Fixer-Upper (Spinning Hills Romance 3) (14 page)

Johnny nodded. “Was I the charming boy you were talking about?”

“Yes,” she managed.

He held her face to look into her eyes, while wiping a few of her tears away with his thumbs. “Have you forgiven him?” His voice was so low, so tender. Her heart slowed and breathing became difficult.
Don’t think, don’t feel. Don’t think, don’t feel.

“I’ve forgiven the boy . . . and I think I can learn to trust the man.” Why was she feeling so much?
Don’t think, don’t feel. Breathe in, breathe out.
“But you and I, we’re so bad for each other . . .” she said, her eyes flickering away.

 

Johnny’s heart dropped. “What do you mean?” he asked, his voice steady, his eyes not leaving her face.

Her throat worked. “We’re adults now, but look at us. You stayed late yesterday, painting your office, I was here all day Sunday, and now we want to paint the entire school and clean up the school yard. I encouraged you to take on five puppies, which made you have to buy the most run-down house in town, and we have no idea how big those dogs are going to get. Johnny, the whole thing could prove to be a nightmare.” She sighed and met his gaze again with a beseeching look. “Don’t you see? We encourage each other to take on too much, to get too involved—to lose ourselves. And that’s never good for anyone in the end. I’m glad we’re friends again, Johnny, and—and I trust you with the kids, but I don’t trust
us
. We shouldn’t make any decisions together, that’s for sure. We should always get outside opinions and input.”

Johnny searched her face. “What are you so afraid of, Marissa?”

“I just told you.”

“No. You didn’t. Do you even know?” he asked, but because it suddenly hurt to look at her, he let her go and slowly made his way to the door. He hesitated a moment before looking back to say, “I looked at the puppies’ paws and how loose their skin was before I said yes. That’s usually a pretty good indicator of how big they’re going to get, and the vet confirmed my guess. They’ll only grow to be about fifteen to twenty pounds. And the house is going to be one of the best decisions I’ve ever made, Marissa. I got it for a steal and it’s going to allow me to live mortgage-free.”

“Oh. I didn’t mean—”

“Yes, you did. But it’s okay.” He paused, feeling angry at himself, but not quite sure why. When she didn’t say anything, he sighed, wondering why he now felt so alone when only a moment before, he’d felt such a deep connection. He shook his head and left.

 

Amy came in to find Marissa staring off into space. “Are you okay?” she asked.

Marissa blinked and nodded.

“Are you two good?” she asked, a look of doubt crossing her face.

“I wish I knew. I never seem to know what we are.”

 

Johnny bought his very first property that afternoon. He then went straight from the county treasurer’s office to the Cursed Lover, feeling confident.

It was as if he and the house had formed a bond. It looked the way Johnny felt at that moment. Crumbling under crushing weight, but full of promise for anyone willing to take a chance on it. The house’s crushing weight was its second floor. Johnny’s crushing weight was the way he felt about Marissa. He couldn’t seem to tamp down the idea that somewhere inside, she was battling feelings for him, too. But maybe he was wrong about that. Maybe it was wishful thinking.

Could he be wrong about Brian not being right for her, too? People changed, and the little things he had against Brian might seem meaningless to some, but to Johnny they added up to a person who could hurt someone like Marissa. He felt it so deeply, and so strongly . . . and there was no wishful thinking there. No matter what, he wanted Marissa to be happy.

He shook off his thoughts, pushed off his pickup, grabbed a notebook and pencil from his backpack, and took a walk around the perimeter of the house, making notes of ideas that came to him. Dan had said it would end up looking like a cupcake on top of a dollhouse, but Johnny didn’t want a dollhouse. He wanted a yellow cake with blue decorations, elaborate vanilla icing, and red sprinkles.

He’d once seen a red metal roof on an old farmhouse, and he’d loved the way it looked. The idea of listening to rain falling on a metal roof eased his weary mind. The house also had a chimney, and a metal roof would be safer—as long as they also rigged a good grounding arrangement in case of lightning.

A large blue tarp draped over the would-be roof informed him that his brothers had gotten to work while Johnny had been busy signing the documents. He’d have to find a way to thank them. He didn’t know what he’d do without them.

The house’s biggest burden would soon be taken care of, while Johnny’s would remain. He sat on the back stoop and looked out onto the stream. The sound of water tumbling over rocks and pebbles soothed him, and he began to drum his pencil against his thigh in an accompanying, repetitive beat.

How could he tell Marissa how he felt about her? How could he say, “Hey, this is the way I feel, and even though I know you’re engaged, I think you should know. I’ll leave you alone now.”

Maybe if he did something to unsettle her a bit. Just enough to make her think, but not enough to make her take him so seriously that things became impossibly uncomfortable between them if she was truly happy with the status quo. Because that much he knew—he unsettled her. Only he didn’t know why. It could be the past. It could be a meaningless attraction on her part. But it could be that he brought out doubts about her future.

As he watched little white butterflies dance their way down the meadow, he began humming an old song to the rhythm of the pencil he was drumming against his thigh. Before long, a few simple songs came to mind. He grabbed his notebook and pencil and began scribbling down the names. He became so absorbed in what he was doing, he didn’t hear the truck drive up, or Sam and Dan’s footsteps until they were upon him and Dan was kicking at his foot.

He looked up. “We need to rehearse for Friday night at Huffy’s,” he said.

Sam frowned. “We don’t have time. It’s why we agreed to do an old set, remember?”

Johnny shoved the notebook under their noses. “It’s only one new song, the other two we’ve done before. And I want to sing the chorus on the second one.”

“No offense, but you can’t sing, remember?” Sam gave him an amused look.

“That chorus doesn’t really require singing.”

Dan sighed. “We can do the first two, but we really don’t have time to rehearse even just one new song.”

Johnny crossed his arms over his chest. “Two words for you: Toto Bros.”

“I don’t know why you hate the name so much. It’s catchy.” Dan grinned.

Johnny was not amused. “No more Cursed Amadors, no more Amador Brothers, just Toto Bros. Years of building a solid reputation, and it’s the only thing anyone remembers about us now.” Six months before, at the town’s renowned Christmas Eve Festival, Dan had begged them to play a song from Toto instead of their Christmas set to get a message through to Holly.

It had gone against their very grain. But they’d done it.

Sam grabbed Johnny’s notebook. “Isn’t this a bit obvious? You’re in enough trouble with the Medinas as it is, bro.”

“No. Obvious is having your brothers break their backs to finish a house in one week, so you could prove to a girl how much you love her because you can’t find the words.”

“You volunteered,” Sam reminded him. “And you made me wear a ruffled shirt and powder blue tux to Dan’s engagement party in exchange for your help.”

“And now I’m the one who needs help.”

Sam slapped his back, and Dan said, “Fine,” before sighing. “But I agree with Sam, the words are pretty obvious.”

“It’ll only be obvious to her. The only reason you guys get it is ’cause you know most of the story. We’ve done two of these songs before, a few times, and the third one isn’t too far off from what we usually do.”

Sam studied Johnny a moment before asking, “What are you hoping to accomplish here?”

Johnny breathed out a heavy sigh and raked a hand through his hair. “I want her to know how I feel in a way that’ll make her think—if that’s what she needs to do. But I also want to make it easy for her to ignore me—if that’s what she wants to do.”

Dan raised an eyebrow. “There’s a reason things seem to backfire for you when it comes to women, you know.”

Johnny shot him a look. “You mean, you’ve had the answers all along and you’ve never shared?”

Dan frowned, which meant he wasn’t joking around. “All I know is you usually hate making people uncomfortable, and that’s what leads you to look for ways to soften the blows. But Marissa’s engaged, Johnny. Don’t you think
this
will make her uncomfortable?”

“I don’t know what else to do. Doing nothing at all feels wrong. I only want to tell her how I feel from afar with a few songs. She can think on it or ignore it. It’s simple.”

Sam shook his head and sighed. “Simple. Right.”

F
riday turned out to be the most difficult and most rewarding day yet for Marissa. Editing the videos had been challenging. Most of the kids were media-savvy, and uploading the videos and the first part of the script had been a breeze. But it had been difficult to agree on what to edit out and what to leave in. It had caused major arguments. Marissa suspected nerves had a lot to do with it, too. It was the moment of truth. Come Monday, they’d find out whether they’d made it through to the second round.

The kids had decided their musical would start off in a gym, where students would gather around a flier announcing a dance competition. Two rival dance crews would declare they were entering, and winning, the competition, before beginning to try to one-up each other with moves until a dance fight broke out. They’d pored over music and lyrics in the public domain and had chosen snippets of old songs, which they’d cleverly adapted and choreographed into hip-hop. Javier’s character, Carlos, and Aleksandra’s character, Nadya, both members of the rival dance crews, would then meet and fall in love while they challenged each other to a dance-off.

Needless to say, by the end of the day, Marissa was happy, but pretty tired of scripts, songs, choreography, and lyrics. She couldn’t wait to see Brian and was glad she’d asked him to come earlier. It was good for Brian to have left work early, too. He worked too hard.

She got to his parents’ house just as he was getting out of his car. He looked tired in his crumpled-up suit, but happy to see her.

“Hey, beautiful.” He dropped a kiss on her head and hugged her to his side a moment before reaching for his briefcase, and Marissa couldn’t help but think that
beautiful
was a much more desirable endearment than
puppy-eyes
.

Marissa took his free hand as they started up the steps. Brian’s parents’ Arts and Crafts bungalow was perched on a small hill, and stone steps led directly from the sidewalk to the front porch.

Brian squeezed her hand before pausing. “Oh. Wait. Do you mind taking the ring off, just for today?”

“Why?”

“I haven’t told my parents yet . . . Mom’s been talking about helping you plan our wedding ever since we started getting serious, and I know she’ll want to get started on it right away.”

“
You haven’t told your parents?
”

Brian smiled and stroked her cheek with his thumb. “Calm down. I don’t talk to my parents every day on the phone, like you do. And I decided to propose the moment you got your job offer because everything came together for us. But it’s only been a week. I haven’t had time to tell them. I just don’t think now would be a good time. That’s all.”

Marissa giggled. “They probably already know, anyway. My mom’s told half the town. And I’ll be happy to have your mom help me plan the wedding. My mom wants to help, too, and Abuela Rosa is already trying to take over.” Marissa tugged at Brian’s hand and continued up the steps, but Brian stayed put.

“Oh,” he said. Marissa turned to look at him, a question in her eyes. He sighed. “The thing is, I think we should hire a professional wedding planner. I’m going to be managing public relations campaigns for major players in the Cincinnati area soon, and I’ll be expected to invite my new boss, a few coworkers, and clients to our wedding. It has to be a classy, well-managed event.”

So many thoughts came to Marissa at once, she barely knew where to start. “It’s my wedding, too, Brian,” she finally managed.

Brian quickly climbed up the two steps separating them, kissed her lips, and looked into her eyes. “I know. And you can work with the wedding planner and have it be everything you’ve always dreamed of.”

“But I’ve always dreamed of planning it myself with the women in my life.”

Brian squeezed her hand. “I’m not trying to get my way here. I’m suggesting a compromise. Our moms can be involved, too, but I think it’s best to have all the details orchestrated by a professional.”

“I can compromise, too, but not on the size of the wedding, Bri. I get having your boss and maybe a few coworkers, but clients, too? Don’t you think that’ll be turning it into something it’s not?”

Brian sighed. “Look, I wasn’t expecting to come down here today.” He shot her a look, reminding her she was the one who’d asked him to come down early. “I’ve had a long day, I’m tired, and I’m not in the mood to go through this with my mom right now. Can you just take your ring off for now, in case she hasn’t found out? We can escape to Huffy’s in a little while, to say hi to Marty and relax, and we can talk about it there. We’ll hit on something that makes us both happy, and we’ll tell my parents tomorrow. I promise.”

Brian’s mom came out then, and Marissa quickly hid her hands behind her back, took off her ring, and buried it in her pocket, where the big diamond jabbed at her hip bone. There would be time to talk things through later.

But both she and Brian had forgotten that Friday night at Huffy’s was no place to talk privately. Not that it mattered much. Marissa was no longer in the mood to get into wedding plans. She just wanted to relax and have a good time.

She looked around at the cozy, welcoming interior. Her brother had done a great job, and she was so proud. He’d always been personable, outgoing, well-liked, and well-known. He excelled at sports and school, and had always had a great head for business. Their parents loved telling stories about him and his baseball stand near the baseball field, his golf ball stand near the golf course, and his tennis ball stand near the tennis courts. He’d find errant balls and sell them to people who had lost all of theirs. He’d only been five.

But her thoughts took another direction when she noticed that Dan and Sam kept shooting glances at her and Brian, and then at each other. Men did not know how to be subtle, it seemed. Had Johnny told them about the masquerade party? About how it was her in the elevator and not Melinda? She wasn’t good with attention. It made her feel as if her insecurities were exposed.

“I hear you two are engaged,” Holly said, smiling. “Congratulations.” Marissa would swear Holly sent Dan a warning glance. Had she noticed his strange looks, too?

“Thank you.” Marissa smiled back. “How are your wedding plans coming along? It’s in less than a month!”

“Everything’s been easy-peasy,” Holly answered, but her eyes were bright with humor.

“Right.” Dan rolled his eyes and everyone laughed.

Holly shrugged and laughed along. “Easy because we’re getting married in the backyard of the house where we met, and food, flowers, and decorations have been fun to pick out, but so many people are coming! We’ve had to extend into our neighbors’ side yards and rent more tents in case it rains. And the seating arrangements for the reception have been a nightmare.”

“Seating arrangements.” Dan shook his head. “I don’t understand why everyone can’t just sit where they want, but Emily and Holly say that would be an even bigger nightmare. But I can’t wait.”

Marissa studied Dan, feeling surprised and a little awed. He was five or six years older than her, so they’d never been close, but she’d always gotten the impression that he was a hard person to get close to, regardless of any age differences. He’d always been nice to her and had helped her with homework from time to time, but it was odd to see someone who’d always looked so standoffish publicly declaring he couldn’t wait to get married.

Marissa had gotten to know Holly a few years ago and they’d hit it off immediately, but they hadn’t had a chance to spend much time together since then. Hearing Holly and Dan disagree on seating arrangements did her good, though. It reminded her that it was normal for her and Brian to disagree on a few things when it came to their wedding plans.

Dan looked at his watch then, kissed Holly, and said, “Time to set up.” He got up and his eyes strayed to where Marissa and Brian’s hands were joined, and then quickly back up to meet Sam’s eyes. Marissa wished she wasn’t so aware of the attention. A moment later, he and Sam left, and Marissa decided she’d imagined the whole thing.

Marty, who’d been walking around and talking to people, now stepped up onto the small stage and took the mike. “Tonight we have an old crowd favorite. Give it up for Toto Bros,” he announced with a clap. Almost everyone at their table burst out laughing. “Toto Bros?” Brian smiled and looked around. They were obviously missing out on an inside joke.

“Well, if Marty wanted to get back at Johnny, he chose a great way,” someone farther down the table said, and Marissa stifled a sigh. Had everyone found out about Saturday night?

“Looking forward to hearing them, it’s been a while.” Brian sat back and draped an arm across the back of Marissa’s chair.

It
had
been a while. The brothers got onto the stage and she sat back, too.

Being there, with old and new friends and acquaintances, she felt both relaxed and entertained. It got her to thinking about where she and Brian would live. Everything had happened so fast—his eventual job transfer, her new job, their engagement—they’d barely had a chance to talk about it. So far, they’d only decided it would be a midpoint between their jobs.

Marty sat down with them, looking ready to enjoy the show, and Marissa hoped it meant he wanted to bury the hatchet with Johnny. Sam played an energized riff that got the crowd instantly revved up, and Marissa smiled as exuberance took over their table. The riff was familiar, but she didn’t recognize the song until Dan stepped up to the microphone and began to sing. It was Aerosmith’s “Love in an Elevator.”

Love in an elevator . . .
Marissa’s smile slowly melted away and she felt her body go hot and cold, then hot again. The song, the crowd’s energy, and their table’s good time faded to black as her disordered thoughts flitted between thinking it was a coincidence, and worrying that Johnny had chosen the song just for her.

The song ended and everyone but her seemed keyed up and ready for the next song. A familiar and easily recognizable beat made her heart sink farther down into her chest, till it felt like a rock in her belly. “Yeah!” Brian laughed, when he realized they were playing Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher.” Marissa felt herself sink into her chair.

Johnny wouldn’t . . . Not here . . . Not at her brother’s pub, of all places . . .

Would he?

“I’m hot for teacher,” Brian said with a wink, unnerving her even further. People around them heard his comment and looked over at them with amused smiles. Marty shot Brian a dirty look, then turned to roll his eyes at Marissa, but he paused when he looked at her face. Marissa forced her lips to curve into a smile again, but it felt stiff and phony. She slid her gaze away, but held the corners of her mouth up. She wasn’t good at hiding her emotions, and it felt as if those who knew her best would soon guess her secret.

That she and Johnny had kissed. That, try as she might, she couldn’t forget it, and Johnny didn’t want her to. That it was making her feel awful—especially now, with her fiancé sitting
right next to her
. But reason told her that no matter how exposed she felt, there was no way anyone else could guess her feelings and thoughts, or the moment she and Johnny had shared.

The chorus came on then . . . and Johnny sang it. Solo. Johnny never sang. Everyone knew that.

At that moment, she hated him. Her feelings of hatred were so strong that it was becoming impossible not to squirm.

Brian squeezed her shoulder and gave her a suggestive look, and Marissa tried hard to appear amused. He studied her for a moment before shifting his gaze back to the stage, where Johnny was ending the chorus, and Brian’s eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. If she hadn’t been so hyperaware, she’d have missed it.

The song felt endless, and Marissa wanted to flee before the next song came on, before Johnny could push any more buttons. But she forced herself to stay put. The last thing she wanted was to draw attention to herself.

The telling strums from Dan’s bass made her clench her fists on her lap. “Jessie’s Girl” by Rick Springfield. A few women gathered in front of the stage, swaying and singing to the song about a guy secretly wanting another guy’s girl.

Of all the arrogant, cocky, mean-spirited . . . Marissa seethed, but was not surprised. Johnny had already proven that he didn’t really care that her fiancé was in the crowd, which proved he didn’t really care at all. He’d probably done it all just to piss her off.

After feeling Marty’s eyes on her for the umpteenth time, she racked her brain for a suitable excuse, and finally came up with, “The food’s almost here and I haven’t washed my hands.” She got up and walked steadily to the restroom. The song’s plucky rhythm and words followed her, mocking her.

She’d kill him. That’s what she’d do. Kill him. He was making her feel like the world’s worst girlfriend. The three brothers kept singing and plucking away, as if someone in the audience wasn’t plotting to murder one of them, with everyone clapping, tapping, or singing along.

Marissa braced her hands on either side of the sink, and willed her heart to calm down so she could bring order to her thoughts. But she was feeling so utterly betrayed that calm and order wouldn’t come.

She splashed cold water on her face and decided to grab Brian and leave. Calm and order would come when the two of them could be alone again.

But when she stepped out of the restroom, she ran straight into Johnny. Before she knew what she was doing, she had one hand on his chest and was shoving him toward the back door, hissing, “How dare you? Brian was right there! How could you?” The back door was slightly open, and Johnny nearly stumbled outside.

He found his footing and grabbed her hand. Their gazes locked. “I didn’t know Brian would be here.
I swear.
When I saw him, it was too late. But now I’ve said my piece.
I had to.
And now you know how I feel.”