Finding Serenity (Serenity Beach) (6 page)

“Hey, lovers. There’s plenty of time for sex later. Your presence is requested.” Boomer stood in the doorway holding a beer in each hand and wearing a knowing grin.

Nolan’s hand slipped away and he sat up. “Yeah, alright. Just give us a minute.”

“I’ll give you five. That’s all you should need.” He winked and disappeared in a flash.

I felt like I should compose myself and get dressed before leaving the room, but I couldn’t find my cover-up. Nolan noticed my failed searching and pulled off his t-shirt and handed it to me. “It’s better than nothing,” he said apologetically.

“It’s perfect.” I slipped it on, relishing that it smelled like him. The shirt came down to mid-thigh, just long enough to cover my bottom.

Nolan retrieved his hat from where he had hung it on the doorknob. He pulled it low on his head, shielding his eyes. “Let’s do this.”

The party had been moved inside while we were in the bedroom. Most people were gathered around a large poker table, wagering with articles of clothing. More than a handful of them were completely naked and had clearly already run out of bargaining chips, so to speak. I tried not to make eye contact with anyone, but I was pretty sure one of them was Brian.

“We can go back to the bedroom,” Nolan said when he saw the look of discomfort on my face.

“Meyers! Why are you avoiding your friends?” Snyder staggered across the room, clearly drunk. “Are you too good for us now?”

“Relax, Snyder.” Nolan’s jaw clenched. “You want to hang out, let’s hang out.”

He led Snyder over to one of the couches and they sat down. They talked quietly, but intensely. It was clear that whatever was bothering Snyder wasn’t going to be handled anytime soon. Something Nolan said must’ve helped because they both relaxed slightly and Snyder even laughed.

“It’s good to see them get along for once,” Boomer said in my ear, making me jump. For such a big guy, he was pretty stealthy.

“But they’re friends. Why shouldn’t they get along?” Nolan had never said anything negative about Snyder to me.

“It’s like this. Two friends both get drafted to play professional baseball. One of them makes it to the pros where he is insanely successful before nearly getting killed by a line drive. The other friend busts his ass in the minors, fighting to get called up. Then one day he blows out his knee and is told he’ll never play again.”

I frowned. “Well that’s a shitty story, but what does that have to do with them getting along?”

“Because Nolan recovered. He could play again if he wanted to. Snyder can barely walk without his knee giving out.” Boomer checked to make sure I was keeping up. “You can see how he might be resentful that his best friend is choosing not to return to the game.”

“What the hell do you want from me?” Nolan barked from across the room.

They had both gotten to their feet.

“I want you to stop being such a coward,” Snyder yelled back.

“I’m the coward?” Nolan laughed humorlessly. “At least I don’t drown my sorrows in alcohol and drugs.”

“You’re an asshole, Meyers.” Snyder’s hands clenched into fists. “You don’t deserve any of the success you’ve had.”

“What the hell did I ever do to you?” Nolan demanded, eyes blazing.

“You gave up.” Snyder said the words without hatred, his voice full of hurt.

Nolan had heard enough. He stormed from the room, punching the wall on the way out.

It took several seconds, but eventually people began to talk and move. Not me. I was frozen, still in shock. Finally, Kennedy nudged me and said, “You should go find him.”

She was right. Nolan was hurting and there was a good chance he needed a friend right now.

I found him outside, alone. He was at the edge of the boat, as far away from the party as possible without getting in the water. I wasn’t sure he knew I was there until he said, “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry for what?” I wasn’t sure what I had expected him to say to me, but I definitely hadn’t expected an apology.

“I’m sorry I lost my temper and stormed out.”

His back was still to me, so I couldn’t see his face but I detected the hurt in his voice. I walked across the deck and hugged him hard from behind, spontaneously and without any thought as to whether it was the right move. I must have guessed right, because he turned in my arms and wrapped me in a legitimate hug.

I held him tight around the waist, my head resting on his chest. I could feel his heart pounding, but it gradually slowed. After several minutes of silence, Nolan let go. We both stood at the railing, looking out at the dark water and night sky.

“He was right.”

“Snyder?”

“Yeah.” Nolan exhaled loudly. “I gave up.”

I reached for his hand. He was gripping the rail tightly and my fingers brushed over his knuckles which were already beginning to bruise from when he had punched the wall.

“You’re here, aren’t you? I’d say that means you didn’t give up,” I said.

Nolan moved behind me, his arms wrapping me in a tight embrace. His chin rested on the top of my head and his breath moved my hair when he said, “I went through the therapy. The doctors said I fully recovered. But every time I step onto the field, something inside me locks up. After a couple of games where I broke down in panic attacks, I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

“Your shoulder injury?” I asked softly, already knowing the answer.

“My shoulder is fine.” His voice was so quiet I could barely hear it over the lapping waves. “It was just an excuse.”

“You almost died, Nolan,” I said emphatically. “It’s okay to be affected by that.”

Nolan went quiet, lost in this thoughts. As bothered as I was about how Nolan was feeling, I couldn’t help but enjoy being held by him. It had been so long since anyone had held me this way- tenderly and with no ulterior motives. Actually, I wasn’t sure anyone had ever held me this way.

“You’re not like anyone I know,” Nolan said. “You don’t care about my money, or the fame. You don’t look at me and assume I’m an asshole or a womanizer. You accept me for who I am, and you give me more credit than I deserve.”

“You’re not the only one that is trying to escape their past, Nolan.”

“What could you possibly have done that you need to escape?” Nolan held me even closer.

“I trusted the wrong person.” I hadn’t told anyone the real reason why I came to Serenity. Not even Kennedy knew the story of my past.

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

“Not right now.” I didn’t want to dredge up those painful memories right now, not when I was so close to letting them go. I just wanted to be with Nolan and enjoy this moment.

“Okay.” He didn’t sound annoyed or disappointed. “When you are ready to talk about, I’ll be ready to listen.”

“Thank you.” I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against his chest. “You’re not like anyone I know either, Nolan Meyers.”

My head moved up instinctively, meeting Nolan halfway in a passionate kiss. I started to turn around, but he held me in place, staying directly behind me. I sucked in a breath as his hand moved beneath the hem of the t-shirt I was wearing. His hand slid beneath the fabric, running over the smooth skin of my stomach. I could hear the sound of footsteps getting close and Nolan pulled away. I adjusted my t-shirt, smoothing it back into place just as Kennedy arrived on the deck.

“It’s Snyder,” she said, her face twisted in dismay. “Something is wrong. He is unconscious and won’t wake up.”

By the time we got back inside, the boat was already headed toward shore. We pushed our way into the bathroom where Snyder was passed out on the floor.

“What happened?” Nolan demanded, falling to his knees at the side of his friend.

“I don’t know!” Kennedy’s friend, Cassidy, was crying, holding Snyder’s head in her lap. “He was gone a long time, so I went looking for him. When I found him, he was already unconscious. He’s not responding to anything.”

“Did he take something?”

“Take something? Like what?” Cassidy looked around helplessly.

Nolan reached into Snyder’s pocket, retrieving a plastic bag filled with pills. “Damn it, Snyder.”

Someone had called ahead and an ambulance was waiting for us when we docked. The EMTs hurried to get Snyder on the stretcher.

“I’m going to ride with Snyder to the hospital,” Nolan said as they loaded him into the ambulance. “Are you okay to get home?”

“Yeah. Do you want me to come to the hospital? I can put on some real clothes and meet you there.” I pulled off his t-shirt and handed it to him.

“No, that’s okay. I’ll call you with an update once I know something,” he said distractedly as he pulled the shirt over his head.

I watched the ambulance pull away and felt very alone and helpless. Suddenly, I was overwhelmed with the desire to go home.

“Let’s get out of here,” I told Kennedy.

Brian had passed out pretty early in the afternoon and had managed to sleep through everything. I was relieved to discover he hadn’t been one of the naked poker players. He was completely confused about what had happened, but he was also completely sober and could drive us home. We filled him in on the details as he drove.

“Enough drama for one night,” Kennedy declared once Brian was caught up. “Jordyn, tell us the truth. How amazing was the sex?”

“Sorry to disappoint, but there was no sex.”

Kennedy and Brian both booed loudly. “I didn’t know you were such a prude,” Brian said.

“Nolan’s a good guy,” I said quietly.

“Oh my god. You are so in love with him.” Kennedy’s mouth dropped open. “You just met this guy and you’re already smitten.”

“What? No.” I glared at her. “I’m not smitten.”

“Please. Look at that stupid smile on your face.” She mocked me with a goofy grin.

“Turn around.” I tried to look annoyed, but I couldn’t get rid of the smile. I was worried about Snyder, but anytime I thought about Nolan, the smile returned. I was doomed.

After a long shower, I sat outside to let the evening heat dry my hair. My phone buzzed with a new text message and I jumped to grab it, assuming it would be an update from Nolan. Instead, it was an unknown number, and the text simply said,
Hey Jor
. I replied by asking who it was, but they never responded.

Shrugging off the mystery text, I proceeded to settle in for the night. I kept my phone close to me all night, waiting for Nolan to call with an update, but the phone never rang. I dozed off and on but failed to get any decent sleep. Around five in the morning, I gave up completely. I got dressed and headed to the hospital. Serenity had a tiny medical facility and security was lax. Following the helpful signs, I found the waiting room.

Nolan was spread out on an old, uncomfortable looking chair. His head rested against the wall and his eyes were closed but I could tell he wasn’t sleeping. When he heard me approaching, his eyes opened slowly.

“Hey.” He started to get up but I motioned for him to stay seated. It was obvious that he was exhausted. “What are you doing here?”

I curled up on the seat next to him and leaned my head on his shoulder when his arm went around me. “You didn’t call. I was worried.”

“I assumed you would be asleep and I didn’t want to wake you.” His body relaxed against mine. “You don’t know how nice it is to hold you right now.”

“Hold away. I’m not going anywhere.” I lifted my head just long enough to kiss his cheek. “How’s Snyder?”

“The doctor says he should be okay. He mixed a healthy assortment of pills and they had to pump his stomach, but he got lucky.” His hand found the ends of my hair and he twirled a strand slowly.

“Has he done something like this before?”

Nolan sighed. “No, but he hasn’t been himself since the injury. I knew he was taking a lot of pain killers for his knee, but I never thought something like this was going to happen.”

“How are you holding up? You look tired.”

“I’m wiped,” he admitted. “The doctor said I should be able to see Snyder soon. Once I see for myself that he’s okay, I plan to go home and pass out.”

“So we need something interesting to keep us occupied while we wait.” I leaned forward and reached for the newspaper on the coffee table. I flipped through the pages until I found the entertainment section. “One down- another word for hot? Five letters… maybe spicy?”

“Your idea of an interesting time is a crossword puzzle?” Nolan shook his head in wonder. “I had no idea you were such a dork.”

“Oh, I’m way dorkier than this. You’ll see.”

He kissed me on the nose and said, “Another word for hot… I’m going with Jordyn.”

“Cute. But clearly wrong.” I filled in the boxes with the word spicy. “This is going to take a while if you’re going to try to be cute with every answer.”

“Five letter word for cute- Nolan.”

“Okay, now who’s the dork?” I elbowed him playfully in the ribs. “You’re not as cute as you think you are.”

“Yes, I am,” he said with complete confidence. “I was voted cutest male athlete in a recent poll.”

“Well, there’s a reason why we require people to be older than 18 to vote in elections that actually matter. Pubescent girls aren’t exactly known for logical thinking.”

“Ouch.” He put a hand on his chest. “Good thing we’re in a hospital, because you just broke my heart.”

I was smiling when the doctor came in and my good mood instantly vanished. His update for Snyder wasn’t great, but it also wasn’t terrible. They had stabilized him and he should recover fine, but tests had found a lot of drugs in his system. He was going to need treatment after he got released.

Nolan was able to see Snyder, and afterward he was quiet and withdrawn. He kept his arm around me as we headed to the exit, but I could feel the distance between us.

“Snyder will be okay,” I said, even though I knew that might not be true. It was just what you said in situations like this.

“Snyder doesn’t believe in rehab. Or therapy. Getting him to admit he needs help will be next to impossible.”

Nolan was about to open the glass door that led outside but he stopped abruptly.

“What’s wrong? Did you forget something?”

“No.” He turned around. “You should go back inside.”

“Nolan. What’s going on?” I had never seen him look so angry. One quick step to the side allowed me to see around him. Nearly a dozen reporters were gathered in the parking lot.

“Someone leaked this to the press,” he said. “They aren’t going to leave without a shot of me coming out.”

“Okay.” I nodded, knowing that he was right. Getting pictures of Nolan looking upset as he left Snyder’s bedside was exactly what they wanted. “We should get this over with before more of them show up.”

“You don’t get it, Jordyn. This isn’t your life. But trust me when I say that you don’t want to walk out there with me. You’ll become part of the story, and there’s no going back after that.” His eyes were pleading me to agree with him.

He was right. I didn’t want that kind of attention. “Come with me. I know a different exit we can take.”

Right after moving to Serenity, I cut my hand while cutting open a pineapple at work. Danny had brought me here to get it stitched up and they had been fixing the automatic doors out front. We had entered through a side door. That same side door led out to the back of the parking lot.

“Nice work, Lewis,” he said.

Since I had walked to the hospital, Nolan drove me home. I gave him directions for the long way, with lots of turns, so we could make sure we weren’t being followed. By the time he walked me to the door, he looked like he was about ready to collapse.

“Maybe you should just crash here,” I suggested, worried that he wouldn’t stay awake long enough to drive back to the estate.

“That is a very tempting offer, but if I step through that doorway, sleep will be the last thing on my mind.” Nolan’s mischievous look was very hard for me to ignore. When he looked at me like that, I wanted to jump his bones.

“Point taken. Text me when you get there so I know you made it home safely.” I pulled him close for a long hug, one that was practically impossible to end.

He kissed me goodbye, lingering longer than was kosher for a goodbye kiss, but still not long enough in my book. I was only inside a few minutes when someone knocked on the door. I threw it open, expecting it to be Nolan. Instead, it was a delivery man handing me a large bouquet of flowers.

“Jordyn Lewis?”

I nodded, staring wordlessly at the assortment. There was no way these were from Nolan. I knew that, but I was still hopeful when I set them on my kitchen table and checked the card.

“
Who is he, Jor? I’m not giving up without a fight.
”

There was no name, but I didn’t need a name. I knew exactly who had sent these flowers. And the person that sent them also knew exactly where I lived.

My stomach churned and I ran to the bathroom, making it just in time to retch into the toilet. Nolan thought that his past was complicated, but I worried that when he finally learned the truth about my past, he would decide I wasn’t worth the trouble and he would be right.

Nolan called me later in the day, after he had gotten a few hours of sleep. I expected him to be in better spirits, but he wasn’t calling with good news.

“I just got a call from my agent,” he said. “My contract says I need to be seen by the team’s doctor. If he clears me to play, I have to rejoin the team.”

“You’re leaving?” I tried not to sound completely devastated, but I failed.

“Yeah. I’m leaving early tomorrow.”

“How long will you be gone?”

“Three, four days at the most.” Nolan tried to sound chipper. “I’ll hurry back. I promise.”

“But not if they clear you to play. You won’t be back.” I didn’t like how my stomach twisted into knots at that thought.

Nolan said, “Yes, I will be back, Jordyn. Even if they say I’m physically able to play, my head is just not in a place where I can do it.”

“Do you really think you’re not ready?” I hated to think that Nolan might give up his dream just as it was starting.

“I don’t know.” He sighed. “Look, let’s not worry about it just yet. Not until we know what’s actually going to happen.”

“Alright.” I looked up and saw the flowers on the table and fought a chill that ran down my spine. I made a mental note to throw them away as soon as I was off the phone.

“I’m going to miss you,” he said shyly.

I pictured his adorable smile and an unexpected wave of emotion washed through me. “I’m going to miss you, too.”

“Good.” He paused and I felt myself falling hard for him in that moment. Even more so when he added, “Jordyn, I’m coming back to you. Just promise you’ll wait for me.”

Without a thought, I replied, “I promise.”