Fractured Beat (Meltdown Book 1) (23 page)

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Authors: RB Hilliard

Tags: #Fiction, #Romance

BOOK: Fractured Beat (Meltdown Book 1)
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Mallory let out a long breathy moan and, like a switch, I was back in the moment and thinking clearly again. Sex as a whole was amazing, but this…this was something else. The wide-eyed look on her face as she stared up at me told me she felt it too.

“You feel that?” I asked.

“God yes,” she panted.

With each thrust I gave her a piece of me and in return I gained a piece of her. When her walls squeezed down on my cock I knew I wasn’t going to last much longer.

“Grant,” she moaned for the third time, and I almost let go.

“Tell me what you need,” I said between strokes.

She shook her head back and forth against the pillow and gasped, “I don’t know. It’s too much, too much.”

“Let go. I’ve got you,” I growled. This time when she screamed my name I was right there with her.

If I wasn’t sure before, I was now. Mallory Scott was mine.

Chapter Eighteen

About As Real As It Gets

Mallory

A
s the most
mind numbing orgasm I’d ever experienced in my entire life blasted through my body, I shouted Grant’s name. Satisfied beyond my wildest dreams, I melted into the bed, a complete and total puddle of mush. Then it hit me. I’d just done the one thing I was forbidden to do. I’d slept with my client. Grant collapsed on top of me and I wanted to put my arms around him and never let go. I wanted to but I couldn’t. I couldn’t because I was frozen in the wake of my stupidity. Grant’s weight shifted as he lifted up into a partial push up and I closed my eyes. The old Mallory would be reveling in the fact that she’d bagged Grant Hardy. She’d see him as a challenge and not the man who’d stolen her heart.
Never that.

“Be right back.” He gave me a quick peck on the lips before vaulting off the bed and escaping in the direction of the bathroom. I stared at his perfect body as he walked away and fought the urge to weep. Grant had seen me at my most vulnerable tonight. As I lay there, a raw, exposed heap of bitterness, crying for what I’d lost, he’d swept in and saved me. No one had ever saved me before. I didn’t think it was possible.

Minutes later he strode back in with a gorgeous grin on his face and crawled into bed beside me. I tried not to stiffen when I felt his lips graze the back of my neck.

“Mallory,” he said with a sigh of frustration.

“We shouldn’t have done that,” I whispered. Before I could get another word out I was flat on my back with him hovering over me like an angry storm cloud.

“Why?”

“For one I’m your counselor. Two, I could lose my job. Three, it isn’t real.”

“What isn’t real?” he snapped.

“This!” I hissed, when what I really wanted to do was shout. I wanted to scream at the unfairness of the situation.

“Oh baby, this was very real.” The hurt behind his smile made me feel horrible. It also solidified the fact that we’d gone too far.

I pushed against his chest but he didn’t budge. “I’m not kidding, Grant. I can’t lose my job.” He stared down at me and I wondered what would happen if I just gave in. Would it be so bad?

“You won’t lose your job.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Is the fear of losing your job the only thing holding you back?” he countered.

Yes, that and you discovering the truth about me
. “The first year is a probationary period. If I lose a client during that time I will have to repeat the last six months of training and answer phones before I’m allowed to try again,” I explained.

His mouth turned up into a cocky grin and my heart melted. “You won’t lose your job, I promise.”

“But if Kirkland finds out –” His body froze when I mentioned Kirkland’s name and I swallowed the rest of my sentence.

“Fuck Kirkland,” he gritted out. The he flipped onto his back and stared up at the ceiling.

“What’s going on?” I quietly asked.

He turned his head and I could see the turmoil in his eyes. “Kirkland won’t touch you, I swear it.” Flipping back to his side he ran his fingers across my cheek. “No regrets, Mallory. Let me hear you say it.”

“Grant –”

“Say it,” he commanded. The man was so hard to resist. “Say. It,” he slowly repeated.

I closed my eyes and, against my better judgment, said, “No regrets.” When I opened them back up he was staring down at me with a smile on his face.

Has anyone ever told you that you’re worthy of a song?”

Evidently I’d hit a nerve when I mentioned Kirkland. I wanted Grant to talk but clearly challenging him wasn’t the right way to go about it. His fingers traced a line from my cheek to my neck. When they reached my waist I snatched his wandering hand and held it in front of my face. “Why tattoo only half of your body?”

“Because I have yet to find the inspiration for the second half. Who knows, maybe I’ve finally found it?” His sexy tone plus the way he was looking at me had me aching for more. Dropping his hand I reached over and traced my fingers across the guitar on his chest. It was white with a black center and red etching. “I started taking lessons when I was eight years old. At first, I hated lessons. I thought they were pointless and just an excuse for my parents to get rid of me for an hour every Saturday morning. Once I could play, though, I grew to love them,” he explained. On his shoulder sat an ornate skull. The letters D and N sat in place of the eyes. I traced my fingers over the letters. “Dale Nelson was the best musician I’ve ever known.”

“He was your drummer before Chaz, right?”

“He was.”

“What happened?”

“He had a drug problem. We ignored it. By the time we figured it out, he was too far gone. If I had been less self-absorbed I could have prevented his death.”

“You can only save someone who wants to be saved and even then it doesn’t always work.”

His lips grazed across my shoulder and I shivered. “Did you want to be saved?”

“I think deep down everyone wants to be saved, even when they don’t.” Turning on my side to face him I pulled the covers up over us and asked, “Tell me about
Never the Same
.”

A sad smile appeared on his face. My heart dipped when he ran his fingers gently across my cheek and asked, “What would you like to know?”

“I’ve never heard it before. It was…sad. Did you write it?”

“It made you cry.” I glanced away in embarrassment. I’d cried more in the past few weeks than in the past several years, and all in front of Grant. Pressing his fingers to my chin he lured me back into his amber stare. Then he told me what happened with both Dale and Nash’s mother.

“So, it’s about letting go?” I asked, once he’d finished.

“Death and disease are two things that change you as a person. Watching Dale destroy himself had a profound effect on all of us, but especially Luke. The same goes for Nash and his mother. She’s all he has and he’s being forced to watch her slowly die. At what point do you throw in the towel? Do you give up or do you keep fighting? Sometimes you have to know when to let go.”

“Why Luke?”

“Luke and Dale were tight. Luke did everything he could to save Dale. In truth, I don’t think Dale wanted to be saved.” I felt bad for Luke. I felt bad for all of them. I’d stood on both sides of that coin and was so thankful I’d survived.

“Are you and Nash okay?”

“Why do you ask?”

“Because you are best friends who barely talk which, by the way, is strange.”

He shrugged. “Nash should have believed me. We both were there every step of the way with Dale. Nash knew how much I hated what happened and how much I blamed myself. Yet, when it came to me, he couldn’t look past the surface. He wouldn’t even listen to what I was telling him. I’m the first to admit it looked damning but if it had been me in his shoes, I would have at least listened to what he had to say.”

“Are you still mad at him?”

“No, yes,” he rolled onto his back and sighed, “I don’t know. Can we please not talk about this anymore?”

Not willing to let it go quite yet, I said, “Nash regrets not believing you.”

“I know he does.”

“But you’re not ready to forgive him yet?”

“He should have believed me.”

“You’re right, he should have,” I agreed.

“Luke should have believed me, too.”

“And Chaz?” I asked.

“It’s not the same with Chaz. Chaz wasn’t with us from the beginning. He didn’t go through hell with Dale. He’s a great drummer but the guy seriously needs to chill.” I did not disagree. “Speaking of Chaz, what happened in your hotel room, Mallory?” My laughter turned to a muted squeal when he flipped over and captured my mouth in a dominatingly delicious kiss. “Tell me nothing happened,” he whispered against my lips.

“Nothing happened.”

He pulled back so he could see my eyes. “Promise?”

“You shouldn’t have left me with him.”

“I know. I was so damned mad I couldn’t see straight. I sat in my dark hotel room drinking myself into oblivion and torturing myself with images of Chaz doing very bad things to you…things I could have been doing had I stayed. By the time Nash and Luke showed up with the girls I was angry and drunk.” His words sank in and I remembered Chelle and the half dress she was wearing. Clearly something happened, but with Grant or one of the other guys? As if sensing my sudden change in mood, he frowned. “What?”

“You keep mentioning Chaz, but what about Chelle?” A weary look stole across his face and I tensed beneath him.

“What about her?” he asked.

“Umm, how did you meet her?”
Do you love her? Are you still sleeping with her?

A sly smile spread slowly across his face. “What do you really want to know, my Mallory?”

Hearing him call me his Mallory did funny things to my heart. I thought about what to ask and decided to go for honesty. “Did you sleep with her that night? Are you still sleeping with her?” His eyes flared with humor and I turned my head to the side in embarrassment. Of course he was sleeping with her. What a stupid question.

“Look at me,” he coaxed.

I shook my head, no. His hand squeezed my face and my eyes shot to his. “No, I didn’t sleep with her. I’m sleeping with you, and only you. Now tell me, what happened with Chaz?”

Deciding fair was fair, I said, “Chaz stayed for a maximum of fifteen minutes. I’m pretty sure the only reason he was there in the first place was that he wanted to make you jealous.” The minute I said it I wanted to take it back. Chaz was his friend and I needed to keep my opinions to myself. “Let’s not talk about this anymore.”

“What would you like to talk about? How about this?” He tilted his hips and I felt his erection straining against my hip. My pulse shot through the roof. His eyes darkened with lust. “Or even better, let’s talk about us.”

“What about us?” I breathily asked.

“I want you, Mallory Scott. I want to do dirty things to you. If I promise you won’t lose your job, will you let me do dirty things to you?” I wanted to give in and throw caution to the wind, but it was so much more than my job at risk here. It was also my heart.

“How about this, you can do dirty things to me right now. Anything after we’ll just have to see about.” I could tell by his expression he didn’t like my answer, yet he was smart enough not to argue. Evidently he’d been holding back, because when he kissed me this time he poured everything into it and God, was it brilliant. He tore his mouth from mine and flipped me onto my stomach. I didn’t even have time to protest before he lifted my hair and stroked his tongue across the back of my neck. Chills coursed through my body and pooled between my legs. My breasts ached for his touch but I was trapped on my stomach. My protest dissolved into a gasp when I felt his fingers right where I wanted them. He played for a second and then pulled them away. I whimpered underneath him. I wanted more. When he failed to comply, I bucked my hips and gasped when he slid his very prominent erection between the cheeks of my ass. A cry of fear mixed with lust escaped from my lips as he rocked his hips up and down the crack of my ass, not exactly penetrating, but more like grazing. I’d never felt anything like it. It was wrong, dirty, totally taboo, but damn if it didn’t feel like heaven.

“Has anyone ever touched you like this?” he whispered into my ear.

“No,” I panted, and groaned when I felt his fingers dip inside me. When he pulled them out and rubbed my juices all over his erection, I thought I would explode right then and there. He resumed his assault and I felt like I was going mad with desire. The friction was electric, the motion tantalizing. I was on the verge of an orgasm but needed more, wanted more, had to have… more. Finally, not able to stand the buildup any longer, I lifted my head and breathed, “More.” Without missing a beat he slid his hand under me and strummed his fingers across my clit. All the while he kept perfect rhythm against my ass. Pleasure sizzled up my spine and I whimpered from its intensity. His fingers sped up and suddenly it was too much. I screamed as the orgasm blazed through me. I heard a guttural growl behind me and felt spurts of warmth hit my back as he bathed me with his semen. We both lay there for the longest time, me in a daze and him breathing heavily against my side. I felt him kiss my shoulder and turned to see his gorgeous ass as he bent over to grab his t-shirt from the floor. Once he had my back cleaned off, he flipped me over and smiled down at me. I blinked up at him.

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