Finding Isadora (36 page)

“
Well, I’m sure—” Grace broke off at the sound of the front door opening. “There’s your father.” Raising her voice, she called, “Hey, hon, we’re in the kitchen.”

“
Got enough for one more?” Jimmy Lee called back, and my pulse jumped. I stared down at the cheese and told myself it wouldn’t be Gabriel.

Two sets of footsteps came closer.

I discovered I was holding my breath.

Then Grace said,
“Gabriel! How good to see you. Of course we have enough food.”

I let my breath out and swallowed hard. Then, finally, I forced myself to raise my eyes.

He stood in the kitchen doorway, staring at me. Gabriel, in jeans and a charcoal gray shirt with the neck unbuttoned and the sleeves rolled up. Gabriel, looking so good he robbed me of what little breath I had left.

“
Isadora,” he said softly. “I didn’t know you’d be here.” His eyes flicked to my ears and his lips curved.

“
It was a last minute thing,” I said just as Jimmy Lee gave me a hug and said, “Hey, kid, nice surprise.”

I hugged him back, savoring the warm comfort of his arms, the familiar brush of his beard against my cheek, and realized I was smiling.
“Yeah. Yeah it is.” Then I dared to turn my smile toward Gabriel. “Hello, Gabriel.”

Why did I so often feel his eyes were sending me secret messages? Messages I couldn
’t quite—or didn’t dare—interpret? Hurriedly, I said, “Have you met Alyssa McKenzie?”

Gabriel came into the crowded kitchen and bent to offer Alyssa his hand.
“Hi, Alyssa. I’m sorry your mom isn’t feeling so well. But I hear she’s getting out of the hospital soon.”

“
She’s coming to live with us,” the girl said.

Gabriel
’s face went still, then he gave a rueful chuckle. “Must be slipping. I should’ve seen that one coming.”

The girl
gazed at him and said shyly, “Who are you?”

“
Sorry,” I said. “His name is Gabriel DeLuca. He’s … a friend of Grace’s and Jimmy Lee’s.” It was true, and much less complicated than explaining that he was Jimmy Lee’s lawyer.

Jimmy Lee turned from hugging Grace and gave Alyssa a squeeze.
“Hey, I like your earrings,” he told her.

“
Izzie gave them to me. She said you gave them to her.”

Jimmy Lee turned to me.
“Thought they looked familiar. Well, I’m glad those parrots have found another happy home. Your earrings are pretty fine too, Izzie. Haven’t seen those ones before, have I?”

“
No.” I couldn’t keep myself from darting a glance at Gabriel, who was watching me. “They were a gift from a friend.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Gabriel smile again.

Grace made a shooing motion with her hands. “There are too many people in this kitchen and nothing’s getting done. Jimmy Lee, you and Gabriel get yourself drinks and go on into the living room. Dinner’ll be ready in about twenty minutes. If you leave us alone.”

Jimmy Lee reached into the fridge, pulled out two cans of beer, and tossed one to Gabriel, who caught it neatly.

“Like I told you before,” Gabriel said, “I need to talk to you and Grace.” The smile had turned into a frown, and his voice had an edge I’d never heard before. “Could Isadora and Alyssa go read a book or something for a while?”

Grace shook her head firmly.
“We can talk after dinner. Speaking of which, why not call Richard and invite him over?”

Gabriel fumbled the beer can, almost dropping it.

Heart aching, I tried to think what to say. Well, I could give them part of the truth. “Richard’s at a hockey game.” Avoiding Gabriel’s eyes, I explained briefly about Richard’s new relationship with Eric and Caroline Winston.

Grace paused in the middle of stirring a cream sauce.
“That’s really nice. It makes me think more highly of Richard.” Then she rushed to add, “Not that I didn’t like him, Gabriel, but I hadn’t seen that side of him.”

“
Me either,” Gabriel murmured so quietly I doubted anyone else heard him.

“
So, Izzie,” Jimmy Lee said, “maybe you knew what you were doing after all, hooking up with Richard.”

“
I…” I swallowed hard, feeling the burn of unshed tears. It was hardly the moment to spread the news of our breakup, and yet this conversation was getting increasingly awkward. And deceptive. I was too exhausted to carry on the pretense any longer. Besides, they’d all know sooner or later. So I cleared my throat and said softly, “Richard and I aren’t … a couple any longer. We’re—I hope we’re going to be—friends.”

All action ceased momentarily, except for Alyssa flicking her earrings with her fingertips. I didn
’t look at Gabriel, but I felt the tension level in the room rise.

“
Oh, yeah?” Jimmy Lee said disbelievingly. “How come?”

“
Uh…” How to explain it, with Gabriel only a few feet away? I shrugged helplessly.

“
This isn’t the right time, Jimmy Lee,” Grace said quietly.

“
Huh? Oh, yeah. Guess not.” He came over to peer into my eyes. “You okay, Izzie?”

“
I’m okay.” I met his gaze, letting him see everything. My hurt and disappointment, my fear, but also the certainty I was doing the right thing.

He rested a hand on my shoulder, and his touch made the tears rise again. I patted his hand, murmured,
“Not now,” and hurried over to the fridge. “I’ll start the salad.” Flinging the door open, I took refuge behind the heavy door and let the chill air cool my flushed cheeks.

When I
’d gathered the ingredients and emerged from the fridge, Gabriel and Jimmy Lee had retreated to the living room. I rinsed a head of romaine and gave it to Alyssa to tear into the salad bowl, then began to slice raw vegetables.

“
Are you really okay, hon?” Grace asked me softly, hugging my shoulders.

It was too much. I couldn
’t hold back the tears any longer. For a moment, just a moment, I put my head on my mother’s shoulder and let myself cry.

A warm little hand crept into mine and tugged on it.
“Izzie? Did you and your boyfriend break up?” Alyssa’s voice was full of concern.

I swiped my hands under my eyes and flicked away the tears, then knelt down.
“Yes, we did, Alyssa. But it’s okay. I thought we belonged together, but we really don’t.”

The girl nodded.
“That’s what Mommy says about my father. I guess it’s hard, being a grownup.”

“
Sometimes it is. But having friends like you helps.” And it was true. The smile I gave her was genuine, and my tears retreated.

When we all got back to work, Grace whispered to me,
“I’m so sorry, hon. Now I know why you wanted some family time. I promise we’ll find an opportunity to really talk.”

“
Just being around you and Jimmy Lee and Alyssa helps,” I said, slicing into a tomato. “I thought I wanted a long teary conversation, but this is better. I’ve had enough tears to last me for a while.”

“
You should have called.”

“
It felt disloyal to tell anyone else, before Richard. We only talked about it last night.”

“
It was your decision then.” Grace nodded, as if she’d guessed that. “Not that it makes things any easier. Poor baby.” She gave me a brisk pat on the back. “Get slicing, or we’ll never eat.”

When I obeyed, she added softly,
“For what it’s worth, I think you made a wise decision. Richard may be a great guy, but I just didn’t see the two of you as a couple. Or think you had that special spark.”

Spark. I glanced into the living room at the same moment Gabriel looked my way. Any more spark, and the air might spontaneously combust. Hurriedly, I looked down again, just in time to avoid slicing off my thumb.

Fortunately, Grace had moved to the stove to grasp the heavy pot of pasta. She drained the rigatoni, tossed it into a casserole dish along with the creamy cheese sauce, topped it with toasted bread crumbs, and put the dish in the oven. “You don’t need to bake it,” she told Alyssa, “because all the ingredients are already cooked. But I like giving it fifteen minutes so the flavors come together.”

Alyssa nodded.
“The lettuce is done. Maybe I should start my homework? Then we can go see my mommy after supper?”

“
That’s a good idea.”

After the girl had hurried off, Grace said,
“Darn, I’d forgotten we’d promised to take her to the hospital. And Gabriel wants to talk to us, too. Isadora, I’m not sure—”

“
It’s okay, honestly. I’m already feeling a lot better. We’ll talk on the weekend, when things aren’t so rushed.”

She nodded, then said,
“Do you think you and Richard can stay friends?”

“
I sure hope so. I do love him.”

My mother studied my face.
“How’s he doing?”

“
He’s mad. Hurt. Confused. He doesn’t believe in that spark you’re so keen on.”

“
Hmm. One day he’ll experience it, then he’ll believe. Who knows, maybe now that he’s interested in that boy, he’ll get involved with the mother.”

I suppressed a twinge of unwarranted jealousy.
“Caroline? I don’t think so, though apparently she does share his fondness for hockey. Or at least pretends to. No, I see Richard with another lawyer.”

“
Yeah, there’s a lot to be said for sharing work and other interests. But then there’s more opportunity for discussion, stimulation, learning, when you have different ideas and interests. Guess the really important thing is sharing basic values, and truly loving each other.” She winked at me. “And spark.”

She went to the fridge and rummaged inside.
“Give him my best wishes when you talk to him. What he’s doing is admirable. Looks like he has some of his father in him after all.”

If Gabriel really was his father.

I glanced through to the living room where my dad and Gabriel seemed to be arguing. And again it was as if Gabriel sensed my attention. He turned his head, met my gaze, and held it for a long moment before turning back to Jimmy Lee. I shivered.

To Grace I said,
“Gabriel is more than Jimmy Lee’s lawyer. He’s become your friend.”

My mother, who was
mixing up salad dressing, nodded. “I feel like we’ve known him for years.”

“
It’s strange you didn’t get to know each other before. You’re involved in the same type of causes, and he even acted as Jimmy Lee’s lawyer before.”

Grace shrugged.
“People come into your life when the time is right.”

I drew in a shaky breath. Had the time been right for Gabriel
DeLuca to come into my life?

Maybe so. He
’d been the catalyst that had made me realize something significant was missing in my relationship with Richard. He’d even gotten me reexamining my priorities, and choosing to volunteer my time for a good cause.

I liked him. I respected him. I wanted him in my life. But only as a friend. I
’d thought Richard was my perfect match and been proven wrong, so it would be sheer idiocy to enter into a relationship with a man who I knew was wrong for me from the beginning. Besides, it would shatter Richard if his father and I… What? Did I have the guts to finish the thought?

If his father and I had sex, and he found out.

With Gabriel, it could never be more than having sex, because the man refused to let himself love. And for me, there was no point to a relationship without love.

But was it possible to achieve a friendship with Gabriel, when the man
’s mere presence made my nerve endings sizzle?

I glanced at Grace, who was vigorously shaking
the bottle of home-made dressing. Could I talk to her about this? Was there any hope she’d understand, when the two of us had such different perspectives on morality? No, she’d just say “go for it.”

I reached into the fridge, grabbed a beer, and held the can to one cheek, then the other.

That was how Gabriel and Jimmy Lee found me when they came into the kitchen. Hurriedly I lowered the can, opened it, and took a slug, only belatedly becoming aware Gabriel seemed as tense as I felt.

“
Jimmy Lee says to wait,” Gabriel said, “but we have to talk. That’s why I came over.”

Grace swung away from the stove.
“I thought Jimmy Lee invited you for dinner.”

“
I called him at work all afternoon and didn’t want to leave a message. The last time, someone said he’d already headed home. So I came over and caught up as he was walking from the bus stop.” He glanced at me. “This is between your parents and me. Want to go keep Alyssa occupied?”

Jimmy Lee shook his head.
“I have no secrets from Izzie. If this is about the case, I want her to hear it.”