Fractured & Formidable: The Sacred Hearts MC Book V (3 page)

“You were mine the minute you agreed to get on the back of
my bike and I’ve wanted you since the moment I first saw you. Never stopped
wanting you Red, nothing ever changed about that. I’ve been a neglectful son of
a bitch and I aim to fix that, starting now,” his lips touched mine and all
righteousness, all resistance drained from my body. I closed my eyes and let
him kiss me, powerless to stop him or resist but I felt a sudden and sure surge
of anger, of outrage at his audacity and that alone kept my lips in check, kept
me from kissing back. That didn’t seem to faze Zander in the slightest.

  He pressed against my body tighter and my mind just
switched off, just like watching a television screen go blank. I felt a heady
rush to my head and butterflies swirled in my stomach, and longingly my heart
reached back in time to a little over a year ago to the very first time Zander
kissed me. He murmured against my lips now, and my heart gave a painful twist
in my chest.

“Kiss me back, Sugar,” he murmured. I closed my eyes and
sucked in a tremulous breath, letting it escape in a shuddering sigh.

“I can’t,” I whispered and I felt him smile. I opened my
eyes and his were warm and smiling and so very close.

“Sure you can,” his voice was teasing and at once inviting
and I felt a deep dull throb of hurt in the center of my chest.

“And if I kiss you this time? What then? You kissed me last year,
gave me your number, said you wanted to see me and then left me sitting in that
restaurant all alone. I won’t have it Zander. I can’t…” his lips touched mine
again so very softly and I closed my eyes and fought not to kiss back but my
resolve was weakening and I think he could sense that. His tongue flicked out
and tasted my bottom lip and a soft whimper ran into the back of my teeth which
I had firmly clenched.

It was a low blow but I needed space, I needed to think and
so I blurted out softly, “Are you going to make me?” he withdrew to look into
my eyes and his brow wrinkled slightly in confusion.

I pressed on, “The way Shelly was forced?” I asked to make
my point clear. Zander recoiled like he’d been slapped. His warmth just gone
and I silently cursed my body for the bereft feeling it left me with, every
part of me except my brain beseeching him to come back, to hold me, to kiss me,
to touch me… I crossed my arms over my middle.

“I’d never do that to you Red, don’t even think it,” he
admonished and the guilt swamped me sevenfold. I nodded and tried to relearn
how to breathe, his departure had nearly stolen the breath from my lungs with
it. I shifted uncomfortably.

“I’m sorry. You were just… You… You make it hard to think
when you’re that close and it isn’t fair.” I swallowed hard and felt the blush
sweep up from my chest and go to the very roots of my hair. He smiled, his good
humor at my expense back again.

“Really?” he asked dryly. I shook my head and turned, my
hands were trembling as I tried to finish my task, the paper cups scratching
together loudly in the quiet kitchen as I stuffed them with the little
chocolates. I felt humiliated tears burn the backs of my eyes and I closed them
tightly and resolutely refused to let them gather any further let alone spill
over.

I could feel Zander at my back, his intense gaze sweeping
over me and he stood there. Finally I heard him sigh and the rustle of cloth
shifting as he put down his arms which he’d crossed.

“Hey, don’t do that, come here,” I heard him take a step
forward and I skirted around the counter out of reach. He cursed.

“Just give me a minute, just give me… God!” I hated how I
sounded on the verge of tears, voice high and tight, trembling with the sheer
force of will it took to force the rising tide down.

“Oh hey, Red no. Don’t do that, Sugar, don’t cry. I didn’t
want you to cry.”

He was on me before I could step away, right up in my
personal space all over again, his arms went around my waist and he pulled me
tightly against him and I couldn’t resist this time, my hands slid over the
smooth skin of his arms, which were solid, my palms coming to rest just below
his shoulders. He palmed my ass with one hand and I couldn’t even find the will
to be indignant. He pulled my forehead down to his with his other hand and
simply rested them together.

“Shh, shh, shh… It’s okay,” I sniffed. No tears yet, but
they were trying. This was so confusing! What was he
doing
here? A fine
question, so I asked.

“What do you
want
Zander? What are you doing here?” I
demanded and held myself ridged in his embrace.

“Thought I already told you, Baby. I want
you
, I’m
here for
you.
”

I scoffed and wrenched myself out of his grasp. ”Well people
in Hell want ice water too!” I said dispassionately, “You had your chance last
year, you chose not to show up or return my calls!” He looked a mix between
hurt and angry and that was rich, that was rich indeed.

“When was the last time you ate anything?” he asked and the
change in conversation was so abrupt I could swear I heard the sound of the
needle abruptly being pulled across the vinyl record’s surface. I frowned.

“What?”

“Food, Red. When was the last time you had a meal?”

I blinked and frowned and thought about it before replying, “Breakfast
I think. I don’t know, I don’t remember eating lunch, I’ve been busy.” I rolled
my lips together, smoothing them against each other. The ghost of his lips
grazing mine still there, a slight glimmer of touch even though it’d been minutes
since his lips moved on mine.  

“Okay. That’s too long. Finish up, I’ll take you to dinner,”
he said gently. I shook my head.

“I’m done and I’m going home, I’ll fix something when I get
there.”

He gave me that adorable grin, complete with those boyish
dimples and with that damned chipped tooth it made my insides melt, faster than
milk chocolate in the double boiler.

“I’m taking you out. I believe I promised you dinner,” he
said and I stared at the ceiling and counted to ten.

“You promised me dinner
last year
. It’s been
over
a
year now! And just how do you know I’m not seeing anyone anyways?” I narrowed
my eyes in suspicion.

“Asked your roomies,” he said with a one shouldered shrug.

I made an incredulous noise. I packed up the chocolates I’d
been working on and put everything in its place. Zander leaned a hip against
the counter, arms crossed over his chest, gaze following my every movement.

I hung my apron on its hook by the walk-in and smoothed my
mint green sweater into place over my hips. I brought down the sleeves from
where I had them rucked back over my elbows and tugged up on my riding boots
over my dark jean leggings. Zander watched all of this, his smile slowly
fading, his gaze becoming molten, liquid with heat. I gathered my purse and
keys from beneath the front counter and snapped off all the lights. We’d long
since been closed.

Zander followed me as I went through all of these motions,
watching from a safe distance. I ushered him out the front door and set the
alarm before dashing out and locking up. The parking lot was empty except for
my little blue Ford Focus and a beautiful cherry red and white muscle car. I
stopped in my tracks and stared at it. It was like something out of a magazine.
My father would have appreciated it very much. He was an old car guy, though I
couldn’t tell you what kind I was looking at without reading where the model
was on the back.

“What do you think? Want to go for a ride?” Zander asked and
that sexy as sin grin of his was back.

“It’s yours?” I asked.

“Mm hmm, restored her myself,” he buried his hands in his
pockets, “So how about a ride Red?” he asked and I shook my head.

“Not tonight, I’m exhausted.” It was true, my day had
thoroughly caught up with me and now that he’d mentioned it I was ravenous! I
wanted to go home, eat something and go directly to bed.

“Okay, Sugar. You win this time,” he said and I blinked. I’d
been staring into space. I colored faintly and shivered in the cool night air.
I hadn’t worn a jacket this morning. I unlocked my car with the little key fob,
my corner lights flashing bright into the night. Zander opened my door before I
could get around and reach for it myself. He held it for me. I got into the car
and he leaned in, I held myself stiff. He looked me over and smiled.

“May have won this battle but you haven’t won the war,” he
said softly and kissed me again and
oh God
I liked the feel of his lips
on mine. Had missed it so much. I think he knew it too because he pulled back,
even though I hadn’t kissed him back, his eyes sparkling.

“I’m glad you like it when I kiss you,” he remarked as if he’d
read my mind.

I frowned, “Who says I do?”

He grinned from inches away.

“You may not kiss me back, but you don’t pull away either,”
he murmured and backed out of the door, shutting it firmly on the inarticulate
sound of protest that escaped me. I blinked at him and he stood smiling, a few
paces away. I realized he wasn’t leaving until I pulled out and was underway
and so I started my car. He waved at me in my headlights and grinding my teeth
with frustration I pulled out onto the road and made my way home.

He’d conceded that I’d won tonight so why did I feel like I
was on the losing side of things? I sighed. That should be obvious… I wanted
him a year ago and I wanted him now, I just wasn’t sure I could trust that he
wouldn’t pull a Houdini on me again.

Revelator…

I’d let her go the night before and thought about our entire
exchange. She had been stiff and unyielding in my grasp, but she not once
fought me or tried to shove me away. I’d shot a text to Dray telling him to
make sure she ate when she got home. He’d shot a text back asking if he looked
like her fucking babysitter. Geeky as fucking hell but I’d texted back ‘
..I.,
’
at him.

I got a text from Everett about twenty minutes later of a
sneaky candid photo of Red at their dining room table, a large salad in front
of her, her cute freckled nose buried in an e-reader as she ate. I asked
Everett what she was reading and got a text back exclaiming “I don’t fucking
know! Why don’t you come over here and ask her? Stalker status much?”  Okay
yeah, point taken.

I went home and hit my home gym to clear my head and work
off my arousal. She smelled so fucking amazing. Her soft curves yielding
against me when I’d held her close. Her body warm and supple and perfect, lips
like fucking silk… I’d abandoned the effort pretty quickly and breathless went
for an icy shower instead. Not my favorite way to wrap up my evening.

The next day started with training, then a quick shower
followed by a whole lot of time working my ass off at the clubhouse putting in
insulation and putting up drywall. I took myself off to my club room and
cleaned up and found Ghosty looking as lost in thought as I’d ever fucking seen
him, chillin’ at the bar nursing a beer.

“Ghosty! What you thinking about man?” I asked.

“The usual. The past, women…” Dude sighed hard.

“You need to think about something else,” I pulled a bottle
of water out from behind the bar, leaning way over to do it.

“Got a lot on my plate at the moment. Life is at another
crossroads,” he said and didn’t sound entirely happy about it.

“This about Shelly?” I asked.

“Some of it, some of it’s about me too.”

“Shit, you’re doing some real deep thinking over here ain’t
you?” I cracked the seal on my bottle and downed it, crushing it and recapping
and reached for another.

“Uh yeah.” He nodded.

“Lay it on me,” I said and grinned.

“Was gonna take Shelly up into the hills to do something
special for her. Take her to see something I know she’ll like,” he said but
sounded thoughtful.

“What that meteor shower thing?” I asked. Happened around
here every year but typically it was overcast and hidden, this year it was
supposed to be clear.

“Yeah, but I’m thinking I need to do something on a bit of a
grander scale.”

“Oh yeah? What did you have in mind?” I asked.

 “I have an idea, but I’m going to need some help and maybe
a woman’s touch.”

“You can count me in on the heavy lifting but if it’s a
woman’s touch you’re wanting you should try one of them hookers over there.” I
gestured with my bottle of water at some of the chicks that hung around the
club over in the corner but I was really only half assing it, suggesting it as
a joke. They may be easy pussy but for something like Ghost was talking about,
he needed someone with class and we both knew who that was.

“I think I’ll ask Hayden but I’m still going to need your
help,” he said. I grinned. Yep, that was the particular female I’d been
thinking about too.

“As long as it doesn’t cut in to my training.” I shrugged
and crushed my second bottle of water and wished that it was a beer. No alcohol
while training. I could drink plenty
after
a fight but it was right back
to training the next morning, hangover or not.

“Got a fight coming up?” He asked me.

“Next month, bottom tier but I should work my way up fast.”
I grinned, and it wasn’t entirely friendly.

“Feel sorry for the poor bastard,” he said and I clapped him
on the back, hard, pretty much just to be a dick. We chilled for a bit and shot
the shit about some other miscellaneous boring crap before he got up to go.

“See you around man,” he said and we clasped hands.

He left and I looked after him for a minute. His mind was
worlds away and it showed. I knew the feeling. Mine was pretty much on Red
constantly now that I’d finally committed to fucking doing something about
making her mine. I looked at the clock. They closed up at a regular hour on
Saturdays. Red had Sundays and Mondays off. It was getting to be that time and
so I heaved myself off the bar stool and straightened my cut, going for the
door. Dray fell into step beside me.

“Going to get Everett?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“I’m headed that direction too.” He stopped and I stopped
with him, he eyed me speculatively.

“Look, I get why you did what you did back in the beginning
there with my girl’s best girl, but did you really have to be a dick about it?”
he asked. I frowned.

“Yeah I fucked that one up big time, didn’t I?” I asked with
a heavy sigh.

“Yah think!?”

“Dragon called and I got to doin’ what needed doin’ and
honestly, that’s no fuckin’ excuse, I forgot all about those damned dinner
plans.”

Dray scowled, “Yeah well she’s a chick and you know how
that
goes. It hurt her
feelings
. Mandy ain’t used to dudes takin’ an interest.
The way my girl tells it, she was kind of stuck with the stigma of being the
preacher’s daughter all through high school. Dudes just took her at face value
of being some kind of prude. She didn’t get much action if any, only a few
dates here and there and mostly on a kind of Em. She’s shy, which doesn’t help
much. So you not showing up, it cut way deep.” I looked at my VP like he grew
some kind of second head.

Red not getting any play was kind of a total fucking foreign
concept to me. The girl was fucking gorgeous! I figured she’d be beating dudes
off with a stick, which truthfully was part of the reason I steered clear so
hard. I figured she deserved better ‘n me by a mile, especially since I didn’t
have any time to give her. I just
really
didn’t want to see her with
anyone else. Mostly because I would’ve probably beat the motherfucking brakes
off of any dude who tried. I thought I’d been some kind of blessed when she’d
steered clear of the club, but hind sight was always fucking 20/20.

“Fuck me! She steered clear of the club because she didn’t
want to see me didn’t she?” I asked. Dray looked at me like I was some kind of
moron.

“You think!?” I scowled and he nodded.

“Then she just plain got busy with making her chocolates and
getting shit straight with the business. She spent forever in the kitchen getting
shit right with her grand folk’s recipes; doing the math to do big and bigger
batches. We got her moved in and I don’t think she left the house but once or
twice in the whole first month, well except for those damned Sunday dinners
with her folks.” It was his turn to scowl and it leapt out at me.

“What’s that look for man?” I asked.

“Not sure what’s up but she goes to her parents and comes
back quiet as a mouse. No smiles, no laughing, as reserved as I ever seen her.
Think her pops is real over bearing or something.” He looked troubled like he
thought there was more to it than that and I nodded.

“What’s Irish say?” I asked.

“That’s just it, Em won’t say anything. She ain’t happy
about whatever it is though. I can tell you that much.” I nodded, thinking
about it.

“Think I can get a free pass on Church tonight?” I asked.
Dray raised both his eyebrows and looked back towards the club house. He looked
me over and looked thoughtful for a minute.

“Yeah man. I’ll see what I can do. The Pres. is in with
Data, hot ‘n heavy. Something’s up, just don’t know what it is yet. I take it
whatever you got planned has to do with Mandy?” I nodded.

“Yeah, I wanna spend time with her.”

Dray nodded saying, “Typical Saturday night for her is spent
with her nose in a book or watching some TV. She’s a real homebody that one.
Come by the house. She’s sure to be there.”

I nodded, a plan formulating.

“Good deal, be by in an hour or two,” I said. Dray nodded
and went for his Trans-Am while I went for my Chevelle.

If Mandy wouldn’t come out and have dinner with me, I’d
bring dinner to her. I wasn’t no master chef by any means but I knew my way
around anything meat, and how hard was it to make salad? I headed out towards
Dray’s place and stopped in at the market closest to it. I found some real lean
steaks and some fancy premade mushroom caps. I bought a bunch of shit for
salad, some bottled water and I figured I could deviate just a
little
and picked up a six pack of my favorite beer.

I drove out to Dray’s with two grocery bags full of shit sitting
shotgun, feeling pretty good about myself. I pulled up to the curb across the
street from his place and jogged over the two lanes of asphalt, a bag of
groceries in each arm. He opened the front door as I leapt the front steps in
two big strides.

“She just got in the shower. We’re heading out,” he said. I
nodded.

“Good deal, thanks man.” Everett looked at the bags and then
to me dubiously.

“Good luck, Mandy tells you to get out you better get. She
calls me and I’m coming back here.” She gave me a baleful look.

“Not going to preemptively kick my ass out?” I asked and
grinned, she shook her head.

“I told you I wasn’t dissuading you, but I’m not helping you
either. What you two do is Mandy’s business until she makes it my business,”
Everett said and gave me a pointed look.

“You hurt her again and it’s my business. Got it?” I nodded.

“Yes Ma’am!” Dray hooked an arm around his woman’s shoulders
and pulled her into his side. They went out the door and I kicked it shut
behind them. It took everything that was in me to go to the kitchen and cook,
rather than set the shit down and go for the bathroom to join her in there. I
think I showed some pretty remarkable restraint.

I started doing my thing, my heart doing a little leap in my
chest when the water shut off. I wanted to see her so damned bad. To make
everything up to her. I studiously kept cooking. The steaks were seasoned and
the broiler was on. The mushroom caps stuffed with all sorts of good stuff were
in there and I was nearly done with the salad when the door opened. I heard her
give a gusty sigh.

I replaced the mushrooms with the steaks and called out, “Hope
you aren’t comin’ out here naked. You are and I’m not sure my self-control will
take it.”

I figured it was only fair warning her I was here seeing as
I’d snuck up on her last night, which hadn’t exactly gone the way I’d had it
mapped out in my head.

Mandy slowly crept into view in this deep, forest green,
silk robe with these golden-orange flame colored leaves around the bottom and
edging the sleeves. Her red hair was twisted up into a knot and carefully
pinned at the nape of her neck. She was fuckin’ heart stopping.

“What are you doing?” she asked. She was a whiter shade of
pale, freckles standing out and her face was fresh and clean without makeup. Her
autumn eyes seemed larger somehow without all that crap around them. Not to say
that she did her makeup badly, she did awesome, but I really liked her this way
too.

“You wouldn’t have dinner with me last night,” I said.

“Where’s Dray and Evy?” she asked.

“Club.”

“Did they let you in here?”

“Yeah.”

“What are you doing?” she frowned.

“You already asked me that and the answer is I’m making you
dinner.”

“Why?” she asked.

“Because I really want to make it up to you Red,” I said
gently and she softened a bit.

“Give me a minute to get dressed,” she murmured.

“No need,” I told her and shrugged, using the back of the
knife to scrape the chopped veggies into the salad bowl.

“I beg your pardon?” she looked affronted and I couldn’t
help but chuckle. Man, I sure knew how to put my foot in my mouth when it came
to her.

“You just got home from work and you should stay
comfortable,” I gesticulated with the chopping knife, “‘sides, I like this.
Looks good on you.” She blushed a deep crimson and with the green robe it
suddenly looked like Christmas. I grinned.

“I should probably find something more modest,” she
stammered. I set the knife down with a scrape and a clack and leaned both hands
against the kitchen counter and stared her down hard.

“Why?” I asked her.

“I, um… It’s not proper…” I stopped her stammering by coming
around the counter.

“By whose standards?” I asked.

“I, uh… societies?” she murmured. I stalked towards her and
she backed into the wall.

“Society in here?” I asked.

“No…”

“Then stop fuckin’ worrying about it and relax.”

“Kind of hard to do when you’re invading my space and intimidating
the heck out of me!” she blurted and clapped both hands over her mouth. She
looked fuckin’ terrified for a split second and I was just inside arms reach by
now. I grasped her gently by the hips and stepped in the rest of the way,
looking up the few inches into her lovely eyes which fixated on my mouth. She
wouldn’t make eye contact, but that was okay.

“You want me to kiss you Red?” I asked. She lowered her
hands, startled.

“What? No! Um, why would you ask me that?” She looked a
little lost, like her poor mind was a little on overload.

“You’re staring at my mouth,” I said. Her eyes snapped to
mine widening.

“I’m sorr-!“ she didn’t get to finish. I brought her mouth
down to mine and kissed her softly, and this time I think she forgot because it
was as sweet as the fucking first time.

Her lips parted with very little urging and I cradled her
against me, my tongue plunging past her teeth into her sweet hot mouth. She
gave this little moan, her eyes slipping shut and I went from zero to rock hard
in my jeans in point zero three seconds flat. Too soon she came to her senses
and jerked back, her lips slightly reddened from my kiss and I smirked.