Fixation (11 page)

“Maya!”

Balam’s voice acted like a slap in the face, shocking me back into the present, where I found myself with my hands gripping the lip of the cauldron, my body hoisted up halfway up the sides.

What the hell?

Balam grabbed me around the waist. I immediately let go of the cauldron and dropped back to the ground, Balam’s hands steadying me as I landed. The compulsion to climb into the cauldron still nagged at me, but now it came from outside me, buzzing in my ear like a persistent mosquito. I shook my head, trying to clear my head. Balam drew me away from the cauldron, moving me towards the far exit.

“Are you all right?” He tilted my head up towards him with a finger under my chin, green gold eyes staring into mine intently.

“I ... I think so.” I looked back at the cauldron, still feeling the pull of it. “I wanted to climb inside it. I still do.”

“That is the one thing you must never do.” He gripped my shoulders with both hands. “To climb into the embrace of Evaki’s Cauldron means certain death.”

Of course it did.

We went into the little café in the museum. Balam ordered an espresso and I got a mocha, figuring I needed the chocolate and sugar to counteract the shock of my near-suicide-induced-by-supernatural-influence experience. Or something like that.

I took a sip of mocha, savoring the hot liquid combined with the cool sweetness of the whipped cream on top. “So was that your psycho bitch ex again?”

Balam shook his head. “I do not think so.”

I raised an eyebrow. Don’t tell me he was sticking up for the bitch. “Then why did I try to throw myself into that thing?”

“According to legends,” Balam said carefully, no doubt sensing my emotions, “the lure of Evaki’s Cauldron has drawn many people into its depths without any outside influence.”

“I though Evaki was all good and shit.” Childish, yeah, but I couldn’t help it. I felt betrayed.

“Evaki is like any other god or goddess: an elemental force of nature. How her power manifests is dependent upon those who worship her. And the gods and goddesses of the Ancient World have always thrived on the life force of their followers.”

“I think you just came up with the ultimate definition of religion.” I drank more mocha.

“There are certain deities that veer towards either the dark or the light,” said Balam, “but for the most part, even those associated with evil for centuries gained that taint through mankind’s belief.”

Okay, there was an entire evening’s worth of conversational fodder, way too much to even start to think about now.

“So what’s the deal with the cauldron? You’re saying if I’d climbed inside, I’d be dead?”

Balam’s face tightened. “Dead or lost beyond any hope of ever being found.”

I nodded carefully, trying not to dwell on the fact I’d now had two near-death experiences within twenty-four hours. If I thought about it too closely, I’d freak out. And a freak-out was obviously not a luxury I had about now.

“It’s like the
Black Cauldron
,” I said, my brain flashing back to a book I’d read as a kid.

It was Balam’s turn to raise a quizzical eyebrow.

“It’s a fantasy book,” I explained. “There’s this death lord, Arawn or something like that, and he has a cauldron that makes deathless warriors called Cauldron Born, kind of like zombies except they don’t eat people. And the bodies are already dead when they go in. A living person—” I paused and thought back for a moment, trying to remember what happened in the book. “The cauldron was destroyed when a living person threw himself in as a willing sacrifice.”

Balam nodded. “Many cultures have their own version of various legends. And most legends have a basis in fact. Evaki’s Cauldron is said to hold the sun after it sets every night, so to climb inside at night would mean incineration, although some say it can trigger a rebirth. During the hours of daylight, the Cauldron holds an endless, icy void where one would wander in eternal darkness, their life force feeding Evaki.”

Charming. I wasn’t loving Evaki all that much at the moment, but I guess she was a better alternative to Anani since at least the goddess had the sense to
not
want to cast the world into endless night. Anani, in my opinion, was a power-hungry fruitcake. I decided to get the point. “So what do we do now?”

“We wait until the museum closes and perform the ritual I hope will free my fellow shamans and strip Anani of her power before she can do any more harm.”

“You do realize they have security guards on duty, right?”

“Not in Dream Time.”

Balam grinned at me, green eyes glinting with those otherworldly golden lights. I noticed a couple of teenage girls a few tables away staring at him and whispering to one another behind their hands. Both wore skinny jeans and identical pink baby-doll T-shirts with rhinestones spelling out the word “Princess” across their chests.

Charming.

One of them looked at me, then back at Balam with a disbelieving shake of her head, then said something to her friend, who nodded. I guess they thought Balam should come with a sign that read, “Must be
this
attractive to date me.”

I turned my attention away from the annoying and undoubtedly tramp-stamped little twerps and back to Balam.

“If we’ll be doing this ritual in Dream Time, can’t we just ... dream our way into the museum?”

Balam leaned back in his chair, the white cotton fabric of his shirt hugging his well-toned torso. I tried not to stare too obviously. The two ”princesses,” on the other hand, didn’t bother with subtlety. I thought of offering them napkins to wipe up the drool.

“Dream Time is not that simple,” he said.

“Of course it’s not,” I muttered, taking solace in my mocha.

“Entering a building or dwelling while in Dream Time does not guarantee one will find themselves in the time period they expect. We could find ourselves in this museum as it was ten years ago, with a different exhibit entirely. If, however, we are in the museum itself when we enter Dream Time ... we have a grounding in the present reality to guide us.”

I stared at him, trying to make sense of what he just said.

“So you’re saying to make this work, we have to, like, hide in the museum bathrooms like high school kids on a dare until it closes?”

He nodded. “Something like that, yes.”

“And this ritual. What is it?”

“I need to invoke enough power to retrieve the lost spirits of the other shamans from the spirit world of Evaki’s Cauldron. To do so, I must enlist the help of the five spirits who guard it.”

“The Jaguar statues?”

He nodded.

“Will I be able to help with that?”

He leaned forward, took my hands and stared into my eyes with great sincerity.

“I cannot do it without you, Maya.”

“Good.”

“Very good, indeed.” A smolder now backlit the sincerity in his gaze. I felt the heat all the way down to my toes and looked at him suspiciously.

“Is there sex involved with this ritual?”

He stroked my palms with his thumbs, gently, seductively. “Sex magic is strong, Maya. Almost as strong as powers invoked with blood.” He lowered his voice to a seductive purr, all honey and whiskey and sex. I shivered with an unbidden thrill of desire as he continued, “With the power the two of us can draw from the universe, we stand a chance of defeating Anani.”

“So that would be a yes to the ‘is there sex involved’ question?”

Mister Sex-on-a-Stick grinned at me. “Even if the ritual didn’t call for it, I would advocate its inclusion. Just to be safe.”

Eat your heart out, “Princesses.”

I couldn’t believe it. Here I was, crouched on a toilet seat one of the men’s restrooms at the museum, feet precariously balanced on one side of the lid in the hopes that if a roaming security guard opened the stall door, it would conceal me from his or her sight. I mean, seriously, this was about as high school a stunt as I could think of—and the only thing that made it bearable was the knowledge Balam was crouched in the stall next to mine.

“You know this isn’t going to work,” I said in a low voice. “This kind of thing only works in bad movies. I mean, seriously.”

“It will work,” said Balam, which was what he’d been saying in response to my objections for the last few hours.

“If someone comes in here and opens these doors, they will totally see us. Unless you have the power to cloud men’s minds or something like that.”

Balam chuckled. “Something like that.”

I started to say something else, but then remembered how he’d smoothed over Jeri’s and Patrick’s objections and doubts about being shipped the wrong jaguar. Anyone who could get those two to mellow out that quickly over something as potentially disastrous as that possibly could cloud men’s minds. But if that were the case—

“Are you saying we could be hiding in plain sight anywhere in the museum without being noticed?”

There was a discernable pause. Then, “Yes.”

“Then why the hell are we hiding in the men’s room?”

Another pause.

“It was your idea.”

I would kill him. But first I was getting off this stupid toilet seat and giving my cramped leg muscles a break.

Before I could implement any of these plans, the sound of footsteps froze me in place. The men’s room door opened with a creak.

“Hello? Folks, the museum is closed.” A flashlight beam played across the floor and the footsteps approached the stalls. The security guard pushed open the stall door on the other side of me, and let it swing back with a thump. I barely breathed as the door to my stall was pushed open and the flashlight beam shone inside—and somehow missed me altogether. I mean, it passed over me, but instead of my body being illuminated in the beam, it was as if my body swallowed the light.

The guard moved onto the next stall—Balam’s—with the same result. As he repeated the process down the line of stalls, I felt frustration radiating from the guard, a combination of certainty that he’d heard voices and confusion that there was no one—that he could see, at least—in the bathroom.

“Maybe I should get my ears checked,” he muttered as he stomped out of the room.

We waited a few minutes until the sound of the guard’s footsteps receded down the hall and faded away entirely. Then we both climbed down from the toilet seats and out of the stalls.

“That was a pretty good Jedi mind trick,” I said in an undertone.

Balam grinned at me. “We were not the droids he was looking for.”

I rolled my eyes, amused yet irritated. Pop culture references were my domain, not his, but at least he’d actually seen
Star Wars
and hadn’t just given me his patented blank “you do not make sense to me” look.

“So now what, Obi Wan?”

“We enter Dream Time.”

“Can we leave the men’s restroom first?”

Balam chuckled and took my hand. We exited the men’s room, pushing the door open with caution before walking into the hallway. My footsteps seemed unnaturally loud in the empty hall, now only dimly lit by emergency lights set into the floor. Balam, on the other hand, walked with the proverbial little cat’s paws, moving with a silent grace that echoed the prowling stride of a jaguar. The two “princesses” would be creaming their skinny jeans if they could see him now.

The sound of voices drifted down the stairwell from the main level of the museum. We froze in place. The words were indistinct, but the distinctive click of tumblers locking into place as the front doors were secured for the night told us we’d probably heard the last of the staff, excepting the security guard, leaving.

A thought occurred to me. “What if someone else is working late?” I asked. “I mean, there’s no guarantee there aren’t people doing overtime.”

“If there are, I will use my”— he grinned at me again—”Jedi mind tricks. Once we are in Dream Time, no one in this time or place will be able to see us.”

“Let’s hurry up and get there, then.” The thought of discovery made me very nervous. I’ve never been much of a lawbreaker.

“Very well.” Taking my hand, Balam led me to the entrance to the Ancient Gods exhibit, the Colossal guarding the front looking especially foreboding in the dim lighting.

Balam drew me to him, one arm wrapped around my waist, hand pressing my hips against his. The other hand cupped my chin, tilting my head back so he could stare down into my eyes. “Are you ready?” he whispered, mouth so close to mine I could feel the warmth of his breath.

I nodded, unconsciously molding my body closer to his as he lowered his lips to mine and kissed me. I closed my eyes and let the pure animal sensuality of the embrace take me outside myself. His tongue tangled with mine, taking my breath away as I kissed him back, hands running over the hard muscles of his back and shoulders as his rising erection pressed against me.

I’ve never been one to engage in public displays of affection or had any desire to screw in public places, but this man brought out the animal in me. I ground my hips against his, wanting more. Craving all of him right then and there.

I gave a little moan of protest when he lifted his lips from mine.

“Greedy,” he murmured.

I growled at him and he laughed.

“Oh, my Maya, you delight me.” There was such unabashed joy in his voice; it made my heart swell with the certainty the two of us could conquer any obstacle and make the world our own. Balam was a mood-altering drug all on his own.

“Shall we?”

“Huh?” I looked at him in confusion. “Don’t you have to zap us into Dream Time here?”

“We are already there.”

I stared at him, confused, then looked at my surroundings.

At first everything seemed exactly as it had been only minutes earlier. The Colossal stared blankly into the distance.

Then I looked more closely at the giant head and noticed the formerly blank eyes now sported dark pupils, its gaze now darting around and down the hallway. And the dim lighting? The floor and walls of the hallways now shimmered with an iridescence that reminded me of multicolored glitter ground into a fine dust, like the makeup counters at Sephora. Everything, from the pictures on the walls to the walls themselves, even the skylights above, seemed to take on a subtle life of their own.

“Everything looks alive,” I said in hushed tones.

“Everything
is
alive,” Balm replied. “We just don’t see it, for the most part.”

I stared around me, enthralled with the ways the walls shimmered in a myriad of living colors.

“It’s beautiful,” I said softly.

The Colossal seemed to smile in approval at my words. I smiled shyly back. “Shall we?” Balam offered me his arm and together we walked into the Ancient Gods exhibit. I nodded at the Colossal as we walked by it. I’m not entirely sure, but I think it winked at me.

I looked around in wonderment. All the objects in the exhibit were sentient, glowing with a strange iridescence and moving, rippling on the surface as if they were breathing. As if everything was breathing. Shadowed corners seemed darker and I could sense movement everywhere, as if things hid in the darkness, too shy to emerge. I didn’t sense any malice or danger, but there was a feeling of things ... alien. Otherworldly.

It reminded me of once when I was a kid and had gone to Disneyland with my parents for a special work event held at night. We’d gone into the Haunted Mansion at dusk and come out in full dark and the rest of the evening had seemed like a magical dream to me. Surreal, yet more real than anything I’d experienced before.

“Look,” I whispered, pointing to Jaguar Baby. It was moving, features more clearly defined than they’d been earlier, shifting between jaguar cub and human infant as the statue pulsed with life, lifeless stone taking on the color and texture of skin and fur. The baby looked as though it was about to cry, its face screwing up the way babies and toddlers do when they’re getting ready for a good howl. Before anything emerged, however, it shifted back to jaguar and the squalling of a hungry feline cub came out instead. I wanted to pick it up and comfort it.

Balam said a few quiet words in whatever ancient language it was he spoke and patted the Jaguar Baby on the head. Whatever he said soothed it and the cries/squalls quieted to an occasional burbling mewl.

Across the room Jaguar Boy straightened out of his crouch and stretched like a sleepy child waking up from a nap. The various masks on the walls grimaced and grinned, depending on their facial features. Whispers and soft animal noises filled the room and the galleries beyond.

Energy thrummed through the air and through my body. I felt more alive than I’d ever felt, with the exception of my jungle romp with Balam, even though I thought that had been a dream. It was as if I could feel the tide ebbing and flowing in my blood. I felt every inch of fabric from my jeans and shirt against my skin, invisible currents in the air caressing my face, blowing my hair off my neck.

“Don’t be frightened,” said Balam as something chattered in a far corner.

“I’m not,” I said, even as I caught a glimpse of fur and very sharp teeth from the same corner. “We’re not in any danger, right?”

“Not yet.” Jaguar Baby rubbed its head against Balam’s hand, begging for attention. Balam almost absentmindedly scratched behind its now feline ears and continued, “In this particular Dream Time, some of the inhabitants are friendly and some curious about us. Some know who I am and others sense
what
I am since I am a familiar visitor in their realm. You ... you are new.”

“And that’s a good thing?”

“It can be.”

As if to prove his words, Jaguar Baby reached out a paw and touched my arm. I cautiously held out a hand for him to smell and was rewarded with a raspy lick and a low chuffing sound. Balam chuckled as I cooed in delight and scritched Jaguar Baby under his chin.

“Come.”

We walked further into the room. Jaguar Baby leapt off its pedestal and padded after us. Other things followed as well, keeping more of a distance and sticking to the shadows. The masks watched our progress, and other statues turned as we passed them. The ground beneath my feet softened, giving way to grass in patches even as lush tropical vegetation curled around the base of the exhibits and tall trees covered with vines arched overhead. These changes merged with the existing structure, the walls and ceilings seeming to expand upwards and away into the distance one minute, and remain static the next.

Welcome to Dream Time.

Jaguar Boy gave a low growl when we reached him, then bounded around Balam’s legs like a kitten. Jaguar Baby toddled over to him and wrapped all four paws/limbs around Jaguar Boy’s back legs, worrying them with its teeth like a chew toy. Jaguar Boy promptly rolled Jaguar Baby on its back and sat on him.

We left the two happily playing and entered the second gallery, where Jaguar Youth was slowly stretching, the young athlete warming up his limbs. He straightened and gave us a wary look when we entered, more human than jaguar at the moment. He recognized Balam almost immediately, the wariness vanishing beneath a broad smile. He spoke, in the same ancient Mesoamerican language Balam was using. I would have killed for subtitles as Balam replied to what was obviously an anxious question. His answer didn’t appear to entirely satisfy Jaguar Youth, who still looked worried.

“What’s going on?” I asked, trying not to be nervous as Jaguar Youth’s attention focused on me, eyes narrowing. My nerves took a turn for the worse when Jaguar Warrior strode over to us before Balam could answer me, gesturing towards me with his spear as he spoke vehemently and rapidly to Balam, displeasure clear in his voice and body language.

Balam replied in measured tones, calm yet firm. Jaguar Warrior shook his head and thumped the butt of his spear on the floor.

I clutched Balam’s arm and whispered in his ear. “What’s wrong?”

“They are not inclined to help us. They want to know why I have brought you here with me.” Balam spoke in the same calm tones he used with Jaguar Warrior, as if worried any deviation might spark problems.

I flinched as Jaguar Warrior replied in an angry growl and slammed his spear down on the ground again. Jaguar Youth circled behind us, sniffing the air around me as if scenting for danger.

“They seem upset.” I know, call me Captain Obvious.

“The last woman I brought into their presence was Anani,” Balam explained quietly. “And she betrayed their trust along with mine.”

“So they think every woman is a back-stabbing psycho bitch?” I glared at Jaguar Warrior, who glowered back. “Tell them that whack job tried to kill me too and that I’m on your side.”

Balam spoke to them again, gesturing towards me and directing most of his words to Jaguar Warrior, probably a smart move ‘cause he had that big nasty spear.

I felt something press against my ankles and looked down to see Jaguar Baby, rubbing against me for more pets. A small furry hand slipped into mine as Jaguar Boy leaned against me, looking up at me trustingly before he turned to face Jaguar Warrior with a stubborn expression. My heart melted.

“See?” I said defiantly. “These two trust me.”

Balam spoke rapidly, pointing at Jaguars Baby and Boy.

Jaguar Warrior gave a dismissive snort and muttered something that made both Jaguar Baby and Boy growl deep in their throats.

“What?” I asked.

“He says these two trust anyone and that they are young fools.”

Oh, for crying out loud...

“Don’t tell me. He had the hots for her too, right?” .

Balam’s lack of answer was answer enough.

“Thought so. And these two.” I indicated Jaguar Baby and Boy. “Did they trust Anani?”

Balam shook his head slowly. “No, they did not.”

“Thought so. That’s because they think with their hearts, not with their penises.” I glared at Jaguar Warrior for good measure, who looked as though he had an idea of what I’d just said and wasn’t too happy about it.