Finding You (By You #3) (3 page)

"I bet you're one of those girls that thinks she's doing a lot worse than she is. I bet you don't have any lower than an 'A' in any of your classes."

Sarah gave him a serious look and shook her head. "I mean, I might have been like that in high school, but..." She let out a frustrated sigh. "It's been a rough semester so far."

Jeremy leaned in closer, studying her with those intent eyes. She felt like he was looking right through her, reading her mind. There was a buzzing in her chest that got even stronger with each passing second.

"Did something happen?" he asked.

Her voice caught in her throat as she looked at him. She bit her lip. Well, there's no point in keeping it from him. It's not like you have anything to hide. But even so, telling him about Huck felt like she was lowering one of her defenses. She felt like she could be as flirty as she wanted if he thought she was unavailable, but once he knew the truth she was going to have to be careful. She wasn't going to let herself get hurt again, not like last time.

"It's just...Huck and I kind of broke up."

Now it was Jeremy's turn to give her a wide-eyed stare--apparently she wasn't the only one caught off guard. He leaned back in his seat, his eyes still searching her, that buzzing in her chest still gripping her.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said, his voice sincere. "Tell me what happened."

Jeremy stared at Sarah blankly, unable to form any words for a while. His head was reeling from what she's just told him. Or, had it been because of the way she looked at him?

They broke up? She's single?

His brain raced to make sure he was hearing things correctly, that he wasn't just hearing what he wanted to hear.

"I'm sorry to hear that," he said, even though he wasn't sorry--not even a little bit. "Tell me what happened."

Sarah gave him a nervous look, and didn't say anything for a few seconds while she considered him. Why was she so impossible to read? They'd been together for a long time, hadn't they? Was she upset that they broke up? What had gone wrong?

The questions swirled around in his head, and he had to force himself calm them down so he could actually listen to what the girl had to say.

"Apparently I wasn't good enough for him, so he decided to go and find someone else" she said, finally. Her face scrunched into a look of disgust. Her eyes were turning red, and she ducked her head away from him for a moment. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to be a mess."

"You don't have any reason to be sorry," he said. It pained him to see her hurting like that, and that pain quickly turned into anger that someone could make her feel that way. "He doesn't deserve any of your tears."

She gave him a sad look. "It's just...I never thought he could do something like that to me. We grew up together. You don't do things like that to someone you've been friends with your whole life."

"What did he do?" he asked. He didn't want to press her too much, but there were a million questions swirling around in his head.
 

Sarah's mouth opened, and then closed again. There was something she wanted to say, but she was struggling with it. Jeremy wondered when the last time he'd seen someone in so much pain.

"He slept with someone else," she said. Her eyes were fixed at a spot on the table. "He got pissed that I wouldn't have sex with him, and he fucked someone else--some girl he didn't even know."

Jeremy flinched, taken off guard by the animosity in her voice. He had never seen a girl as upset as what he was seeing right then. But she set her jaw and looked up at him, coolly. There was strength behind those eyes--strength that seemed to overpower the hurt in her voice. She wiped away the single tear that had fallen down her cheek.

"You're right, though," she began. "He doesn't deserve any of my tears."

Jeremy reached out and took her by the hand, not even thinking before he did it. He wrapped his hand around hers, giving her hand a light squeeze as he did.
 

"I wish I were the kind of guy that knew all the right things to say," he said, giving her a serious look. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. I'm sorry he did that to you."

"That's funny. I was thinking that you always seem to know the
exact
thing to say."

Jeremy felt himself melting under her look, as though her eyes could strip him bare and see him for everything he was. A part of him hoped that wasn't true--the part of him that wasn't happy with who he was. It was the part of him that had warned him to stay away from her in the first place. But how was he supposed to do that? She was the most captivating thing he'd ever seen.

Just then, Sarah turned her attention to something outside the window. Her eyes went wide and she let out an excited gasp. When Jeremy turned to look at whatever she'd seen, he saw two police officers mounted on the backs of a couple Percherons. They were trotting down the street outside with content smiles on their faces. The smile on Sarah's face grew even wider as she watched them.

"Aren't they beautiful?" she said, all traces of the sadness in her voice were gone.

"You like horses?"

She nodded her head quickly. "I think they're wonderful. I just watching how they walk, and how they run. They're just so...majestic."

He couldn't help but smile at the excitement in her eye as she talked about them. He was no stranger to horses, but it had been a long time since he'd spent much time around them.

"Have you ever gone riding?" he asked, and the smile on her face diminished some.

"No, but I really want to. My family knows a few horse owners in Green Falls but I've never had the opportunity."

"Well, you should do that when you're back home, sometime. Would be a shame to miss out on that kind of opportunity."

She considered it for a second, and nodded. "You're right. I don't know why I haven't tried it before. I guess I'm just nervous that I won't be any good at it."

Jeremy squeezed her hand, again, and said, "Things are always scariest just before you do them."

The look she gave him was enough to send his heart racing. Enough to make him forget all of his previous doubts and reservations.
 

"I have an idea," he said, out of nowhere. Sarah's eyes perked up even more. "My buddy is in a frat and they're throwing a party tonight. You should come and hang out. Maybe it will help get your mind off things."

What was he doing? Was he crazy?
 

Sarah tilted her head, her eyes intent and curious. She considered him for a long moment before she said anything. Finally, she shook her head.

"I don't know. I've never been to a frat party--I don't know if they're quite my thing."

"Me neither, actually," he confessed. "Oz has been trying to get me to go to one all semester and I keep turning him down. But maybe if we were to go together..." He shrugged a shoulder. "It would just be nice to have someone else there that I knew. Another friendly face."

He was almost certain he'd overstepped himself when she didn't say anything for a while. But at least she hadn't turned him down, outright. Silence hung in the air for so long that he was about to tell her it was no big deal, that she shouldn't worry about it, when the corners of her lips turned into a little smile and she nodded.

"That does sound like it could be fun," she said. "Can I bring my friend Reagan? I don't think she'd like me going off to my first party without her."

Jeremy's mouth spread into the biggest smile he'd ever had.

"Of course, bring whomever you want," he said. "I'm sure they won't mind having more girls show up."

Sarah beamed a smile at let out a laugh. It was the most beautiful thing he'd heard all afternoon, and it was almost enough to distract him from the nagging sensation that was now tugging at the back of his mind.

What in the world had he just gotten himself into?

* * * * *

Jeremy zoomed through the streets of West Village as fast as his bike would take him. His mind was racing while he ducked between cars and pedestrians alike, drawing more than a few honks and shouts. He shouted apologies, but he didn't slow down. He didn't have any time to waste.

Pulling up to a red light, Jeremy pulled out his phone and plugged in his ear buds. After punching a few buttons, a ringing noise echoed in his ears, and he waited for his friend to answer on the other end of the line. Thankfully, he didn't have to wait long.

"Jeremy, my friend, how are you doing?"

The booming voice of one of his only friends boomed when it answered. Jeremy and Oz had gone to high school together--what felt like a lifetime ago. But they'd lost touch around graduation, and Jeremy hadn't even known that the big man had gone off to Franklin University. It had been a surprise to run into him on campus at the beginning of the semester.

"I'm in a bit of a jam and need your help," Jeremy said.

"Oh? Well, tell me what it is--Oz can help you out."

"I sure hope so," he said. Jeremy pushed off and pedaled across the street when the light turned green. "So, you remember that party you invited me to last week?"

"Ah, yes, and a party it was! You missed a wonderful time--women, booze, and craziness. The campus police even showed up, but they let us off with a warning."

"Well, here's the thing..." Jeremy started. He couldn't believe he'd even gotten himself into this situation. All he knew was that he wanted to see Sarah again, wanted to spend time with her. But he didn't want to make it awkward, he didn't want it to be a big deal, or anything. After all, she'd just broken up with her boyfriend. She probably would have turned him down if he asked her on a real date. "...I kinda need you to throw another one--tonight."

There was a silence on the other end of the line for what felt like an eternity. Jeremy cursed himself again for inviting Sarah to a party that didn't even exist. How was it going to look if he had to go back and tell her that the whole thing had been a ploy just to see her? She was going to think he was some kind of crazy stalker or something.

"My friend, I do not think this is possible," Oz said, finally. "Like I said, campus police showed up and gave us a warning, last time. I do not think my brothers will be so interested in testing their luck again so soon."

Jeremy let out a groan.

"You gotta figure something out," he pleaded. "I'm desperate here--I kinda made a promise to someone and it's going to look really bad if I have to back out on it."

"This someone wouldn't be a girl, would it?"

He hesitated for a second, then said, "Yes. It's a girl I met a few weeks ago."

Oz belted out a loud laugh that echoed through the phone. "Ah, the things we do for women. This girl, you're trying to impress her?"

A hint of frustration swirled through him. Oz's questions were harmless, but he couldn't help but imagine there was something more to them. But Oz was the closest thing Jeremy had to a best friend, and there was no point in shying away from the truth.

"She had a boyfriend," he began, trying to explain. "But he cheated on her, and now she's single. I thought it would be nice to show her a good time--you know, in a casual way."

A strong laugh erupted from the other end of the line again, and Jeremy felt his cheeks flush with heat. There was no reason to give him a hard time. So he was no good at this whole
girl thing
, not everyone could be as naturally charming as Oz.

"You are too funny, my friend," Oz bellowed. "You should ask her out for a drink--they like it when you are straight forward."

"Well, what's done is done. Can you help me or not?" Jeremy asked, his tone sharper than he intended.

There was another silence on the other end of the line and he imagined Oz trying to contain another fit of laughter. Jeremy knew he sounded desperate--but what choice did he have? He'd backed himself into a wall, and he knew if he went to Sarah and told her the truth it would ruin everything.

"Of course I will help you, my friend," Oz said, at last. "I will need some time to smooth it over with my brothers, though."

Jeremy cringed.

"I told her the party is tonight, so I hope a few hours is enough time."

Oz let out a groan, but said, "Don't you worry about a thing, I will make it work. You start figuring out how you're going to impress this girl."

"Thanks, Oz. You're really saving my ass here--I owe you one."

"What are friends for, Jeremy? You would do the same for me."

Jeremy thanked him again before ending the call. What Oz had said stuck with him for a long time that afternoon. There had been a time when Jeremy had been convinced he
would
have done anything for the man, but then things had changed--
Jeremy
had changed. He promised himself to never let that happen again. He was older, wiser. And if he didn't learn from the mistakes of his past, if he didn't learn how to let them go, then how was he ever going to be able to give himself to someone else again?

Sarah raced straight home from the coffee shop, checking the time the whole way. Why had she agreed to a party
tonight
? How was she ever going to get ready in time?

Oh, but he had looked so sweet when he asked about Huck. And when he held her hand...

Get a hold of yourself, you have a lot to do!

She made a mental checklist of everything she needed to do before the party. And the first thing on that checklist was to track down Reagan and talk her into going to the party with her. She hoped that wouldn't be too difficult.

But when she got back to the dorms, Reagan was nowhere to be found. She must have gone off to class, or something, so Sarah had to settle for leaving her a text message telling her to come over right away.

Back in her room, Sarah started pouring through her clothes to find something to wear. What was a girl supposed to wear to a frat party? She wanted Jeremy to notice her, but she didn't want to come across as slutty.

Wanted him to notice her?

She really was losing her mind. It's not like it was a date or anything. They were just going to a party together, and Reagan was going to come with them--Sarah hoped, anyway.