Fire and Ice (6 page)

“I’m sure you and your mother can purchase cloth enough to make you a couple of gowns.”

“No, sire.  It embarrasses me to say, but we don’t have any coin of our own.  You own everything here now and it isn’t for me to use your money.”

“So, you want my money now!
” he said deliberately misunderstanding her. “I’ve never paid women for anything, Juliana.  I’ve coin enough for myself but it was hard fought for.  I risked my life for what I have and don’t intend to give it to dressmakers and such.  No, use what you have already.  Enough of this women’s talk - speak to your mother.”

Juliana was now doubly embarrassed but also angry at his assumption that she was trying to wheedle money out of him.  “I have no intention of asking you for your hard-earned coin and if you offered it I would refuse.  You owe me nothing and as I’m neither your wife nor your mistress you have no need to feel obligated.”

She turned on her heels and left slamming the door behind her.

Ulfric
was struck dumb by his own stupidity and looked out of the window, resting his head on the cold stone lintel.  What was wrong with him?  Why was he picking fault with her every word?  Was it because of what Thorvald had told him about her warming to him?  Was he deliberately pushing her away? 

A movement caught his eye and he watched as Juliana went into the woods opposite
the Hall.  She had her cloak with her and he surmised she was going to the beck.  In a second he had made up his mind and ran down the stairs to try and catch her and to explain his feelings towards her.  He had no idea what he would say but his heart was hammering when he arrived at the beck.  She was sitting with her back towards a tree, leaning on the broad trunk with her knees drawn up, casually throwing small stones into the water.  She was looking wistfully out over the water and he stood for a moment watching her, wishing now that he had not come.  She turned, suddenly aware of his presence and stared back at him with anger in her eyes.

“If you’ve come to accuse me of something else, Ulfric, then go away.  I’ve had enough of you and your moods today.  Leave me alone.”

“Juliana,” he began.  “I have come to beg forgiveness for my hurtful words.  I wish I could call them back but I know I cannot.  I didn’t mean the things I said, I’m just so ... I don’t know.”

“Well if you don’t know, sire, I don’t know that I can help you,” she snapped, unwilling to forgive him so easily.

“Will you allow me to sit by you, Juliana?”

She looked again into his
grey-blue eyes and mimicked his earlier words, “This land is all yours, you can do as you like with it - and the people who live here.”

He
recognised his own words being thrown back at him and was not encouraged but he went to sit by her anyway hoping he could redeem himself in some way. Taking her hand he lifted it to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss on her fingers.  She was shocked at the spark which ignited her insides at his touch and felt her body start to shake.

“Don’t be afraid, Juliana.  I mean you no
harm, but I would like to sit with you awhile instead of you hurrying away from my sight.”

Juliana’s
nerves were so on edge when she was close to this man that she felt like running away.  She had never felt like this with Erik or with any other man she had known, but knew that there was a dangerous attraction between Ulfric and herself.  It was almost tangible and that frightened her.  But how could she explain why she kept her distance without encouraging his attentions further? 

She was so aware of his presence that her ears were ringing and her mind could not concentrate on his words. 
She was surprised he could not hear her heart beating against her ribcage.  He still held her hand and lifted it once more to his lips but she pulled it away, causing his eyes to change to that cold steel grey she had seen so many times in his anger.

“Why do you hate me so much, Juliana?  What have I done to you that you should reject me so?”

“I... I do not
hate
you sire, but I will never forgive the Normans for their callous and cruel treatment of my father.  I loved him and my brother so much, and my father in particular was taken from us in such a cowardly and dishonourable way.” 

Ulfric watched as tears began to fall onto her pale cheeks and it took him all his effort not to pull her into his embrace and whisper words of love in her ear.  He wanted so much to comfort her and tell her that he would look after her forever, but old habits die hard and he still did not trust women, especially soft, beautiful women who cried out their heartbreak.  Instead he said, “Juliana, I am not a Norman and I certainly did not kill your father.  As for your brother, he died an honourable death in battle and you should be proud of him.”

“Proud!  You think I should be proud of Aldred?  Who are you to tell me who to be proud of?  I loved my brother but where does pride get you when you’re lying dead on a battlefield and your loved ones are grieving?  Nowhere, absolutely nowhere!  Don’t tell me how to mourn my family – I’ll do as I please.  As for your attempts at seduction – well, I’ve never given you any encouragement in that direction or sought your attentions.  My mother and father taught me to expect marriage from a man, not whoredom!”

With those words
ringing in his ears she rose to her feet and gave Ulfric a look of pure contempt before turning her back on him and blindly running further into the woods.  Ulfric sat still and wondered what had happened in those short moments to turn Juliana into an angry ball of fire.  He shook his head once again at his utter lack of tact and leaned back against the recently vacated tree.  He could have sworn she was softening to him when he kissed her fingers.  He had felt the energy flow between them, seen the spark in her eyes and felt her tremble at his touch.  Could it be she was afraid of him?  Perhaps Thorvald was wrong in his assumption and it was fear that showed in her eyes and not the attraction he had hoped for.

He sat for
a long while trying to work out how things always went wrong for him when it came to Juliana.  He was so engrossed in his musings that he did not notice the darkening sky, or the wind beginning to pick up.  The previous summer days had been too perfect and now a downpour was about to happen and Juliana had run off.  He presumed she had gone back to the Hall by another route and decided to seek shelter himself until the rain finished.  Thunder began to rumble and lightning flashed as he entered the Hall and looked around, only to see de Gant asleep at the table and the servants busy with their work.  Hilde was supervising the cooking of a pig hanging on a large spit over the fire.  The young boy who was turning the beast looked over as he approached warning Hilde of Ulfric’s presence.

“My lady, Hilde,” he said to get her attention.  “Is your daughter in the Hall? 

Hilde dropped a curtsey, “I haven’t seen her, my lord, but she may be in your chamber.”

Thorvald entered at that moment and brushed the rain from his tunic.

“The thunder is unsettling the horses, Ulfric, but I’ve managed to settle them for now.”

“Good,” was his curt reply and he flew up the stairs to find Juliana and hope she had recovered her good temper.  He opened their chamber door but one glance was enough to inform him that she was not there.  He searched her mother’s room too but there was no sign of her.  He leaned on the window ledge and looked out through the rain for any glimpse of her but again there was no sign.
  He went to the big bed and lay down thinking of shining red hair framing a beautiful face and bright green eyes flecked with orange which sparked red when angry.  His tiredness caught up with him and he fell asleep amid the thunder claps and lightning forks hoping Juliana would return soon.

***

Juliana was deep in the woods when the thunder and lightning began.  The canopy of foliage from the trees helped shelter her from the downpour but as it became harder and the thunder grew louder she crouched down and looked for shelter somewhere else.  There was a tree nearby which offered some cover as, unlike the others, it had a hollow trunk just big enough for her to crawl into and wait until the storm passed praying that the lightning would not strike.  She hoped there would not be any woodland creatures seeking the same security as she squeezed into her temporary shelter.

After some jiggling and wriggling she managed to find a comfortable spot and relaxed.  Thankfully the tree was not hollow all the way up and she looked out onto the woodland and as usual despite the rain and thunder it calmed her mood.  Immediately, thoughts of Ulfric suffused her imagination and she wondered if he would come looking for her
, and then decided that he would not after their latest argument.  She wondered why they could never have a real conversation without it always turning into misunderstandings and hurt feelings.  She tried to think rationally about why she always felt uncomfortable with him when they were alone and then had to admit to herself that she was nervous around him because she was attracted to him.  If she let herself go to him then her reputation would be sullied and she would never find a husband from the nobility, she would always be thought of as Ulfric’s mistress, and any ensuing children would be illegitimate.  That was not the life she had planned for herself.  She would have married Erik and been happy if only Ulfric had not entered her life so dramatically, and she wondered why she could so easily dismiss her feelings for him.  Tears began to roll down her cheeks as she realised that she liked Ulfric more than any man she had ever known.  He had made her want him without even trying, but it was useless because all he needed was a mistress and had no interest in marriage.  She had to give him credit for not forcing himself on her since he had arrived, when men like de Gant would have taken her forcibly.  It was true that any other woman would have considered it a privilege to sleep with the new lord of the manor and she had noticed some of the younger servants looking at him coyly from under their lashes when they served him food.  How would she feel if he took one of these girls to his bed?  She felt sick at the thought.

Taking a deep breath she realised that in order to keep Ulfric happy she would have to give in but she would fight him for her honour at every opportunity.  She would give in to his demands she knew that
, but he would know that it was with reluctance on her part and she would not give herself fully until he married her.  That was her plan - but how she would resist him until then she did not know.

***

Ulfric heard the door open and was on his feet with his sword drawn in a split second.  He saw Juliana was wet through and shivering
although whether through fright or fear he could not tell. Was it cold she felt in her body or fear she was going to be cut down?

“My lord, please, put down your sword.  I am wet and cold from the storm and I need to change my clothes
,” she said through chattering teeth.

Ulfric put his sword
down at the side of the bed and went to call the servants to bring hot water for their mistress to wash but changed his mind and went in search of his men.  Within half an hour he had returned but by this time she had dried herself as best she could. Her teeth were still chattering even though she had wrapped herself in her cloak.  Ulfric began dragging a large keg which had been split lengthways down the middle into the centre of the room.  He then instructed the servants to bring as much hot water as possible and fill the keg in order that Juliana could bathe. 

She laughed when she saw how it rocked from side to side but he was not to be outdone and pushed the chest to one side and a large bench to the other to stop it moving.  He then left her
and went down to the Hall below finding Hilde stitching in front of the fire.

“Hilde,
please see to your daughter before she catches her death of cold.”

Hilde flew up the stairs and entered the bedchamber and helped Juliana to step into the hot water.  She lowered herself into the make-shift bath and laughed.

“This is marvellous, mother.  I love this contraption Ulfric has made for me.  You must try it.”

“No, daughter, I will wait and see how you are afterwards.  Shall I bring you some soap?”

“Oh, luxury – yes please!”

Juliana soaped herself
all over and Hilde washed her hair for her, shouting to the servants to bring fresh water and leave it outside the door. Afterwards, Juliana felt refreshed and cleaner than she had for a long time and vowed that she would use the bathing keg again.  Hilde left her alone wrapped in animal furs and she began to drag her fingers through her hair to dry it, thinking how thoughtful Ulfric had been to think of such a wonderful thing. 

A knock on the door brought her back from her musings and she open
ed it to find the servants waiting to empty the bath.  They filled buckets and then dragged the keg away out of the room.  Ulfric walked in when they had finished, anxiously looking to see if she had stopped shivering.

***

Juliana looked so relaxed when she smiled and held out her hand to him to sit beside her both of which he took to be a sign of encouragement. 

“Did you enjoy your hot water bathe, Juliana?” he asked.  “It must have been
better than diving into a cold beck.”