Forget Me Not (The Heart's Spring) (12 page)

David had hoped to avoid any shopping trips for as long as possible, but Christy and Louisa broke him down with their pleas, determined as they were to buy new fabric to sew dresses for an upcoming barn dance. While the town of Golden had calmed since his childhood, he still wasn’t about to let his sisters go there alone.

Also, he had lost the wrestling match with Amos, so he had to be the one to take them.

The whistle of an incoming train called to him through the damp air as he walked with his sisters into the heart of town. Every time he heard the cry, it pained him like a physical blow. He desperately wanted to hop on board and see Elizabeth again. Make sure she was all right. Tell her how much he loved her. But something always stopped him. As much as he wanted to go to Elizabeth, he couldn’t leave his family, not after they had finally been reunited again. It was his responsibility to stay, to not miss another moment with them after all the memories they had lost.

He felt a hand holding him back every time the urge to leave hit him. He was waiting for something, felt the truth of it floating in the back of his mind and the depths of his heart. Perhaps God was telling him to wait on His will, as hard as it was and as much as he wanted to take matters into his own hands. Still, inaction made him feel powerless. What kind of man would do nothing when his sweet friend, his forget-me-not love, was living in a mining town with her rascal of a brother and a man who stole kisses from her?

What kind of man would ever leave her there in the first place?

Groaning inwardly, he tried to keep his step light as he escorted his sisters down the wooden walkway and opened the door of the shop for them. He ran a hand through his dusty hair, unable to hold back a smile when Louisa thanked him and Christy elbowed him playfully as she walked past.

He gave them a wave before closing the door after them, choosing to drop onto a beat-up, tobacco-stained wooden bench and wait outside rather than brave the yards of fabric and Christy’s excited squeals.

“Casey?”

The tentative female voice brought his gaze up, where a woman around his mother’s age stared at him, rooted to the sidewalk.

He jumped to his feet and slid his hat from his head. “Yes.”

She gasped and took a step back, her gold and gray hair falling from its confines as she shook her head. “Of course, I heard from your ma months ago that you were alive. It’s just such a shock, to see you for myself. You really are alive.” Her eyes grew wide, as if he appeared before her as a ghost instead of a flesh-and-blood man.

He gave her a small smile. “Yes, I’m alive, ma’am.”

“Oh goodness, you wouldn’t remember me, would you? I’m Sarah Anne. Elizabeth’s ma.”

His smile fell. He bunched up his hat in his hands. “Mrs. Pruitt.”

Her blue eyes took him in from head to boots, and her lips lifted. “You’ve grown into such a nice young man.” Clutching a valise closer to her skirt, she added, “I wanted to thank you for watching out for my girl.”

His face burned with shame. “I don’t deserve your gratitude, ma’am. I should have brought her straight home. It was foolish of me to take her to Virginia City.”
More than you could ever know.

“It’s all in the past now. I’m just grateful, so very grateful she made it safely to Virginia City.” She sniffed, apparently unable to continue as she lifted a handkerchief to wipe her eyes. Before he could apologize further, she recovered. “I’m on my way there, myself, to attend her wedding.”

David’s blood froze in his veins, but she didn’t seem to notice the way he stiffened.

“I wish she had found someone here, and I can only hope he’s a decent boy. Like you.” She bestowed a smile on him, but when she caught his expression, her eyebrows scrunched.

Then the train whistle blew again, and she shifted her valise to her other hand. “I really must be going.” Her mouth opened again, as if she wanted to add something else, but she ducked her head and turned without another word.

Her wedding.

Elizabeth’s getting married.

To Joe.

His mind scrambled frantically, even as his heart seemed incapable of one more beat.

As he took a few steps after the woman, he remembered his sisters and glanced back at the store. He closed his eyes in frustration, then rushed to catch up with Elizabeth’s ma, stopping her in the middle of the street. She studied him, and he had the odd sense she knew the things he wasn’t willing to tell her.

He licked his dry lips, escorting her the rest of the way across the street as he said, “Please tell Elizabeth…”
What?
He scuffed his boots on the rough wood of the sidewalk, then lifted his pleading gaze to Sarah Anne. “Please tell her I wish her well. Tell her I…”
Love her.
But he couldn’t say the words.

Sarah Anne’s eyes were pools of compassion. “I’ll give her your message.”

She left then, scurrying to the train station.

He stood under the Colorado sun, watching.
Please, God, guide us all.
Even as his body felt tethered to the spot, freedom reached down and pulled him from the rush of emotions as he listened to the voice that whispered,
Wait.

The wind picked up and the late afternoon sunlight poured down on Joe as he stood next to Elizabeth, waiting for the train that would hopefully bring her ma. The breeze brought no relief to Joe’s constricted chest, though—he felt sure his breathing would be permanently labored. Even though he had his arm about Elizabeth’s waist as they stood together, he felt like they had grown miles apart since last week’s fire.

He had made a mistake, a big one. Perhaps an unforgivable one. When he had seen the smoke rolling from Jacob’s house, all he could picture was the devastation left behind from the fire over a decade earlier, when he had been just a boy. Seeing so many buildings burned to the ground and the sorrow brought by the loss, the fire had turned Joe’s heart cold.

He couldn’t stand the idea of the town burning up again. His first thought had been to run to the fire station, to recruit as many people as possible to help control the fire.

He had forgotten about Annabelle…and for a moment he had forgotten about Elizabeth.

He cringed inwardly, knowing that if he had been thinking clearly and rationally, he could have spared Elizabeth the pain and saved Annabelle himself.

Tightening his hold on Elizabeth’s waist, he tried to take in a deep breath. Still, his breathing remained shallow as fear kept a painful grip on his chest. He was afraid. Afraid of what might have happened. Afraid of what could yet happen. Afraid that somehow the fire wasn’t the only thing keeping him and Elizabeth apart.

***

Every time Elizabeth closed her eyes, flames danced across her eyelids. She shuddered, and Joe drew her closer to his side.

Apparently the fire had been caused by a candle, which Annabelle had forgotten to blow out and accidentally knocked over in her sleep, having gone to bed early. It was terrifying to think of how quickly a fire could escalate.

Bits of conversation from the day she had first come to Virginia City, when she had first met Joe and he had told her about her brother, came back to her as she stood waiting for the train.

I think the fire of ’75 really struck fear in him, though, ya know? So many people lost everythin’.... With a decade separatin’ him from that disaster, ya would think he would finally feel secure.

Tears came to her eyes. She hadn’t understood then what Joe had meant. Perhaps she could never fully comprehend the horror and fear Jacob had faced all those years ago, but she felt closer to understanding now. Her brother had moved on, but he had been afraid to lose everything again. So he had rebuilt one business and established a new, more lucrative one, so he could be financially secure. And then, over the years, he must have fallen in love with one of his employees.

Owning a brothel was wrong; she knew that. She held onto the hope that Jacob knew that, too. His priorities had to shift in the face of potentially losing what he really held most dear—Annabelle. The good that God had brought out of the evil of her brother’s past.

Raising a hand, she wiped a tear from her cheek and shaded her eyes, hoping for a glimpse of the train. Her ma would be here soon, and she would get to introduce her to Jacob and Annabelle.

When the train finally whistled in the distance, Elizabeth realized with a start that she was wishing one more person would be on it.
David.

A small crowd had gathered at the platform, waiting for the train to come to a stop and for its passengers to step into the daylight. Several minutes crawled by like several hours as Elizabeth waited with her heart in her throat—wondering, hoping.

A few people she didn’t recognize stepped down from the train. And then she felt tears gather in her eyes as she saw a man step off and help her ma to the ground. Sarah Anne searched the group of onlookers, and when Elizabeth met her gaze she gave a little cry.

“Ma.” The months that had passed since she left home seemed like a mere trip into town, or perhaps her whole lifetime. Time made no difference as she rushed into the arms of her mother.

She sobbed as relief washed over her and her ma’s tears fell on her head. “My little girl.” The words brushed over her in calming strokes. It was as if no one else was there.

“I’m so sorry, Ma,” she managed, her voice halting and broken. “I’m so sorry I ran away.” The last word came out in a low wail, and she buried her face in her mother’s warm shoulder. She wanted to clarify her apology. To tell her mother she was sorry for not coming home first. For not sending her word sooner. But she couldn’t manage any other explanations.

“I know, dear. It’s all right. It’s all right.” Sarah Anne spoke soothingly, running her hand down Elizabeth’s hair and holding her tight.

Finally, Elizabeth remembered Joe. Pulling away slowly, she offered a wobbly smile and gestured to the man she was going to marry. “Ma, this is Joe. Joe, this is my mother.”

Sarah Anne glanced between the two of them, then stepped to Joe and embraced him. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Joe smiled as he squeezed Sarah Anne. “It’s a pleasure to meet Elizabeth’s ma.” Then he stepped back, grabbed Sarah Anne’s valise, and led the way to the hotel.

Even though Elizabeth knew in her heart that it was hopeless, she couldn’t resist one last look behind her at the train. David never came.

***

Elizabeth had returned to Lake Tahoe thousands of times in her imagination. In her mind’s wanderings, there had been sunshine, cheerful birdsong, and wildflowers lining the trail. Now that she was really making the trip, rain followed their group as soon as they left Virginia City on horseback.

The weather did nothing to calm her nerves, and she knew she was shaking from more than the late-spring cold. It wasn’t really excitement, either. Uncertainty paralyzed her at the thought of being married, of a permanent partnership.

As her horse plodded along, she refused to dwell on thoughts of David.

Glancing around, she did allow herself a small smile at their wedding party, composed of Joe, his brother Seth, Seth’s wife, Sarah Anne, Annabelle, Jacob, and Myghal. Myghal looked about as unsure as she felt. He was, after all, David’s friend.

Jacob rode up alongside her, and for the first time since she had found out about his secret, she offered him a smile. His response couldn’t quite be called a smile, but his features softened and his green eyes brightened a little.

“Joe has been a good friend of mine for years,” he began.

She wound the reins around her hand as she waited.

“He’s a good man, and he would make a good husband.”

“Would?” Her forehead wrinkled in confusion.

He sighed. “I hardly feel qualified to give you brotherly advice, or to intrude on your affairs. But do you really love him? When you first came here almost a year ago, you were smitten with that young man—David, I believe his name was. The one who brought you here.”

“How would you know?” She sensed the venom in her voice and tried to let it drain away. “You were never around,” she added quietly.

He sighed again and swiped his gloved hand across his forehead. “I know. And I’m… I regret what I’ve done.”

“I love Joe.” Was she saying it for his benefit or hers?

“I know. But this David fellow… He came to find out what I was hiding. He was angry because he knew how much I had hurt you. Elizabeth, that boy loved you. You don’t ever get over love like that.”

His gaze sought out Annabelle then, and Elizabeth’s heart warmed. How much of what he had done had been for his wife’s sake?

Thinking about David only hurt her and muddled her emotions, so she asked in a small voice, “What will you do after the wedding?” Jacob hadn’t gone back to work since the fire, but Elizabeth was afraid he might eventually return to it.

He set his jaw. “I’m selling the store and closing down the brothel. I have enough money set aside to take Annabelle somewhere else, somewhere where I can spend more time with her and protect her. I’ve done her wrong by working all the time.”

“I think our parents would have been proud of that decision. And how could anyone not love Annabelle?”

He finally smiled as he sat taller in the saddle.

“Perhaps you could come back to Colorado.”

As soon as the words left her mouth, she bit her tongue and blushed. She wouldn’t be going back to Colorado with Sarah Anne. She would be married and living in the canyon with Joe.

Jacob nodded, his grin perhaps a little wider than before. “Perhaps.” Then he rode ahead to catch up with Annabelle.

***

Elizabeth drew her knees to her chest and looked out over the dark lake capped by the black sky. They had arrived at Lake Tahoe the evening of their second day of traveling, and Joe and Jacob would be leaving in the morning to fetch a preacher from Carson City. In the meantime, Sarah Anne, Annabelle, and Naomi would help her get ready for the marriage ceremony to be held on the shore. Sarah Anne had brought Elizabeth’s first mother’s wedding dress, which she had hemmed and “fancied-up,” as she put it, for Elizabeth.

Tears came to her eyes as she rested her head on her knees, afraid to gaze any longer at the lake—afraid to be reminded of the decision she had made at this very spot months ago, when she had said yes to Joe.

She sensed someone approaching from behind her. Slowly lifting her head, she found Sarah Anne standing nearby.

“Is it all right if I join you?”

She nodded her head, the light from the campfire on the slope enough to illuminate her motions. Sarah Anne sat down beside her. Only distant laughter broke the silence. Elizabeth didn’t trust her voice, and she didn’t think she could explain her irrational worries to the woman who raised her.

After a while, Sarah Anne asked quietly, “Do you remember Casey?”

“Casey?” Her brows lowered in thought.

“You remember. Louisa and Christy’s brother? The two of you used to chase each other through the fields. He was always bringing you home muddy, your hair in tangles.” Sarah Anne chuckled.

Memories flooded her mind, causing tears to burst forth. She did remember Casey, if only barely—more the feeling of contentment than the details themselves. She did recall an afternoon when they’d picked forget-me-nots by the river, and she suddenly ached for those carefree days. Rubbing her palms over her eyes, she finally replied, “I remember. Why’d
ya ask?”

Her mother regarded her with a watery blue gaze she couldn’t comprehend. “He’s alive. Returned home last fall. I saw him before I left on the train.”

“Really? But wasn’t he…didn’t he drown?”

“We all thought so. Apparently he survived, and he’s been living in the mountains all this time.” Sarah Anne studied her, waiting for something.

“That’s wonderful he’s alive. His whole family must be so happy, especially after what happened to their pa.”

Sarah Anne set a hand on her arm. “Elizabeth, you met him.”

“Well, of course, when we were little…” Her words trailed off, and her heartbeat slowed. She recalled hands holding a bunch of flowers out to her, hands that had seemed just big enough and yet gentle enough to encompass the flower stems. A brown gaze that always seemed to melt a little at her gladness, that always sensed her emotions and met them with the response she needed. He hadn’t really changed that much, had he?

Her head floated, light and dizzy. “Are you saying that Casey—that Casey is David? That Casey was the one who helped me, the one who…?” She choked on a sob.

Sarah Anne gathered her close as she cried. With a shaky voice, Elizabeth asked, “But how can that be? Why wouldn’t he tell me who he was?”

“I don’t know, dear. Maybe you should ask him for yourself.”

“What?” She pushed back and swiped at her tears with frozen hands.

Her ma’s sweet face was silhouetted, but Elizabeth could still see the truth glowing in her eyes. “Casey looked like he would have done just about anything to get on that train with me. He asked me to tell you that he wishes you well, but what he didn’t say was just as obvious. He loves you.” She paused, searching Elizabeth’s eyes in the dim light. “And I think you love him, too.”

New, hot tears fell down her cheeks, and she shook her head. “How can you know for sure?”

Sarah Anne smoothed a strand of Elizabeth’s hair, brushing her cheek with her thumb. “A mother knows these things, and I had a long train ride to ponder it all. And, dear, ever since I arrived, you’ve looked rather miserable. Not the attitude of a content and happy soon-to-be bride.”

“Oh, Ma.” Elizabeth covered her face with her hands. “I can’t stop thinking about him. But you don’t know the whole story. You don’t know about Jacob, or the David I know…”

“No, I don’t know. But I do know that Casey’s a good man, raised by a good family. One he’s chosen to stay with in order to make things right. To help them.” She stared up at the sky, where a few stars peeked out from the clouds. “You brought him home.”

Homesickness writhed through Elizabeth like a prisoner begging for release. Lifting her gaze to the water—a dark inkwell waiting to be used—she felt her heartbeat quicken. Ever since she had agreed to marry Joe, she’d been caught up in her own emotions. She had been fearful of the future. She had carried bitterness inside her heart toward her own brother. She had forgotten God’s tender mercies as she let herself be consumed by her own plans, her own confusion.