Four Friends (12 page)

Well, certain things had to be faced, Muriel Gilbert being one. Obviously if he didn’t tell those who needed to be told, Gerri would. Although it filled him with dread, he buzzed his administrative assistant. “A minute please, Kelly?”

She came into his office, carrying a notebook.

“Close the door, please,” he said.

She did so and settled herself in the chair directly facing his desk.

“I apologize—this is overdue. There’s a situation you should be aware of. I don’t consider it confidential, but I would appreciate your discretion,” he said.

“Sure. Yes,” she said, pen poised to take notes. This kind of briefing was routine for her.

“Gerri and I have separated. I’m not living at home, but I can be reached on my cell phone.”

She looked up, startled. Her usually rosy cheeks lost all color. “No,” she said in a breath.

“It’s been a few weeks, to be accurate. She just learned there was an indiscretion on my part many years ago. She needs some time to come to terms with that. We’re in counseling. I’m optimistic.”

“But I just saw her! We talked about—” Kelly stopped. “Oh, God,” she said. “Oh,
no!
”

“That’s all,” he said. “It’ll undoubtedly get out, but I haven’t told anyone else. I’m hoping this gets resolved before there’s a lot of conjecture.”

“Oh, God,” she said again. “How did this happen? I thought the two of you— Oh, God!” She took a few deep breaths. “How did she find out?”

“I’m not really sure,” he said. “But she did. I had decided a long time ago that if I was confronted with it, I wouldn’t lie. I guess it was bound to happen eventually. She’s a frequent visitor in these offices.”

Kelly scooted to the edge of her chair. “Phil. Boss. Listen, it could’ve been me. Oh, my God, if it was me, I’ll just kill myself.”

“I really don’t think we need any collateral damage here....”

“But I’d like to explain. Please.”

“It doesn’t matter,” he said. “The important thing is that you know what’s going on. It puts my schedule at some confusion sometimes because—”

“No, please. I have to explain. It was a while ago— I’m not sure exactly when,” she said. “Gerri caught me crying in the elevator and followed me to the bathroom. I’d been having some trouble at home, with John. She was her usual self, counseled me, laughed with me. Really, over the years, the things she’s said in passing made me think she knew everything... I mean, even I didn’t know everything, but I was pretty sure something was going on with you and... Well, over time she’d said things like she was ready to leave you for being such a typical man, being led around by your—”

Kelly stopped and cleared her throat. “That she’d come this close to throwing you out, that some things seemed unforgivable, but with the right kind of information and help... Oh, Jesus, I thought she knew! And I praised her for her strength and wisdom, putting her marriage back together after something as difficult as another woman!”

Phil clasped his hands on top of his desk. “It was an honest mistake,” he said.

“No, it wasn’t,” she responded, shaking her head. “I’m trusted with sensitive information all the time, officially and unofficially. I never say things I’m not sure about...”

“I know that, Kelly.”

“She caught me in an emotional moment. It had even crossed my mind that maybe John had someone... Oh, God, I thought we might be kindred spirits, both having gone through the same thing. I did this to you. To your marriage.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” he said. “Can we put this to bed, please?”

“I should resign. If you can’t trust my judgment...”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I could never replace you.”

“I could call her! I could tell her I’d just been listening to idle gossip! That I had no evidence of any—”

“Kelly,” he said somewhat sternly. “I admitted to the affair. And you weren’t just listening to idle gossip. Although we never discussed it, you were taking my calls, making my appointments, delivering messages for me when something came up that prevented me from keeping an appointment. And there’s the matter that she’s kept in contact with you...”

“But you never allowed me to pass on a message or change of address! You never—”

“It’s out,” he said. “I was past it long ago but Gerri can’t get over it yet. Can I count on you to keep this under your hat from now on? I think that’s the best either of us should expect from each other.”

She sniffed and lifted her chin. “I’ll write a letter of resignation.”

“I don’t want you to do that. I won’t accept it. You’re not only very important to me personally, but extremely important to the District Attorney’s office. Your mistake is understandable. In fact, the mistake was mine. I apologize that you were ever involved.”

“Would it help for me to call her? Apologize? Tell her that—”

“I wouldn’t recommend it. She’s explosive. Really pissed. She’s not angry at you as far as I know, but another mention of the situation might have her planting small bombs around government buildings.”

“Oh, God.”

“We’re all going to have to take this one day at a time. There will be a period of adjustment. It might get worse before it gets better. If you could manage not to say anything more about it, that might be best.”

“Sir, I just can’t tell you how—”

“Kelly, you can’t start calling me sir. I’m not angry with you. In fact, I’m relieved to know it was you and not a lot of office talk. We’ll have to move on now.”

“But if you end up divorced or something...”

“I’m not thinking that way. And if I know Gerri, neither is she. She’s putting all her energy into figuring out what it’s going to take for me to earn back my place in her life, and as soon as she lays it on me, we’ll get it done. It’s starting to sound like it could be really bloody, but hey—I’m a big man. Although some of her suggestions have been barbaric. Now really, that’s all the time I have for this.” He looked back at the paperwork on his desk.

“I just wish there was something I could do...”

“Hunker down,” he said without looking up. “We’re going to ride it out. Hope for the best.”

“Yes, sir,” she said, rising slowly. When she got to the door she turned, “Sorry, boss, I almost forgot. Clay wants to see you at your first opportunity.”

“Call his office,” Phil said, picking up a pen and scribbling something in the file on his desk. “Tell him I’ll be up in twenty minutes.”

Almost half an hour later Phil exited the elevator to the executive suite of the district attorney, Clayton Sturgess. He made the trek to the top floor of the building almost every day and on some occasions, several times a day. The executive assistant told him to go right in.

Clay was standing in front of his windows, hands in his pockets, gazing out at the Golden Gate Bridge. He turned slowly toward Phil. “How do you like that view?”

“I’ve always liked that view.”

“Well, it’s going to be yours soon. It’s time, Phil. I’m not going to run again. I’m leaving for private practice and you’re the heir apparent. They want you to run, of course.”

What should have been the best news in his career, hit Phil in the pit of his stomach like a boulder. He tried not to let anything resembling panic show on his face. “I’ll have to talk to Gerri. The kids.”

“Fait accompli,” Clay said, waving it off. “You’ve been slated for this job for at least ten years. Tell her you’re finally running. She’ll be thrilled.”

Phil thought if one more thing appeared to be going right for him in the middle of Gerri’s breakdown, she might actually dig up some electrodes. He thought about explaining that the opportunity he’d always wanted couldn’t have come at a worse time, but instead, he said, “Private practice?”

“A transitional phase. I have my eye on the attorney general position. Public office tends to get into your blood.” He picked up a folder. “The committee for my reelection would like to meet with you as early as next week. You have the option of putting your own people in place, but I can vouch for these folks. At least hear what they have to say.”

“Really, Clay, I haven’t made my decision yet.”

“Meet with them, anyway. You have some time before you make the commitment, but I can’t see you turning your nose up at this. You’re ready, the prosecutor’s office is ready, the mayor will endorse you. It has your scent all over it.”

Phil took the folder. “Thanks, Clay. It’s an honor to be asked.”

* * *

Sonja was released from the hospital after two days. She was given a prescription for an antidepressant and a schedule of appointments for counseling, but her breakdown caused a one-hundred-eighty-degree turn in her behavior. She was lethargic and morose and it was hard for Gerri and Andy to know if it was the antidepressant slowing her down, if the medication just wasn’t working yet or if it was simply how a woman feels when her husband walks out on her.

George had taken Sonja to the psychologist for daily appointments the first week and three visits in her second week, but she was still extremely sluggish and hard to motivate.

Gerri and Andy met in the street in front of Sonja’s house at 6:00 a.m., each holding their coffee cups. For the past couple of days they’d been rousting Sonja out of bed to walk with them. If they didn’t, they feared she might lie there until she got bedsores.

“Ready?” Gerri asked.

“Are you sure this is the right thing to do? It makes me uncomfortable,” Andy said.

“We have to. She has to get up, get moving, get some exercise, work off the side effects of the antidepressant, or of George—who knows which. Give her another week, she’ll start making her way back. Besides—” Gerri grinned “—think of it as tit for tat.”

They went to Sonja’s door, unlocked it and entered. The house was different now after just two weeks. It was no longer like walking into a pristine health spa—light, airy and calm with gurgling waterfalls, aroma therapies from spices and herbs to lavender. Now it was musty and dark, blinds drawn, dishes stacked in the sink, shoes kicked off anywhere, clothes tossed over chairs or sofas. In the bedroom, dirty clothes were left on the floor where they’d been dropped, and there was Sonja, a lump in the rumpled bed that looked suspiciously as though it hadn’t been made in forever.

“Jeez, it’s starting to look like my house,” Gerri said. She opened the blinds in the bedroom, though it was just beginning to get light outside. She pulled back the covers and tugged on Sonja’s arm. “Come on, La-La. Time to walk.”

“Humph,” Sonja said, limp. “I think I’ll have a day off.”

“No days off while the happy drug is moving through your veins. You have to get up. It’s time to walk! Come on! You’ll feel better, I promise!”

Sonja achieved a sitting position, skinny legs dangling, head down, her snarly hair canopying her face.

Andy was digging around on the floor for some sweats and a T-shirt. She found some wrinkled clothes and held them out to Gerri. They were the pretty salmon-colored sweats, but were definitely not clean.

Gerri reached for the sweatpants and Sonja flopped backward on the bed. “Humph,” she muttered. “Maybe later, huh?”

Gerri squatted and began working Sonja’s feet into the sweats. She started to laugh in spite of herself. “Oh, man, there was a time I would’ve paid to see this. Come on, my little La-La lamb, up you come. Don’t make me slap you.”

“You wouldn’t slap me,” she muttered, slowly pulling herself upright. Then she just stood there, the sweats around her ankles.

Gerri gave her a second, then resigned, she stooped, grabbed the waist of the sweats and pulled them up, tying them around Sonja’s middle. She pulled the nightshirt over Sonja’s head and watched as her arms just flopped back to her sides. “I could use a little help here, Sonja,” Gerri said. Sonja slowly opened her eyes into mean little slits.

Gerri laughed at her. “Want a bra? Or are you free-boobin’ it today?”

“Bra,” Sonja said miserably.

Andy handed Gerri a sports bra plucked out of the pile of dirty clothes and Gerri handed it to Sonja. “Get with the program, Sonja. You know I can’t get you in this thing.”

Sonja took it, put it over her head and wiggled her arms through the holes, pulling it down tight over her small breasts. Next were the T-shirt and shoes. Then Gerri grabbed Sonja’s hand and said, “Come on. Let’s get this over with.”

On the way through the living room, Gerri grabbed a sweatshirt off the back of the sofa and held it for Sonja to shrug into. Then they went out the front door.

Standing in the street at the end of Sonja’s sidewalk was BJ. “Morning,” she said. “I thought maybe I’d walk with you today. If that’s all right.”

“Well, this is a nice surprise,” Gerri said. “Isn’t this a nice surprise, Sonja?”

“Leave her alone,” Sonja said meanly. “She
needs
her
run
.”

BJ surprised them by laughing. “Getting a little feisty, aren’t ya, girlfriend? Well, you wait, I’ll have you running right alongside me before you know it.”

five

ANDY HAD MEETINGS after school and was late getting home. She didn’t bother stopping for a take-out dinner. When she walked into her kitchen from the garage, she saw Bob sitting at the new breakfast bar. He stood immediately, grinning. He wasn’t wearing his overalls, but a knit shirt and jeans, all spruced up. He threw his chest out, lifted his chin. When he did that, Andy thought he looked so confident and in charge, patriarchal. With that pose, he looked as if he should be standing in a photo behind a wife and seven sons, the proud leader of a strong clan.

Andy looked around. Blond oak cabinets, granite countertops, gleaming ceramic floor, shiny appliances, new stainless-steel sink, freshly painted trim. It was flawless and stunning. She shook her head, looked down at her feet and sniffed. A couple of tears spilled from her eyes and she gave a hiccup of emotion.

“Oh, you don’t like it,” he said, deflating in disappointment.

She lifted her head, the tracks of tears glistening on her cheeks. “It’s beautiful,” she said. “It’s more beautiful than I imagined it could be.”

“I hardly ever do a good enough job to make someone cry.”

“I don’t want it to be finished,” she said.