First Kiss (8 page)

Olivia bit back the smile. Her mother didn’t even realize she’d passed on a message.

He hadn’t run out on her in the middle of the night. He’d gone for breakfast, but had run into her mother. Even Cade knew that wasn’t a good sign.

Perhaps he had changed. She let the smile surface on her lips, but only momentarily. It had been a very long time since Olivia looked forward to seeing Cade again, and this time perhaps she wouldn’t let him only sleep.

Clearing her mind, Olivia poured the milk into the cup, tightened on the lid, and set it in front of Gage. He scooped it up and went about drinking it.

“I did arrange Austin’s funeral. There was no one around to do it.”

“What about that sister of his? Last I saw her she was in Vegas.” Which meant Celeste had been, too.

“You know, she’s gone.” Olivia thought better of it. “Or was. I think she was here long enough to empty the house of a few things while we were all at the funeral.”

Her mother gave her a slow nod. “So Cade just let you do all the work?”

She wasn’t going to sell Cade out, not at this point. “It was my pleasure to do it, Mom.”

“I’ll bet it was.” The words were said under her breath, but not completely hidden.

The vile taste of distain filled Olivia’s mouth. “So, how come you showed back up now?”

“A woman wants to see her grandson from time to time.” She brushed her hand over Gage’s head. “Why don’t you let me take him for the morning? I’ll go get him a donut or something sweet. That’s what Grandmas do, right?”

“Mom, he doesn’t need anything like that.”

“Well, it would give you a moment to get out of that nasty T-shirt and get a shower.”

Olivia let out a long breath. She wasn’t going to get into it with her own mother. But there was more, and it didn’t take rocket science to quickly figure out that her mother thought Olivia was going to get something out of Austin’s estate.

She lifted her coffee mug to her lips and looked at Gage. Olivia had everything she ever needed in life, and thanks to Austin, it was all securely hers. She didn’t need anything else. It was all Cade’s.

The coffee scorched her throat when she swallowed hard. Yep, it was all Cade’s, and he’d soon be throwing it all into boxes or dumpsters and heading back to his life in Wisconsin.

Chapter Seven

Olivia’s mood had quickly soured after her mother’s visit. The offer had been made, because that’s what good daughters do, for her to stay with them during her visit. But even Celeste knew it would be better to get a room in town. After all, Olivia was a bit too old fashioned when it came to her own mother bringing strangers home from the bar. Not that those words had been said aloud, but they both knew the implications.

Olivia shook her head as she washed down the kitchen table. That wasn’t fair. Perhaps her mother had changed. Then again, maybe she hadn’t.

She scrubbed harder as she thought that she missed Austin much more than she’d ever missed her mother. Celeste Baker never seemed to be quite far enough away, except when Olivia had moved back to Grand Junction before Gage was born. She had been quite surprised to find she was a grandmother, and Olivia had been just as surprised to find her mother had been in jail that whole time.

Her negative thoughts shifted when the phone rang. She reached for the receiver and answered it.

“I saw your mom’s car drive over the bridge. I figured it was safe to call.”

She had been so angry all morning, Olivia couldn’t have imagined that Cade’s voice on the other end of the phone would actually put her at ease.

She slid into one of the chairs at the table and relaxed. “I got your message.”

“Good. I didn’t want you to think I snuck away.”

She didn’t confirm that that had been a thought.

“I thought you’d like breakfast in bed,” he continued. “I figured when I ran into your mom at the store that she’d be headed your way. I thought she’d left town years ago.”

It surprised her that he knew that, but then again, when she’d left it was under the black cloud of scandal. Not that that was a new story in the life of Celeste Baker.

“She seems to have just shown up for the first time in months.”

“Hey, listen, I was thinking I owe you a couple meals.” Thank goodness he changed the subject. “Why don’t I burn some steaks on the grill for dinner? You and Gage come over and spend the night here.”

Olivia bit down on her bottom lip. That sure was a mixed invitation. “We would love to come for dinner, though burning steaks doesn’t sound like a cooking method.”

He laughed. “You haven’t seen me bar-b-que.”

“But, about the other part…”

“Olivia, I want to spend more time with you. With both of you. I’ve missed you, and I didn’t realize just how much.”

She couldn’t decide if that was reason to pursue the invitation—to find out what he meant—or reason enough to reject it. After all, after the age of twelve, Cade Carter had been nothing to her but a thorn in her side—and an unsatisfied ache in her heart.

“I can’t set Gage up like this.” The maternal instincts were ramped up now. “He can’t get used to you. You’re going to leave.”

“I’m in no hurry. In case you didn’t hear, I’m a washed up, injured football player. No one wants one of those.”

“Cade…”

“It’s okay. You nearly die on the field holding tight to that damn ball, and moments later, your career is over. They write you a check, tell you maybe they’ll consider you for a coaching position, and the next minute they’re having a press conference telling the world they just signed some new hot shot. It’s how the game is played.”

Though he was joking, she wondered how much pain there really was behind the words.

“What time would you like us there?”

“How about five?”

“We’ll see you then.”

“Olivia, plan to stay.”

The line went dead, but her heart kicked into gear. What was she getting herself into?

Cade watched Olivia and Gage unload from the car. It was a sight that had caught him off guard. A mother and her son. The glances. The touches. The smiles they exchanged. He didn’t remember his mother. He’d missed out on a lot, he saw that now.

He limped down the front steps to the car, and Gage reached for him. He took him from Olivia’s arms and held him against his chest.

“That looks like a diaper bag.” He nodded to the bag she pulled from the floor of the car. “When I said plan to stay, I meant pack a bag.”

“Cade, I can’t start up some affair with you just because you’re here. All of this is awkward. I think dinner is a good place to leave it.”

“I’m not trying to hurt you,” he found himself whispering as though someone else would hear. “C’mon, what happened between us that we can’t enjoy each other as adults?”

“Life happened. You haven’t really talked to me since the day you kissed me in the tree house.”

He smiled and touched her face. “My first kiss. Not one I’ve ever forgotten.”

She pursed her lips. “Cade, that was a different life. This one is more serious. I have him to think about. You have your life back in Green Bay. I’m not asking you to come home and take over your dad’s place.”

He knew she meant that figuratively and realistically. “It’s a good house. I could rent it out, or keep it to come back to.”

“When? When you needed someone? Not when they needed you?”

Whatever had happened to this woman after that kiss in the tree house, she had no intentions of trusting him or letting him into her life.

“You’re not even going to try to trust me, are you?”

“I haven’t had a lot of practice in trusting men. Or you.”

“Some of us change.”

“And some don’t.” She dropped the diaper bag back in the car. “This is a mistake, Cade.” She reached her arms out for Gage. “We should just go. You should finish fixing up the house, sell it, close out his accounts, and get back to your life. Gage and I need to…”

He couldn’t take anymore of her common sense. He moved in and planted a firm kiss on her lips.

She pulled back. “Not in front of him.” She glanced at Gage.

“He needs to know someone else thinks the world of you, too.” He looked at Gage. “I have something for you.”

He headed toward the garage with Gage still in his arms, and he could hear Olivia grunt as she reached back into the car for the diaper bag, slammed the car door shut, and followed them.

Cade opened the side door to the garage and set Gage on the floor in front of an old, antique pedal car. Immediately Gage hurried over to the toy and climbed in.

“Cade, that is wonderful. Where did you find it?”

“Dad had it buried in the back of the garage under a tarp with all of Conner’s things.”

The smile on her face diminished. “It was Conner’s?”

“Yeah, I’d forgotten all about it. I think he had it when he was Gage’s age. Seems like it broke when we were about five. His mom beat his ass for it.” The words had come out before the feelings hit him. The car broke because of him, not Conner. Conner had paid for that, and Cade had never told a soul.

He cleared his throat. “I fixed it up. It’s his now.”

“Oh, no.” She was quick to reject his gift. “He can’t have it. It’s not his.”

“I want him to have it. Dad would want him to have it.”

Olivia walked out of the garage. Again, he had her in tears. Most women would slap him across the face and leave him to move on to the next woman in line. This one was different.

“C’mon, big guy, let’s drive this on the driveway.”

He helped Gage out of the car and pushed it out in front of the garage. Olivia was on the back porch wiping her eyes.

Gage quickly figured out the pedals and was off, giggling and driving about. Cade slowly walked up the few steps to the back porch, watched Gage climb from the car and try to turn it around before getting back in, and then walked toward the grill and turned it on.

“Dad must have cooked out here not too long ago. The grill plate was clean, and the propane bottle was full.”

Olivia looked out over the driveway. “We celebrated his birthday. Sixty was certainly too young for him to die.”

“He’d turned sixty?” He closed the lid to the grill. “I don’t think I ever knew how old my dad was.” He sat down in the chair next to her, but she kept an eye on Gage. “I don’t think I knew much about him at all.”

“It’s not too late.”

He sat back in the chair and rubbed his knee. It ached as bad as his heart did. “I suppose I’ll know plenty when I start going through all the things here.”

“He had a full life before he settled here.”

“You’ve talked to him a lot about that, huh?”

“He’s all I had, Cade. I know that probably makes you mad, but…”

“No. Not mad. Sad that I wasn’t a good son. I always blamed him for that.”

Now she turned around and her eyes narrowed on him. “You blame him for your lack of compassion?”

She deserved to be angry. He was angry at himself, too. “I always did. I had it in my head that he drove my mother away. If a mother didn’t even want her son, the father must have been horrible.”

Olivia shook her head. “He loved her. She just couldn’t love him back.”

“So why have his son?”

He watched her take in a deep breath and then look out over the driveway at Gage. “He said she thought she could change.” She turned back to him. “She thought she could try to do the domestic life, small town, man at home and a baby. She was wrong.”

“Nice. You know more about my mother than I do.”

“I asked.”

Cade knew that was more than he’d ever done. He’d never asked where his mother was. He’d only accused his father of pushing her away. However, his father never argued that either.

“What about Gage’s dad? Did you love him?”

She looked down at her hands which were folded in her lap. “I thought so. He’d always been there when I needed someone.”

The subject caused her an enormous amount of pain and wasn’t very comfortable for him either. If he pursued the conversation, he just might find out that little boy he’d fallen in love with was his brother. He wasn’t ready for that. He wanted Olivia to himself.

“Conner was in the Army?” he asked, breaking the awkward silence that had developed.

“Marines.”

Cade nodded. “I found his duffle bag in the garage with the rest of his things.” He looked across the back yard at the burned out foundation of the house Conner had lived in. He took a breath and asked, “When did Conner die?”

Olivia lifted her head and looked at the house, too. “A few months after your accident.”

“He came to see me, didn’t he?”

She nodded. “You said you didn’t know him. You had security escort him from the hospital.”

At the very mention of the accident, his neck hurt, his head throbbed, and even more his heart ached. “I was on so many pain medications I didn’t know who I was. But, somewhere, I’ve always known he was there. I wish I could tell him I was sorry.”

Olivia only nodded her head and then turned her attention back to Gage. “Your dad was there, too.”

He reached his hand to her arm, and she turned back to him. “My dad? No one ever told me he was there.”

“He asked them not to. Someone named Ashley got him into your room so he could spend some time with you while you were sedated. He asked them not to tell you. He figured it would just upset you and set you back.”

Cade ran his hand over his head and let it sink in. Were there two more stubborn men in the world than him and his father?

He stood from his seat and headed into the house, without another word, to start dinner and get a grip on his emotions.

Olivia cried when he walked inside. There was so much Cade needed to know about his father. The man loved him. He just was a man and couldn’t show it. The only time he’d ever loved someone they’d left him so, of course, he was going to be afraid to show love, even to his son. But the truth was he was proud of Cade, and Cade needed to know that.

She watched Gage climb from the car and push it around. He was safe and content in Austin’s driveway for a moment. She stood and walked into the house.