Four Seconds to Lose (26 page)

“That’s very . . .” my voice drifts as I search for the right word, “. . . noble.”

“It’s more like compensating,” he says quietly, taking another small sip as he holds my gaze carefully, as if he can see me processing his vague words.

Compensating for things he has done in his past? So Cain isn’t perfect. I wonder what he’s done that’s so bad. I wonder if it’s as bad as what I’ve done. What if it’s worse? Would I forgive him if I found out he was a rapist or a murderer? Is that worse than trafficking deadly drugs, ruining lives?

Is it the same?

Who decides?

Resting his elbows on the table and leaning in closer to me, he asks quietly, “Do you want to talk about what happened between us and what it means?”

I hadn’t expected him to bring it up so abruptly and boldly. Stalling with a long, slow sip of my wine, I finally manage to get out, “Are you always so direct?”

That earns a sheepish smile. “I don’t do small talk well.” His finger trails around the rim of his glass. “It seems like a waste of time.”

“It can be,” I agree. In the case of Cain and me, this couldn’t be more true. There is a clock ticking for us and it is going to stop.

Tomorrow.

Will it bother Cain when I leave? Will he be upset with me if I don’t say goodbye? Should I tell him? Maybe I should let him know that I won’t be around much longer, so he knows this can’t turn into anything—

“Cain! What a pleasant surprise.” The female voice next to our table catches me completely off guard and I let out an exhale, not realizing I had been holding my breath. I turn to find a tall redheaded woman with shiny pink lips and creamy skin standing next to us, her eyes locked on Cain.

His expression doesn’t give anything away, but the four-second pause sure does. He’s shocked to see this woman and, though I can’t be sure, he may not be happy. “Larissa.” Pulling his chair out, he stands to place a kiss on each cheek. “What are you doing in Miami?” He’s completely polite, but I catch the slightest strain in his tone.

If I had to guess, I’d say the woman is in her early thirties. By her Manolos and her designer suit, she’s got money. By the way she’s smiling at Cain right now, she has good taste in men.

By the hardening in my stomach, I think she’s had a taste of Cain.

She certainly doesn’t look like a woman who has ever graced the stage of Penny’s before.

Her manicured finger points toward a building across the water, on the other side of the bay. “My firm did the interior design for the new luxury hotel that opened this weekend. I needed to show my face. It was a big
thing
in the media.”

Her firm.
Yeah, she’s got money, all right
.

“I left you a voice message yesterday to let you know I’d be in town. Didn’t you get it?” The way her head cocks to the side and her hand reaches out to graze his forearm, I no longer question whether she and Cain have had some sort of relationship. I know it.

And now I see the kind of woman that normally attracts Cain. Neither the real me nor the Charlie Rourke version of me plays in her league. It makes me wonder why I’ve gotten his attention at all. Is this still because I remind him of Penny?

Clearing his throat, Cain takes a step back from her and gestures to me. “Larissa, this is Charlie.”

I have to consciously unclench my jaw as green eyes turn to dissect me, flittering over my hair, lingering on my dress and my shoes for too long. I, too, am wearing a pair of Manolos, along with a simple and sexy black strapless dress from a high-end New York designer—both gifts from Sam. There’s nothing cheap about what I’m wearing.

And yet she sneers anyway.

“Charlie . . . cute.” By the haughty look on her face, I know that “cute” means something entirely different and not at all pleasant. And by Cain’s clenched jaw and the apology in his eyes, I can tell he sees it as well. “Is it short for anything?”

I wonder when he was with her last. I wonder when he’ll be with her next. That thought fills my stomach with dread. But I won’t show those thoughts.

“Nope. Just Charlie,” I say, leaning back in my chair as if completely at ease, offering a smile of my own. A smug smile that says, “I’m having dinner with the man you want to be with and as far as you know, we’re doing it like rabbits when we get home.” And, if that’s not clear enough, I turn to Cain and say sweetly, “I’m sorry, babe. I turned your phone off before bed last night. I didn’t want us to be disturbed.”

I’m not sure how he’s going to take that, but the devil inside me doesn’t care.

Cain clears his throat for a second time and sits down. He winks at me before taking a sip of his wine, that smile hiding behind it again.

But this woman either hasn’t taken the hint or is too full of herself to accept it. “So how do you know each other?”

Cain’s tongue darts over his top lip—a sign that he’s annoyed. He’s annoyed by her questioning. Or her, in general. Or both. “Charlie works for me.”

Awesome. Now “Design Firm” Larissa can properly gaze down her nose at me.

“Really? You don’t seem like the type to be in investment banking.”

Her eyes are on Cain, so she can’t see that my mouth drops open momentarily.
Investment banking? Is that what she thinks he does?
Apparently, I’m not the only one who leads an alternate life.

Cain is watching me like a hawk now. He must be wondering if I’ll play along. “I guess looks can be deceiving. And I assist Cain with the office work.”

“
Assist
?” An amused smirk touches her lips, her eyes drifting over my frame again but in a different way now. An inquisitive way.

In my peripheral vision, I see Cain’s lips curl in as he inhales sharply and I wonder what that’s about. Thankfully, the server comes with our meal, breaking up the awkwardness. “I’m here until Monday, Cain, so if you’d like to give me a call we can catch up.
My
assistant’s in town, as well. I’m sure she’d
love
to see you.” That’s an inside joke with sexual undertones if I’ve ever heard one.

Forget Cain being annoyed. I’m damn annoyed now. She’s taking up my precious time with him. Without even thinking, I reach forward to clasp Cain’s hand and lock eyes with him. To my pleasant surprise, Cain doesn’t waste a moment, rolling my hand within his to drag his thumb down my palm, sending sparks through my body. “I imagine I’ll be keeping him extremely busy until Monday and well beyond,
Larissa.
Now if you’ll excuse us, we need to eat so we can get home.”

There’s a long pause. I dare cast a glance up to see Larissa’s mouth twisted with displeasure. “Well, best of luck to you.” She holds her head high as she walks away at a brisk pace. When she disappears around the corner, I make a move to slide my hand out of Cain’s but he traps it within his for a moment, studying it, before finally letting go.

“Sorry if I was being presumptuous, but she got under my nerves and I could tell you were annoyed. I figured pretending we were dating was the best way to get rid of her.”

His brow spikes with curiosity. “How did you know I was annoyed?”

I hesitate for a moment, stabbing a chunk of steak from my salad. Should I tell him? Will he think I’m crazy? His expectant eyes on me make me finally cave. I gesture at his mouth with my free hand and explain, “You lick your top lip when you’re annoyed.”

“Have you been investigating me?” he asks playfully.

“Maybe,” I admit, hoping he doesn’t notice my ears reddening. “On my own, though. No hired help.” A sheepish look flashes over his features, and I have to giggle. “I have a thing for body language and facial expressions. I used to do a lot of theater, and people-watching is a good way to learn how to play different roles.”

“Drama . . .
hmm
.” Cutting into his steak, he casually asks, “What else do I do?”

“Not much, to be honest. You’re pretty guarded.” Stabbing the air with my fork, I gesture toward his neck. “You rub your neck over that tattoo when you’re anxious.”

Cain nods. After a moment, “What else?”

“You clear your voice when you’re uncomfortable.”

“What else?”

“You ball your fists when you’re really mad. I saw you do it that day at my old apartment.”
And last night, with Bob
. “Sometimes I see you do it when Ben’s around.”

That earns a loud burst of laughter. “I know I do that. It’s an old habit from my fighting days.”

A little bread crumb, a little trace of info into the history of Cain. I greedily latch on. “Fighting . . . like boxing?”

He gives an almost imperceptible shake. “Fighting like the kind that you don’t ever talk about. The kind that makes you a lot of money.”

My eyes roam his face, as perfect as it is, and settle on the small scar above his left brow. And I wonder what kind of damage has been done to that beautiful body of his. “Were you ever badly hurt?”

“A few broken ribs, bruised knuckles, some cuts. That’s all. So . . . no.”

I glance down at his hands, which iced my cheek just twenty-four hours ago. Now I wonder what kind of damage they’ve also done. “Did
you
ever hurt anyone badly?”

Dark eyes lock on me as he admits, “Yes, I have, Charlie.
Very
badly. One of them never got up.”

I’m not sure what reaction he’s expecting from me, but that won’t make me shy away. “Is that where you made this money you’re talking about?”

“Who’s being direct now?” By his tone, he doesn’t seem annoyed. “Yes. I made most of my money fighting.”

I clear my throat, deciding to steer the conversation in another direction. “How do you know Larissa?” Even her name makes my chest burn with jealousy. A startled look flashes across his face and I shrug. “You said you don’t do small talk.”

“I
got to know
Larissa during her last business trip to Miami and had no plans to connect with her again. Ever.” He curls his lip in that playful way as he pushes my plate slightly, a reminder that I need to keep eating. “You saved me.”

“I hardly think you were
in danger
with her.”

His left brows arches drastically. “No, trust me. I was. That one is . . .” He shakes his head. When he catches me watching him—all kinds of awful lewd images flying through my thoughts, trying as I can to keep a straight face—his forehead furrows deeply. I think I see a hint of blush under that stubble but I can’t be sure. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” I pause and then dare add in a mock-sultry voice, “Mr. Investment Banker.”

Cain’s face brightens with a chuckle. “Women don’t typically understand my choice in profession, so I’m not open about it.”

He said
women
. Plural.
Dammit
. I was hoping she was it. “No, I suppose they wouldn’t.” I didn’t understand his choice of profession, either. I still don’t. He’s so much different from any other club owner—and anyone else I’ve ever met. He almost doesn’t seem real.

A morose look flashes across his face. “None of them know much about me at all. But that doesn’t seem to bother them.”

I feel a twinge of sadness in my heart. Plenty of women are loved and paid attention to only for their enticing exterior. But what about men like Cain? I’m no better than Larissa. I have used him in the same regard, while on the stage. That face, that body; they are distracting enough to not see the man that may lie beneath.

Ironically, I’m beginning to think that what is beneath that outer surface may be even more beautiful.

“Maybe you’re dating the wrong type of woman,” I say softly, my eyes holding his gaze.

“I don’t date, Charlie. I’ve never done this. I told you that, yesterday.”

“You also don’t watch your dancers strip, right?”

I hear the light scratching sound of his hand rubbing over that stubble as he covers his mouth, hiding a tiny smile as he watches me with eyes that are suddenly sparkling playfully. “Only one.”

Heat floods through my body. I wonder if he knows that he can do that with just a look.

By the time the waiter comes to clear the plates, my meal is only half-eaten, but I’ve polished off two-thirds of the wine and I feel it tingle through my thighs. Or maybe it’s Cain’s continued gaze causing that.

I let Cain lead me—slowly, reluctantly—to his Navigator. Opening the passenger-side door for me like a gentleman, he hesitates. His hand finds its way to the small of my back and the simple touch steals my breath away, as aware as my body is of him right now. “Do you want me to take you back to your apartment, or Penny’s, or . . .” He lets the question hang, as if giving me the chance to decide if this night is ending or not. I have no interest in saying good night—and goodbye—to Cain yet. I know exactly what I want. By the way he’s staring at my mouth, I think Cain does, too.

Swallowing against the explosion of excitement inside me, I settle a firm, unguarded gaze on him and slowly shake my head.

chapter twenty-three

■ ■ ■

CAIN

I keep my arm coiled around Charlie’s taut waist as we pick our steps along the old pier. I could argue that I’m holding her so closely because it’s dark, she’s a bit tipsy, and the planks are uneven. But the full moon casts a healthy glow overhead, Charlie seems to have sobered up, and the planks are perfectly fine.

I was so close to driving us back to my condo.

So. Very. Close.

My uncomfortable erection reminds me of what I could be doing now, had I made a left turn instead of going straight.

But I can’t. Not yet.

Not if I want to do this right. And dammit, I want to do something right. Driving Charlie home tonight so I can fuck her until the sun rises—when she knows nothing about the man I am—does not feel right. That’s the kind of thing I do with Vicki and Rebecka. I won’t treat Charlie like those other women.

I want more.

“So security just
let
us on here?” Her arm waves out around us, her heels dangling from her fingers.

“Sure. I’m a member here.” The security guards at this private club all know me. I toss them money to look the other way when I come out to the pier in the middle of the night. I’ve been doing it for years. It’s my secret sanctuary. It’s the only reason I joined in the first place.