Forever This Time (3 page)

Josie nodded, trying to clear visions of tubes and beeping machines out of her head.

“He's—I don't know.”

“Tough thing, this.” Ben nodded. “I imagine it scared the bejeebers right out of you to see him like that.”

“I couldn't—couldn't stay, Ben.” Josie fought to keep a hitch out of her voice. “It's been forever, but I just … couldn't.”

He put an arm around her shoulder, hugging her close. “You will, Twinkle-toes. You will. One step at a time. And till you're ready, you just hang out with Ole Ben. It'll help break up the quiet around here.”

Josie laughed softly as the cacophony of park noise filtered down the hill. Snowflake Village was
never
quiet.

“Hey! Do you want a grape Popsicle?” He popped up from his stool, heading for the ancient fridge in the corner of the garage. “I got a brand-new box!”

Josie's mouth opened in surprise. “You still keep grape Popsicles down here?”

“Yep.” He opened the freezer door. “But the boxes last too long now. Nobody to help me eat 'em. Want one?”

“You bet I do!” Josie laughed. “I haven't had one since … forever.”

He strode back across the floor and handed her the Popsicle. “So I don't s'pose you've seen Ethan yet?”

“Not yet.” Again the softball threatened her throat.

“And you're not avoiding him by sitting on my stool and eating up my Popsicles?” His eyebrows curved high on his forehead.

“Definitely not.”

“Then I guess you can stay for a bit.” He grinned at her, then reached out to tweak her nose like he'd always done. “It's good to see you, Twinkle-toes. I think Ethan might even agree with me, once he gets over the shock of having you here.”

Josie crossed her arms carefully. “That's probably a bit of a stretch, Ben.”

“You'll be fine. Don't you worry. You're both all grown up now. Things change.”

She pushed out a nervous breath, kicking at a pebble on the floor. “Did you—did you ever tell him what happened before I left, Ben?”

Ben was quiet as he fiddled with a wrench. “That been bothering you all these years?”

She nodded slowly, cringing as she shrugged.

“No, Twink. I never told him about that night.”

He looked at her, studying her eyes for a long moment. “But he might know more than you think, honey. I think you'd best be prepared for that.”

 

Chapter 3

Later that afternoon, Ethan rubbed his eyes as he pushed back from the computer screen on his desk. He'd tried to prioritize all of the items in his and Andy's to-do piles, but fourteen of them were still vying for first place, and it was already closing time.

When Josie's mom had called earlier with the news about Andy, he'd assured her that he could hold down the fort until they knew more. Now, after only one day, he wasn't so sure. Between the two of them, the Snowflake Village business office ran like a well-oiled machine, but that was because both he and Andy dedicated far more than the standard forty hours a week to the job.

Could Molly fill in for a few days?
No.
He discarded the thought almost as quickly as it came into his head. Between working at her parents' restaurant and holding down the director's desk at Avery's House, she already struggled to find a spare moment. The fact that she'd squeezed in a blind date on a Friday morning was testament to that.

Diana's parting words this morning had hung over his head all day.
Josie's coming home, and you and I both know how she feels about hospitals. Maybe she could help out? Just get us through the weekend, at least?

Ethan sighed. The only place Josie hated more than hospitals was the park, so odds were slim that she'd ever agree to it even if he'd said yes.

Which he hadn't.

He glanced out the window and watched as employees ushered lingering guests toward the exit, then shook his head as he realized his eyes were searching for Josie's long, curly hair. But there was no way she was here. No matter what the circumstances, he couldn't imagine her ever stepping through Snowflake Village's igloo entrance by choice.

She'd made a clean cut ten years ago—of the park, of her parents, of Molly … of him.

He pulled open the bottom drawer of his desk, sliding out the double-framed picture that had sat in there since he'd taken it off the wall long ago. He and Josie smiled out of the left frame, sunburned and happy, arms linked around each other at the lake. On the right was a photo Josie probably hoped had disappeared a long time ago.

In it, she wore a ridiculously huge princess costume and was sitting in a giant timpani, laughing, having just fallen off the park's stage during her first-ever solo. He'd never forget how the other actors had ad-libbed their way through the rest of the scene while trying to maneuver her back out of the huge drum, like they'd planned for her to actually fall into it.

Ethan smiled as he touched the photo. She'd kill him if she ever found out it still existed, but it reminded him of happier years, happier summers … a happier Josie.

He sighed as he pushed his mug into the Keurig machine on the wide windowsill and plucked the darkest possible coffee from the rotating holder beside it. It was going to be a long night.

As it brewed and trickled, he thought he heard the sound of a woman's shoes coming up the stairway.

Ah hell.

Molly didn't wear shoes that sounded like that.

The heels clacked softly down the hallway toward the office, then slowed just outside the open doorway. He looked up just as Josie lifted her hand to knock on the door, and thanked God he hadn't yet picked up his coffee. If he had, it would have scalded his entire bottom half as he dropped the mug.

Though he'd only had hours to do so, he thought he'd steeled himself for this moment. But seeing Josie framed in the doorway, he realized he hadn't.
At all.
The damn woman had occupied his dreams for more than ten years, but now that she was up close, he could see that eighteen-year-old Josie had grown up. A lot.

Where her body had been a collection of sweet new curves covered by innocent pink and peach cotton, her clothes now exuded an urban vibe. She looked like a model, slim and strong, from her high-heeled shoes to her skirt, wide black belt, and dark gray sleeveless blouse. In place of the curls he'd touched a thousand times, her hair was now sleek, shiny … straight. She probably thought she looked the height of fashion, but to him, it looked like she could use a few of Mama Bellini's burgers to put some meat on her bones.

Dammit. She still used that apple-y shampoo, though. He could smell it, and immediately he was eighteen again, sitting on a blanket by the lake with her in his arms.

The silence stretched on just long enough to be completely uncomfortable as he stared at Josie. In her face, he could see the same mermaid-green eyes he'd loved, but they looked more vivid now, accented with eyeliner and mascara. Her nose still turned up at the end, and to his chagrin, it still made him want to run his index finger down it so she'd playfully slap his hand away.

“Josie.” It was all he could do to force the word out of his mouth.

He saw her swallow hard before she spoke.

“Ethan,” she whispered. Her hand was still poised in the air, ready to knock, but it looked like she'd forgotten it was there. He took some comfort in knowing she looked as off-kilter as he was. His innards felt like a Tilt-A-Whirl on high speed, but he'd be damned if he'd let her know that.

He took a slow breath, studying her while he tried to gain control of his voice. What the hell was he supposed to say to her? Every line he'd rehearsed for the past eight hours fled his brain.

Finally she saved him by speaking first. “I—I don't think I know what to say.”

“That makes two of us.”

“Did Mom tell you she asked me to help out this weekend? Here? At the park?” Her voice was sort of catchy and nervous, which surprised him.

He shook his head.
Diana had already asked her?

“Oh.” Her eyes flitted around the office. “Um … well … she did. Which is … strange. I know. It's all strange.” The smile she attempted barely reached her cheeks, let alone her eyes. “But anyway, she did.”

“I see.” Ethan hated himself for enjoying her discomfort, but there had to be
some
karma in the universe, right?

“So…” She waved her fingers vaguely. “I'm sorry. This is sort of
Twilight Zone
-ish. You weren't expecting me. Obviously. But here I am, I guess.”

“Here you are.” He sat back down in his chair and threaded his fingers together behind his head, trying to give off a relaxed, unconcerned vibe. Yeah, that was it. He'd play it super-casual, unaffected. Definitely
wouldn't
play it like it was. “It's been a while.”

Josie dropped her hand slowly. “I, um, I—” She pointed to Andy's chair. “Do you mind if I sit for a second?”

Ethan motioned with his hand.
Sure. Sit down. Waltz into my office ten years after you went all
Runaway Bride
and never looked back. Make yourself right at home.

He waited while she settled her purse on the floor and adjusted her high-heeled shoes. Though her hair and body had changed, her voice was still the same one that had haunted his dreams for years now. He hated himself for wanting to keep her talking.

“How's your dad doing this afternoon?”

“Not great. Sounds like it could be … pretty bad.” She took a shaky breath as she smoothed her skirt.

“How does he look?”

“Terrible.”

Ethan studied her as she adjusted her skirt again, pulled off a stray piece of dark hair, rubbed her heel. Had she actually gone through those hospital doors? He could hardly believe it.

“I stayed for a while, but wasn't quite ready for the Mom-reunion … so I came here, I guess.” She gestured at the metal desks faced toward each other like Ethan and Andy were
Law & Order
partners, then vaguely out the windows. “I walked around a little. Things here look pretty much the same.”

“That's kind of the way it goes here, but I'm sure you remember.”

He swore he was trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but it wasn't quite working. For God's sake, all he wanted to do right now was gather her in his arms and make the scared look on her face go away, wanted to kiss her full lips and see if she still wore strawberry lip gloss, wanted to—
ah hell
—wanted to do a whole lot more than kiss.

Her voice broke through his thoughts. “So … what can I do to help? Till Dad's … better?”

Right
. No way was he going the self-imposed-torture route here. No
way
was he going to let her get under his skin by invading his space—or his brain.

He cleared his throat. “We're fine here. You should be at the hospital with your parents.”

“Mom said you'd say that.”

“She was right. I can handle things for now. You need to be with your family.”
Definitely not here, sitting in your dad's chair, looking like an all-grown-up figment of my imagination.

He sat up straighter, leaning on his desk like he needed to get back to his big, important job. “We've got things covered here.”

Maybe she wouldn't notice the piles of work sitting on both desks. Or realize he was fabricating his confident voice in order to get rid of her before the scent of her had his thoughts spinning in a direction he couldn't handle.

She sighed. “There's nothing I can do at the hospital except sit and wait for news.”

“Isn't that kind of what families do in these situations? Doesn't make it easier, but it's normal.”

She tilted her head, frown lines crowding her forehead. “We both know there's nothing normal about my family, Ethan. Surely that hasn't changed much since I left.”

“You might be surprised.”

She nodded slowly, but he could tell she didn't believe him. A tiny, sympathetic part of him understood her reticence. However, a huge,
un
sympathetic part of him wanted her out of this office. Now.

“So what can I do to help?” She was rubbing her heels, which were probably just about raw if she'd been walking around the hilly park for more than ten minutes in those stupid shoes. The Josie he remembered wore nothing but flip-flops from April to October. He wondered when she'd traded them in for these nonsensical high-heeled things.

“Nothing. I promise you everything's perfectly under control here. You can assure Diana that Ben and I are handling things.”

“You can't run an entire theme park by yourself, can you?”

“Honestly, Josie, it'd take me longer to get you trained back up than it would be to just do it all myself.”

He saw her lips tighten as she prepared a response, then saw her chest rise slowly as if she was taking a calming breath. He was surprised to find himself a little disappointed at her control. The old Josie would have bitten back with a retort, but this older, apparently more mature version simply pushed her shoulders back and looked out the window.

“I know that this is terribly awkward, and believe me—I am no happier to be here than you are to see me, but I
am
here, and I would much rather be helpful at the park than sit in a waiting room trying to pray to a god I lost sight of a long time ago, Ethan. Please just let me help.”

Ethan sat back in his chair, studying her for a long moment. “Josie, I'm really trying my hardest to be nice because I know Diana sent you, but please don't insult me by pretending you have an ounce of desire to be here. You hate this place, and we both know it.”

“I don't—” She drew in another careful breath. “I told Mom I'd help here. She doesn't need the stress of worrying about the park, on top of Dad's situation right now.”