Follow (Social Media #1) (8 page)

I laugh again, this time a little heartier, and then I shoot her the smile. My movie-star smile. “What if I’m both?”

“I’m not going to lie, Asher. I find the submission stuff sexy. I’m not sure I’m a submissive at heart, but I can get on board with some of what you’re looking for. But the minute I feel manipulated, I’m out.”

“Then you better leave right now, Grace. Because all of this, every bit of it, is manipulation. My goal, as your master, is to push your limits and make you enjoy things you never thought you would. I do that by manipulating you sexually. With teasing, with erotic spankings, with psychological conditioning that will allow you to let go of the monster mentality and accept the fact that, believe it or not, this shit is just fucking fun.”

She huffs out a laugh and then the smile follows. “Just fucking fun?”

“Yeah.” I smile back at her. “I mean, look at it rationally. If we weren’t getting off on it, we’d get bored and stop. If it was really hurting us, we’d manifest that in our professional lives. I’ve had a lot of submissives over the years, Grace. None of them ever claimed I’d hurt them mentally or physically. An NDA does not excuse me from being punished for criminal activities. If I rape you, that piece of paper will not prevent you from seeking justice. If I break your arm, that piece of paper will not keep me out of jail. It becomes meaningless if I abuse its power. And besides, I’m not interested in hurting you. I just want to excite you erotically.”

She’s on board, I know she is. But she’s still struggling to allow herself to say the words.

“Grace, you’re not a victim if you agree. You’re not a victim if you enjoy my domination. I’m not interested in forcing you to bend to my will. You’ve missed the whole point of submission if that’s what you believe. Everything I do, if you agree to this relationship, is geared towards gaining your trust and allowing me to arouse you sexually in ways that I prefer. That’s it. If I pull your hair, I’m trying to get you off. If I stroke your neck and then palm it with a little bit of pressure, I’m trying to make you come. If I stuff my cock down your throat and force you to salivate and breathe through it, you should let me do that because I like it. And because you like it as well.”

My fingers play with her clit again as my other hand comes back to rest on her throat, reminding her that the whole purpose of this is pleasure. I want to fuck her right now, but I can’t. Not until we get the ground rules figured out. She’s not signing anything tonight, so this verbal sparring is all we have to set it straight until she’s ready to commit. I take her hand and place it over the hard pulsating bulge in my pants. “You should want to submit to me because it makes me hard. It makes me want to fuck you in every way possible. It makes me addicted to you, Grace. Submitting to my whims so that I am pleased is addictive. I want that more than anything. I want a woman who will give me that when I ask for it.”

“Then why all the secrecy? Why the NDA? I mean, if you’re so convinced that this is good for me, and you’ve checked me out, then why do you have to gag me with the threat of legal action?”

“Please, Grace. I’m a Hollywood movie star. My father is a Hollywood legend. My family’s production company has hands in more than two dozen high-profile projects at this very moment. What I like in private is no one’s business but mine.”

“You’re wrong,” she says, interrupting me. That ticks me off a little, but since she’s not mine yet, I let it pass. “It’s not just your business, it’s my business too. Which means it’s unfair that I can’t articulate my experiences with a confidante just because your career might be impacted. You seem to think that there’s only one person in this contract, and that’s you. And honestly, that’s a big red flag for me. Because if my feelings and experiences are that inconsequential to you that the contract is written to exploit me and favor you, then you are preying on me. Pure and simple.”

“So leave,” I say impulsively. “Leave. And forget everything I said to you tonight. Just move on with your life and I’ll move on with mine.”

She swallows under my palm again and it takes all my self-control not to flip her over and fuck her blind. Her hand comes up to her neck once again, and once again she pries my fingers from her throat. And then she smiles a big fake smile and tips her head up. “It was great to spend time with you, Mr. Asher. Perhaps we’ll meet again some other day.”

And then she picks up her shoes, discarded when, I have no idea, and walks back down the pea gravel path to the beach.

“You’ll get lost,” I call out to her. “If you take the beach. You’ll get lost because you won’t know which path to take back to the bungalows.”

She turns around, walking backwards as she speaks. “I’m a big girl, Vaughn. A grown woman, in fact. I think I’ll manage.” And then she turns her back and skips down the few concrete stairs that stop at the sand.

“What will it take then?” I call again. “Grace! What will it take?”

She stops and turns. “Why? Why do you give a shit about me? Just stop and leave me alone. I’m not interested in feeding some sick pathology—”

“I’m not sick. It’s not sick to have a full, enriching sexual fantasy. I—”

“See,” she says cutting me off. “You’re so fucking self-absorbed, you assume I’m talking about you. But I’m not, OK? Did it ever occur to you that I have my own reasons for saying no? Reasons that have nothing to do with you.”

What
?

“And you’re so fucking clueless. Trust? You’re telling me to trust you when you’ve never earned it. Why the fuck should I trust you? Who the hell are
you
? I mean, yeah, I admit I’ve stalked you relentlessly online. I’ve tweeted shit about you that would make porn stars blush. And it would be very easy to just let you fuck me sideways, as you put it, and then walk away with the movie-star feather in my cap. But Jesus Christ, Asher. You’re an Oscar-winning
prick
.”

I laugh. I can’t help it.

“I’m glad you think that’s funny.” And then she turns and starts her trek down the beach, muttering out, “Asshole.”

I run to catch up to her and then I grab her arm. She pulls away, dropping her shoes and lifting her hands up in some kind of fake karate stance. “Don’t,” she orders. “Back off. I’m a certified Tae Bo specialist at the Women’s Health Spa in LoDo. And I’m warning you, I will not be held responsible—”

“Tae Bo? What the fuck—”

“Yah!” She smacks me in the neck with the side of her hand and I grasp my throat, gasping for air. “Tae Bo!” she screams as I fall to my knees and choke. “Oh, shit, Asher! I’m sorry! I’ve never done that to a real person before! Are you OK?”

I lower my head and try not to laugh, because holy shit, she totally got me.

“Asher? Asher? Oh my God, talk to me!” She kneels down in front of me and starts shaking my shoulders. “Asher!”

I take a long breath of air, let my heart rate settle, and then I look up and grab her lethal little wrists, forcing her down to the sand, and pinning them above her head as I move my body over the top of hers. “You wanna play hardball, Hit-Girl?”

She giggles up at me and my dick is hard again. Fuck. She’s all over the place tonight.

“I’m the master, Asher. I’m the master of playing games. So if you want to play with me, you should keep that in mind.”

“You”—I lean down into her face and stare her in the eyes—“are
not
the master. I’m the fucking master. You got that? And if you call me Asher one more time, I’ll make you pay for it later.”

“Oh, yeah? How?” She bites her lip as she waits for my answer and I realize what she’s doing. Evening out the playing field. Asserting control over her decision. Making me realize that if she gives in, it’s because she wants to give in and not because she’s forced.

I can’t ask for anything more, so I silently accept her terms and move the game forward. “I’ll spank you. Hard. Hard enough to make you cry and erotic enough to make you come.”

“And what if I’m bad on purpose? What if my tears are fake?”

“I’ll know.”

“How?”

“Because I promise to never push you that far until I do know. Because by the time we get to punishments, you will trust me implicitly and I will know if your tears are fake and push you harder if they are.”

“That sounds like it could take some time. So why should I care about your meaningless threats to spank me tonight?”

I smile at her and stretch my body out over the top of hers, leaning into her, pushing down on her. Hard enough that she gasps for air and my cock presses against her belly. “It will take time. But I have a long memory. I’m counting up all your indiscretions so I can dole out the consequences when you’re ready.”

She takes a deep breath.

“I promise, Grace. I respect you. You’re not my victim. I like you and I think you’re gorgeous. I love that you just cracked me in the neck and sent me to my knees. It makes me feel good that you can do that, although I’m not into physical fights, so if that shit turns you on—”

“No! No, no, no. It doesn’t.”

I smile big because while this night has had its share of ups and downs, it’s all coming out in my favor now. “OK, then. Are you ready?”

She gulps some air, like she’s not sure if she’s ready to agree to my offer, but at the same time, she’s not ready to walk away either. “I’m ready.”

“Then let the game begin.”

Chapter Eleven

#JustFuckingSpankMeAlready

G
AME.

He’s playing a game with me.

OK, asshole, I can play. I stare up at him and smile. “One, two, three, go.”

He sits up, straddling my hips, and then leans down into my neck. “You smell good. Like the sea.”

“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do with that.”

“Say
Thank you, Master.
That’s what you do with that.”

Oh, Jesus. This man is something else. But ten seconds ago I agreed to this, so it would be a monumental failure on my part if I didn’t at least try. “Thank you, Master,” I say back.

He smiles and stands up, then reaches down to offer a hand. I grab it and he lifts me to my feet. “You’re welcome.”

I’m at a loss now. He just stands there staring at me and I have no idea what to do. “Now what? I’m not sure what you want.”

“Why not ask me, then?”

“OK.” I look up into his eyes, unsure if that’s allowed. Unsure of anything, really. But he’s sexy. Beyond the fact that he’s Vaughn Asher, the guy I’ve masturbated to for the better part of three years, he’s sexy in another way too. His smile looks genuine right now. Like I’m amusing him. And I don’t feel it to be condescending. It seems genuine. Like I give him pleasure.

I
do
want to please him, I realize. I’d like to please him. I’d like to keep him smiling. I’m probably more submissive than I’d care to admit and that scares me. Control is something I crave. It keeps my life orderly and neat. It helps me deal.

But ever since he peeked over my shoulder in the bar, I’ve lost sight of who I am. Snapping at him, chopping him in the throat. Who does that? Not me. That’s so not like me.

Even though many seconds have passed since I agreed to ask him and no words have come forth, he’s patient. He waits for me to be ready. He’s still smiling, and that comforts me and gives me courage. “Master,” I say softly as I continue our game. “What do you want me to do?”

He breathes out, like he was holding it in as he waited, and then he cups my face and places his lips against mine in a gentle kiss. “That, Grace. I want you to do that.”

“I don’t understand,” I whisper back. The tide is coming in and the waves are bigger now, eclipsing my words so they are barely audible. “I don’t understand what that means.”

“I only respond to questions, Grace. Ask me a question and I will answer it.”

Why?
I want to say it out loud.
Why do I have to ask you the questions? Why can’t you just tell me?
But I know why, so I don’t bother. He wants me to defer to him. To submit. Asking him for things gives him pleasure. It probably excites him erotically. “Can you explain what you mean by
that
?”

He caresses my cheek with the back of his knuckles and then places a fingertip over my lips. “Suck on my finger, Grace. Gently, just very gently. Keep doing it as I talk.” I bite my lip, take a deep breath and then open my mouth so he can slip his finger inside. He places it on my tongue and I suck gently as he moves it back and forth. In and out. “I want you to think about everything I ask you to do. Just like you did a moment ago when you took your time deciding if you would ask me what I wanted. I don’t want you to say yes because I tell you to, Grace. I want you to say yes because you want to. Do you understand?”