After hesitating a moment, Heck said, “What do you think? He was saying that he should be the go-to guy this season, that you can’t be trusted to make the big play. I told him I didn’t want to hear that stuff and that you’re a great receiver. I said that he had no business talking about you behind your back and that he’d better cut it out.”
Keith slumped in his chair, his appetite gone. “I don’t know. Maybe he’s right.”
Heck’s jaw dropped open.
“Huh?”
“Maybe I
would
hurt the team.”
Heck’s eyes blazed angrily. “Listen up! The only way you’ll hurt the Bucks is if you wimp out and quit! I don’t believe this! Here’s what you better do: You better show up and go all out and make Larry look like a total doofus for putting you down. You’re a better receiver than he is, and all you have to do is show it. Coach Bodie will see it, too.
“So … you coming to practice this afternoon, or not?” Heck demanded.
Keith sighed. Then he nodded. “I’ll be there.”
T
he next couple of days went smoothly for Keith, who thought he performed well, on both offense and defense, where he was clearly better than Larry because of his reflexes and coordination. Possibly because of that, or because Heck had warned him, Larry had called off his whispering campaign against Keith — at least for the time being. The coach was satisfied with the team’s progress, and Keith relaxed his suspicion.
With a little more than a week left before the first game of the season, Coach Bodie started running intrasquad scrimmages, in which one section of the team defended against the other group. Keith felt good about the fact that he was teamed up with Billy, Heck, and Cody on what looked like the first string … until the coach switched people around.
His high point came when Billy tried an end around. He faked a handoff to Heck and pitched the ball to Keith, who was circling around from right end to the left side. Cody pulled out of the line to make a downfield block and Keith sped down the sideline for a big gain, faking Larry out of his socks in the process. Sometimes, life was good.
A few plays later, Billy called the same halfback option play that had been Keith’s downfall the previous year. Keith had to go downfield while Billy lateraled to Heck, who would throw a long pass to Keith, now presumably in the clear.
Sure enough, Keith got past Larry and looked back for the pass. But he was shocked to see Heck pump the ball once, tuck it under his arm, and run! He got three yards before three defenders, including Larry, brought him down. Keith ran up to Heck as he got to his feet.
“I was wide open!” he yelled. “Why didn’t you pass?”
Heck stared at Keith, startled. “There were guys in front of me and I couldn’t see you. Also, I figured I had more running room than I really did. What’s the big deal?”
Keith glared at his friend. “You didn’t want to throw me the ball! Admit it!”
“Are you serious?” demanded Heck, getting angry himself. “You ought to know better than that!”
Larry, who had been eagerly following the argument, muttered, “If he
didn’t
want to throw the guy the ball, can you blame him?” He spoke loud enough for Keith to hear, but not the coach, who was some distance away.
“Shut your mouth!” Keith yelled. This time, Coach Bodie
did
hear, and blew his whistle. “Keith, get over here!”
Steaming, Keith trotted over to the coach and started to explain what had happened. But the man shook his head.
“I don’t want to hear it, son. The thing is, the time has come for you to think about playing ball and stop looking for things to get mad about.”
“But —”
Coach Bodie held up a hand. “No ‘buts.’ I’ll talk to Larry and Heck separately, don’t you worry. However, what bothers me most here is that you still seem to have a real problem with hurt feelings. It could split the team into opposing sides. I won’t let that happen. You’re a talented player, and you can make a major contribution to the Bucks, I know that. But the quarreling and the bad feeling can’t go on.
“I think you can get past this and get back to what matters out here. At least, I
hope
you can. But for now, I want you to take the rest of the afternoon off and think real hard about whether or not you want to get yourself focused on the team, rather than yourself.
“If you decide you can do it, then we’ll see you tomorrow.”
K
eith walked home, getting angrier with every step. Everyone was being unfair, everyone was treating him like he was to blame. Not just Larry, either: the coach, his teammates, even his so-called friend, Heck, had turned against him. And he was also angry with himself. It seemed like he simply couldn’t control these outbursts that made him look like an idiot. Why couldn’t he just do what his father said, play the game and ignore all the bad stuff?
But he couldn’t. If he had only —
“Keith! Hey,
Keith!
Wait up!!”
Turning to see who was calling him, Keith saw Heck running after him and catching up. He turned away and started walking again, faster.
“Keith! Stop!”
When Keith wouldn’t stop walking, Heck went around him and stood there, blocking his path.
“Leave me alone,” Keith snapped.
“I don’t believe this! You really think I turned against you? I’ve been your best friend for years, and now you think I’m not your friend anymore?”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Keith said, feeling torn and foolish.
“Well, I want an answer!” Heck’s face was red and his fists were clenched. “We’ve been buddies all this time, but now you think I’m not your friend anymore. Is that right or wrong?”
Keith realized he was going to have to say something. “I think you decided that Larry was right, that I’m just a choke artist. Okay? You wanted an answer, now you have it.”
Heck blinked, opened his mouth, then closed it again. When he spoke, his voice was quiet.
“Okay. If that’s how you feel, then fine. I’ve been on your side all this time. So was everyone else, except Larry. But you know what? If that’s how you feel, then I guess I was wrong about you. You’re a quitter. You’d rather run away from a problem than do something about it. You want to quit? Okay, then, quit. I’m tired of this. See you around.”
He walked past Keith and headed away, not looking back. Keith watched him go, feeling miserable. He’d really blown it now.
That evening, before dinner, Keith went to his father, who was watching TV in the den.
“I’ve had it with football. I quit. Now everyone hates me, even Heck. I don’t think they’d want me back even if I wanted to come. And even Larry’s father was working against me, trying to get the coach to play Larry in front of me. It’s not fair, and I’m sick of it!”
Mr. Stedman put down his book. “Joe Vincent? You think he’s involved? I know Joe, and I have a hard time seeing him doing such a thing. I think you should calm down and give it a rest, and then we can talk —”
“No more talk! I don’t want to talk about it. I better go do my homework.” Keith headed to his room, where he sulked until it was time to eat.
Traci was too young to understand that Keith’s silence at the table meant that he was in a bad mood. She asked, “How is football going?”
Keith dropped his fork and snarled, “Will everybody stop talking to me about
football?
I don’t want to say anything about football! Okay?”
Stunned, not knowing what she’d done, Traci began to cry. As soon as he saw tears running down his sister’s face, Keith felt like a total jerk. “Trace? Hey, listen, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to yell at you, it’s not your fault. I’m just a creep. Okay? Please don’t cry.”
Traci dried her eyes, and dinner resumed, but nobody looked happy. A few minutes later, Mr. Stedman said, “Keith, after dinner you and I are going to talk. That’s an order.”
Keith nodded and realized that he’d gone too far. His father was usually an easygoing guy, but now Keith knew that his dad was annoyed.
Once the table was clear, Keith and his father went into the den. “Sit,” said Mr. Stedman, pointing to a chair. “I spoke to Joe Vincent after our earlier conversation.”
“You
did?
I didn’t want —”
“I did what I thought had to be done. I told Joe that there seemed to be a problem between you and Larry, and asked what he knew about it. And guess what? Larry’s dad was
not
trying to persuade the coach that Larry is a better player. He’s worried about Larry’s attitude. Larry asked his father to persuade the coach to make him the starter, but Joe told Larry he wouldn’t and that he didn’t think Larry was going about this the right way. Understand? Joe wasn’t talking about
you
. He was talking about his own son, and asking Coach Bodie what he should do.”
Keith was surprised. “He … he
was?
But I thought …”
“I know what you thought, Keith. But it turns out you were wrong. Is it possible you were wrong about anything else?”
“Anything else? Like what?” Keith suspected he already knew what.
“Oh … maybe whether Heck is still your friend, despite your suspicions, or whether Coach Bodie and the team still want you, despite your suspicions … stuff like that. And, of course, about how you treat your sister.”
“I
said
I was sorry,” Keith mumbled, feeling ashamed of himself.
“I’d go tell her again and make sure she’s all right. The other thing I wish you’d do is try to figure out why what happened to you almost a year ago is still so important to you. Why is it making you suspect your friends, yell at your sister? Why is it keeping you from enjoying a game you used to love?”
Keith looked at his feet. “I don’t know.”
Mr. Stedman said, “I’ll bet you might work it out; if you really think it over.”
“Well … I’ll try. Now I better see Traci.”
Keith’s father smiled. “Good idea.”
Keith found Traci in her room. She looked at him as though she wasn’t sure how he was going to behave. “Trace, I’m real sorry about what happened at dinner. I was wrong to yell at you, and I’ll try to never do it again.”
Traci gave him a bright smile. “Okay.” The smile changed to a look of concern. “How come you’re feeling so bad?”
Surprised, Keith asked, “How do you know how I’m feeling?”
“’Cause I heard you yell last night, like you were having a real bad dream. The kind of bad dream I used to get.”
“You ‘used to get’? You mean you don’t get bad dreams anymore?” Keith found himself interested.
“Oh, sure I get them,” his sister replied. “But they’re not so bad, and they go away.” She shrugged. “Mommy says the worst dreams are all just pretend. So when I have a really bad dream I tell myself it’s all just pretend and I don’t have that dream anymore.”
“Huh,” Keith said. “That’s Mom’s advice? And it works?”
Traci flopped back on her bed and nodded. “Yep. She says things you dream are much scarier than what really happens.”
Keith stood up and smiled. “You know what? Maybe I’ve been scaring myself too much lately. Maybe I ought to stop doing that.”
Traci looked at him very seriously. “It’s bad to scare yourself. Unless you’re just doing it for fun, like Halloween stuff.”
Keith leaned over and ruffled Traci’s hair. “I’m glad I talked to you. I think I can stop myself from having those bad dreams, if I work at it.”
Traci grinned. “Good. Then you won’t be such a grouch.”
“Right,” answered Keith. “Thanks for the tip, Trace. You really helped me.”
He left his sister’s room, wondering if it could be as simple as that.
K
eith got to school early the next morning, hoping to have a chance to talk with Heck and straighten things out. Five minutes before he had to be in his first class, he spotted his friend in the hall and dodged between groups of students until he caught up to him.
Heck’s expression was cold at first: “What do you want?”
“To say I’m sorry. I know it seems like I’m saying this a lot these days, but.… Well, I’ve been totally out of control and saying and doing really dumb things. And I’ll understand if you don’t want to have anything to do with me now, but I think I may be okay again, and I want to go to practice and get back to normal.”
Heck was startled and a little suspicious. “Huh. What happened? How come you’re normal all of a sudden?”
Keith smiled. “Someone straightened me out.”
“Yeah?” Heck was interested in spite of himself. “Who? Your dad?”
“Nope. Traci.”
Heck gaped, amazed. “Your
kid sister
straightened you out? Get out of here!”
Keith laughed. “No, really. She told me — uh-oh, we better get to class. I’ll explain later. But are we all right now? I really am sorry about going off like I did.”
Heck shrugged and stuck out his hand. “I guess so. I mean, we have to be friends, because otherwise I’ll never hear how little Traci straightened you out.”
The two boys parted, friends again.
That afternoon, Keith and Heck arrived at practice together. “I better see Coach Bodie,” said Keith.
“Should I come with you?” Heck asked.
“No, I’d better talk to him myself.” Keith licked his lips, feeling nervous. “Then, I’m going to talk to Larry.”
Heck looked doubtful. “You sure that’s a good idea?”
“No,” Keith admitted. “But I have to try. Maybe we can work it out that way.”
“Good luck,” Heck said as Keith walked away to see the coach. Coach Bodie and Mack, his assistant, were talking when Keith approached. Keith waited until the coach turned toward him.
“Yes, Keith? What’s up?”
Keith cleared his throat, which suddenly felt dry. “Um, about yesterday. I know I was out of line and I shouldn’t have blown up like I did. I won’t let it happen again.”
“Good. I would hate to lose you,” the coach said. “We’ll be starting in a few minutes, if you want to warm up a little.”
Keith nodded and looked around, hoping that Larry was available, even though he wasn’t looking forward to the conversation.
He saw Larry tying a shoe and walked over. When the other boy saw Keith coming, he stood up and stared at him with suspicion clear in his face. “What do
you
want?” he asked.