Fireflies and Magnolias (28 page)

“Because I love her, all right?” he shouted back and then clenched his teeth tight.

So he’d been able to say it after all—just not to the woman who had the right to hear it first.

“You love her? Rye’s sister?”

“Stop calling her that. Her name is Amelia Ann, and yes, I love her.”

Her sudden smile caught his off guard. “Well, I’m glad you can admit it. I didn’t think you could feel otherwise about her given the situation.”

What was she talking about? “But you just said—”

She waved a hand. “I only said those things to rile you up. Give me some credit for knowing my own son.”

So, she had faith in him after all? It moved him something fierce to hear that. “I do love her. I don’t know what the hell to do about that, but I’m with her. I’d appreciate it if you’d just leave us to our own devices like Rye has agreed to do.”

“Rye can’t have agreed to that,” Mama said, settling back against the counter. “I know that boy as well as I know you.”

“He has agreed. Or at least he hasn’t taken a swing at me.”

Mama went over and poured herself a cup of coffee. “That’s more likely.”

The silence in the kitchen grew as she stirred in a spoonful of sugar.

“Clayton, I know you love her, but this can’t end well. Not between you and Rye and not between you and Amelia Ann. Rye won’t be able to handle the situation, and Amelia Ann is likely too young for you.”

He bit back a curse word. “Mama, I appreciate your thoughts. I do, but it’s my life.”

“I decided to retire, believing you were ready to take over as Rye’s manager. I thought y’all were both in good hands. If this breaks the two of you up, it will split my heart in two, Clayton.”

Dammit, were those tears in her eyes? He crossed the room to her, his eyes level on hers. “Rye and I won’t let anything come between us.” Since he’d first touched Amelia Ann, he’d been praying non-stop that what he’d always believed was true.

“I hope you’re right, but you know he adores his baby sister. You mess with that, you mess with everything.”

The thought of hurting Amelia Ann made him nauseous. “I don’t plan on hurting her.” Then he realized he needed to go a step further to convince her. “Mama. Do you remember how you told me to ask Daddy for a sign? Well, he’s given me one twice now about Amelia Ann.”

Was he really telling her this? But somehow it felt right to tell her. The words had been threatening to burst from his lips for days now, and the best person to hear them was his mama.

Her mouth parted, and then she snapped it shut, fighting deep emotion. “What was it?”

“Do you remember Daddy calling you his firefly?” he asked and felt his ears turn red.

Her hand pressed to her heart, and she nodded.

“Well, I’ve seen fireflies around her. I know it’s stupid, and dammit, I’m not completely convinced, but…”

“Oh, God,” she said in an agonized voice, and the eyes he knew so well squeezed shut, her lids fluttering with emotion. She took a deep, cleansing breath like she was fighting for control. And when she finally gazed at him, the tears she usually only shed at his daddy’s grave trickled down her face.

“Yet you told me…” she paused, dashing away the tears with her fingers. “It’s a sign, son.”

Hearing her say it, seeing her fall to pieces like this, had his own heart beating madly in his chest.

She took a fortifying drink of her coffee and then set her cup down with renewed purpose. “Do you plan on marrying her, Clayton?”

The counter bit into his back when he bumped into it. Jesus. Marriage? “We’ve only just become serious. Let’s leave that discussion for later.”

She set aside her cup and took his hands. “I know you’re not completely convinced your daddy gave you a sign, but I am. She’s the right one for you, and I’ll have to trust your daddy on that. Get to know her better.”

Get to know her better? What did Mama have in mind? Brunch?

His mind was reeling now, and his hands weren’t steady when he reached for his coffee cup, so he let them fall to his sides. “You’re getting way ahead of yourself.”

“I don’t think so. You’re going to have to step up to the plate and be a man if you’re going to keep Rye’s respect and your own. Be honest with him about how you feel. You, J.P., and Rye have been brothers since you first met up. Rye will come around once he knows how you feel about his sister, but you have to
tell
him. I know it’s hard for you to share your feelings.”

Tell Rye his feelings? He’d rather be gut shot. He wished the earth would crack and gobble him up right now.

“Your daddy was the same way, but don’t try and play the role of some dumb macho man, Clayton. Amelia Ann will need you to do your part to keep the peace in her family. Don’t let her down. Stop stewing, honey.” Mama kissed his cheek and picked up her coffee. “It will all work out. You have a powerful helper in your daddy, all the way from heaven.”

He didn’t even know how to respond to that.

But he did know one thing. The first person he had to share his feelings with was Amelia Ann. He thought of seeing her tonight, and it was like the rocks in his chest his mama’s talk had heaped on him dropped away.

Maybe telling Amelia Ann how he felt would be easy.

But Rye?

He didn’t know how he’d take the news, and his fears about their friendship and working relationship cast long shadows over him once again.

Selecting lingerie and a dress to wear for her date with Clayton made Amelia Ann feel like a seductress. The black lace bra and panties were lined with white satin. Pure sensuality. And concealing her ensemble was a stoplight red dress that clung to her curves—a little number she wouldn’t dare wear to work or school. To add to the tantalizing effect, she went with a smoky eye and neutral lipstick. She was just spritzing herself with her magnolia perfume when the doorbell rang.
He’s early
, she thought, having kept a careful eye on the clock.

How sweet.

When she opened the front door, she felt her mouth gaping open like the maw of a fresh-caught catfish. “Tammy!”

Her sister scanned her outfit and whistled, something she’d never heard her sister do before. “Well, looks like someone has a date.”

“Umm…” Had Rye told her? Was she a coward for wishing he had?

“I had to pick up some plants at one of the nurseries in town, so thought I’d see if I could catch you home,” her sister told her. “John Parker has the kids, but it looks like a quick dinner with you is out of the question.”

Amelia Ann scanned the street, feeling in her bones Clayton was going to show up any minute.

“You want me to go, don’t you?” her sister asked. “Since you haven’t told me about anyone, I assume this is a new relationship.”

That confirmed it. Rye had kept his mouth shut.

“No, come on in. Have a drink with me.” They were standing with the front door open like they had no manners at all.

Her sister came inside and shrugged out of her jacket as she followed her into the kitchen.

“Sweet tea?” she asked, opening the refrigerator.

“I’d love some. Do you have an orange?”

“Of course.” She poured her two glasses of tea and topped the glasses with orange slices, her sister’s favorite way to garnish it.

“Oh, this is divine. Now tell me about your date. You look fabulous. He must be pretty special.”

“He is. I’m seeing Clayton,” she told her sister and watched as Tammy’s eyes widened in shock.

“Clay-ton.
As in ‘Rye’s best friend and manager’ Clayton?”

Oh, why did she feel like a kid explaining herself in the principal’s office? “Yes. The very same. Rye is aware of this.”

“He is? And Clayton is still standing? Our brother sure has mellowed.”

“Clayton will be here soon, but we can talk for a bit. I have something else I wanted to share with you.”

Tammy glanced toward the door. “Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer for me to leave before he arrives? I don’t want things to be awkward.”

Now that made her laugh. “Of course it will be awkward.”

Even more so if Tammy knew she’d lost her virginity to Clayton last night and planned to have more wonderful sex with him after dinner. But that wasn’t something she felt comfortable telling her sister. No one had ever talked about sex growing up. It was like it didn’t exist. Until fifth grade, she’d honestly believed the storks had delivered them to the hospital like her mama had told her.

There were small traces of dirt on her sister’s T-shirt from the plants she must have been carrying earlier. Amelia Ann refrained from brushing it off. Her sister’s short blond hair was still perfectly curled around her face, however, and her makeup was brilliant. Those small stains were the only sign of what she’d been up to earlier.

“Does Daddy know?” Tammy asked. “John Parker mustn’t, or he would have told me.”

Which is why Clayton probably hadn’t shared it with his other best friend. She’d wondered about that. “Yes, Daddy knows, and he’s happy for me.”

“Well, I have to admit, I am pretty surprised,” her sister said as she sipped her sweet tea. “I thought you and Clayton…ah, weren’t that fond of each other.”

Given the way they bickered, her assessment wasn’t exactly surprising. “It was just…our way.”

“I see.”

The quiet that descended was already awkward, and she glanced over at the clock to see how much longer she had until Clayton arrived. Five minutes. Right now it felt like an eternity.

“It must be serious between the two of you given the…err…complications.”

Her throat went dry, and she took a healthy sip of her own tea before answering. Was Clayton as serious as she was? Probably not, but he cared for her. That she didn’t doubt. “Yes.”

“I know I’m no expert in these matters, but if you need someone to talk to…” Tammy said, clenching her glass so tightly Amelia Ann could see her knuckles.

Yeah, they’d never really talked about personal matters, and they both knew it was a gap in their relationship. The things that came normally to other sisters, people like Susannah, Sadie, and Shelby, just didn’t feel natural for them.

“Thank you. Now, about that other thing I wanted to tell you… I’m volunteering at a community legal clinic. While I work on other legal matters there as well, my focus is on domestic violence.”

The only sign of her sister’s discomfort was the way she fiddled with the orange slice on her glass. “I’m glad to hear that. It’s an important cause. Did this happen because of the concert?”

She felt the nervous urge to tap her foot on the kitchen tiles, but she resisted. “No, I was interested in this before. It’s…Tammy, it’s my life purpose. Like gardening is yours.”

When Tammy pressed her fingers to her temple, Amelia Ann knew she was struggling to control her emotions. “I’m glad for you, honey. I am.”

She waited for her sister to find the words she knew were coming.

“This whole concert idea has been pushing something inside me since you and Rye asked if I wanted to be involved. I’m ashamed to admit I’ve stuck my head in the sand. After I went to Meade and saw Sterling again…well, it was horrible to face him. I thought I was so brave to do that, but the thought of getting up in front of thousands of people at that concert and telling them my story makes me sweat.”

Setting her tea aside, she took Tammy’s as well and grabbed her sister’s hands. “You don’t have to do it. We only asked you because we wanted to give you the option.”

“I know, and I appreciate that. The truth is I
should
be able to share what happened. It saddened me to discover I’m not as brave as I thought.”

Amelia Ann couldn’t hear another word of this. She wrapped her sister up in her arms and rocked her. “Don’t you dare talk like that. You’re one of the bravest women I know.”

Her sister was shaking her head when she pushed back. “No, I’m not. Otherwise, I would have left him the first time he hit me. I need to forgive myself all the way, but every time I think I have, a new layer of shame pours down on me. This concert has exposed a whole heck of a lot of them.”

She saw that same shame on the faces of the women she worked with at the clinic, so she understood all too well. “You have nothing to be ashamed of, Tammy. And we didn’t do any of this to bring back your pain either.”

Tammy wiped away a lone tear trickling down her cheek. “I know you didn’t, sugar. And don’t take this the wrong way, but hearing about what you’re doing at the clinic only adds to my shame. I know you’re focusing on domestic violence because you feel like you didn’t help me and the kids.”

Her throat closed. They’d never spoken about it out loud. Not in all this time.

“I know you saw the bruises and didn’t believe all my excuses,” she whispered, putting her hand to her face like she was trying to hide a bruise. “Rye was away, so he didn’t know, but you did.”

A huge ball of hurt and anger rose up in Amelia Ann’s chest. “Tammy, I feel so guilty,” she whispered back. “I feel like I let you and the kids down.”

“Oh, honey,” her sister said in a hoarse voice, coming over and hugging her tight. “You couldn’t help because I didn’t say anything.”

“But I should have done something anyway…” Her voice broke.

“I wasn’t ready to be helped,” Tammy whispered, smoothing down her hair to comfort her—something she’d seen her sister do with Annabelle. “I’m sorry I hurt you.”

Hurt her? Oh, God, if her sister only knew what she’d done… Finally she couldn’t contain it any more. The truth bubbled out of her.

“Tammy, I was the one who called the tabloid and told them about your divorce.”

The gasp from her sister was the sound an animal would make if its foot got caught in a hunter’s trap. “You?” she asked, pushing back. “But why? Why would you do that? To me? To us? To my children?”

Tears rolled down her face. “I was afraid you’d go back to Sterling. I was so scared for y’all and…I thought if I shamed you and Sterling publicly, you couldn’t go back. So many women go back, Tammy. So many.”

The wobble in her sister’s lip broke her heart.

“You let us all think it was Mama. All this time it was you.”