the store and throws it into
oncoming traffic. Beautiful, man.”
That is funny.
I just can’t bring myself to think about anything other than Tina
having a breakdown. This is why I got out of Chaos. It affects your
family. Now, I’m not even a part of the brotherhood anymore and
it’s still affecting my girl.
Nope. I don’t like it.
So many thoughts are running through my head. I ask, “You think
this is the last we see of Omarr?”
Ghost furrows his brow and responds, “They call him unpredictable
for a reason, brother. I just hope Tina didn’t diss him. He’ll take
it as a personal insult.”
Tina is sweet as pie. No way she dissed him.
I shake my head and point out, “This is Tina we’re talking about.
She hates confrontation. No way.”
Ghost nods his head in agreement.
So why do I still have a bad feeling?
***

My phone pings.
I check it and see I’ve received a text from Nik asking me if I’m
okay. He called a few times but I didn’t have it in me to pretend I
was.
I’m feeling a little better now. I’ve drowned my sorrows in coffee
and candy. I decide to go see him. I leave Nat in charge and she
waves me out the door.
Probably look
like death warmed over.
I walk into his office. Nik’s sitting behind his desk on the phone.
He spots me and his face softens. He waves me over. I reach him and
he pulls me down sideways onto his lap. He tucks me deeper into him
and continues to talk on the phone all the while rubbing my back
and planting whisper-soft kisses on the side of my head.
I’m suddenly relaxed. Nothing compares to this. Nik is my personal
form of stress relief.
My body becomes lax and I feel sleepy.
Nik ends his phone call, puts his phone on the desk and wraps me up
tight.
He asks, “You okay, baby?”
I nod into his chest. I don’t trust myself to speak. It’s been an
emotional day and I’ve been known to cry at the drop of a
hat.
I feel his breath on my ear as he sighs and continues to hold
me.
I decide to break the silence with, “Who’s Marcus?”
Nik’s body stiffens. And there it is. Not good.
He softens his body and explains, “Marcus was Omarr’s older
brother. He was killed years ago.”
I don’t believe that. There’s more to this and, gosh darn it, I
want to know.
I whisper, “How did he die, Nik?”
He sighs and tightens his hold on me as if he thinks I’m about to
go berserk.
He starts the story, “Marcus broke into our family home when I was
fifteen. He tried to get into my dad’s office to steal something.
Dad heard someone in the house. Dad shot Marcus and he died later
that night.”
I gasp and grip him tight. I’m not sure how I feel about
this.
Nik continues, “When the police arrived to take statements and
asked who took the first shot, I said it was me. Omarr thinks I
shot his brother dead. I was just a kid and protecting my dad,
babe. I got a suspended sentence and a few months later my dad was
dead. So it didn’t make any difference anyway. Omarr is a part of
the Sixes. Uncle Jerm leads them and he knows I didn’t do it.
That’s all that matters.”
I stay silent while I process this. It explains a lot of the
tension between Omarr and Nik. Maybe Omarr just wanted to use me to
get back at Nik.
“I’m sorry baby, this is all my fault,” he whispers on a shoulder
squeeze.
I whisper back, “No, it’s not. Your dad was protecting your family
and you were protecting your dad. I would do the same for my dad,
Nik. Really, I would.”
We don’t speak again. Just find solace in each other’s
embrace.
A few minutes pass and I yelp as my cell phone blasts ‘Little
Talks’ by Of Monsters and Men from my pocket.
I jump up, fish it out of my pocket and answer. “Hello Miss Molly,
everything okay?”
I’m shocked when I hear her sniffle. “Oh child. I tried to get him
down but I can’t reach him. And the blood…so much blood. He’s
tangled up. I can’t get to him. I’m so sorry, child.” She says this
all in a rush and it’s hard to decipher.
My heart races. I’m so confused. She sounds shaken and
distraught.
I coo, “Molly, tell me what happened. There’s blood. Someone’s
hurt?”
Nik jumps up and is by my side in a flash. He turns me to face him.
His face questioning. I shrug. Molly isn’t making any sense.
Molly splutters, “Bear, child. Bear is
dead.”
No.
***

I watch Tina’s body go
rigid and her face drains of color.
She whispers, “Okay, Molly. I’ll be home soon.” Her face is blank,
void of emotion and her eyes lose focus.
Tina has turned into a droid.
I wrap a hand around her waist, squeeze and ask softly,
“Sweetheart, what happened?”
She pulls my arms off of her slowly and stands there a moment
looking like she’s close to losing her mind.
Her eyes are empty. My Tina isn’t here right now.
I watch helplessly as her face shifts into a grimace, crumples, and
she bursts into tears.
I don’t do tears well but the first thing that comes to mind is
‘whoever made my girl cry is going to pay in a big way’. I pull her
into my arms and rock her while she cries.
She repeats softly, “He’s all I had left of her…” like a
mantra.
Tina cries for a while. I hold her tight and let her.
She stops crying after a few minutes and I ask her what happened
but Tina is vacant. The lights are on but she’s long left the
building. And I’m worried.
I call Nat, who closes down Safira and within minutes she’s in my
office. She asks if she can use the ‘chill out’ room for a while. I
approve. She asks for some alone time with Tina. I nod and return
to pace in my office.
Half hour passes and Nat comes into my office. Her eyes are puffy
and she whispers, “Bear’s dead.”
My face falls. Damn. I know Tina loved her cat but I’m unsure why
it caused this reaction.
Nat says, “There is more to this you don’t know. Bear wasn’t just
any cat. He belonged to someone Tina loved very much. He was all
she had left of that person and now he’s gone and Tina feels
disconnected.” My brow furrows. She continues quietly, “Tina
carries a lot of baggage. You’d never tell by looking at her now
but she’s had a tough time over the past five years. Be patient,
Nik. She’ll let you in, just treat her with care.”
I’m surprised.
Tina seems like the most together person I know. Finding out she’s
had it tough breaks my heart. I’m desperately curious now but I
won’t ask. It’s Tina’s story to tell.
I nod and say, “I’ll send Ghost over to the apartment to get
Bear.”
Nat nods and goes back to the ‘chill out’ room to be with
Tina.
My poor girl.
This was a bad day for her. I’d do anything to
make it better.
***

Ghost returns from Tina’s
apartment glowering.
Fuck me. This is not good.
He closes the door to my office and I know it’s worse than what I
thought.
He sits down putting a leg on his knee and shaking it. He says,
“Cat was decapitated.”
My body stiffens.
What the
fuck?
Ghost continues, “Body was
strung up by its tail on the back porch like a lantern. I spoke to
Nat. She knows. No way is she telling Tina. She mentioned that Tina
said some shit to Omarr. She dissed him. A few times. This looks
like a message to me, brother.”
It was. A very clear message that read
Don’t fuck with me
.
I nod. I only have one choice.
I have to kill Omarr.
***

For the first time in two
years, I closed Safira early. Nat called Mimi and told her not to
come in for her shift. I’ll still pay her, of course. It’s not her
fault I broke down today.
Nat drives me home in my car, she orders Chinese food but I can’t
stomach it. I just want to go to bed and pretend today didn’t
happen.
Bear is gone.
My only link to Mia is gone. And I know he went in a bad way
because no one will tell me about it. Nat told me Ghost picked him
up and took care of him.
I can see someone’s tried to clean blood off my back porch.
Thinking of Bear in pain makes me want to retch. He was the best
cat and a great companion. All those lonely nights felt okay as
long as Bear was purring around the place. The apartment feels
empty without him. I walk passed his food bowl. There will be no
feeding him tomorrow. I will never see his feed me dance again. Or
hear his sweet meow. Or cuddle him.
Nik asked me if I wanted to stay with him tonight but I refused. I
wouldn’t be great company and I’m thankful he didn’t push. The last
thing I need would be to get angry with him. I need space.
He got me.
Today was a really bad day. And I’m over
it.
Time to hit the
hay.
I excuse myself without eating
and kiss Nat on the cheek.
Finally, in my nice warm bed I’m allowed to feel whatever I should
be feeling.
I’m hurting. Real bad.
A silent sob takes over me. I thought I was passed days of feeling
like this. Like I don’t want to wake up tomorrow.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suicidal. Some days are just hard and
you want to go to sleep and wake up a week from now knowing the
problem is gone. Everyone feels like that once in a while.
Life can be overwhelming.
I sniffle and bury my face under my covers. I hear the door creak
and Nat hops into bed with me. She snuggles close and without a
word, we fall asleep.
***

“
WHAT THE FUCK?!” Nat
shrieks.
I jump up on my bed in a Kung Fu pose preparing to kick some ass.
My head is throbbing and my eyes sting from crying. I see a
shadowed outline of a person at the edge of the bed.
I throw myself onto the large individual’s back and put them in a
choke hold. My arms are shaking but it’s better than sitting around
waiting to be killed. Like Bear.
I yell out, “Call the cops!”
Natalie turns on the bedroom light and we both freeze.
Nik’s face is red and veins are popping out on his forehead. To top
it off, he’s dressed only in underwear.
I quickly loosen my arms but wrap my legs around his waist and hug
his shoulders.
I squeal, “Honey! What are you doing here?”
Still with me attached to him he doubles over to catch his
breath.
He puffs out, “I,”
puff
“came to see,”
huff
“if you’re okay.”
I look at the digital clock on my bedside which reads 1:46am.
I’m still in a state of shock.
I ask in disbelief, “At one forty six in the morning?”
He stands up and breathily replies, “Yeah. I didn’t think this
through, huh?”
Nat replies sternly, “Uh, no. No, Nik. You didn’t. You broke into
the apartment a few hours after someone broke in and killed Bear!
Not the smartest thing you’ve ever done.”
Nik nods and looks apologetic, “I’m sorry, guys. I couldn’t sleep
knowing Tina was upset. So rather than be up all night I came over,
and Ghost had a key made for me, by the way, and gave me the
security codes.”
That makes sense.
Ghost breaks into our apartment every other week. Why wouldn’t he
give out spare keys and security codes to the public?
I kiss Nik’s neck and whisper, “Thank you for thinking of me. Let’s
go to bed.”
Nik nods and looks at Nat as if expecting her to leave.
She shakes her head and says, “Nuh uh. You must be out of your mind
if you think I’m sleeping alone after that.”
I jump in the middle of the bed, my best friend climbs in on one
side and my boyfriend jumps in on the other.
You know what? Life isn’t so bad after
all.
Then I think about what just happened and burst out laughing.
The bed shakes as Nat and Nik laugh with me.
I don’t think we’ll get much sleep tonight.

Chapter Twenty-one
Naughty Nooner

I wake up a little before
the alarm is set to go off. I feel smothered.
I look to my left to see Nat has an arm on my belly and both her
legs tangled in mine.
Wait. One,
two, three, four, five, six legs.
I
look to my right and Nik is on his stomach, smooshed faced with his
legs also tangled in mine.
We’re a gigantic pretzel.
I try to wake Nik first. I pinch his nose closed but all this does
is make his smooshed lips flap and vibrate as he breathes heavier
out of his mouth.
I can’t stop the hysterical laughter that bursts out of me.
I’m so tired. My head and eyes hurt like a mother. Bear is gone but
I know he’s with my Mom and Mia. And I had the most uncomfortable
sleep. But at least I was surrounded by two of the most important
people in my life. And the way Nik sleeps is absolutely hilarious.
I’m running on empty and absolutely hyper.
Nat and Nik both awaken to my loopy laughter and snorts. They lift
their heads up and look at me like I’ve lost my mind. And,
truthfully, I think I might have.
Nik excuses himself to shower and change clothes. We spend the
morning getting ready for work. I ask Nik if he brought his car but
he said he came by cab because his car makes too much noise and he
didn’t want to wake Ceecee.
Once we’re ready we got out to my car. After I battle with her for
five minutes to please open for me, we squeeze into my baby. Nat
climbs through to the back so Nik can take the front seat.
I try the ignition.
Nothing.
Nat is already laughing. We go through this every morning. She
tells Nik I own a clown car.
I glower at her while I put my foot up onto Nik’s lap and kick the
passenger door while turning the ignition.
She starts.
Works every
time.
Nik looks like he’s not sure
whether to laugh or get the hell out of the car.
We’re on our way to work and Nat says, “Nik, turn on the
radio.”
He shakes his head and replies cynically, “I would but I’m scared
the roof might fly off.”
Nat and I burst into laughter. We laugh so much we both sob and
laugh at the same time.
By the time we get to work our moods have lightened.
Nat kisses Nik on the cheek before moving to open the store. Nik
stays behind with me and wraps his arms around my lower back.
He says ,“I’m so sorry yesterday was bad for you, sweetheart. I’ll
spend forever making it up to you.”
What?
I’m confused.
I ask, “What do you mean, honey?”
He answers on a squeeze. “Omarr. He’s my problem, not yours. I’ll
fix it. I promise.”
Sweet Lincoln’s
Mullet!
Nik blames himself for yesterday. I know
Bear’s death is Omarr’s doing. No one needed to tell me that. But
still, no one will tell me how and, quite frankly, I’m okay with
that. Some things are better left not knowing.
I pull back a little and hold his face in my hands. I say, “It’s
not your fault, honey. Don’t think that, not for a second. Omarr
killed Bear. Not you. He is a psychopath. Again, not your fault. He
can spend his life blaming the way he is on his brother’s death but
that only makes him a weak person. Not. Your. Fault. Got it?”
I see emotion flicker over his face. He puts his lips on mine and
whispers against them, “God, I love you.” Then he kisses me deeply.
I wrap my arms around his neck and stand on my tiptoes.
I pull away from the kiss and bury my face in his neck. I breathe
him in.
As long as I have Nik, nothing will ever seem that bad.
I whisper into his neck, “You make life better.”
His body stills a moment before he squeezes me.
I turn and walk without looking back.
Time for work.
***