For the Love of Gracie (33 page)

I stepped forward, placed both my hands on the plank to steady myself for a moment, and hoped that my hands would stop shaking.  I lifted the gun, realizing that it was heavier than I expected.  I wrapped my hands around it, careful to place my finger alongside the barrel and not on the trigger itself. The green silhouette of a man was about six feet from me.  With one last deep breath, I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger.

The recoil of the gun was more than I had expected. It snapped back
, hurting the space between my thumb and forefinger.  As it went off, I screamed at the sound, the recoil, the feeling in my chest.  I sat the gun down and backed away, bumping into Ashton's chest.  I whipped around, his face showed deep concern at my reaction. 

"You okay, Gracie?" he mouthed. 

I shook my head and began to cry.  He pulled me into his arms, waving Derrick and Mary Jane to go on without us.  Ashton took my hand and led me back out to the lobby area. 

He removed my headset and wiped my tears with his thumb.  "Sweetie, talk to me."

"I feel like I killed someone just now.  I don’t like that feeling.  You know that green silhouette man might have a family." 

Ash chuckled. "If he does, Derrick and MJ are taking care of them now so they won't have to grieve him."

I smacked his chest playfully. "That isn’t funny!" He laughed as he pulled me against his chest and kissed my hair.

"I'll sit out here
and we'll let them finish up," he said. 

I shook my head. "Let me try one more time." 

With our hearing and eye protection in place, he led me back in.  Derrick smiled when he saw us come back.  He patted my shoulder to show his support.  Ash stood behind me this time.  The gun lay on the plank again.  He stepped behind me, wrapped his arms around me tightly and kissed my neck. 

He yelled out, "You can do this, bug. I believe in you." 

Lifting the gun again, I resumed the position I had before, aimed for the green silhouette of a man and fired.  All the same feelings erupted in me.  I set it down and turned to Ash, shaking my head in defeat.  He kissed my forehead and told Derrick we'd be outside. 

Ash waited in the lobby while I went to wash the gun powder off my hands.  The small bathroom felt as though there was no air circulating. I glanced in the mirror and noticed my face was pale and clammy.  My hands wouldn’t stop shaking. My chest heaved and I began to sob, uncontrollably. 

With my back pressed against the wall, I slid down to the floor and pulled my knees into my chest. 

A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door and a woman's voice called out, "Ma'am?" 

I sniffed back the tears and cleared my throat. "I'll be out in a second." 

I scrambled to get up off the floor.  I grabbed a paper towel
and wet it to clean my face. 

The woman smiled sympathetically at me when I stepped from the restroom.  "Are you alright?" 

I nodded and searched the room for Ashton.  He had his back turned and was examining a gun with the man behind the counter.  His head twisted in my direction and his face filled with concern. He apologized to the man and sprinted over to me. 

"Baby, what's wrong?" he asked as he stroked my cheek with his thumb.

"Had a bit of a breakdown for a second."  His arms wrapped around me and as soon as they did, I felt better. I pressed my face against his chest.  "You make everything better Ash." 

He sighed. "I feel the same about you." 

"Gracie?"  I turned and Mary Jane was running toward me.  "What happened?" 

I shook my head. "I had a moment, that's all.  I'm good now." 

Derrick smiled. "You did good for your first time, Gracie.  Be proud.  What do you say I treat everyone to lunch?" 

Ashton spoke up first, "If you're paying, I'm in.  Who wants a big steak?" 

Derrick punched his arm. "Thanks, bro."  They laughed as we headed to the parking lot. 

Chapter Twenty-Seven

Standing at the car, I was relaxed in Ash’s arms as we gazed into each other’s eyes, smiling.

The next few moments happened in slow motion. His eyes drifted upward, his face paled. Shock engulfed him.

His mouth opened and he shouted, “Derrick!”

In the next moment, I heard the rapid pops and felt my body pushed to the ground.

Ashton’s body lay on top of me. Screams echoed around us.  My eyes were closed, afraid of what was happening. Before I fell, I had heard Mary Jane scream Derrick’s name in unison with Ash.  Ashton wasn’t moving on top of me. Dread washed over me as I began to panic that he'd been hurt. My eyes flew open as I pushed against his weight.  I was pinned to the ground and it was suffocating me. 

He tightened his grip around me and whispered, “Stay down, Gracie. Don’t move.”

“Are you hurt?” I whimpered. 

He moved to look me in the eyes as he responded, “No. I’m fine, I have to check on Derrick.”

I grabbed his arms. “Don’t leave me.”

His face scrunched in pain. “Baby, I don’t want to, but I don’t know who’s hurt.”

I nodded my head. “Were those gunshots?" 

He nodded slightly.  "Did you see who was shooting?”

His eyes grew fierce with anger. “All I saw was Hudson with a gun.”

I cried out, “What!”

He quickly covered my mouth, sending me into panic as I quivered from being held down.  I struggled against his hold, this was all too familiar of a feeling.  I had to remember it was Ash and he'd never hurt me that way. 

He whispered in my ear, “Baby, I’m sorry I know you are scared.  I know you don’t like being held down.  I need you to be quiet so he doesn’t know where you are.  I’ll be nearby, I need to see about my brother.  Do you trust me?”

I nodded and he moved his hand. When he stood up, I slid closer to the car for protection.

As I searched for what happened, the first thing my eyes fell upon was Mary Jane’s shirt, now streaked in blood. She seemed devastated and scared. Ash put his arms around her as she cried.  He turned and pointed at me.  She relaxed and ran to be by my side. 

Ashton bent over Derrick in a hug, he came back up with blood on his shirt. I turned to Mary Jane.

"Is Derrick alright?" 

She wrapped her arms around my neck and cried.  My eyes found Ashton again; he was sitting with Derrick's head in his lap.  One of the bystanders was on the phone, hopefully calling 911.  I saw no sign of Hudson. 

I patted MJ's back. "Tell me what happened." 

She sat back, "It all happened so fast.  Derrick was about to kiss me. The next thing I know, he knocked me to the ground and I heard the gunshots.  He's been shot, Gracie." 

I began to hyperventilate, she added, "He's alive.  We have to get him to a hospital." 

Ashton waved us over. 

I ran to him and knelt beside him.  "Is he alright?"  The sirens sounded in the background.  I was growing tired of sirens and hospitals in my life lately. 

Derrick was shot in the stomach; Ashton was keeping pressure on the wound.  His eyes were misty. "I think he'll be fine. We have to get him to the hospital soon." 

My eyes drifted to the crowd standing nearby.  I looked to see what they were staring at.  Ashton's hand brushed my cheek. "It's all over, baby." 

My eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "What do you mean?" 

He pointed at the crowd.  I could see something on the ground, a body. 

"Hudson.  Derrick was able to get a shot off and kill him before he could hurt anyone else." 

I had never been someone to be happy when a person was hurt or killed, but my whole body relaxed in relief. 

The EMT's ran over to take care of Derrick.  Ashton moved back from him to give them space.  He turned to me and wrapped his arms tightly around me. I sobbed into his chest.  He smoothed my hair. "It's over baby. It's going to be fine." 

I looked up into his eyes. "I know.  I feel happy that Hudson is dead, I know that is wrong but…" 

He shook his head. "It's not wrong for you to feel that way.  It's normal, sweetheart.  After all the pain and suffering he caused you, no one will blame you for feeling that way."

The EMT tapped Ashton on the shoulder. "Do you want to ride with your brother in the ambulance?" 

Ashton said, "No. I'll meet you there."

I grabbed his arm. "Go with him.  Mary Jane and I will meet you at the hospital.  We're safe now.  He needs you." 

Ashton kissed my forehead.

"You be careful, bug.  I love you." 

"I love you, Ash."

Mary Jane was still sitting against the car, slightly in shock.  "We're going to meet Derrick and Ash at the hospital. You ready to go?" 

She kept quiet for most of the ride.  At one point she scared me by gasping out loud.  I slammed on the brakes. "What?"

She grabbed at her chest. "I'm sorry, Gracie.  I didn’t mean to scare you." 

I pulled to the side of the road.  Her eyes were glazed with tears.

"What are we going to do about Katelyn?" 

I sighed. "Let me call Ashton." 

He picked up with panic in his voice, he asked, "What's wrong?" 

I sighed. "We're fine baby, stop worrying about me." 

He chuckled. "I told you I'm a worrier. What's up?" 

"Did you call your parents and tell them about Derrick?"

He cursed. "Not yet.  I don’t want to worry Katie." 

I agreed. "Mary Jane thought of that, too. Would you like us to go by there and talk to them?" 

He was quiet for a moment and said, "No, I'll call them.  Let me call you back. I may need your help finding a babysitter." 

When I hung up the phone, I turned to MJ again.  She was staring out the window. 

I brushed her hair off her face. "You okay, sweets?"  She nodded without looking at me.  "Talk to me MJ." 

She turned and sighed. "Gracie, why is it that we have to struggle so much to find happiness?" 

That was a question I didn’t have an answer to. 

She explained further, "Look at what you had to go through to find Ashton.  Look at what you're still going through.  Sometimes I don’t feel as though it's worth all of this." 

That sounded ominous, "What isn't worth it?" 

She turned back to the window. "Life." 

"MJ, that sounds like suicide talk." 

She turned to me and shook her head. "No, I'd never commit suicide.  Nothing in life is that bad.  It just that it seems like we go through so much pain to get to happiness sometimes." 

I felt ashamed when she said that and she noticed.  "Gracie, what is it?" 

I decided she should know. "A few weeks ago, I reached the lowest point I've ever been.  I wrote notes to Cameron and Ashton.  I had a handful of pills ready to chase them with a bottle of Jack Daniels.  If Ashton hadn't sent me the sweetest text I've ever received…well we wouldn’t be talking right now." 

I turned to face her. Her mouth was agape and the tears ran down her face fully now.

"How could you, Gracie?" she yelled. 

"It was selfish, I know," I admitted. 

She crossed her arms over her chest. "So selfish.  What about Angel or me?  We've always vowed to be there for one another no matter what. You should've talked to us." 

I cringed. "You don’t know everything, MJ." 

Her eyebrow rose skeptically. "What do I not know?" 

I took a deep breath and whispered, "Hudson raped me that night too." 

She gasped. "No!" 

I nodded and she leaned forward to hug me.  "Honey, why didn’t you tell me?" 

I sniffed back tears. "I didn’t tell anyone at first. I freaked out on Ash, so I had to tell him. I wanted to keep it from Cameron. Again, that didn’t last long.  I couldn’t bear to tell anyone else." 

"I'm so sorry."  She pounded her fist against the door angrily. "I'm glad he's dead!" 

I grabbed her hand. "Me too.  Let's stop talking about this and go be with our guys."

She smiled sadly. "I like that, 'our guys'.  I really like Derrick a lot, Gracie." 

I pulled back on the road to head toward the hospital.  "I can tell." 

She smiled. "Who'd have thought I could get such a hot guy to want to date me?" 

I lightly smacked her leg. "You're a smokin' hot woman, so stop that talk." 

She laughed. "Yes ma'am."

Chapter Twenty-Eight

When we arrived at the hospital, I spotted Ash waiting outside.  I saw his shoulders relax when he spotted us.  "Uh-oh.  We took too long, he was worried." 

Mary Jane bumped her hip against mine, "That is so sweet."