Fire Spell (13 page)

“Did it come back in a flash, or a little bit at a time?” I didn’t have a chance last night to question him about all of the details.

“I guess it was a little bit at a time. Well, first the fishing trip memory was gone.”

I sat up. “What do you mean gone?”

“Someone at the office asked me if I was going on that annual trip this year, and I had no idea what he was talking about. I mentioned it to Ann, and she reminded me last year I went fishing. I checked my calendar, my computer for pictures, but there was nothing. I thought I was having early dementia or some kind of breakdown.”

I listened as he explained how the spell was lifted from his mind.

“Then, the next day I remembered the letter and you coming over to my house. The orb. I remembered that.” He stopped and looked at me. “And then the rest hit me. It was not a dream.” It was as if he needed to keep repeating it to reassure himself that there was reality hidden in the magic somewhere.

I placed my hand on his forearm. “It wasn’t a dream. I’m sorry I had Holly erase your memory, but I would do it again if I had to. Remembering those few days isn’t worth your life.”

“But it wasn’t your decision to make. You should have given me the option. It was up to me whether I wanted to keep those memories. You can’t get inside people’s heads like that.” He huffed.

I bit my bottom lip. “Technically, I’m not the one who got in your head.”

“You know what I mean. Your cousin. Whoever.” He jumped from the bed and paced.

“I get that this is all a big shock,
again,
but why are you so mad? I kept you alive for another year.” I didn’t want to say that I didn’t know how much longer I could do that without the
Eraser Spell
in play.

“I’m mad because of
us
. I lost an entire year of being with you.”

“What?” I didn’t have words. I had mourned my relationship with Jack. I had cried, eaten tubs of ice cream, gotten back together with my ex, started dating a movie star, and worked out until I collapsed—I had tried to move past any hope of “us” during the past year. It never occurred to me what would happen with all those feelings he had for me since we met. It wasn’t as if the spell erased what he already felt.

“The things I said to you in Vegas were real. I fell for you the day you came in for our first meeting. All year it has accelerated beyond any normal speed. I shouldn’t feel this way about someone I work with. I know that. But now, I think I understand why. When we got together in Vegas, I actually let myself believe we were meant to be, and it was only a matter of time before the rest of our lives started.” He rubbed his eye with the heel of his hand. “I know it was only three days, but those three days opened up something in me that I had fought for two years. Then to find out you took it from me? I don’t even know what to say anymore.” He reached for his jacket and headed toward the door.

I stood from the bed, realizing my shirt was practically see-through. “Where are you going?”

“I need some space to think.” He pulled on the handle.

“You can’t leave. It’s not safe anymore.” I tried to think of a way to keep him from leaving.

“Why don’t you do some little witchy spell and stop me?” He slammed the door behind him.

Shit. Jack was gone.

T
HINK
, I
VY
, think
. I debated whether I should chase him down the hall. Jack wasn’t the kind of man who liked to be told what to do, and he liked it even less that I had taken him out of the decision-making process. It didn’t matter. He was alive, and I wasn’t going to doubt that I made the right decision. If I had asked him in Vegas if he wanted his memory erased so he could stay safe, he would have said no. He would have taken his chances, unaware of how dangerous the situation really was. I made the right choice. The problem right now was that I had no idea how dangerous it was for him in Charleston.

He was already mad at me; I might as well rack up some more irritant points.

“Glamour.” I pointed at my reflection in the mirror. I needed a quick wardrobe change if I was going to catch up to him. I brushed the glitter off my jacket and jeans. I liked these boots I had packed and hoped I could run in them if I needed to.

I picked up my leather bag and dashed out of the door. The elevator was excruciatingly slow as I watched the numbers light up on the top. It was stupid of me to let him out of my sight.

Once I hit the lower level, I jogged out of the elevator and scanned the guests gathered in the lobby. I hoped he hadn’t left the hotel yet. I raced to the revolving door, just in time to see him walking toward the harbor.

I followed him, careful not to get too close. He needed to blow off some steam. Maybe by the time he walked a few blocks, he would feel better. I always loved how tall Jack was, but I especially appreciated it this morning. There was no way I’d lose him in the city.

Things had gone all wrong last night and this morning. He had tried to talk to me about his feelings, and all I could do was pry into his memory issues. I had probably made him feel terrible.

He stopped in front of the water and sat on a bench, sipping a cup of coffee. I surveyed the area, looking for anyone who had his or her eyes on him.

I walked toward the bench and sat next to him. “Hey.”

He stared straight ahead. “Hey.”

“I know you’re mad. I get that.” I watched a tugboat push a barge out of the harbor. It was funny that something so small could have the strength to move something so large. I looked at Jack and giggled.

“What’s funny now?” He turned to look at me.

“I guess we’re kind of like that tugboat and barge. I’m the tugboat, kind of like your bodyguard.”

“I don’t need a bodyguard, dammit.”

Maybe that wasn’t the best analogy to use. “Jack, I wish I could undo everything that has happened to you, but I can’t. All I can do is try to keep you alive. Please let me do that until we figure out what is going on.” I reached for his hand. “You would do the same thing if the roles were reversed. You would take my memory if it meant keeping me alive.” I squinted at him through the sun.

He shifted in his seat. “Maybe.” I saw him crack a smile. “Ok, of course I would. I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”

“Then, please, stop being pissed at me,” I begged.

He turned to face me. “I can’t help feeling we missed our chance,” he whispered, and then his mouth descended on mine, before I could protest.

His lips moved against mine, and I tried to make sense of the kiss. Jack was an amazing kisser. He gave the kind of kisses that made me drunk and took days to recover from. I had dreamed of it and cried over it until I finally gave up on it. This one felt hungry, as if he was trying to tell me something.

He broke free and I struggled to breathe again. “Ivy, I don’t want to forget this.” He rested his forehead against mine. “Don’t take it from me.”

“I won’t,” I whispered in his ear as he held me against his chest.

The wind whipped off the water, and for a moment, I felt clear. Being in Jack’s arms seemed to steady me again, but the pangs of guilt were strong. It wasn’t the clearness that Jack would want. I knew then that he was right. Our chance had passed. The problem was, how was I going to tell him?

We walked back to the hotel. With his memories restored, Jack acted as if he had a new perspective on life. He told me he didn’t want to waste moments or hold back on his decisions. He was gung-ho on living
carpe diem
style. I wondered what that might mean where I was concerned.

I was on high alert, always worried someone was going to show up and snatch Jack. It was highly unlikely something magical would happen in broad daylight on the downtown streets of Charleston, but I wasn’t sure what our enemy was capable of doing. Holly texted she and Ian were on their way. We had a few hours to kill before they arrived. I debated whether to start a conversation with Jack about my revelation on the bench.

He was sexy, athletic, intelligent, strong, and a master of words and his tongue. He was the man I had crushed on for years. Had I really made this kind of decision in the middle of a magical crisis?

We walked through the hotel lobby, straight to the elevators. I opened the door to the room, and as soon as I turned to close it, Jack picked me up and hitched my legs around his waist. His mouth collided with mine, pressing deep with desperate kisses. He shoved the dresser lamp to the floor, and the shade rolled to the side as he deposited me on the wooden surface. I felt the wall slam into my back. Every move he made took me off guard, and as soon as I grabbed hold of a rational thought to talk him down, he surprised me with something else that shot heat through my body.

This must be what he meant by
carpe diem
. He tugged on the zipper to my boots and tossed them across the room.

He kissed my neck, sucking and licking like he would devour me right there on the dresser. He pulled me against his waist again and carried me across the room, dropping me in the center of the king-size bed.

All the alarms in my head started buzzing. No matter how much I would enjoy sex with him, I knew we couldn’t cross that line. It wouldn’t be a casual hook-up. How could it after the past three years? If I slept with him, I’d be saying that I was his—that I could give myself to him. No matter what I tried to tell myself or how amazing he felt, it wasn’t our time. I didn’t belong to Jack. I never did.

He took my face in his hands and crashed his lips against mine. I felt the urgency claiming him. He was passion and heat. Every time he touched me, it was as if flames blazed from his fingertips.

I had to stop him. I had to tell him.

“Ivy, I think I’ve fallen so in love with you, I don’t know what’s right and wrong anymore. I don’t know what’s up or down. Being with you is the only thing that makes sense.”

I stared at the ceiling. His words caught me off guard. I reminded myself I had been stronger than this before. I had defeated a Proxy and taken down an immortal evil. If I could do those life-altering things, I could tell this man we were over before we ever began.

The lines around his eyes softened. “Do you know how good it feels to finally tell you all of that? I don’t have to pretend.”

Each time he smiled or laughed, my heart shattered a little more. The words were precious and genuine, how could I do this?