For Everything (21 page)

Will took her trembling hand in his squeezing her fingers. “Sara had no right to say those things to you. Clay is not nor would he ever be embarrassed by you.”

She shook her head staring out the window.

“Where are you going?” He stroked her fingers.

She shrugged. “You should go home,” she turned closer to the side of the train.

Will squeezed her fingers, “I can’t leave you alone, don’t ask me to.”

She tugged at her fingers but he wouldn’t let go. “Your wife will be missing you, you need to go home where you belong.”

He caught her chin, turning her to face him, “I will go home if you come with me.”

“I can’t,” she whispered, “just go.”

They pulled up to a train station. The train slowed to a stop and the doors slid open. Lily stood, yanking her fingers out of Wills, walking pass him. “I thank you for your kindness, but I am not your problem, I have already caused too many, please go home.” She walked off the train.

Will followed, watching her movements closely. She purchased two tickets. He walked up to the counter and purchased the same two tickets, tracking her through the crowd.

Lily sighed. She couldn’t see Will behind her any more, and headed onto the train to New Orleans.

She was sure he was stuck in the crowd of fans that recognized and gathered around him. He wouldn’t be able to follow her.

Will caught sight of Lily walking on the train to New Orleans. Quickly disengaging from the people gathered, he just made it on the train before it pulled out.

Once the train began moving, he joined Lily again.

She jerked, startled as Will sat next to her again. “Please, don’t follow me.”

“I can’t leave you alone,” he twisted in the seat facing her.

“Yes, you can. It is a simple thing.” She looked away, staring out the window. “The way it needs to be.”

“No, it doesn’t.” He leaned forward trying to see her better.

She rubbed her fingers over her eyes, “Yes, it does, too many people have been hurt because of me.”

He laid his hand on her shoulder. “No, Lily, not because of you, because of Jason.”

“There is no difference,” her voice cracked, “please go away.”

“No, I won’t leave. What Jason did is not your fault.” Will took her hand in his, squeezing softly. Her fingers didn’t return his squeeze just lay in his palm. “Clay is worried sick about you.”

“He needs to move on.” She shrugged,  leaning sideways against her seat. “Find someone else.”

He squeezed her fingers again. “He doesn’t want anyone, else.”

She rubbed her cheek against the seat. “He will.”

Will stared, startled. Did she believe… yes, she did, the truth written on her face, in her heartbreak, she really thought she would embarrass Clay. “Clay loves you.”

“He is mistaken,” she whispered.

He stared at her, his fingers tightening on hers, “Lily, you don’t believe that do you?”

She didn’t respond, only continued to stare out the window, at the scenery flowing by the train.

Will turned her face, “Clay loves you, plain as day. You can see it in his eyes, his demeanor. Don’t doubt his love. Don’t let what Sara said in moment of spite take that from you. She is jealous Clay loves you and Tom doesn’t love her.”

She offered Will a small smile. “Thank you, that is sweet, but you need to go.”

He brushed his fingers over her face. “I won’t, Lily, I can’t.”

She pulled away from Will bringing her knees up on the seat to her chest. She laid her chin against her knees staring out the window.

He sighed deeply, unsure of how to get through to her. He took out his phone sending a text to his brother and the other three.

“Found Lily on train to Orleans.”

He received four quick responses. To Scott and Kevin he replied he would stay with her until Clay arrived and they should head home, thanking them for their help. He said the same to Tom, but asked him to check on Skye and tell her he found Lily.

To Clay he sent another message.

“Lily won’t talk, wants me to leave. She seems so lost. Meet us in Orleans.”

Clay sent Will a quick text. “On my way, meet you at station. Don’t lose her.”

Will tried many times during the ride to draw Lily into conversation, but he couldn’t. He was frustrated. The longer the ride went the more withdrawn she became.

“Lily,” he said almost desperately, “Clay isn’t going to let you walk out of his life.”

She rolled her head on the back of the seat glancing at Will. The haunted look in her eyes shocked him. “He has no choice. I don’t want Clay in my life.”

He didn’t flinch, realizing she thought he would accept her words and leave “Don’t you?”

“No,” she whispered, “he can find so much more than me, someone who… who…”

“Who what?” Will asked.

“Can give him what he deserves.” She looked back out the window no longer seeing the scenery whipping by her.

“And what is that?” he questioned.

“Children,” she answered.

Clay had already told him, “Lily, as much as my brother loves kids and wants them someday, he is not willing to give you up to make that happen, there are other ways to achieve that.”

Her breath rushed over her lips. “You don’t understand. Clay deserves more than I can ever be.”

“Clay deserves the woman he loves.” He gripped her chin, forcing her to look at him.

She jerked her chin out of his hand. “Yes, but that isn’t me. Clay pities me, but he doesn’t love me.”

“Why, Lily?” Will demanded softly. “Why do you doubt him?”

“Be… be… because… I have to,” she confessed.

Will closed his eyes, understanding. He did. She was only trying to protect herself from further hurt, pain. Clay had been the only man to touch her heart, to show her how to love, to accept her scars and all. He made her believe in a future. If Lily found out differently, it would destroy her.

Will forced her legs down, turning her on the seat to face him. “Lily, I remember the day you agreed to go to Seattle. He was ecstatic.”

She turned her head away from him. Why couldn’t he leave her alone? Leave her to her misery?

“He manipulated Don and conned you into going. We argued over it.” He grabbed her hands, holding them tightly. “I thought he was being unfair. But I knew he was crazy about you, had been for awhile.”

Will smiled at the confusion on her face. “Clay talked about you, since the first time he met you at the café. I have had to listen. My wife too. She was so excited to meet you because she knew how crazy my brother was about you.”

She tilted her head, not wanting to listen, but unable to stop. Why was he doing this to her?

“Clay couldn’t understand why you avoided him, barely talking to him, even though he kept trying. He went down to hang out with Don just to see you. He wanted you from the first moment he saw you. He would come over and drink, asking me, wondering what was so wrong with him you wouldn’t even look at him.” Will brushed her face with his fingers. “Clay has been in love with you since the first moment he laid eyes on you over a year ago.”

”Don’t,” she pleaded, tears running down her face, “please, don’t do this.”

“There is nothing Clay wouldn’t do for you Lily,” he pressed on, seeing she wanted to believe him, but was afraid to. “He loves you. I realize this is hard for you, confusing. I understand you are afraid of Jason, and you have every right to be. Clay won’t let him hurt you ever again. Lily, give Clay a chance. Believe in him, trust him, let him love you, show you and I promise you everything will be fine.”

He sat quietly, watching her struggle to comprehend his words, the train beginning to slow.

“Come on,” Will pleaded, standing, “we are at the station. I am sure my brother is out on the platform waiting. Not knowing where you are, if you are okay frightens him.”

He held out his hand to her. “Please Lily, give Clay a chance.”

Chapter 31

Lily walked hand in hand with Will. She didn’t smile, she didn’t look around; she only existed, in the moment, of not knowing.

Clay saw Lily standing with his brother, her hand in his. He gulped, his eyes taking her in. Her dusky eyes were haunted, dark shadows lay under them, her lips pursed as if she was afraid to speak. He ran his hand over his face, walking toward them.

Will gave Clay slight smile; he didn’t need to explain.

“Lily,” his hands shook as he gently clasped her face. His eyes searched hers, seeing her confusion, her fear. He pulled her into his arms, relieved she was okay. “Come on, I have tickets back to LA. We will talk once we get to Wills.”

She didn’t say anything. The three of them walked out of the train station, onlookers following recognizing Will and Clay. Fans wanted to get pictures of them, were trying to get autographs.

She stopped suddenly. Her eyes glued to the crowd, the large crowd that formed to get a glimpse of Will and Clay.

“Lily,” Clay stopped with her, wondering.

She looked around, gulping, her eyes bulging, her skin crawling. Jason was there, somewhere in the crowd. She could feel him. Her body shook. She took two steps away from Clay and Will in a panic. She couldn’t find him, but she knew he was there.

Will saw the color drain for her face, “what is wrong?”

She took two more steps away, ready to run, to run for her life.

“Lily?” Clay grabbed her tightly. Her fear apparent, her body shaking, similar to her reaction the last time she saw Jason.

“Clay,” Will growled, his fists clenching, “to the left.”

He turned, looking into the crowd. “I don’t believe it.” He lifted Lily off her feet, turning. Clay and Will stalked out of the station ignoring everyone who gathered, not signing one autograph, not stopping for one picture. They went right to the waiting car.

****

Clay closed the door to his room in his brother’s house, his eyes never leaving Lily. She stood, staring into space.

He grabbed her hands. “When did you last sleep, Lily?”

She shivered at his touch, but didn’t answer him, she couldn’t. If she spoke, he might evaporate in front of her eyes like all her dreams.

“Have you eaten?” He knelt pulling off her shoes. He began undressing her. She offered him no help or resistance. “Lily, love, please talk to me.”

She stood in her bra and underwear, silent, unmoving.

He placed his lips against her stomach, flicking his tongue over the skin, her muscles clenched in reaction. He licked and kissed her stomach, watching her.

Her eyes responded to his touch. He placed his hands on her hips, held them tightly placing more kisses along her stomach, “Take your bra off.”

She was responding to his touch and if this was how he needed to break through to her than he would. He had to.

Her hands moved, unhooked, dropping her bra, her eyes never leaving his face.

He pulled her underwear down her legs and over her feet. His thumbs stroked her hipbones as he placed a wet kiss on her navel.

“Put your hands on the bed, lean back.” He watched her do as he said her body arching. “Spread your legs more.”

She did slowly.

“Leave them there.” His hands coursed down her hips. His eyes took her in, arched backwards, her hair brushing the bed, her legs spread, her pussy in front of his mouth.

He moved his hands over the outside of her thighs, back up the inside, moving to her pussy lips. He traced his finger over her slit.

He kissed her stomach, heard her breathing hitch. Gripping her ass, he held her motionless.

His tongue traveled down her stomach to her pussy then back up before moving to the sides. He licked, sucked her pussy lips.

He heard her soft moan and looked up her arched body, her breasts moving with her heavy breathing. “Don’t move. Stay as you are.”

His hands slipped over her thighs, opening her pussy lips to him. He placed a long wet kiss on her clit.

He flicked his tongue over her clit, teasing the sides of her pussy before pushing inside of her. She moaned again.

His fingers opened her pussy lips more, sucking her clit into his mouth. His tongue flicked repeatedly before sliding down to thrust inside.

She started to move her hips and he stopped. “Don’t move.”

She stopped moving, her legs, her body trembling as her heart raced. When Clay touched her, she felt so alive, so safe. Like nothing in the world could hurt her.

He licked, sucked, laved at her pussy until she moaned again. He slid two fingers inside of her and worked them in tandem with his mouth.

Her legs trembled.

He knew she was close, her hands fisted on the bed as she kept still for him.

He used his thumb to stimulate her anus, as his fingers thrust inside her, his tongue flicked her clit before sucking fiercely.

She cried out, her pussy clenching on his fingers, streaks of sensation quivering along her skin.