Forgotten (21 page)

Gripping my hair into my fists, I was
tempted to pull it out. He knew I desperately wanted to see, which
wouldn’t have been all that hard to guess, but he offered me this
gift of sight, like he believed he could do it.

“
Jace, nothing’s wrong with
my eyes, not physically,” I said and let go of my hair. I looked up
at him and hoped he’d see my acceptance of my handicap instead of
the lie hiding my eyes. “The trauma from my family’s deaths forbids
me to see anything. The doctors say it’s some kind of coping
mechanism.”

“
So you’ll turn down the
only person who can heal you?” You’d rather wallow in your own self
pity than take a chance for an actual meaningful life?”

I crossed my arms and weighed my
options. “Fine, let’s pretend I’ve lost my mind, and I believe you.
What’s the cost?”

He took a deep breath. “I believe no
harm will come to you. However, if you’re simply human, and I try
to heal you, you will die.”

“
So death and sight are on
the table, are they?” I scoffed and slid off the roof. I aimlessly
wandered around in circles. “Sorry, pal, but I’d rather live a
long, happy, dark life.”

“
Liar.” He grabbed my arm,
stopping me.

“
I do just fine without my
eyes. Seeing isn’t important” I lied, looking to the horizon which
just happened to be the exact opposite direction of his glowing
face. I wished I could see the reds, yellows, and oranges, like I
had in the vision just moments before.

“
If sight isn’t enough,
then what is?” he asked and forced me to face him. His calloused
hand gently stroked my cheek. He refused to speak again until I
gave in and looked at him. “I’ll do anything if you let me open
your eyes to a world bigger than black and white… more than color…
more than anything a human can see.”

I took a deep breath, and blew it out
slowly. “You seem to know a lot about me.”

I brought my hand up to my face. I
skimmed his hand that was cupping my face as I looked back at the
horizon before I let it fall away.

“
You know more about me
than you could have found on the internet. My foster records are
sealed so either you broke into my case manager’s building, or
hacked Ida’s system remotely. But I don’t care how you found me. I
don’t know what you want with me, but it’s not important if we can
strike a deal. I’ll let you fix my eyes,” I said, figuring there
wasn’t anything he could do that would make me any less blind. And
if my death meant I’d find answers about my past, then I’d take it.
“I want you to investigate someone for me.”

“
Who?”

“
Find the person who
murdered my parents and my sister.”

C
HAPTER
E
IGHT

It wasn’t long after I fell asleep
that I was slammed into a nightmare. I begged my head to quit
pounding, while gripping the sand with my hands. It ground into my
knees. I struggled to breathe. Only the cold night air greeted me.
No warm hands rubbed my back. I was alone. My head felt like it was
erupting; the harder I tried to calm myself the worse it became.
The longer I stayed utterly still, the more my body disagreed with
me. My lungs burned. I tried to open my eyes to look for Jace, but
acid seemed to reside in my eyes instead of tears. My muscles felt
like they were melting off my bones. My stomach leapt into my
throat.

“Jace!”

“You carelessly give away your love,
like you’d never been hurt, but when life gets tough, you abandon
everyone who has ever cared for you,” Jace said.

His hand was on my back, but he didn’t
rub away the tension like before. Nevertheless, he did what I
wanted; he took away my physical pain. My breathing became under
control. My body stopped fighting itself. I just wished my mind
would follow suit.

“I’m sorry!” I screamed.
“I’m sorry,
so sorry
Jace, but I don’t remember you! I didn’t know you before the
bowling alley! I never knew you, Jace. I’m not trying to play hard
to get. I’m not Deino!”

Jace said nothing. He removed his hand
when the signs of my body fighting itself were over. Telling him I
didn’t remember him was the worst possible thing I could have said,
and I knew it. However, the reason I said it wasn’t to hurt him, he
needed to know. Even if it was just in my dreams, he needed to know
the truth.

I gripped the sand like the world
would expel me if I didn’t hold on for dear life. It wasn’t because
my body was starting to rip itself apart again, it was because my
heart was breaking – not because I was sure I’d just broken Jace’s,
but because of the guilt in my soul; every regret, every failure,
and every time I let someone down surfaced in my mind.

Pebbles shifted through my fingers.
Each one represented a missed opportunity to do something important
with my life. I cried into the sand, begging to understand this
life I was dealt. I understood nothing, I understood that. I made
everything complicated even when I wasn’t trying. I made my dreams
confusing when they didn’t need to be. I made life difficult; I
lived when no one else survived. I saw my sister’s blood in my
mind, but couldn’t do anything to help her. My parents died; By
some miracle, I was saved. Instead of doing great things with my
life, I was a nobody in school. I hadn’t done anything great or
helpful. I was a coward and a runaway. The visions haunted me like
they were ghosts of my past. Their death’s haunted me, like my
visions. I survived when no one else did, which was the biggest
shame of all. I was the only pitiful survivor, and I’d done nothing
with my pathetic existence. Now my dreams showed me a world where I
could be happy and lie in the arms of someone who cared for me, but
I still fought him and myself. I couldn’t allow myself to be happy
for a single moment, because I was too heavy with guilt, just for
living.

Tears soaked into the sand as I
screamed apologetically. I couldn’t remember Jace – not because I
hadn’t wanted to – but because I simply didn’t. That was the truth
– the honest truth.

“You
truly
have no memory of me?” Jace
asked.

My body trembled. I opened my mouth,
but couldn’t get out more than a squeak. I refused to let myself
get in the way when he took me in his arms. As if given a remedy, I
instantly let go of my inflicted agony. He rocked me while I lay
against his chest. Listening to the sound of his heart beating, I
became to feel relief, comfort, and safety.

“
My body is aged, and my
soul is broken,” I whispered, like it was a phrase in a song. I
frowned, wondering why I’d just said something poetic like that. I
felt like it, but I wasn’t one to speak in riddles.

“
So give me a taste of your
kiss, and let me be reborn into a life of eternal passion.” Jace
said, speaking in the same melody. He rested his chin on my
forehead and rocked me. My skin started to prickle with hope.
“You’re in there somewhere, hiding from yourself, aren’t you,
dearest?”

***

Bree was holding up a wall in the
waiting room, when I walked out of the doctor’s office. She had the
decency not to ask me what the doctor said about my sight. My eyes
were perfectly fine, no changes. I told him about seeing a select
few people as white figures instead of normal shades of gray. He
patted my hand and asked how I’d held up since celebrating the
anniversary of my family’s death.

“
If I wanted to talk about
that, I’d go to a therapist, not an optometrist. You’d think a
person with a doctorate degree would understand that I wanted his
services for my eyes not my head,” I said in frustration as Bree
and I walked out of the office.

She bought me breakfast at the coffee
shop. She rattled on and on about something Ryker said after I
finished venting about my pointless doctor visit. I wasn’t paying
attention. I was trying to cool off from the appointment when a
white figure, a few booths down, caught my attention. I was being
watched.

My insides went cold. Instead of
making a scene in front of Bree, I waited for her to go to the
bathroom before confronting the person, who looked like the white
figure I’d seen spying on me from my foster’s house.

“
I’m the Rippler,” he said
and offered his hand.

My skin tingled as the air vibrations
hit me. I became nauseated. The last thing I wanted to do was touch
him.

Brown curls twisted over
his pale blue eyes as he laughed. My aging skin crawled as he
wrapped his hand around my wrist. He was taller than me but only by
a few inches. Another woman with tanned skin and coffee brown hair
watched as he lifted me from my seat on the grassy field. The sweet
scent of lilies filled the air.

Three spears shone in the
light. Their tips were thrown into the ground. The woman with wavy
coffee-colored hair walked over and touched the spear. It
disappeared instantly.

“
You won’t be threatening
my sister with these, not yet Rippler,” she said.

The athletic man danced me
around the meadow. “You recall everyone’s past, even the darkest
parts?” the Rippler asked softly.

“
Your tolerance has never
been very good with me,” the man stated and dimmed himself as he
withdrew his hand. He cocked his head to the side, only to brush
his curly hair back. “Well, at least the Healer isn’t lying; you’re
not ready to meet her yet.”

“
Who?”

“
The Master.”

I cringed at the mention of her name
but said nothing. He looked over his shoulder a moment after Bree
walked out of the bathroom, toward us. He excused himself, while I
stood dumbfounded.

“
You ready for another
torture session?”

“
What?” I gasped.
Had I blacked out and told her about
Jace?

“
School,” she said
plainly.

We walked out of the coffee shop and
into her pickup. The door squealed like always when I shut it. I
said nothing as we drove to the lone brick building. I was silent
as we pulled into the parking lot. I grabbed my backpack, and
hopped out of the vehicle. I started to unfold Stella, when she
stopped me. After offering her hand to guide me, I followed her up
the stairs. Students filed in around us. We stopped in front of our
lockers to drop off our backpacks and grab the needed text
books.

History was my first period class – my
favorite subject by a landslide. I didn’t even mind Mr. Tinsley,
the teacher, even though his voice was monotone. I swore he tried
to put his students to sleep, but the indifferent sound of his
voice, really described the essence of history itself. The big,
disastrous events were no more important than the seemingly
unimportant ones. In the grand scheme of things, people, places,
and events would eventually all become a distant memory destined to
repeat itself.

“
You need a girl’s night,”
Bree said, diagnosing me as being entirely too stressed
out.

“
Can’t, I have plans
tonight.” I closed the locker door.

“
So cancel,” she
said.

“
Are you trying to weasel
out of our date?” Jace said, approaching us.

Bree squealed. I softly jabbed her in
the side, hoping to convey the message ‘Don’t make this a big
deal.’ She must have got the message, because she excused herself
and left for class. I shut her locker door and wondered briefly if
she’d realize she forgot her books before the bell sounded. Jace
leaned against the locker door and crossed his arms.

“
It’s not a date,” I said
to Jace, as I dug out my special edition world history book.
“You’re coming over only to get the police files, so you can do
more research about… their murders. No one should be home if you
come right after school.”

“
Pretending that I’m your
boyfriend is the perfect alibi if anyone asks why I’m coming over,
dearest.”

“
As long as we both
understand it’s just an alibi.”

***

That evening, the Thompson’s doorbell
rang ten minutes to seven. I’d been pacing the living room for the
better part of an hour, and was closest to the front door. Max
howled until I opened it. Jace slid off his sunglasses and stepped
into the house before I welcomed him inside. Max sniffed him like
he wasn’t sure whether or not to allow him inside until Jace
kneeled down to give him a good scratch behind the ears. That won
Max over.

“
I told you to be here
shortly after school,
before
everyone got home,” I whispered.

Jace stood. He shrugged off his jacket
and handed it to me. “I’m running a touch late; Sue me.”

“
You’re not staying long,”
I said stubbornly. “I’ll grab the files and be back in a
few.”

“
Who’s there, munchkin?”
John called from the kitchen.

I sighed. Jace chuckled.

“
Just a friend from
school.”

“
Is Bree hungry, dear?”
Martha asked, walking into the hallway. She stopped when she
noticed that
my friend
was not my long-time girlfriend.

“
Jace – Jace Eatros,” he
said, and extended his hand.