Forbidden Prescription: A Stepbrother Romance (23 page)

“Do you love him, Alice?”

I am startled by his question. “I-I do.”

“Did you ever really love me?”

“Of course I did, Richard. I still do,” I answer without hesitation.

“But not like you love him?”

My shoulders sag in resignation. He hit the nail right on the head and I can’t deny it. “You are right.”

He nods. “I understand Alice. I’m hurt but I can’t even be mad at you. Everyone deserves happiness. If Damon makes you happy, go for it.”

I stare at him in disbelief. He is so calm and understanding, it boggles my mind. “I’m so sorry, Richard. I never meant to hurt you, I swear.”

He walks forward and plants a kiss on my forehead. “It’s okay. I’ll catch a flight back home as soon as the sun comes up.”

“No, Richard, you don’t have to do that. You can stay and we can fly back together.”

“Thanks, babe, but I really can’t stay.”

I smile slightly when I hear his usual endearment. I guess it’s a sign that he really doesn’t hate my guts. I slip the ring he gave me off of my finger and offer it to him.

“Keep it.”

“I can’t,” I say.

He shrugs, “There’s nothing I can do with it now except sell it. I don’t want to do that. Keep it as a gift, that way you know you will always have a friend in me.”

My heart melts and I embrace him. “You are going to make some girl very happy some day.”

I leave his room not able to stay any longer. I can’t bear to see the sadness in his eyes and know that I am the cause of it. I pad down the hallway to my room. I stop in front of my door. I give in to temptation and turn to make my way to Damon’s room. As I lift my hand to knock, the door swings open and I nearly make contact with his broad chest. I drop my hand and raise my brows at him in question.

He lifts his shoulders. “I have been waiting for you. I heard your footsteps,” he explains.

“I did it. I am no longer engaged.”

He lifts his hand to caress my cheek. “Are you okay?” He asks. I nod and he stands aside to let me in.

E
pilogue

I
push
my apartment door open with my foot. I quickly walk to the counter to deposit my bags of groceries. This is the first time in almost two months that I have invested the time to buy food. I haven’t had much interest in eating or anything else for the matter. I have only been able to drag myself to work every day and back home to spend the evening and nights crying.

I have been a walking advertisement for depression since Damon broke my heart
again
over the Christmas Holiday. It seems like it is becoming a trend for him to cause me misery at Christmas time. I don’t think I will ever be able to enjoy that particular holiday ever again. I begin to put away the groceries. I can’t help but go back in time like I have done just about every day.

After I broke off my engagement with Richard, everyone demanded to know what had happened between us. I let it spill that it was because Damon and I loved each other. I can still remember the deafening silence as my grandparents, mom and Jared stared at me in shock. If it wasn’t so damn embarrassing, it would have be comical. The expressions on their faces were priceless.

Damon had strolled in a few minutes later and all eyes had swung to him. He had taken in the faces of everyone in the room, including my very flushed one, and he had known that I spilled the beans.

The look of anger that he had sent my way when Jared said, “son, we need to talk” will forever be etched in my memory.

After berating me for not keeping what we had done a secret, he declared that he didn’t see how we could have a life together.

“I don’t think things between us will work Alice. We are so far away from each other. Plus I think your mom hates me for corrupting her daughter.”

My eyes have widened, “How would she know that we slept together. I didn’t mention anything about that.”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “My dad managed to get that piece of information out of me.”

“And you are angry with
me
for not keeping a secret?” I spat.

We had parted ways—him angry and me brokenhearted.

I have decided that it is full time for me to pull myself together and stop wallowing in self-pity.

I have started with having actual food in my house. As if I wasn’t thin enough, I have managed to lose a few pounds. My mother was worried that I was anorexic.

I can’t let Damon ruin my life any longer.

“The bastard hasn’t even called,” I mutter bitterly as I shove a bag of lettuce into the fridge. “I am so over him.”

* * *

I
step
out of the shower and run out the door. Someone is knocking incessantly. “Alright hold your horses, I’m coming!” I finally reach the door. “Who is it?”

“It’s Damon, Alice.”

I gasp and my heart begins to pound faster. Okay, so maybe I’m really not over him. I am tempted to walk away from the door and leave him out there. But I swing the door open.

“What are you doing here and what do you want?” I ask angrily. I can’t help but rake my eyes over him. He is gorgeous as usual but his eyes are blood shot. It looks like he has been sleep-deprived.

His eyes devour me.

I self-consciously pull the towel wrapped around my body tighter.

“Can I come in?” he asks.

I reluctantly stand aside and allow him to enter. He brushes past me and I fill my nostrils with his masculine scent. God, I have missed him. I give myself a mental shake, remembering that I’m supposed to be angry with him.

He turns around to face me. “Alice, you look amazing,” he frowns, “A bit thinner but beautiful. Is it my fault that you haven’t been eating?”

I give him the hardest glare that I can muster. “Don’t flatter yourself, Ryder. I’m eating just fine,” I utter the lie though my teeth. I can’t even think about food when I’m so busy stressing over
him
. “What do you want?”

“I came to apologize.” His expression is pained and upon closer expression I can see stress written all over him. In fact his cheeks look slightly hollow as if he, too, has been neglecting food. My heart constricts to see him like this. But I harden myself. He doesn’t deserve any sympathy from me.

I snort rudely. “You’re just full of apologies, aren’t you? Don’t bother, Damon. I don’t need you to apologize to me only to end up hurting me again down the line. So, you have done what you came here to do, you can leave now.”

“I’m not going anywhere until you hear me out.” He grasps my shoulders. “I was angry and afraid, Alice. I didn’t want our parents to find out about us so soon. You should have told me that you planned to tell them.”

I roll my eyes in annoyance. “I didn’t plan anything. They demanded to know what happened between Richard and I. I couldn’t lie to them so it just came out. I apologize for that.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore. I don’t care who knows about us. All I care about is getting you back.”

My breath hitches. I am tempted to throw myself in his arms and tell him he can have me, but I fight the urge. I am not going to make this easy for him, not after the way he just left me hanging.

He wraps his arms around me, always able to read my mind. My mind may be warring with my heart at the moment, but one of those sides desperately wants his arms around me.

I shrug out of his embrace, letting my mind win for now.

“I don’t appreciate you playing games with me Damon. You tell me you love me, we have mind-blowing sex, and then you just drop me at a moment’s notice? I don’t want to go through the ringer with you anymore.” I glower at him. “I have just decided to let you go and move on with my life and then you appear to ruin everything.”

He clenches and unclenches his jaw several times. “I do love you, Alice. I was just afraid that I couldn’t give you everything you deserve… marriage and a family. So I ran. But I’ve been in hell since I left you. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I can’t focus on work. I am haunted by the hurt I saw in your eyes before I left.” His fingers caress my jaw and I close my eyes, leaning into his light touch.

“I can’t afford to let you hurt me again,” I say in a voice barely above a whisper.

“I won’t.”

I stare into his eyes. I see regret, sadness and pain there. My heart melts. I can deny him no longer. The war within me has ended, and all of me aches to comfort him, and in doing so find the comfort I so badly need. The comfort only he can provide.

“I’ve missed you,” I admit.

His shoulders relax. “I’ve missed you too.” He reaches for me and I go willingly into his arms.

I wind my hands around his neck and stretch up to kiss him. Our tongues clash as we kiss with fervor. We make up for almost two months apart. He lifts me to him and I wrap my legs around his waist.

He strides to the nearest flat surface, which is my dining room table. He deposits me down and pulls at his zipper. I tear wildly at his shirt, desperate to feel his bare skin beneath my palms. He is standing between my thighs half-naked. Not bothering to take off the rest of his clothes he pulls open my towel and plunges into me.

I cry out his name and throw my head back. Our lovemaking is fast and wild—nothing like it has ever been before. We are both attempting to fill the longing that has been in our hearts for weeks and what had been a fervent but mostly innocent passion is now a tormented and aching hunger we can only sate by diving deeper into each other.

We fulfill each other with our bodies, healing our souls, and when we've both satiated ourselves at our peaks and from our spurned, hurting hearts, our bodies stay entangled.

We are lying on my couch a short while later. I am sprawled partially on top of him. “That was wild,” I whisper.

“I’m sorry. It’s just that I haven’t touched you for so long, I couldn’t wait.”

I lift my head to grin down at him, “Who says I’m complaining?”

He chuckles and pulls me into a kiss.

I push away from him slightly and frown. “How long will you be here for?” My heart aches when I think about him leaving and going back to Michigan.

“I took two weeks off. My bags are in my car. We can spend the time together and figure out what we are going to do about our little distance problem.”

I lift an eyebrow, “How did you know I would let you stay here?”

He grins. “I wouldn’t have left no matter what you said. I was willing to sleep in my car outside your door if I had to. I figured I would manage to wear you down eventually.”

I giggle. “I’m glad you came. I know I said I was trying to move on, but I really don’t think I could have.” I glance at him. “Have you spoken to your dad?”

“I have and I even managed to get your mom to speak to me again, so we are all good. I think they are over us sleeping together by now. He rolls over and pins me beneath him. “I meant what I said, Alice. I
don’t
care what anyone else says, we’re going to be together.”

I smile. “Good, I don’t care either. I love you and it’s about damn time you figured out that we should be together. I don’t know what took you so long. It seems men take forever to figure things out,” I add jokingly.

He roars out a laugh and bends his head to show me how much he loves me.

C
hapter 1
: The Big Mess

O
ften in life
, we meet too many people. Have you ever tried figuring out why you bump into someone? That time when you stand in the queue, waiting for your cup of coffee, and you end up striking up a conversation with a random guy? Or even that moment when you cross four cities and bump into a guy who had been patiently waiting for you—wearing a pink shirt just because it’s your favorite color—ever thought what those moments really mean?

Life is nothing but a series of experiences and planned coincidences. You think we plan every move, but someone up there has it all figured out long before we know what playing the game is all about.

* * *

T
he sun seemed
to be in no mood to wake up in the cloudy, misty, morning sky. It wasn’t winter yet, but one could feel the mist in the morning air, as if winter was knocking and announcing its arrival. I turned over on my bed and saw that it was nearly six o’clock on the bright little alarm clock on my nightstand. I usually got up at five every morning, as I had strings of chores to do. However, I woke up mostly so that I could connect with the morning air.

If you have ever been up at five in the morning and stolen a glimpse of the rising sun, you would know what I am talking about.

I am 31, single, alone but not quite lonely, and have had a life that makes me smile.

Of course, on such days when even the sun was busy playing peek-a-boo, I wished to have that one pair of arms wherein I could just melt and forget everything else.

But sadly, I was alone in my New York City apartment, so I decided that I could cut myself a little break. I wanted to roll over in bed one more time and sneak in an extra hour of sleep. There were days when I was tired of working so hard that even if it meant waking up late, I wanted to do something for myself.

With these thoughts, I rolled over my empty bed and tossed the extra pillows aside and allowed myself the comfort of some more sleep.

* * *

I
woke
up to a call on my phone. It was from Adam, one of my best friends back from high school. I was involved with three NGOs, and one of them was run by Adam’s fiancé. I sensed that it had to be something urgent if it was a call from him so early in the morning.

As I picked up the call, I could hear the despair in his voice. I was immediately on alert, and all the laziness in my body disappeared in an instant.

“Lacie, we have some really bad news,” he said in a serious tone.

“What happened, Adam?”

“I am afraid things are going to change too much. Les was in tears the whole night. I thought of calling you earlier, but it was too hard to console her,” he said, sounding like he was trying to fight off his own tears.

“What’s wrong, Adam? Is she alright? Are you two okay?”

I was genuinely concerned for the two of them, as Les was perhaps one of the sweetest people I had ever met. They both looked perfect for each other, and the last thing I wanted to hear just as I was set to start my day was the two of them breaking up.

“We’re still together, if that’s what you were thinking. But no, something’s come up with the Golden Ray Charity. Could you meet us at Starbucks in an hour—the one across from my office?”

“Yeah, of course. I’ll see you soon.”

I stared at the phone screen and wondered what could possibly be so upsetting that would make Les cry the whole night. There were a hundred thoughts that came to my mind, and not one of them looked pretty. I realized something had to be done, and I threw the blankets off and decided to get ready.

After showering, I quickly took out my long-sleeved red dress from my wardrobe and didn’t bother applying makeup. I had a very dark complexion, and I was one of those girls who were comfortable in her own skin. I was never a huge fan of loud makeup because I believed in the beauty of the soul.

I called Adam on the way, informing him that I was almost there, and he let me know that he was already there.

That day, the roads were busier than usual, and I was getting paranoid. I wanted to know the real reason as to why Les was so messed up. As I kept sitting in my car, waiting for the roads to clear, I couldn’t help but remember the first time I met Les.

* * *

A
dam
and I were hanging out together, eating at one of the local burger joints a couple of years ago, when he saw a girl checking him out and gossiping with her friends. Adam was black-skinned like me, but unlike me, he was never comfortable with his skin color. He had his own reasons, as he had been bullied by a lot of people all throughout school. He was so sure that the girl was mocking him for his skin color, and I saw him shrugging his shoulder and retracting in his seat. It hurt my heart to see him like this, and that day, I had asked him to go and stand up. I told him that he had to earn his own respect or else he would never be able to look the world in the eye.

“Speak, Adam. You deserve better.”

“She hates me. Look at her. She is sparkly white and mocking me in front of her friends. You know, Lacie, I’ve seen her in college too. She is in another academic building, but I often see her giggling whenever I pass by. Why can’t people grow up?” he said, frustrated.

Adam was literally on the verge of tears, and I knew that he had to do it this time. I put my foot down and told him he had to do it for me; for every black friend he had. He was ready, and before I could let the moment escape, I pushed him.

Adam went straightaway to the group and didn’t wait, pause, or anything. He just said, “It is wrong of you to pick on guys on the basis of color. So what if I am dark-skinned? Do you think you can just sit there and mock me? I wouldn’t have said anything to you; but over there, that girl, you broke her heart and she is my friend, almost like my sister. I am sorry but you can’t do this. You can call me names, even though it hurts, because you are beautiful. I like you so much.”

I stood there with my mouth wide-open. I was so dumbstruck at the way he changed his speech, and I had no way of knowing that he actually had a crush on her.

I was sure that the girls were going to make fun of him, and I jumped up to rescue him; but before I could even reach them, the beautiful girl said, “What! Do you like me? For real? I mean, I wasn’t mocking you. You look sexy. I was just asking my friends if I should go to your table and ask you, but I thought you two were together.”

“Oh! Who, Lacie? We’re like siblings. Nothing romantic between us. I am Adam by the way,” he said as he reached out for a handshake.

“I am Leslie. Call me Les. Do you mind having a cup of coffee?”

The rest, as they say, was history.

It was a very cute story, and my heart melted. We three started hanging out, and I found a great friend in Les. She was really sweet and had a very beautiful heart. It was so wrong of us to judge and say that she would discriminate people on the basis of color. She was in the humanities department and was doing a research paper. She decided to rope the two of us in, as she would cover the paper on the ethnic mix. Our friendship started from there, and even today, there has been no looking back.

* * *

K
nowing
that Les was in tears made my heart sad. If there was one person that truly deserved to be happy, it had to be her. I quickly parked my car and walked inside the coffee shop. They were both seated at the same table we often frequented. Les was crying, and her eyes were swollen.

“Hey Les, What happened? You look so...” I started.

I couldn’t even complete my sentence as she enveloped me in a big hug and broke down. I didn’t know what the problem was yet, but I swore that I would fix it, no matter what.

Adam later told me that the orphanage at Borough Street was being taken down. There was a huge business firm that had bought the whole land. They decided to take down the orphanage and expand their business by constructing an office there. Les had written to them because the orphanage was the legacy of her grandfather and remained the only memory she had of him. However, she didn’t hear back from them, and yesterday evening, she had received a letter asking her to evacuate the place in a month.

I was shattered to hear the news and was equally devastated. I had been to the Borough street orphanage myself and spent quite a lot of time there, volunteering to be around the kids. The little kids would become homeless, and even though they could be moved to some other place, it was a huge orphanage, and the kids would be separated from each other. There was so much at stake, and I couldn’t understand how some people could be so blind just because all they really cared about was money.

I promised that I would take care of it. I had some connections in the real estate market and even knew a few lawyers. Even if I had to make use of all my connections, I promised to do it, because this is what really mattered. Friends needed to stand up for friends, and I was willing to walk through hell because I knew how hard it was to grow up without parents.