Fish Out of Water (7 page)

“So why are you here if Clark is so harsh on you?” I ask, going back to my endless scales.

“It was the lesser of two evils.”

“What happened to your parents?”

“They got sick of me.”

I pause. What his uncle said comes back, how this summer isn’t turning out how Dylan wanted. “So…they threw you out?”

“Yup.” He slouches more, and I feel like I’ve been kicking a puppy that lost its two front legs.

“I’m back!” Clark calls. He holds a few Subway bags, and Dylan runs to him like he can’t stand another second of not eating. His uncle holds the bags back. “Let me check something first. Mika, how was he?”

My eyebrows raise. “What?”

“Was he nice?”

Dylan gives me the saddest look in the world, and somehow I know his eating relies completely on what I say next. I don’t like this pressure. He might be mean, but he doesn’t deserve this weird punishment. And I shouldn’t be the one to decide. “He was fine,” I say. “Quiet, mostly.”

“Good. We’re making progress.” Clark hands Dylan his sandwich. He grabs it and steps back like his uncle still might take it away. “If you keep being civil, maybe I’ll give you food privileges soon.”

Shreya and I look at each other, and I wonder if her “What the hell is going on?” expression matches my own.

Clark hands us sandwiches, too, and then sighs. “Well, I got a call from Miriam at the store. Sounds like Tanya didn’t show, so I need to go in. Dylan, would you prefer to haul more pet food or enjoy the beach with Mika?”

Dylan looks at me, feigning surprise. How did he call that? “You mean you’d give me a day off?”

“I told you that’s how it works. If you make good choices, you get good things. Plain and simple.”

Dylan nods. “I guess I’ll stay here then.”

“Great! I’ll come back for you at six.” Clark turns to me. “Don’t let him leave, Mika.”

I nod, feeling like a traitor.

When Clark goes, Shreya and I head to our towels to eat. Dylan doesn’t join us. He’s maybe twenty feet away, devouring his lunch like he hasn’t had food in weeks. Shreya watches him, and I flick her leg. “Ow! Can’t I enjoy the view?”

“What view?”

She glares at me. “C’mon, Mika. You can’t tell me he’s not gorgeous. How did you not notice? Even I can see that and I’m not boy crazy like you and Olivia.”

“Uh, hello? Did you hear anything that came out of his mouth?”

She shakes her head, still staring at him. “I’m starting to forget.”

I roll my eyes, even though I might agree with her more than I want to admit. With the afternoon heat upon us, the sand will start drying faster. We need to get the dragon finished before then. When we get back to work, I’m keenly aware of the fact that Dylan hasn’t left the beach yet. He occasionally looks at me, but mostly stares at the ocean. I can’t imagine what’s going through his head.

Hours pass. Our dragon looks awesome. Shreya did an amazing job with his facial expression, and as we put on the finishing touches the crowd around us becomes a solid ring of people and camera phones.

I spot Dylan on the cliff, looking down at our work from the same place I surveyed it this morning. I can’t quite tell, but I think he’s smiling.

Chapter 10

The koi gather at the edge of my pond in the backyard, right near my feet. They swim over each other, excited, and I smile. Who says fish are dumb? They know just as well as any pet that it’s feeding time, and they have an incredible sense of smell. They don’t react this way to anyone but me.

My parents’ voices float out the kitchen window. I can’t quite make out what they’re saying, but the tones are not nice. Again. This has been the case for over a week now. My dad doesn’t want to stay home anymore. We all want Betty in a care facility, but it would cost like a third of their income even with Uncle Greg’s help. I don’t know what they’ll do with her if we don’t have the money. Hopefully not anything crazy. Like keep her around.

I sprinkle the food over my koi, and they gobble it up like the endlessly hungry fish they are. At least it’s mostly peaceful out here. Our backyard is one of my favorite places. Though it’s small, there’s a giant tree that takes up most of the space. The limbs are so thick even an adult can sit on them. My koi pond is right under that, surrounded by bushes, with a small waterfall at the far end. The rest of the space is devoted to a deck with lounge chairs.

Stooping down, I reach out to pet my fish. Shreya once told me that was creepy, but I don’t care. They aren’t slimy like people usually assume. It’s more like silky.

“They sure like you,” Betty says, and I jump up in surprise. What is she, a ninja? She stands right next to me, her eyebrows raised high. “Sorry, I scared you.”

“No, it’s fine. Just didn’t hear you.” I eye her warily, never sure of what I’ll get when she opens her mouth. The doctor my parents took her to said she was likely in the beginning of moderate Alzheimer’s, which I guess means she’ll need more and more help.

She points her thumb back at the house. “Do they always fight like that?”

I look away. “Actually, no.”

“Ah, so it’s my fault.”

“Yup.” I figure she should know how much she’s invaded our lives, even if she might not remember tomorrow.

She stoops down by the pond, puts her fingers in the water. My fish scatter. “At least you have parents who care.”

Though I don’t really want to talk to her, my curiosity betrays me because maybe I’ll get more stories about my dad. If he won’t tell me what happened, Betty is all I have. “You didn’t?”

“I used to, until the war.” Her hand stops, one finger still in the water. “Gracie, why’d you have to go first? Everything would have been better if it was me.”

“What are you talking about?”

She shoots up, her face way too close to mine. In her eyes, I’m sure I see fear. “Do you know what happens in those homes? That’s where they send you when you’re too far gone. That’s where I’m going to
die.
Alone. I bet Martin won’t even visit me!”

Whoa, talk about swift topic change.
“You mean my dad, Stan?”

“See? It won’t be long until I can’t say anything.” She bursts into tears, and I don’t know what to do. It seems cold just to stand there and watch her, but last time I tried to touch her she said she didn’t want my “dirty hands” on her. “I don’t want to die, but there’s nothing else left to do.”

“Those care centers aren’t
that
bad. Have you talked to my parents about it?” Because this is way too heavy for me. Why does she always pick me when she wants to say crazy stuff?

She wipes at her tears like an angry child. “They don’t like me. Honestly, I don’t like them very much either.”

I don’t like you, either.
“But you’d still rather stay here?”

She nods.

My stomach turns with guilt, thinking about how she’d rather be with people trying to get rid of her. Her life must suck if she thinks that’s a good option. “Why?”

Her face goes blank again, and I have a feeling she can’t remember. But then she sighs. “I miss my Stan, even if he never missed me, just like I miss my sister and my Greg and my Martin and my dad. Why do I still miss my dad? Why can’t I forget that instead?”

“What happened to your dad?” I ask.

That gets me one of the worst glares yet. “Go to hell, dirty Jap.”

My eyes widen as I watch her storm back to the house. I stand there, stunned. No one has ever called me that to my face. It hurts. Even knowing she’s losing her mind, it doesn’t stop it from repeating over and over in my head. I’ve been as patient as I can with my grandmother, with this person who deserves no kindness from me, and this is what I get. I blink back tears as her screaming comes from the house.

“You’re all going to hell! I hate you! You ruined my life! You ruined the world!”

Screw it.

My parents better put her in a facility tomorrow. I’ll even pack her stuff and drive her there as long as I never have to deal with this crap again. Instead of going inside, I head around the house to the front. Mom’s zen garden is finally back in place, and I hop along the stepping stones until I reach the porch.

My bag is still inside. I haven’t eaten breakfast. I don’t even have my uniform on yet, just yoga pants and a t-shirt. But I unlock my bike and go.

I have to get away from here, because if I tell my parents they’ll just freak out more and I’m so sick of drama. Give me my old life back, please.

It would be nice if I could ride to a beach or the Aquarium to watch the fish all day. Better yet, I wish I had a boat so I could go out on the bay and be surrounded by the ocean. But I have work. Stupid work. I take the long way, trying to calm myself down so I won’t risk bursting into tears.

Dylan would revel in that.

We may have reached a silent truce in the last week, but the image of him sneering at me steels my face. I won’t be weak in front of him. Not ever.

“I think you forgot something,” Dylan says when I get to work.

I grab the blue apron from one of the shelves in the Aquatics island. It’ll have to do for today. I just hope Clark doesn’t ask any questions. “I forgot a lot of things, actually. Did you clean the tanks yet?”

“Of course not.”

I pinch the bridge of my nose. We’ve gotten to the point that he’ll do stuff when I ask him to, but if I don’t mention it he pretends it magically doesn’t need to be done. “Good. I need to scrub.”

His eyebrows go up. “Did something happen to you?”

“Why would you care?” I grab the cleaning supplies. “Go check the shelves to see if there’s anything we need to restock.”

“Okay…”

His expression might be concern, but I’m already too upset to be impressed by his small show of compassion. I grab the big magnetic scrubber, attach it to the glass, and get to work. Try to forget the words she said. Think of anything else. Everything else. She’s just a crazy old lady who doesn’t know what she’s saying.

Which is actually
more
frustrating, because I can’t cuss her out for being such an awful person. She probably wouldn’t even remember if I did.

“Ugh!” I struggle to get the magnetic scrubber off the glass. They are super strong and get slippery in the water. “Stupid thing!”

“Mika?”

I look up to see Clark staring at me like I’ve sprouted horns. I stand straight and wipe the water off my hands. “Yes?”

He looks over my outfit disapprovingly. “Did that tank do something to hurt your feelings?”

“Sorry.” I stare at my feet, realizing how crazy I must look.

“Dylan said there was something wrong with you, but I didn’t expect him to be right.”

I snap my head up, eyes wide. He tattled on me? After all the times these last two weeks I restrained myself? I’ll kill him for this, freaking hypocrite. “I just…it’s…family stuff.”

“What happened?” His voice is so kind when he says it, but I can’t bring myself to explain.

“It’s personal,” I choke out. He would never understand, and I can’t bring myself to say the insult.

He nods. “Well, I’m sorry for whatever it is, but I hope this doesn’t happen again. You have to wear the uniform, Mika. It’s not like you to ignore rules, so I’ll assume this is a one-time thing.”

“Definitely.”

“I need to feed the kittens, but if you feel like talking at some point feel free to holler at me. I know family stuff can be hard—we’ve had our fair share lately, with you know who.”

“Like what?” I ask before I can stop myself. Despite my best efforts, I’m still curious as to how Dylan ended up here. He is kind of ruining my life, so I feel like I deserve to know.

He purses his lips. “My brother and I don’t exactly get along—very different world views, you could say. He’s always been overly ambitious, nearly cutthroat in how he approaches life—he thinks I’m a lazy slob.”

Clark is a bit odd, but “lazy slob” is definitely the wrong descriptor. “But you own a business, and you work really hard to keep it running.”

“Why thank you, Mika.” He smiles wide, like he’s relieved to have validation. “I feel the same way, but my brother doesn’t think much of one pet store when he owns…well, it’s a lot more than one store. He’s never even come to visit this ‘dirty flea hole’, so.”

I raise an eyebrow, curious. If Dylan grew up with such a stuck-up sounding father, no wonder he’s so condescending. “What does he do?”

Clark waves it off. “It doesn’t matter, but suffice it to say I never liked how much they neglected Dylan, and yet also expected him to do everything they told him to. They sent him off to boarding school so they didn’t have to deal with him. Now they’re not happy with how he turned out, and I find it rather…frustrating.”

“Is that why you took him in?”

“Partly,” he says, looking at the school of fish nearest him. “Also because I believe family is family, even when they’re not behaving how you’d like. Of course you can’t be an enabler, but you don’t just throw people away. Especially in their darkest hours, when they need you the most.”

His words hit me right in the gut. Scary how much they apply to me. “You really think that?”

He nods. “Now get back to scrubbing, and I expect you to change at lunch.”

“Yes, sir.”

As I continue cleaning the tanks, Clark’s words repeat in my head. Mom has always told me that taking the high road is better, even though it’s harder, and I agree with Clark that you shouldn’t throw people out. But I’m not sure that applies when said “family member” has never been part of your life because your parents knew they’d only hurt you. Besides, wasn’t Betty the one who threw my parents out?

I don’t know what happened with Dylan, but he’s not Betty. She’s already had enough second chances. She needs to leave, and I’ll do what I have to in order to make that happen.

Dylan manages to avoid me until after lunch, but now he approaches the Aquatics island slowly, as if he’s trying not to anger a tiger. He better be careful, because I’m still pissed about him ratting me out. “You better scrub these tanks all week, otherwise I’ll tell Clark you’re still a jerk to me, and he’ll make you clean up all the poop in the store.”