Fire Down Below (24 page)

I have the perfect
dress
for my party. I found it in a small boutique in Fremont when I was doing some
hardcore shopping one Saturday. The material is mostly silk and it’s a
beautiful sapphire blue with black trim around the edges.

My Jane Moon earrings look
fabulous with it and I sigh regretfully as I lay a hand over my empty
décolletage. The happy news is that the dress is a size four and it fits me
like it was made for my body. All those mornings of drinking swamp juice and
working out with Ben and the Sisters Grim have really paid off. I’m pretty darn
skinny. I was even able to zip up a size two, but it was very tight, as in I
wouldn’t be able to eat, drink, or sit down, tight. Not much fun in that.

I miss junk food though and working
out so hard every morning is exhausting.  This is definitely not a natural
weight for me, since I don’t think something natural would require so much work
to maintain.

Ben has been pleased though. Every
time we get naked together he’s inspecting me, commenting on my new slenderness
and how much he likes it. It’s nice to feel so desirable, though between staying
skinny, hairless, and well groomed, it’s like another full time job.

Ben gives me a wolf whistle when
he arrives to pick me up.

“Wow, you look hot...very hot.”

“Thank you,” I say, smiling and
batting my eyelashes. He tries to run his hands down my hips, but I slide out
of his grasp. I’ve spent the last two hours getting ready and there’s no way
I’m letting him muss me. “Don’t even think about it.”

“I can
think
about it.”

“Yeah, but that’s all you’re going
to do.”

“I can’t wait to see what you have
on underneath this dress.” He reaches out for me and doesn’t let me get away
this time. “How about a sneak preview?”

“No!” I slap his hands as he tries
to peak down the front.

He laughs. “All right, come on
let’s go.”

***

Deep down I have this terrible
fear that no one is going to show up for my birthday. I know it’s one of those
irrational fears everyone has on occasions like this, but nevertheless I’m
relieved when we arrive at the restaurant and plenty of people are already there.

One of the first people I see is my
friend Anthony, who I’ve known since my twenties. We used to work together at Cafe
Nin, slinging espresso when we were both struggling artists. He was one of the
friends I partied with every weekend back then. When I went away to college in
New York, he and his partner Thomas opened an art gallery in downtown Seattle.
It’s a small space, but they’ve done well. He’s the friend I told Declan about
who says he’d love to show a collection of my paintings, claiming I was always
the one with the “real” talent. It’s an incredible offer, which I know I should
take advantage of. We haven’t seen each other in a while and after hugging me
and wishing me a happy birthday, his eyes pop out when he spots Ben.

“It’s Ranger Rex!”

I glance uneasily over at Ben who,
luckily, is talking to a waiter and didn’t hear Anthony’s comment.

“I know you’re dating him again,”
he said. “But I had to see it to believe it!”

I’d told Anthony about Ben in a
recent email. They met once years ago during a single ill-fated evening where I
took Ben out clubbing with a group of my friends. It wound up being a disaster
as Ben spent the entire night with a disapproving scowl on his face. To be fair
the whole club scene was not something Ben would ever enjoy and I should have
known better. I guess I was hoping he’d loosen up and have some fun. For some
reason Anthony got it into his head that night to call Ben, Ranger Rex. I can’t
remember how it even started. We were all drinking and acting pretty silly, except
for Ben, of course, and Anthony was teasing him a little, but Ben took it the
wrong way and wound up leaving in a huff.  

“I can hardly believe it myself,”
I say. “But we’ve been going out for a while now.”

He gives Ben a once over. “Uh huh. I
hope you know what you’re doing, girl. That man may be gorgeous, but he’s high
maintenance.”

“Ben’s really mellowed.”

“Kate,” Ben says coming up to me, annoyed.
“I thought you said they had a coat check service here.”

“They do, don’t they?”

“Not according to that waiter. I
wouldn’t have worn my wool coat if I’d known that.”

Anthony’s raises an eyebrow and I
can sense the glance in my direction. Ben notices him and is obviously trying
to place him.

“Have we met?” Ben finally asks.

“This is my friend Anthony. Don’t
you remember that night we went out dancing years ago?”

Ben nods, but it’s clear he doesn’t
remember what I’m talking about, which I realize is for the best.

Anthony looks at me and is obviously
thinking the same thing. He announces he’s going to get a drink from the bar
and leans in to kiss me on the cheek. “Let’s catch up more later,” he says
quietly.

I continue to do the rounds with everyone
wishing me a happy birthday. There are a few other people I haven’t seen in a
while and I chat with them a bit, letting them know how happy I am that they
were able to make it. I introduce Ben to people and, even though I know I
shouldn’t feel this way, I’m glad to have a man by my side. I might be turning
thirty-five, but at least I’m not alone. By the time I make my way over to
Declan, Ben is involved in an avid conversation with one of my co-workers about
their recent trip to the Alps, so I figure I’ll introduce the two of them
later.

Declan gives me a hug. “You look
beautiful tonight. I can’t take my eyes off of you.”

“Thanks,” I say, flustered. “You
certainly know how to pay a girl a compliment.”

He smiles. “It’s the truth. And
did I also mention that you look
very
young for your age?”

“No, not that—please!”

“Okay.” He shrugs. “You’re an old
hag.”

“Whew, thank you.”

Suzy comes over and hands me a
glass of wine, telling me it’s my duty to drink since she’s not allowed to. She’s
starting to show a bit from her pregnancy, though it’s only noticeable to those
of us who know her. I’ve had friends who are totally bloated and get acne
during their pregnancies, but Suzy appears to be one of the lucky ones because
I’ve never seen her look better. She’s in the pink of health and even the
whites of her eyes are glowing. I ask her if she’s heard from Lauren yet, since
she went to pick up the desserts for the party.

“Lauren just called and said she should
be here in a few minutes. I guess there’s an event going on at Seattle Center
and the traffic is really backed up.”

“Oh, here’s my cousin Paul,”
Declan says, motioning to a tall rangy guy dressed in a white shirt and black
blazer walking towards us. “Let me introduce you guys.”

One look at him and my mouth falls
open in shock. He has dark hair, dark eyes, pale skin, and he looks
exactly
like John Cusack. It’s crazy. They could be twins. I’ve never seen someone
resemble a movie star so close in real life and I feel disoriented as if I’m
looking at the real thing. When he’s finally standing in front of us and Declan
makes the introductions, both Suzy and I are staring at him with such amazement
you’d think he was the eighth wonder of the world. I know we’re both thinking
the same thing—Lauren is going to freak. We all shake hands and say hello. Paul
thanks me for allowing him to come along with Declan to my birthday.

“Of course,” I say. “I’m glad you
could come. You know, you look just like John Cusack.”

He grins. “I hear it all the time.”

“I don’t know about that,” Suzy
say, looking him up and down with approval. “I think you’re even better looking.”

“It’s true.” I nod in agreement.

Declan laughs. “All right, let’s
not
exaggerate
. His head is swollen enough as it is. His family will
never forgive me if I allow the situation to get worse.”

Paul punches him playfully in the
arm. “Don’t listen to him. He’s only jealous because I’ve still got hair.”

Declan scoffs. “Like I give a
shite.”

“You’re married?” I ask, disappointed.

“No, I’m not married,” Paul says,
taking a sip from his glass of whiskey.  

“You’re single then?” Suzy asks
hopefully. “No girlfriend?”

“I’m a free agent, as they say.
Why do you ask?”

Before Suzy can reply, her phone buzzes.
“It’s Lauren,” she says glancing at the caller before answering. From what I
can gather Lauren is out in the parking lot and needs help carrying all the
desserts inside.

“I’ll help,” Declan offers.

Luke has come over and is standing
beside Suzy, asking her if everything’s okay. I’d seen him talking to Nina earlier
and had said a brief hello to both of them. He’s dressed in a dark blue suit
that, knowing Suzy, is probably Armani or Yves Saint-Laurent. I’m ashamed to
admit that I feel a pang of jealousy when I see the way he looks at her. It’s
obvious that he’s deeply in love. Has a man ever looked at me like that, I
wonder? The sad truth is I can’t remember anyone who ever has. Not even Ben.

“Everything’s fine,” Suzy says. “Would
you two mind going out and helping Lauren carry everything inside? She’s parked
out front in a white Acura. I’m going to go get someone from the kitchen staff
to help too. I’ll meet you out there.”

The three of them leave together
and I stay and talk to Paul a bit more. It turns out he teaches economics at
Trinity College in Dublin and is on a short sabbatical. As he tells me about some
of the local tourist sites he’s visited so far, I notice he’s distracted by
something at the side kitchen door. I look over to find that he’s staring at
Lauren as she walks into the dining room alongside Suzy and Declan.

I wave to her and when she comes
over we give each other a big hug.

“Happy Birthday!” she tells me.
“I’m glad I finally made it through all the traffic. Talk about crazy! There
were two stalled cars and then apparently one of the tow trucks broke down too,
so they had to call in a second tow… truck….” She suddenly notices Paul
standing beside me. For a long moment neither of them speaks. They stare at each
other and I have this odd sensation that I’m witnessing something important.
I’m about to introduce Paul to Lauren, when he puts his hand out to her.

“I’m Paul.”

“Lauren,” she says softly, taking
his hand.

I glance over at Suzy who grins at
me with raised eyebrows. When I look at Declan he’s not smiling at all, but is studying
me.

I don’t have much time to think
about it though because I notice my parents have arrived. I go over and give
them a big hug, taking them around the room and introducing them to everyone. When
I glance back at Declan he’s still watching me and when I smile at him this
time he smiles back.

The wine is flowing and everyone
is in great spirits as one of the waiters comes over and tells us they’re ready
to serve appetizers. They bring out large platters of baked brie, crusty bread,
along with some spinach and mushroom quiches. There’s plenty of food and
everybody digs in.

At some point Nina, Suzy’s older sister
comes over and wishes me a happy birthday. I haven’t seen her in a while and
she’s as gorgeous as I remember. Straight blonde hair with porcelain skin and a
mouth full of perfect white teeth. She’s one of those people who look glamorous
even if she’s wearing sweat pants, no make-up, and has her hair pulled back in
a ponytail. In fact, I’ve seen her like that and she looks amazing. If I woke
her up in the middle of the night and shined a flashlight in her exhausted face
she’d still look amazing.

I feel Ben staring at her as she
takes the chair next to me and I can hardly blame him. I don’t even feel jealous.
I’m sure if I were a guy I’d be staring too. What’s funny is, according to
Suzy, she doesn’t date much. Apparently she’s picky about men and is so busy
with work that it doesn’t leave her much time for a social life. We talk a bit
about Suzy’s pregnancy and upcoming nuptials. Nina’s phone chirps twice during
our conversation. She shakes her head smiling at whatever text she’s reading.

“So, I wanted to ask you
something.” She leans in close, enveloping me in an expensive perfume that
reminds me of jasmine tea. “Who is that guy you were speaking with earlier?”

“Which one?”

“Over there in the dark suit. He’s
bald, very handsome.”

“Declan?” I glance at him. He’s
talking to my mom. She’s laughing at something he just said.

Nina nods. “Yes, that’s him. How
well do you know him?”

“He’s one of my best friends.”

“Is he?” She looks at me in
surprise. “Could you introduce me?

“Sure...,” I say, a strange
prickle of worry developing in my stomach. “Why do you want to meet him?”

“I recognize him. There was an
article about him and his business partner in the Seattle Times recently. He’s
from Ireland, right?”

I relax a little, realizing she’s
just interested in Declan because of work. “Yeah, he’s Irish. Sure, I can
introduce you if you want me to.”

“His company is doing really well
for a start-up. They’ve been getting quite a bit of notice. What’s he like as a
person?”

“He’s a great guy. Declan is
totally down to earth.”

“Is he single?”

“Yes,” I nod, swallowing a bite of
quiche. “He’s single.”

“He’s quite attractive.” She winks
at me conspiratorially. “What kind of women does he usually go for?”

“Oh...all kinds, I guess.” I stare
at Nina’s perfect face and I have this sudden desire to stick my fork in her
eye. Which is absurd. Why shouldn’t she be interested in Declan? To be honest Declan
would probably like her too. He likes smart women. Unlike some men, I’ve
noticed he’s not intimidated by a woman who has a good mind. And Nina is
certainly bright. Though I have to admit the thought of them going out together
is making me nauseous. But then I remember that Declan likes brunettes. I don’t
think I’ve seen him date a blonde the whole time I’ve known him, so he probably
wouldn’t be interested in her after all.

I let my breath out in relief. Don’t
get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t want Declan to meet someone nice and be
happy, because of course I do. It’s just that Nina is not the right woman for
him.