Finding Rebecca: A Novel of Love and the Holocaust (34 page)

Christopher pulled on his jacket as
he stood up. Anka knew not to make any noise. She would be safe here for just
one more day. This would work. He bent down to hug her before he left.
Christopher picked her up and held her in his arms for thirty seconds before
putting her back down onto the floor. As he put his hand on the doorknob, he
heard her call to him. She waved and he walked out with a deep smile on his
face. He ran a finger across his unshaven chin. He had a meeting in Auschwitz
with the other members of the Anti-Corruption Committee at 10. They were to
collate the results from the first week to present to the Lagerkommandant. The
committee had proven a great success. No one had asked why there had been so
few arrests and such a massive increase in revenues coming into Canada. No one
seemed to care. Christopher left Anka to go back to his dorm to shower and
shave. He had not seen Lahm since their conversation the other morning and he
wasn’t there as Christopher arrived in the room. Christopher wasted little time
getting showered and changed and went straight to the mess hall to wolf down
his breakfast, making sure to pocket some food for Anka. He made his way back
to Canada and his office, which was still empty, as always at this time. He
gave Anka her breakfast. It was a routine, one he would miss when she left. But
then there would be a new routine, with Rebecca.

All the members of the committee were
at the meeting, along with Friedrich, who was officially there as an observer.
Christopher stood up to address them. His hands were shaking. He put them
behind his back. The tension within him eased as he spoke about the numbers,
the figures behind the activities of the committee. Schultz came late, and sat
alone in the corner. Christopher saw them all in the room, Anka, Rebecca, and
even his father and his sister. His thoughts were independent of his words as
he addressed the committee seated before him. His thoughts were for the people
in the room only he could see.

The meeting ended with handshakes and
backs being slapped but Friedrich seemed less happy. He got out of his seat
with a sour look on his face and left without a word. No one shook Schultz’s
hand, and he went back to the crematorium to assist in burning the bodies of
the freshly murdered. The report was ready and Christopher would be the one to
present it to the Lagerkommandant. There was talk of a promotion for him, and that
the committee might be installed on a permanent basis, but Christopher didn’t
care about any of it. Muller, Flick and Breitner made their way down to the
train station to oversee the first selection of the day and Christopher went
back to the office for no other reason than he wanted to see Anka, to tell her about
the meeting and what had happened. She was under his desk drawing on the pieces
of paper he had left for her. He made sure that no one was looking when he
emptied her pot outside and came back to her, taking her on his lap as he sat
down behind his desk.

“We’re nearly there, my darling,” he
whispered in English. “This time tomorrow we’ll be on the road together. Don’t
worry. I won’t keep you in that suitcase the whole journey. We can hide you in
the back seat. Won’t my father be surprised?” He hugged her, pressing her head
into his chest and kissed the top of her head and felt her arms spread around
him.

There was a rap on the door and
Schultz’s voice bled through. “Herr Obersturmführer?”

Christopher opened the door just wide
enough to see the Sonderkommando’s face. “What is it?”

“Can I speak to the child?”
Christopher nodded and let him past. Schultz knelt down to the girl and put his
hand behind her head, stroking her hair. “How is she?” he asked.

 
“She’s doing very well under the
circumstances. She cries sometimes.”

“Don’t we all?” Schultz answered
without taking his eyes away from Anka. He began to speak to her in Czech.
Christopher tried to make out what he could, but there was nothing there for
him. Schultz pointed at Christopher and Anka smiled. He spoke for a minute, or
maybe more. Anka was smiling now and said something back to him. Schultz stood
up. “I told her. She knows.”

“What does she know?”

“She knows you’re taking her away
from here tomorrow. I told her she had to be quiet when you brought her out. I
told her that we would always be there for her and that you were going to keep
her safe.”

“What was that she said?”

“She is excited. She is looking
forward to seeing her family again.”

Schultz took her in his arms and
hugged her and then was gone. Christopher stayed in the room, watching her
eating the lunch that he had brought her. It was after one o’clock. Rebecca
would be nearing the end of her journey from Biberach. There would be a lot of
explaining to do. Rebecca would not be expecting to find him. There could be no
emotional reunion. He would have to keep his distance. His mask couldn’t slip,
not now.

Anka finished the bread and milk that
he had brought her and Christopher wiped her face with the handkerchief from
his pocket. She smiled at him. He left soon after, and as he closed the door,
he watched her crawl under the desk. He held the door ajar, staring at the
empty space where she had been, before finally closing the door and walking out
into the snow outside.

The crowd had gathered in the yard
outside Crematorium 4, but Christopher was long past the stage where he could
even watch this. The false hopes the SS officers instilled in the people tore
at his soul. Breitner was milling about in the yard, ledger in hand.
Christopher saw him approaching.

“There was a call for you earlier,
Herr Obersturmführer. Rapportführer Friedrich wanted you to meet him down in
the administration building, right away.”

“All the way over in Auschwitz?”

“That’s what he said to me. I believe
he’s down there waiting for you now.”

What could Friedrich want with him?
Was this something to do with Liebermann? Surely he couldn’t have said
something? He would be just as guilty as Christopher. The fires began within
Christopher’s body. There was snow on the ground and the roads were still being
cleared off. It would be difficult to get all the way down to Auschwitz on his
bike, but there were always cars to be borrowed. He made his way through the
crowd of people cowering together to stave off the cold. He made sure not to
make eye contact with any of them. He made his way inside the crematorium to
Kommandoführer Strunz’s office. Strunz was at his desk poring through papers.
He agreed to lend Christopher the keys to his car and Christopher made his way
back out of the crematorium through the crowds of people about to be murdered.
He felt himself brush up against them as he moved but kept his head down. It was
too much to look at them.

Christopher ran to the car and cursed
as the engine failed to start first time. He was just about to get out and look
for a mechanic when the engine finally revved into life. It was less than five
minutes to the main gate at Auschwitz and, although Christopher knew the guard
on duty, he still flashed his credentials as he passed through. A light snow
was falling, drifting down on a gentle wind. Christopher pulled in and parked
the car beside the Administrative Building, just inside the main gates. He
leapt out of the car, barely remembering to shut the door behind him and ran up
towards the door, only stopping when he knew he was in plain sight. It was
difficult to saunter the last few steps up to the door. Christopher made his
way down the hallway towards Liebermann’s office, feeling a chill in his blood
as he approached the door. Christopher knocked and waited for the word to
enter.

“Obersturmführer Seeler?” Liebermann
looked annoyed to see him. “What are you doing here?”

“I got a message to meet
Rapportführer Friedrich down here….”

“What? I know nothing about that. I
haven’t seen the Rapportführer at all today.”

Christopher felt the palms of his
hands wet with sweat. “Thank you Herr
Hauptsturmführer,
I’ll check with the secretary.” Christopher paced down the hallway into
secretary Aumeier’s office. Aumeier was sitting at his desk with his feet up as
Christopher walked in. He didn’t take them off as Christopher came in.
“Aumeier, is Rapportführer Friedrich here?”

“No,”
Aumeier looked perplexed. “Should he be? Frankly I’m surprised that you’re down
here yourself with what’s going on this afternoon.”

“What?”

“The
searches going on in Canada today. They were due to start at, well, about ten
minutes ago. I would have thought that you would have wanted to have been there
to oversee them, particularly when they go through your offices.” Aumeier
smiled. Christopher’s blood was ice inside him and the nausea in his stomach
suddenly made it difficult to stand.

“Oh,
yes.” Christopher managed a smile somehow. “I didn’t want to get in their way.
I’d better be going now.” Aumeier held up his hand and Christopher was gone. He
was dead. They would find Anka and he was dead. He realized why he had been
sent to the other side of the camp. This was Friedrich’s revenge, together with
Breitner. But what did that matter? The last office was empty, the phone sitting
on the desk and Christopher stole inside, closing the door behind him. There
was only one tiny chance. He called Crematorium 4, the phone seeming to take
hours to connect.
Kommandoführer Strunz’s assistant answered.

“Hello,
this is Obersturmführer Seeler, is Schultz there? I need to speak to him most
urgently.” Christopher heard the sound of the phone dropping and Schultz’s
voice came on. The
Kommandoführer’s
office was right beside the
incineration room. Christopher didn’t wait for him to speak. “Have the searches
begun?”

“Searches?”

“Canada
is being searched, as we speak. Friedrich is behind it. I’m down here in
Auschwitz; I was drawn away on purpose. You’ve got to get to Anka.”

The line
was silent for two excruciating seconds. “I hear the troops. The searches are
beginning. I…. I’m going to get her.”

“The
door is locked….” Christopher said, and then nothing. Schultz was gone.
Christopher cranked the phone, and then again. But there was no response and he
ran out of the office past the guard, almost losing his balance in the slip of
the snow. He threw the car door open and slammed down on the steering wheel as
the car failed to start again. The curse he roared was raw, painful in his
throat, and he turned the key again, this time starting the car. The wheels
skidded on the snow before they found the traction of the road and all he could
think of was Anka. He slowed the car to go out the gate and then accelerated as
much as he dared back towards the gate at Birkenau. His entire body was shaking
as the warehouses of Canada came into sight. The soldiers were tossing them and
there were blankets, clothes, tables, pot and pans, and countless boxes of what
had formerly been personal goods littering the snow outside. Christopher pulled
up outside, fifty yards from his office, and saw the troops entering the main
door. He was too late. There was no chance to stop them now. He turned around
to run, but there was nowhere to go. He walked towards the office and watched
as Flick, Muller and Breitner were marched out and the troops poured inside. He
felt the hope draining from inside him and the deep pool of mourning and rage
which instantly replaced it.

There
was one chance. He had to be officious. He approached the door of the office
and looked for the commanding officer; it was Friedrich himself. “What’s going
on here? I wasn’t informed of this,” Christopher said.
 

Friedrich
looked surprised to see him but didn’t mention it. “Standard searches that
happened everywhere else in the camp. No one is immune, not even the head of
the Anti-Corruption Committee.”

Christopher
pushed past him and inside. The troops were tearing the office apart and were
in the process of breaking down his door as he came in.

“I have
the key!” Christopher shouted, but the SS men ignored him and kicked the door
in. Several of them burst inide and Christopher rushed in behind them. The
window had been broken in the office and shards of glass littered the floor and
they ran around his desk. Nothing. Where was she? Christopher heard a gunshot
outside, then shouting. He ran out and an SS man was prodding Schultz forward,
towards Friedrich, and Flick and Muller looked on with Breitner, who was
standing next to Friedrich and another officer Christopher had not seen before.
Frankl came around the corner and Christopher heard her. He was dragging Anka
by the arm. Frankl looked directly at Christopher and then at Friedrich.

“We
found these two behind the offices. It seems the head of our Sonderkommandos
was trying to hide this one,” Frankl said and Friedrich nodded and withdrew his
pistol. He held it to Anka’s head and pulled the trigger and her head jerked
downwards and then up again, the spurt of blood staining the snow and spilling
onto Friedrich’s boots. Her body fell. Friedrich leveled the gun to Schultz’s
forehead, Christopher heard Schultz say something in Czech and saw the tears
rolling down his face as Friedrich pulled the trigger. Schultz’s body collapsed
in the snow beside Anka, his eyes still open, her hair saturated in black
blood. The pain in Christopher’s chest was more than he could bear and he bent
over double, unable to stand, and he ran behind the wooden office building and
vomited, the grief and guilt washing through his entire body like a wave. He
felt like he was going to drown.