“What’s your problem?” Charlie shoots back, standing to face him.
Jimmy looks at him in disgust and turns and walks out the garage. Charlie sits back down next to me and I look at him nervously. “What was that about?”
Charlie rolls his eyes dismissively. “Jimmy’s a pussy. Forget him. He’s just pissed at life.”
“I don’t think he likes me.”
Charlie reaches out and entwines his hands through mine, tugging me closer to him. He ducks down so that his eyes are level with mine. “Of course, he likes you, Becca. What’s not to like?”
I shrug self-consciously. I know I’m not making this up.
“He’s probably just jealous that you’re not his,” he says. I allow a small smile, even though I know it’s not that. “Have I told you how pretty you look today?” he continues. His mouth turns into a crooked smile and suddenly it’s all I can focus on. I forget about Jimmy and whatever that argument was about. All I can focus on is Charlie’s mouth and the desperate need I suddenly have to kiss him.
I remember the night I lost my virginity to him. It started off like this. This need I had to kiss him constantly, the not wanting to have any distance between us, me pressing up against him so I could be as close as possible.
We were in his room and had been watching a movie. We’d only watched about twenty minutes of it before the movie was forgotten completely and we started the mother of all make out sessions.
Now, my involvement with guys up until that point had been pretty tame and fairly casual. Billy Jameson had put me off dating anyone for a long time, and my involvement with guys was pretty limited to a few make out sessions at the odd (non-MacAllister) party I attended with Sam or when I worked as a summer camp counselor. I had kissed a few guys, but the most physical it had ever gotten was a bit of over the clothes groping.
It was different with Charlie, though. I felt this draw to him that I had never felt before and I was almost scared that he was going to wake up and realize he was too good for me and back off. During this particular make out session, he pushed me down on the bed and climbed on top of me, propping himself up on his elbows and hovering over me. I was so lost in him and in such a Charlie induced daze I didn’t immediately realize that his fingers had unbuttoned the top of my jeans. I froze when I realized it and he immediately stopped and looked at me with a question.
I had guarded my virginity pretty carefully up to that point. I had definitely been in situations before where I could have taken it to the next level, but I had always chosen to keep it vanilla and not go there. I’d never
wanted
to go there. I still wasn’t sure I wanted to go there with Charlie. We’d only been dating for four weeks and I always pictured myself making a guy wait for it. But there was no denying the attraction I felt for him and I could see how much he wanted to move our relationship forward and if I’m totally honest, I didn’t want to disappoint him. So I took a deep breath, flashed a nervous smile and gave him a small nod. That was all the encouragement he needed.
It was all over fairly quickly, to be honest, and although it hurt more than I expected, it wasn’t as bad as some of the horror stories I’d heard from my friends. I remember sitting in my car afterward and thinking that I was no longer a virgin and how strange that was. That was definitely not how I pictured losing my virginity, off the back of some random run-of-the-mill make out session, but even though it was unexpected, I couldn’t say that I regretted it. Although part of me did wish he’d made a bit of an effort, had set the scene and maybe at least had some candles dotted around the room, but then I remembered how he’d smiled at me afterward and I was just happy that he was happy.
The next time I had seen Charlie, he had wanted to do it again almost right away. I remember being surprised and thinking, “
What? But I already did it once,”
but then I guess it’s true what they say. Once you start having sex, that’s it. You keep having sex. It did get better and I loved being that close to him and have absolutely no regrets about sleeping with him.
He reaches out and runs his finger across my jaw, pulling my attention back to him. “Now, that we’re alone, Becca, how are we gonna pass the time?” he teases me and suddenly tugs me forward so that I’m sitting on his knee. I adjust myself so that my legs are straddling him and suddenly, just like that, I forget everything else and I’m back to being lost in Charlie, and there is nowhere else I’d rather be.
“I
t’s senior year, Becca. You have to go to homecoming!”
I smirk at Jake sitting across from me. “Why? So they can name me homecoming queen?”
He starts to laugh. “I’d pay to see that!”
I grin back at him. We both had a free last period and bumped into each other by his locker so we’ve been sitting outside on the benches waiting for the rest of school to let out. It’s been fun. Jake and I used to hang all the time and though we always chat and catch up when we see each other, it’s usually only in passing since he’s always with Ryan and I always do my best to avoid him. It’s pretty rare that we get to hang out one on one these days, but it’s been just like old times.
“Who are you gonna go with?”
He shrugs. “Dunno.”
I cock an eyebrow. “Zara?”
He shrugs. “Maybe. Maybe not.”
“Well if you’re gonna take a girl from this school, I can probably guess her name in like five guesses.” He raises an eyebrow and I smirk at him. “Seriously, you guys all date like the same ten girls. Dude, it’s pretty incestuous! And it’s like a rule that they have to be a cheerleader.”
Jake starts to laugh. “Shut up, Becca.”
“I’m being serious.”
“I dated Sally Hopkins for six months last year.” I roll my eyes, conceding that one. Sally’s not a cheerleader, but she is on student council so it’s just as bad. “And Ryan’s dated tons of people who aren’t cheerleaders.”
I start to laugh. “That’s because Ryan’s dated most of the school. And that’s another reason I wouldn’t go to the dance; like I want to see Ryan crowned King and him thinking he’s even more important than he already does!”
“You’re too harsh on him, Becca.”
“Oh come on, Ryan gets whatever he wants, whenever he wants and whoever he wants. And you know it.”
“Not whoever he wants.”
I roll my eyes. “We both know that for some strange reason Ryan can get any girl in this school. And has dated most of them.”
“He dates around to distract himself.”
“From what? His perfect life?”
Jake’s gaze levels me and he doesn’t say anything for a couple of minutes. “You really are clueless, Becca.” I roll my eyes. I don’t really want to get into a discussion about Ryan with Jake. When we first fell out, Jake used to try to talk to me all the time about him, but he stopped doing that when he saw how annoyed it made me. I really hope he’s not about to start up again now. And besides, Ryan’s life
is
perfect. He’s a star athlete, ridiculously popular, has a great family and doesn’t have to worry about money. If Ryan’s only problem is me thinking he’s a douche, then he’s got it pretty good. “You’re like the most oblivious person I’ve ever met,” Jake continues.
I scowl at him. “I resent that,” I tell him. “I’m incredibly perceptive.” Jake cocks an eyebrow at me and I start to laugh. Okay, so that’s a lie. I’m not incredibly perceptive but why should I pay attention to things that don’t affect me? I have enough to figure out with this whole first boyfriend thing without paying attention to other people’s lives.
Jake sighs. “Look, you really should come to homecoming. We’ll show our faces for like two minutes and then go down to the beach or hit up a party or something.”
“We?”
“Sure.” He grins. “You can be my date. And you’re not a cheerleader,” he finishes smugly.
I can’t help smirking at him. There’s not a chance I’m going to homecoming and it’s definitely not Charlie’s scene, but it’s nice that Jake wanted to go with me, his friend, rather than trying to use it as a chance to hook up with some girl he’s probably already been with a million times. He used to invite me to anything and everything, but I always said no. Then he stopped asking and I have to admit that sometimes, I missed him asking. That’s another thing I blame Ryan for—getting in between my friendship with Jake. Granted, it’s me avoiding doing anything social with Jake because Ryan will be there, but still. I blame him.
“Who’s not a cheerleader?” My head turns and I see Mason slide into the seat next to me. I look around and see students spilling out of the school building. The bell must have rung and we didn’t notice. “What up, McKenzie?” he greets me. I stare back at Mason, surprised he’s acknowledging me and he offers me an easy grin, like it’s the most natural thing in the world for us to be sitting next to each other chatting. This is weird. Mason and I don’t talk.
“Becca,” Jake answers Mason’s question. “She’s gonna be my date for homecoming.”
I roll my eyes at his words and Mason starts to laugh. “Serious? Can I be there when you tell Jackson?” They share a look and I screw my face up confused.
Why would Ryan care if I went to a lame school dance with Jake?
Then I remember that he doesn’t like me and probably wouldn’t want me hanging out with his best friend.
“He’s joking,” I clarify to Mason. “I am definitely not going to homecoming.”
“Becca, come on!” Jake carries on. “We’ll go in a big group, rent a limo. It’ll be fun. Ryan’s going stag so the three of us can go together. Like old times.”
I cock an eyebrow at him. Like old times? Not a chance. I know I’ve spoken to Ryan a bit more recently, what with his grandma and everything, but that does not mean we’re suddenly friends again. “That ship has sailed.” Jake sighs in annoyance. “Homecoming’s lame, anyway.”
“Yeah. It’ll be totally lame,” Mason agrees. “Your boy will get crowned, we’ll leave, then we’ll get wasted. Same as always.”
“My boy?” I ask confused. I look over at Jake, who’s looking at me intently. “Who’s my boy?”
Mason’s eyes find Jake, who shakes his head just ever so slightly at Mason. “Oh, I just meant your neighbor. Like Ryan’s your neighbor and will probably be king.”
I raise my eyebrows but don’t say anything, because my phone beeps in front of me and I reach out to read the message.
Charlie: I’ve been thinking about you all day.
“What are you smiling at? Who is that?”
I look up at Jake distracted and realize I have the widest grin on my face. That’s what Charlie does to me. He makes me happy. “No one.”
“Your new boyfriend?”
I’m surprised. “How do you know about Charlie?” I don’t remember telling Jake about Charlie and I didn’t mention it was him I was leaving Ryan’s for after his grandma’s wake. A feeling of dread comes over me when I realize Ryan probably told him he caught us dry humping at Zara’s party.
Jake looks at me for a second. “So, are you like really into him, or what?”
I shrug my shoulders.
“No, I’m being serious. Do you really like him?”
I roll my eyes and am about to respond with some sarcastic comment when I glance behind Jake and see Ryan over his shoulder making his way over to us from the main steps. His eyes lock with mine for a second and it springs me into motion, gathering up my books that lay in front of me. I really can’t be bothered to deal with any of Ryan’s insults right now, especially if he’s been telling Jake stuff about Charlie and me.
“Right, well, see you guys later then.”
Jake looks confused at my sudden departure and turns around to follow my gaze. He turns back at me with a look of annoyance on his face. “Stay,” he says. “Come get food with us.”
I shake my head and stand, turning to go.
“Wait!” I turn back to Jake, sighing in annoyance just as Ryan reaches the table.
“What?”
“You should come back to my house with me. My mom keeps asking about you.”
This makes me falter. Jake’s mom is amazing. She’s this fun-loving, excitable, free spirited hippy that always has time for everyone. It’s got to be going on a year since I last went to his house and saw her.
My phone beeps again.
Charlie: I miss you.
My heart swells with emotion at those words. I miss him too. Badly. It’s been nearly five days since I saw him at his practice and I haven’t stopped thinking about him since.
“Becca!”
I glance up at Jake. “What?”
He rolls his eyes at me. “Come back to my house? Lizzy would love to see you too. She asks about you all the time.” I look back at Jake, who is wearing a triumphant smirk. He knows that’ll get me. Lizzy is his little sister. She’s almost ten years younger than us and absolutely adorable. When she was a toddler, she followed me around everywhere. Come to think of it, it must be even longer than a year since I’ve seen her. “Just come for an hour.”
I let out a small sigh. I would love to see Jake’s mom and Lizzy, and I don’t have anything better to do, but I don’t want to go if Ryan and Mason are going too. Call me stupid, but I’m just not comfortable around them. “Who else is going?” I ask, flicking my eyes toward Mason and Ryan.
“I’m out,” Mason tells me. “Gotta head home.”