For His Forever (16 page)

Nicole apologized again, but it was no use. Kallie’s mind was made up.

***

Nicole was feeling sad on the ride home, even though she finally felt better about things between her and Red.

As Red pulled off the exit about fifteen minutes from their house, Nicole sighed in relief. She needed to get some sleep at this point—she was exhausted and getting back to her own bed would be nice.

Despite her exhaustion, she just couldn’t stop thinking about how quickly she’d rushed to judgment and mistrusted two of the closest people to her. “I understand why Kallie’s angry with me,” Nicole said. “What I don’t understand is how you aren’t angry with me even a little bit after the way I treated you.”

“You’ve been cooped up and it’s been very difficult,” Red told her, trying to alleviate her guilt. “The stress of being diagnosed with preeclampsia along with the history we had with the last pregnancy—who could blame you for having a short fuse?”

“I don’t know. I feel as though I let everyone down.”

“I’m fine, Nicole, and Kallie’s not your responsibility. She’s an adult, and she can handle it. And if she can’t—well—that’s not our problem.”

“I suppose.” Nicole looked out the window.

Red’s hand found hers and he squeezed. “I’m just looking forward to it finally being the two of us alone again.”

“Just us and Chef Roland.”

“Right, I forgot,” Red laughed.

Nicole felt a sudden cramping, painful sensation in her abdomen. She made a face and groaned a little.

“You okay?” Red asked, glancing at her nervously.

“I think so, yeah. Just some heartburn or something. Too much damn stress. I need to try and relax and breathe.” She laid her head back and focused on her breathing, but there was another pain in her stomach—worse this time.

“Ouch.”

“Are you having contractions?”

“I don’t think so.” She put a hand on her stomach. “Contractions are supposed to come on gradually, aren’t they? This is like a sharp pain.” The pain struck again and this time she really cramped up.

Red was alarmed now. “Tell me what’s going on, Nicole.”

“I’m fine—probably just need to get home and get into bed. I’ve been up way too long.”

They drove in silence for another minute or two and then Nicole got another painful contraction, and then a few rapid cramps right after that. She was sweating now, and her heart was galloping in her chest. “I think something’s wrong,” she gasped.

The pain was getting worse.

“Should I take you to the hospital?”

“No,” she told him, shaking her head. “It’s fine. It’ll go away.”

“I don’t know, Nicole. I think—“

“I’m fine, Red. Don’t make me scared.”

She was scared, but it wasn’t his fault. Nicole focused on relaxing, focused on her breath. Inhale and exhale and let go.

But then another painful cramp hit and she nearly doubled over.

“That’s it, we’re taking you to the hospital,” he growled, and the car suddenly speeded up and they were flying down the street.

Nicole didn’t care that he was speeding, because she was scared and feeling very strange indeed.

There was a wet sensation down
there
, and she looked down and saw a dark, red stain spreading across the lower front of her pants.

I’m bleeding, she thought. A feeling of unreality washed over her.

Why? Why is this happening again?

Luckily, they weren’t far from the hospital, and with Red’s driving and his car’s high-powered engine, they got there in record time.

Red parked right in front of the hospital by the Emergency Room entrance and helped Nicole out of the car. He started yelling to anyone who would listen that there was an emergency.

Soon, Nicole was surrounded by hospital staff asking questions, putting her in a wheelchair, and then there was more shouting and they were moving quickly down the hallway.

She was frightened, but she was also bleeding badly. The dark stain had spread quickly down her pant legs, and she was feeling rather faint.

Or maybe it was shock.

Red kept looking down at her, asking if she was okay. Telling her that he would take care of her, not to worry.

And then she was just hearing the high pitched buzzing sound in her ears again—

a nightmare that was recurring—and snatches of conversation as more people joined the gathering party.

“…bleeding heavily…third trimester…Dr. Rosen…husband says she’s had a previous miscarriage…complained of cramping…preeclampsia…recommended bed rest…possible placental abruption…emergency C-section…”

Everything was jumbled together and Red was holding her hand and she was just thinking, please, let my baby be okay. Please. Please. Please.

***

Kallie was online looking at one-way flights back to Ohio (and thinking that soon it would be time call her parents and tell them) when she received a text from Red Jameson.

He’d never—despite what Nicole might have wanted to believe—texted her or called her.

What he’d written made Kallie’s heart skip a beat.

Nicole in emergency surgery. C-section. Waiting for news. Will update as soon
as they tell me anything.

She actually felt sick to her stomach. How could Nicole be in emergency surgery so soon after leaving the The Hamptons to go back home to Connecticut? It had only been a few hours, and somehow in that short timespan something had gone terribly wrong.

Suddenly, Kallie had to face the truth. She’d been hurt that Nicole had accused her of such an awful thing as sleeping with Red, and that’s why she’d wanted to leave and go back to Ohio. Kallie realized she’d basically been throwing a temper tantrum to let Nicole know how much those comments had hurt.

But Nicole had taken Kallie in that horrible day when Brad had assaulted her, Nicole had responded to Kallie’s call for help, even though she had been a total stranger.

Nicole had treated Kallie like family. And Kallie truly felt as though they were sisters—and sisters should be able to get through something like this.

The bottom line was that Kallie was frightened. She couldn’t just sit there in the Hamptons and wait for text updates.

She googled a taxi service and then quickly made the call, explaining she needed to get a ride into Connecticut as soon as possible. Because of the length of the drive, they told her she’d have to pay a flat rate of three hundred dollars.

“That’s fine, just get here as soon as you can,” she told them.

She would have paid everything in her meager bank account to be there for Nicole when she needed her.

***

Darkness.

Swimming out of the darkness was like breaking the surface of a lake and finding that the sun was shining on your face. It was too bright.

It was too much.

Nicole closed her eyes and then opened them again, blinking. She didn’t really know where she was.

Am I in Connecticut? She thought. No, it didn’t feel right. She was somewhere else, but her brain couldn’t seem to put it together.

Her mouth felt like it had been stuffed with cotton balls. Her tongue was thick, and her head ached.

Then it all came back to her in a rush—the ride home, the sudden pains, and Red speeding all the way to hospital.

She was in a hospital bed, in a room and it was post surgery. Her baby was gone.

Where is she?
Nicole asked.

A nurse came over and looked down at her, asking her how she was feeling.

Why won’t anyone tell me if my daughter’s alive?
Why?

And then she realized that she hadn’t gotten the words out. It was a jumble, she was barely even conscious.

Her eyes fluttered closed, then open again. “Tell me where my baby is,” she rattled through numb lips.

The nurse smiled at her. “Your baby girl is healthy, Nicole. The surgery went very well, although you did lose a great deal of blood.”

“Where is she?”

“She needs special care right now, so she’s in the neonatal care unit—but she’s doing great.”

Nicole breathed a sigh of relief and closed her eyes again, drifting off.

***

“Nicole,” he said softly. “You awake?”

She was, as it turned out, although she’d been drifting again. Nicole opened her eyes and saw Red standing next to her hospital bed, his face radiant with joy. She’d never seen him this happy, she realized—and her heart leapt in her chest.

“How is she?” Nicole said, holding out her hand. Red took it and kissed her fingertips.

“She’s so beautiful,” he said, his eyes brimming with tears of pure joy. “I couldn’t believe it when I saw her. She looks like you—the spitting image.”

“I want to see her,” Nicole said. “When can I see her?”

“They’re actually bringing a wheelchair for you,” Red told her, squeezing her hand tight, “so that you can go see her right away.”

Nicole tried to sit up a little, but she grimaced. There was a great deal of pain in her abdominal area, for reasons she didn’t need explained to her. Still, she was shocked by the discomfort.

“I need to sit up.”

“Let me raise the bed,” he laughed, grabbing the controller and raising the top of the hospital bed slowly.

“That’s good, Nicole told him, sighing.

“Kallie’s here,” he told her.

“She’s here?” Nicole said.

“I ran into her in the waiting room when you were sleeping. Apparently, she took a cab to the hospital right away when I let her know what happened.”

“Really? That must have been expensive.”

“I’m sure it was.”

The door to the hospital room opened, and Nicole saw a nurse pushing an empty wheelchair. The nurse smiled and said, “Are you ready to see your daughter?”

“I’m already getting up,” Nicole replied.

Red jumped to help her out of the hospital bed. It hurt to stand up, but she didn’t care about the pain right now. All Nicole cared about was seeing her baby girl.

They got her situated in the chair, and then Red wheeled her out of the room and they went down the hall.

A minute later, they were approaching the NICU. Nicole’s heart was racing and she felt like she could barely contain herself—she wanted to jump out of the wheelchair and run to her baby.

“Where is she?” Nicole asked, as they wheeled her past the incubators.

“We’re almost there,” the nurse told her.

Bringing her to the back row, and stopping at one incubator in particular, the nurse pointed straight ahead.

“Oh my god,” Nicole said. “Can I hold her?”

“Just a moment.” The nurse reached into the incubator and began to take the baby out. Nicole was surprised at how much medical equipment centered around this one tiny little being—it was kind of frightening.

But she couldn’t be frightened for long, because a moment later her daughter was being placed in her arms. She looked down at her child, saw the girl’s little beautiful face, and tears flowed down Nicole’s cheeks.

She looked up at Red and he was laughing and tears were there for him as well.

“I can’t believe it,” Nicole said, looking back at her baby. “You’re here, beautiful girl. Look at how little and perfect you are.” She cooed at her.

Nicole rocked her gently, feeling her warmth, and Nicole felt her own heart open and melt and break into a thousand pieces.

She thought of Renee, the little baby who’d never had a chance to live. Maybe her spirit was with them now, happy and relieved and celebrating—it felt like she was.

“I think we should call her Riley,” Nicole told him.

“She looks like a Riley,” he agreed.

This was it, Nicole thought. She had everything she could ever want right here in this hospital room full of equipment and machines and tubes. She had Red and she had her little girl, safe and sound.

They were finally a family.

***

Kallie didn’t know if she was overstepping her boundaries by showing up at Nicole’s hospital room so soon after her surgery. After all, Kallie wasn’t family—she wasn’t even a longtime friend like Danielle. She was just a girl that Nicole had been nice enough to help out of a difficult spot.

But Red had texted her and told her to stop by the room, so that gave her a little more courage.

As she approached the door to the room, she could hear the two of them laughing and talking inside. They sounded so happy, so in love—she could feel it all the way out here, in the hallway.

It hurt a little, she realized. As happy as Kallie was that everything had worked out and the baby was safe and Nicole was healthy—Kallie couldn’t help but think about how alone she was, and how she didn’t have any of what they had.

Still, this wasn’t the time for selfish and self-pitying thoughts. It was time to think of her friend’s joy.

Kallie knocked. The door was ajar, but she didn’t want to presume.

“Come in,” Nicole called out.

When Kallie stepped into the room, she was struck by just how radiant the two of them were. Nicole’s face was glowing, and Red had a smile like she’d never seen on him before.

“Congratulations!” Kallie cried, and ran to Nicole’s hospital bed.

She hugged her, not too hard, and realized that right at this moment she was completely and utterly happy for Nicole.

Look at her, Kallie thought. She deserves this. She deserves every bit of it.

Nicole smiled and held Kallie’s hand for a moment. “I really want to thank you for coming out here to support us today. Red and I both appreciate it more than you know.”

“Thanks, but it was the least I could do after everything you’ve done for me.”

“You’ve more than repaid us for all of that,” Nicole said, waving her off. “And especially after the way I treated you earlier. The way I spoke to you was completely unacceptable and I’m ashamed of myself.”

“Nicole, you don’t have to say—“

“I do. I really do.” Nicole looked at Kallie, her eyes unwavering. “Do you forgive me?”

“Of course! Of course I forgive you. It’s water under the bridge for me, seriously.”

“Good.” Nicole patted her hand again, and seemed to lighten. “Now we can move on to other important matters.” She glanced at Red and he took over the conversation.