Read Freddy Plays Football Online
Authors: Walter R. Brooks
“We'll have to put a stop to that,” said Freddy, and he went over to talk to Mr. Kurtz, who was walking grumpily off the field behind his team.
“Just a minute,” Freddy said, and, when the Tushville principal turned angrily on him, he said: “I just want to tell you: Mr. Boomschmidt, the circus man who comes through here every summer, is a friend of mine, and I am going to write and ask him to lend our team a couple of elephants and a lion, and maybe that rhinoceros, Jerry, for next year's game. I think,” he said, “that we'll be able to give you some pretty good competition.”
“Bah!” said Mr. Kurtz, and walked off. But that was the last anyone ever heard of the Tushville horses and the following year their team played straight football with the regular pupils, and both games were a tie.
Some days later a group of the animals were in the cow barn when Mrs. Bean brought a letter the mailman had left for Freddy. He read it slowly, and at the end looked up and said in a surprised tone: “What do you know! Why, his last name was easier to guess and commoner than his first name. It's Brown. Clarence Brown.”
“Clarence?” said Charles. “You mean old Doty?”
“Yes. Look, he says here: âI just want to tell you I'm sorry for all the trouble I gave those nice Bean people. I got a mean streak in me. I didn't really want to do them out of all their money, but I was hard up, and when Herb Garble wrote to me about itâ”
“Oh, fish feathers!” Jinx interrupted. “Sure, he's sorry, now he didn't get it. Sure, sure; so am I always sorry when I try to swipe something off the kitchen table and it don't come off.”
“Well, I don't know,” said Mrs. Wiggins. “He could really mean it. There were some nice things about him.”
“That's true,” said Freddy. “He tried to help me out several times. But he also tried to sideswipe me with his car one day, too. He and Garble were a pair. I hear Garble's left town for good.”
“It's for
our
good,” said Mrs. Wiggins. “But I kind of miss Doty, at that.”
“So do I,” said Freddy. “He was fun sometimes. And even when he wasn't, he made things plenty exciting. It does seem awfully quiet around here since he left. It would be nice to have a little excitement. Even my poetry seems sort of dull to me today.”
“You and me too,” said Jinx.
“I started one about the game,” said Freddy without paying any attention to the cat's remark.
Black Beard, the Tush villain
,
Came down to make a killin'
,
Came down with all his forces
,
Big men and big horses;
Came down with Mr. Kurtz
,
But Bill hit him where it hurts.
Black Beard, the Tush villain
,
Had a wife and two chillun'
,
Brought 'em down to see the game
,
Went back sore and lame;
Went back full of aches
,
Didn't have what it takes;
Went back badly beaten;
Off the mantelpiece he's eatin'.
Black Beard, the Tushâ
“Ho hum,” said Jinx. “Guess I'll go hunt me up a little excitement.”
Freddy looked up. Jinx was just going out of the door and otherwise, except for himself, the barn was empty.
“Darn it!” said Freddy. “Even when you write about
them
, they won't listen!”
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This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, events, and incidents either are the product of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Copyright © 1949 by Walter R. Brooks
ISBN: 978-1-4976-9223-7
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