Following Me (29 page)

Hadley would be okay, alive.  She
would wake up soon and start to recover.  She would learn from her mistakes,
and then they could all move on.

But today, she wasn’t okay, and
today, it wasn’t alright.  Today, it was painful and terrible and
heartbreaking.  Today, Devon would let herself feel it because it would make
her better tomorrow.

“I’m going to…go get something to
eat,” Devon said, not meeting the guys’ eyes as she walked past them.

“Do you want me to come with?”
Brennan asked, brushing her arm with his fingers.

She smiled at him and shook her
head.  She wanted to be alone.

Devon made it out the door and a
few feet down the hallway when she heard footsteps behind her.  She turned, her
heart rate picking up drastically.  After all her nightmares about being
followed, she couldn’t shake that uncontrollable fear.

“Devon, can we talk for a
minute?” Garrett asked, walking toward her.

“I’d rather not,” she said.  Her
chest was aching, and she just wanted to find a place to be alone. 
Couldn’t
he see that?

“I just wanted to apologize for
last night.”  He shifted awkwardly from foot to foot.

“I really don’t want to deal with
this right now, Garrett,” she said.

“I know.  I was an ass.  Devon,
please…I don’t know what I was thinking. I was really upset about Hadley,” he
said, stepping in closer and reaching out for her arm.

“Please don’t touch me,” she
said, pulling back quickly.

“Sorry.”  He dropped his arm.

“Can we just not do this right
now?  Hadley is in there, unconscious.  That is what’s important.  Let’s
just…deal with that first.  I don’t even want to think about last night or what
happened.”

“Devon—”

She held up her hand. 
“Please…just…no.  I can’t talk about it yet.  I need some time.”

Garrett nodded and took a step
back.  “Alright.  I can give you time,” he said with a sigh.

Devon turned on her heel and
walked away from Garrett, leaving him standing alone in the hallway.

Despite all the terrible things
that had happened this week, she felt strong, stronger than she had in a long
time.

HADLEY WAS RELEASED from the
hospital three days later.  She was required to see a psychiatrist who would
monitor her progress.  Her doctors had decided it wasn’t attempted suicide, so
they were lenient with her discharge.  If it were up to Devon, she would have
pushed Hadley straight into rehabilitation, but Hadley could talk her way in or
out of anything.  Once Hadley had regained consciousness, the last thing she
wanted was to be in the hospital for any longer than necessary.

Devon had camped out on Brennan’s
couch until Hadley returned to Garrett’s apartment.  She hadn’t felt right
about going back with just Garrett there.  His hospitality had run its course. 
Still, she couldn’t be away from Hadley when she came back, and Devon didn’t
want her to know what Garrett had done.  Hadley had too much stress as it was,
and adding Garrett’s stupid mistake on top of that would be catastrophic.

Hadley had received a temporary
medical leave from work so she could recover.  She slept a lot, which Devon
thought was good.  It was better than feeling the withdrawal pains she was
experiencing.  Devon didn’t even bother to ask how much Hadley had been using
because it was pretty obvious that the answer was going to be way too much. 
Whatever the drug use had started out as, it was far from casual now.

While it was a relief to have
Hadley alive and back in the house again, it didn’t make the living situation
any better.  When Devon and Garrett weren’t taking care of Hadley, they tiptoed
around each other.  Devon probably should have been gentler with him at the
hospital.  They had both been grieving, and she had snapped, but her pride held
her tongue.  She couldn’t admit that to him, but either way, he never should
have touched her.

“Hey,” Devon said, walking into
the living room.

Hadley had taken up residence on
the couch ever since she had returned.  She was back to watching
Millionaire
Matchmaker
and bad Lifetime movies.  At least, some things had remained constant.

“Hey,” Hadley said with a smile
when Devon walked into the room.

In the few days that Hadley had
been home, color had come back to her cheeks.  The week off was already doing
her some good, but Devon knew the battle was far from over.

“How are you feeling?”

“Not so bad today,” Hadley said,
staring down at her nail beds.  “It’s getting easier at least.”

“That’s really good to hear.” 
Devon leaned against the wall.  She was so thankful that Hadley was alive.  Not
everyone was so fortunate.

“What about you?  How are you
doing?”

Devon shrugged.  “I’m alright. 
No work today.”

“Off on a Saturday?  That’s a
shocker.  And here I was under the delusion that Jenn was a slave driver,”
Hadley said with a laugh.

It was nice to hear her laugh
again.  Hadley was turning back into her friend.

“Don’t let her think otherwise!”
Devon said, cracking a smile.

“Hey, Dev.  Will you come here
for a minute?”  Hadley sat up in her seat.

“Sure,” Devon said, taking a seat
at the end of the couch.

“I kind of wanted to…talk to you.”

“What about?” Devon asked, her
heart rate picking up before she even knew what Hadley would ask.

“Well, first, I wanted to say
thank you,” Hadley whispered, staring down at her hands.  “You’ve been really
helpful here, taking care of me.  Garrett told me that you came to see me in
the hospital.  I wish I had been awake to see you.  But also,” she said,
looking up at Devon, “ thank you for trying to get through to me even when I
wasn’t listening.”

“Hadley,” Devon said, waving the
thanks away, “you don’t have to thank me.  I’m your friend.”

“I know, I know, but I really
wanted to.  I want you to know…you’re my best friend, and I shouldn’t have done
what I did,” Hadley said.

Devon nodded, reluctantly
accepting the thanks.  She felt bad taking them, especially after she had taken
advantage of their friendship, after Garrett had kissed her, after she had held
back all her own secrets. 
But what else could she do?
  Hadley wanted
her to accept the gratitude, and she couldn’t deny Hadley anything.

Hadley cleared her throat. 
“Well, I’m glad that’s out of the way.  Now, tell me how things are with you. 
I feel like I haven’t talked to you in forever.”

“Oh, things are fine, Hadley,”
Devon said awkwardly.  She didn’t want Hadley to know about Garrett or Reid. 
She wanted anonymity.  Most of all, she wanted to move on, and right now,
moving on looked like Brennan’s handsome face.

“Fine,” Hadley said, weighing the
word.

“Yeah.  Really, I’m fine.”

“Look, I don’t want this to come
off the wrong way because I know I just majorly fucked up.  But what’s wrong
with you?  Not knowing makes me feel even worse because you’re my friend, and I
can tell that you’re sad.  I just don’t know how to help because I don’t know
what’s wrong,” Hadley said, staring directly at Devon.

“I just, uh…” Devon began.  She
didn’t know what to say, but she knew that she had to tell Hadley something. 
“Reid and I are kind of on rocky footing.”

“I knew it!” Hadley shot up,
immediately regretted it, and slumped back into the couch.

“I think we broke up,” Devon
said, finding the reality of that to be truer the more times she said it.

“Holy shit!” Hadley cried. 
Forgetting how hurt she was, she quickly moved to sit next to Devon.  “I can’t
believe you guys broke up!”

“I know,” Devon said truthfully.

“I thought you guys were perfect
together.  What the hell happened?” Hadley asked in shock.

“I don’t know.  I came here, I
guess.”

“Wow.  I never thought long
distance would be your undoing,” Hadley said, shaking her head.

“Well, I didn’t exactly tell him
where I was going,” Devon finally admitted, feeling the weight lift.

“What?” Hadley asked, her
eyebrows coming together.  “So, he never knew you were here?  Did you guys
break up before you left?”

“Yeah.  Well, sort of.  I don’t
know.  Either way, it’s over now,” Devon said with a note of finality.

“Holy shit!  Seriously, holy
shit, Dev!  You and Reid are no more.”  Hadley put her hands on her head and
shook it back and forth.  “I’m totally shocked.  Sorry.  Give me a minute.”

Devon laughed.  “Take as long as
you like.”

“Well, no wonder you’ve been
sad!  God, I should have just asked earlier,” Hadley said with a giggle.

“To be honest, Hadley, I’m not
sure I would have told you.  I’ve been kind of moping around—”

“Ya think?” she asked, nudging
Devon’s shoulder.

Devon laughed and nudged her
back.  “But I’m glad you know now.”

“Me, too,” Hadley said with a
smile.

She looked healthier in that
moment than Devon had seen since she had arrived.  She was happy to have Hadley
back to her old self again.  Devon just hoped it was sustainable.

“Well, I have to get out of
here.  Sorry to leave you all alone,” Devon said, standing.

“Where are you going?  I thought
we could have some girl time,” Hadley said, sticking out her bottom lip.

“I’d love that, but I’m going
somewhere with Brennan,” she said, not able to hold back her blush.

Hadley arched an eyebrow.  “With
Brennan, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“Where are you guys going?”

Devon shrugged.  “He won’t tell
me.  He said he wanted it to be a surprise.”

“A surprise?”  Hadley didn’t even
bother to hold in her smile.  “Uh-huh.”

“Stop doing that!” Devon said,
laughing.

“Doing what?” Hadley asked
innocently.

“Oh, you know what!”

“I mean, Brennan’s good-looking,
Devon.  I don’t blame you.”

“Hadley!  Jeez, we’re just
hanging out,” Devon said.

They had been hanging out all
week—with their lips locked, playful touches at work, eyes staring across the
room, and their hands exploring one another.  Devon’s cheeks heated as she
thought about it.

“Hanging out,” Hadley said with
air quotes.  “I sure hope that involves a bedroom.”

“Oh my god, seriously, you are
ridiculous,” Devon said, shaking her head.

“Just look at you!  You’re
blushing from head to toe.  Who knew I was actually the matchmaker?” Hadley
said exaggeratedly.

“Go back to watching your silly
show!  I have to get out of here,” Devon said.

“Wait, wait!” Hadley cried as
Devon tried to ease out of the living room.  “Have you made it to the bedroom?”

“Hadley!”

“Alright, alright.  Go have fun! 
I would have already told you though!” she called as Devon rushed out of the
apartment.

Devon could hear Hadley’s
laughter, sweet and melodic, as she pulled the door closed.  At least, Hadley
was laughing again.