Fire of Stars and Dragons (6 page)

Dante’s expression turns puzzled. “I’m sorry? I do not understand. Have I offended you in some manner?”

Refilling my glass, I gulp down half before answering. “Look, I don’t know what you were thinking getting in the middle of this whole thing between the king and Theo, but don’t feel like you have to save me or something. As interesting as you may think I am, there’s no reason for you to be stuck with a wife just because… because… Hell, I don’t even know why you did it, why you offered to marry me. Just know I’m not holding you to it.”

So much for giving him a fair chance. Instead, I’m giving him a way out. I polish off the wine in my glass and turn back to see his face, surprised how stricken he looks. “You do not wish me to court you, to desire your affections,” he states, not bothering to ask, as if he’s sure of the answer.

“I didn’t say that.” Maybe I don’t know what I’m trying to say. Maybe I’m afraid I
will
feel something for him, something too real, and it’s better for him to walk away if he’s doing this for the wrong reasons. “If you prefer to be alone, I’m not going to demand you change.”

The security of devout loyalty is always better than the pain of romantic heartbreak, or so I’m telling myself as Dante’s eyes meet mine. Blue eyes. Bluer than the sky or the Atlantic. Eyes to lose yourself in. And I swallow my heart before choking on the idea Theo could be right.

“ ‘There are days when solitude is a heady wine that intoxicates you with freedom, others when it is a bitter tonic.’ A quote from a French novelist, Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette.” The demigod keeps his gaze steady on mine.

Breathe.

A fair chance. I promised a fair chance, a simple thing.

“She was quite correct.” He steps toward me, blue eyes intensifying, the lights flickering then dimming, making his eyes appear to glow. I set my glass down as he comes close.

A reasonable opportunity. Not an unreasonable thing to ask. Not with Dante. He’s so…

His fingers caress my chin, lifting it, enticing electricity humming through those fingers, and he leans over, running his tongue along my lips, deliberate and sensual, before kissing me. “ ‘Your lips are like wine, and I want to get drunk,’ ” he whispers, his breath candy-sweet.

“Shakespeare,” I reply. He nods, his hair brushing my forehead as he pulls me in, lips as soft and sweet as his breath, and intent on getting impressively tipsy.

Chapter 4

*Theo*

“And what had he to say regarding the matter?”

“You know Agtos, Oliver.… ‘You are limited by your own limitations’ were his exact words.” With the GoSky on speakerphone, I keep my hands busy working on an origami dragon, rounding out the dozen cranes and three Kawasaki roses I made while speaking with Agtos. I need to buy more paper, having used most of the supply in my desk already. “Must he always explain everything in such riddles?”

“
Don’t you do the same to your wards, Theo?
”
he remarks, and I hear the smirk in his tone.

“As you are so fond of saying, life is not fair. That’s my way of balancing the fairness somewhat. If I must tolerate his riddles, they must tolerate mine.” Making an error on the dragon’s head, I toss the paper in the rubbish bin, starting over with a fresh sheet. “I’ve told you before, I think he creates those little inserts for Chinese fortune cookies in his spare time.”

“You’re a smart ass, brother.”

I laugh. “And you’re just an ass. Speaking of asses, how is your ward? Does he plan to visit mine tonight? Should I sharpen my sword, or did you have a chat with the Notorious P.I.G?”

“Am I supposed to understand that reference?”

“Not unless you’ve begun listening to music from the last few centuries without mentioning it, Oliver.” I suppress the urge to laugh loudly at the thought, while concentrating on the folds necessary for the dragon’s head.

“Then why do you insist on making such references?”
he growls. I do laugh. His growl lowers to an irritated rumble.

“Because I find your refusal to stay attuned to popular culture entertaining when it leaves you at a loss, my dear brother.” My dragon’s head is perfect this time, and I search through the paper for a sheet to make another rose; a blue one to match the color on Cait’s toes. “Is Corrin aware I will not accept disingenuous intentions toward Cait? She deserves such effort.”

“I have explained this to him, whether he heeds your warning remains to be seen. Corrin has little time left, and Miss Hayden is an ideal match, an excellent choice to be queen.” He sighs, undoubtedly at wit’s end with the young king. “Speak forthright, Theo. Do you truly see it necessary she falls in love with her suitor, or do you want them to fail, leaving her turning to you?”

I stop mid-fold, unsure how to answer, unsure I can, unsure I want to. “Perhaps both. Cait made me promise to try, Oliver. I promised to try falling in love with her, not simply love her as a dragon would any female ward, but to give her the romantic love she desires of me should I be her choice.”

“She made you? You’re a dragon. There is nothing she can make you do that you do not want to do, Theo. You’ve told me that countless times. Although I cannot imagine the complexities of a female ward, I do not believe Agtos was quite so baffling in his statement.”

Returning to folding the rose, I nod, though I know he cannot see me. “Yes. I did say this would be an experience full of firsts; however, perhaps my limitation is not my inability, but rather the fear that she deserves more… or that I deserve less, and giving her my best will not be enough.”

“Reasonable fears, yet what do you believe she deserves? My ward whom you despise?” His tone bears an icy edge.

“No. I should not say anyhow. Given her destiny and Dante’s involvement, nature’s course may sway her path despite what I…” The sound of glass breaking interrupts me. “Oliver, I must go.” Without further explanation, I end the call and go out the office door, moving down the darkened hallway in silence.

Cait’s giggling and Dante’s low voice stop me, a faint glow appearing in the direction of their voices in the kitchen. Not wanting to disrupt them, I step toward the wall, out of sight. “That was amazing… and convenient. I hate cleaning.” I can hear the smile in her voice. “You should have caught it before it hit the floor though.” She giggles again.

“If I were not entirely distracted, I would have, though were I not distracted, bottles would not be falling on the floor in the first place.” Dante’s tone is light and amused, far removed from the typical serious nature of his demeanor. “Perhaps this is not the best setting to continue such decadent indulgences.”

I dare a glimpse around the corner, needing to know Cait is safe, to confirm it was a mere accident and nothing worrisome. She takes a sip of wine, a half smile playing at her full pink lips, tainted darker by the Chilean Malbec. Her free hand runs up his chest as she steps closer, and Dante takes her glass, setting it on the counter. The lights throughout the apartment flicker before falling dim as the color in his eyes blazes.

She tilts her head back, wanting him, waiting, expecting his lips to meet hers, but I turn away when he leans toward her. The second he takes a breath, I catch the scent in the air of that unmistakable sweetness.

Swift, silent, I escape to my room, closing the door behind me without the faintest noise, then lean against it, shutting my eyes though unable to shut out the sight.

I do not know what I believed. Perhaps foolishly, I entertained the notion Cait wanted me just as I feel so entirely drawn to want her. For all the millennia I lived knowing better, too easily the idea of love seemed within the realm of possibilities. She asked me to promise, to try for her, to love her.

And I did, though for what, I am at a loss to understand. I hold no fear Corrin will win her heart; however, my judgment seems rather misguided in the realm of Cait’s heart. Never did I consider Dante would see her as more than a mere fascination; that he would fall for her, stumble beyond intrigue and into the unfamiliar territory of love, and yet I cannot deny the evidence.

Ambrosia. The sweet scent of a deity falling in love.… And the destiny within Cait responds.

A shiver runs through me at the thought. I called him and asked him to come meet my first human ward, my first female ward. I brought this on myself, though my greatest mistake is quite obvious: believing for even a single moment I am any different from my brothers. Feeling the familiar burning, I pull off my t-shirt, having gotten comfortable before making my calls, preferring to relax at home in worn jeans and nothing on my feet (far more natural) and go to the private balcony doors, swinging them wide.

The sky is a moonlit speckled blanket covering the lights of the city as I jump onto the railing with the balance and reflexes of a dragon. A dragon: it is what I am and I must not forget that, must not allow myself to entertain ideas that Cait will see me as more, would truly want me as a man, or could ever love me. Looking down to the street thirty-two stories below, the burn deepens in my back and along my shoulder blades, the shimmering of the shift beginning, and I will it to come.

The wind blows my hair around my face as my chest muscles constrict in response to the partial shift, my human form reacting to the unfurling dragon wings at my back of the deepest emerald green as they spread out beyond the length of the wide balcony. Stretching my arms out, I stand tall above the city, using my wings to counter me from falling over the edge.

But I know a part of me has gone over the edge, seeing Cait with Dante, and knowing she is with him at this moment.

This is what I am, who I am, with the wings only a small part of my natural form, free of such emotional ties, frightening and dangerous to all who bring darkness into the world, and destined to go on for eternity… but not destined for Cait.

Cait deserves something more than a dragon. I love her because love makes me more beholden to protect her by honor, a code of chivalry far older the human concepts of nobility and gallantry. The honor of the House of Pendragon is unquestionable. However great my honor may be, a dragon does not deserve the love of a woman such as Cait. I should have seen this was best. A husband from the High Realm suits her station, and Dante is most acceptable.

Letting my head fall back, I stare up at the sky. I cannot lose her to Dante. She was never mine, never more than my ward. What I want does not matter. I must allow her free will.

To each our own destiny.

“Holy… What the
baz
are you doing, you crazy dragon?”

Caught unexpectedly by Cait, I pull my wings in close, willing the shift to shimmer them away as I spin around, still balanced on the railing. Despite cursing at me in Penfaeryn and calling me names, she’s devouring every inch of me with her eyes when I face her. I wear only a smirk and a pair of faded blue jeans. She may fall in love with Dante, but I will not fail to appreciate what attention she gives me.

Her face flushes. I would like to think it is in reaction to me, though I saw the three empty wine bottles in the kitchen. She opens her mouth, closing it again without speaking, hiding her face in her hands then dropping them to her sides and shaking her head.

“What are you doing, Theo?” Cait’s tone cuts the silence with a sharp-edged blade.

I run both hands over my hair, not wanting to be honest, but unable to lie outright to my ward. Glancing at the city lights, I take a deep breath. “I needed a bit of space and fresh air, a new perspective.” That isn’t untrue. There is not enough room in the apartment for Dante kissing Cait and me knowing it to be in the same vicinity.

She nods. “Oh, is that so? And do you typically get fresh air while half-naked and acting like some suicidal gargoyle on the edge of the balcony?” Cait walks over to the railing, looking down at the street below. “You should get down. You’re worrying me.”

“You should not worry for me, Cait. I’m no gargoyle,” I reply, laughing quietly at her odd behaviors. I find her constant unexpectedness enthralling. “I am a dragon, Cait.” Something I must keep reminding myself. How I love her is not how she deserves. “Even should I fall, I can shift to full dragon form in an instant. I have no fear of hitting the sidewalk given I have wings.”

“I would love to fly,” she comments in a whisper, staring into the endless night sky.

There are many things I want to say, things I should not. “Did you come looking for me for something?”

“Yep.”

She does not elaborate, and I have a feeling I’m receiving some form of retribution for my abrupt, frustrating responses that angered her earlier. “Must I guess your reason, or would you be so kind as to reveal it?”

A broad smile spreads across her face, and I desire to kiss those lips, melt away thoughts of Dante, burn myself into her memory, her dreams, her fantasies. “Dante went to pick up Thai food. After a few drinks, I told him I didn’t feel like going anywhere. Anyway, I was wondering what Sir Oliver said about the king. Should I be expecting him tonight?”

Once again, she asks a question begging an answer I do not wish to explain. “I must call my brother again. We were interrupted during our conversation before I determined that particular information.”

“Good, then you have a reason to get down from there.” Cait grins up at me.

Laughing, I retrieve my GoSky from my pocket. “Not necessarily so.”

She scowls. “Damn you, Theo. Get your ass down here, now.” Her voice cracks while attempting to sound demanding.

I jump down, landing solidly on my feet in front of her. “There. Are you happy?” She throws her arms around me with near desperation. “Cait, what is wrong?” An errant thought leads me to wrap her in my arms as well, holding her tight. “Did Dante do something to hurt you?” I could never forgive myself for being so selfish, leaving her alone with him while caught up in my own concerns, leaving her unattended with a man simply because I believed him trustworthy.