For Keeps (Aggie's Inheritance) (53 page)

“
That’s how it sounds to me. What you just told me sounded exactly like that. Honestly, if you’d made the same kind of offer to me, I’d have slapped you. Aggie has better self-control than I do.
”

William stabbed his enchilada and found the sensation quite cathartic.
“
She’s in over her head. I just want to help.
”

“
So take the boys
hiking or fishing or on a ride-
along or something. Push the little ones on swings or show up and grill for her. If you’re worried about school, offer to help rearrange the library or help Vannie with her math. Don’t tell Aggie how incompetent she is and try to rescue her from herself.
”

“
So, do you think she’d listen to reason if I apologized, showed her what advantages a man would bring to the family, and asked her to marry me?
”

“
No.
”
Silence hung between them for a few seconds before Tina sighed.
“
William, I’ll be blunt. Aggie isn’t the romantic that I am, but she’s a woman. She’s not going to enter into a relationship like marriage without being ready for everything that comes with it. Have you not thought about what
that kind of
marriage would mean to her? She doesn’t think of you that way, and she knows you don’t think of her like that. No woman wants to give herself to a relationship like that
--
not even someone as practical as Aggie.
”

“
I didn’t think
--”
He cut off his sentence mid- thought.
“
Tina, we can’t think in terms of ourselves. We need to think about the children.
”

“
I’m thinking about the children. I’m thinking about what message this sends to them. I’m thinking about Vannie seeing her aunt sacrifice another piece of her for their family and the guilt it’ll add to that little girl’s heart. I’m thinking about what those boys will learn about marriage
--
it’s just something a guy has to do. Their wives will be a duty instead of a delight. Do you really want to teach an entire family
--
a large one at that
--
that marriage is nothing more than a duty? Do you really want those kids who have already been through so much to become a dysfunctional mess?
”

“
I don’t think
--”

“
Well,
”
Tina interrupted,
“
you’re wrong. I’ve studied enough about this kind of thing to know exactly what’d happen. You know what abnormal relationships do to children. You’ve seen it in your own life. From what you told me about your mother, you should understand this.
”

“
My mom is why I’m doing this! Do you think I want to see someone as sweet and gentle as Aggie reduced to lashing out at children because life is too overwhelming and she’s frazzled beyond endurance? I can’t take it. That house seems almost cursed. Maybe we can break it if she just has the help she needs.
”

Soft sounds of crying reached him.
“
Tina?
”

“
I’m so sorry, William. I can’t imagine the hurt you went through. It’s criminal.
”

“
This isn’t about me, Tina.
”

“
Oh, but William, it is. Don’t you see? Your experiences skewed your perceptions, and you’ve applied that where it doesn’t belong.
”

“
I don’t think so
--”

“
Listen to me. Think about the GIL.
”

“
Who?
”

“
Geraldine Stuart. Aggie calls her the GIL. It stands for ‘grandmother-in-law
”
or ‘Geraldine is livid.’
”

“
Sounds like Aggie.
”

Tina giggled, but a suspicious choke escaped at the end.
“
Geraldine had everything a woman could hope for
--
house, money, one child, position in society, the works. However, she was probably one of the most dysfunctional mothers you’d ever meet. On the other hand, you have Aggie’s parents. Martha Milliken has steadily grown worse over the years. She could never do things like other mothers, always had to take it easy, and yet, that woman never lets her weaknesses control her spirit.
”

“
I can’t imagine Martha Milliken ever losing her cool.
”

“
Well, she does, but only briefly. My point is that Aggie and Mrs. Milliken have something that people like Geraldine and your mother didn’t have.
”

“
What’s that?
”

“
Jesus.
”

William squirmed. He hated it when people used Jesus’ name as if it was a talisman. In fact, he preferred that people not use the name Jesus at all. When speaking of the Lord, he preferred to say Christ. Something about people saying Jesus seemed very affected.

“
William?
”

“
Hmm?
”

“
Why does that make you uncomfortable?
”

“
What?
”
He didn’t understand how she could possibly know how he felt.

“
The fact that Jesus is the difference between Aggie and your mother. You’re a Christian.
”
She hesitated.
“
Aren’t you?
”

“
Sometimes I wonder, Tina.
”
He shoved his half-eaten plate of food across the counter and stepped into the living room, collapsing on the couch.
“
I don’t have the kind of relationship with the Lord that some people do, but I know He has washed me clean. I’m saved, but I don’t have that confidence that I see in people like you or Aggie or Luke.
”

He heard her take a deep breath and steeled himself for a mini-sermon, but she surprised him.
“
William, I think this is more about your past than you think. You’re trying to create the perfect little
--”
She laughed at his chuckle.
“
Ok, not-so-little family in the place that was so horrible for you. You’re trying to redeem the past, but you can’t. It’s over. You can’t fix it.
”

“
I don’t think
--”

“
Ok, then don’t think. I don’t care. I do care about my friend, though, and you won’t do this to her. You won’t put her through this anymore. It’s cruel. She feels like she’s lost one of her best friends.
”

“
Well, it’s not like I’d never speak to her again unless she saw things my way!
”
The idea made him sick. He may not be in love with Aggie, but he did care about their friendship.

“
But as things are, she’s uncomfortable. You put a wedge in the friendship by leaving her with the impression that you think so little of her. I know you didn’t mean to do that, but you did. That was what she got from you, and we both know that Aggie doesn’t go looking to be offended by things.
”

This was true, and he had to admit it to himself.
“
If I tried again and was more careful how I did it, what are the odds that she’d reconsider?
”

“
Are you sure you’re not even a little in love with her? You’re really fixated on this.
”

“
I know it must seem like it, but no. I think I could be maybe… someday. I just can’t let the idea go.
”

“
Maybe you’re just more ready to settle down than you thought.
”

The thought terrified him, but he didn’t want to admit it to Tina.
“
I thought about seeing what Sullivan had to say about it. Maybe he can talk to her.
”

“
William, don’t. Don’t do that to him.
”

“
Do what?
”

“
Are you really that blind? Come on, William.
”

“
What?
”
He felt dense, but he couldn’t understand Tina’s irritation.

“
When Luke arrives, what’s the first thing he does?
”

“
Gets to work?
”

Exasperation fairly crackled across the connection.
“
He looks for Aggie. When she enters a room, what does he do?
”

“
I don’t know. I haven’t been watching him, you know.
”

“
He looks up. No matter what he’s doing, he looks up when she enters. The only other person he does that with is Cari.
”

“
Probably to see what mischief the girl is in now.
”

Giggling, Tina agreed.
“
Yep. Think about it.
”

William felt like a fool.
“
He’s in love with her, isn’t he?
”

“
Yep. You’d have broken his heart if you convinced Aggie to marry you.
”

“
Does she know?
”
William swallowed hard. He hadn’t thought about someone else stepping in as husband and father. He’d decided Aggie’s family needed both and tried to install himself pronto.

“
She does now. You kind of forced Luke to tell her how he feels about her before he thought she was ready to hear it.
”

“
He’s good for her.
”

Tina agreed.
“
He understands her.
”
She cleared her throat.
“
William, the things about Aggie that drive you crazy are the very things that endear her to him.
”

“
Does she love him?
”
His voice was quiet
--
pensive.