Fighting Silence (17 page)

It was then that I tasted it.

Beer.

I slammed my arms back down to the bed. “Till, wait. We can’t do this.” I turned my head to disconnect the kiss, but it only caused him to latch on to my neck again.

“Yes, we can,” he growled, raking his teeth across my skin.

Yes, we could.

“No. We can’t. Remember last time? It almost ruined everything.” I groaned as he ever so slightly rolled his hips against my core. “Seriously, we have to stop. You’re drunk and not thinking straight. You’ll thank me in the morning.” I shifted to the side, trying to squeeze out from under his large body, but he had me pinned.

His hand found my breast, sending a rush of heat between my legs, bypassing my brain completely. “I’m not drunk. Yeah, I was drinking, but I’ve wanted to have you again since the second I pulled out of you the first time. I need you.”

But I needed him too—in a totally different way.

“No. Last time, you disappeared for six months. I can’t go through that again.” I shimmied myself up the bed to escape the mounting pressure his hard-on was coaxing as he continuously slid it against me.

“I won’t leave ever again. I swear. It’s me and you forever, Eliza.”

Eliza.

Forever.

With Till.

His hazel eyes studied me as I weighed my options. I knew that it was going to rock our world, but with his promise of forever still ringing in my ears, I didn’t care if the entire world flipped upside down. I could have sat there all day and tried to rationalize everything out, but the fact was that my body had made its decision the moment he’d said my name.

I licked my lips again then leaned forward and licked his. “Take it off.”

He let out a loud growl then tore the shirt over my head. His mouth covered mine as I began fumbling with the button on his jeans. I barely even had them unzipped before I wedged a hand inside and wrapped it around his cock.

“Fuck,” he gasped, dropping his forehead to my chest and rolling his hips, gliding his shaft through my hand.

Supporting himself on an elbow, he popped a breast from my bra and sucked it into his mouth. My hand froze as I arched off the bed. I remembered the first time Till’s tongue circled my nipple, and this was nothing like that. This was rough and raw. His teeth nipped and his tongue soothed. His hand kneaded the soft flesh as he held my breast to his mouth.

Suddenly, his mouth disappeared, but it reappeared in the form of gentle bite at my side. He dragged his tongue up the curve of my breast and plucked my nipple between his fingers before sensually rolling it.

“Oh, God!” I gasped and grabbed the back of his head, trying to aim his mouth somewhere, although I wasn’t particularly sure where I wanted him to start.

My hand fell away as Till rose to his knees. He watched as I undulated under his skilled touch. He wasn’t the only man I had ever been with, but he was the only one my body recognized.

“Fucking hell, Eliza. Do you have any idea how hard you make me?” He glided his other hand up my stomach until it reached my breast. “I fucking love when I get here and you’re already in bed. Your nipples get hard for me the second I crawl through that window. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve left here with blue balls from these fucking nipples alone.”

That was definitely news to me. Fan-fucking-tastic news to me.

He firmly squeezed my breasts before leaning forward and swiping his tongue across one. Then he switched to the other and came back again.

“Goddamn, I love your tits,” he said through breathy kisses then sucked as much of my breast into his mouth as he possibly could.

His hand massaged and his tongued swirled. I wished I could have come from that alone, but I needed more. My legs opened and I inched myself down the bed as I sought out some form of pressure against my clit.

“Please. Till.” My hips circled off the bed but came up empty.

He noticed my need and shifted up the bed, pressing his thigh against my covered core. Sparks ignited me the moment I found friction. Just as I reached down to once again find his cock, his hands disappeared, causing a strangled objection to escape my throat.

“I need to see it,” his jagged voice demanded, but it wasn’t like I was trying to stop him. I’d have shown him damn near anything he wanted at that point. I just didn’t know what he was referring to.

He guided my back off the bed, and then, with one hand, he unclasped my bra and slid it off my arms. No sooner than I was exposed, he groaned deeply and brushed his nose across my nipple, laving his tongue under the curve of my right breast.

“I haven’t been able to come without envisioning this freckle. It fucking ruined me.”

“It’s a just freckle. It can’t ruin you,” I said breathily, continuing to grind myself against his thigh.

“Bullshit. It’s
your
freckle. It could destroy me.”

My chest seized at his words, and my hips stilled.

It had always been Till for me, but with that sentiment, I felt like maybe it was always me for Till. The sense of overwhelming belonging set me ablaze. The burning heat made its way to my hands as I threaded my fingers in his hair and fisted it to tilt his head back.

“I want you. Now,” I said brazenly.

He drew in a hiss through his teeth, leaning away from my grasp to increase the tension. The muscles of his neck flexed as his eyes narrowed, and a one-sided smile tipped his lips. It was the wrong side though. This smile was dangerous, but under his touch, I was fearless.

“Take whatever you want. It’s all yours anyway.” He finished with a nip.

I tugged his shirt off then went to work on his pants. They were already unzipped, but I wanted them gone. I roughly pushed Till down to his back and slid off the bed, taking his pants with me. After that, mine gave his company on the floor.

His cock sprung free, and without a second of hesitation, I kneeled on the bed and took him in my mouth.

“Fuck,” he groaned through clenched teeth as his hands made their way into my hair. He brushed it to the side and watched me intently. His abs rippled as I worked him, but as much as I loved his every involuntary reaction, his eyes were what really commanded my attention. They owned me, and we both knew it.

Till gently guided my head into a rhythm. It was unapologetic yet permissive. Possessive yet desperate. Dominant yet seeking validation. It was the ever-present dichotomy of Till Page. The boy and the man.

I wished that I’d had more time to really enjoy watching Till lost in the sensations I provided him. But there would be plenty of time for that later.
Forever.

With a groan, he dragged me up his body. “Goddammit, Eliza. I could fuck your mouth for days, but I’m not finishing until I’ve had you completely.”

After he rolled us so he covered me, his mouth crashed into mine in a needy meeting.

There was nothing gentle as his hand dived between my legs. I had barely adjusted to the intrusion of his fingers before they were gone and his length pressed to my opening.

“God, Till,” I breathed, lifting my hips to urge him forward. Knowing I was only seconds away from having him again—and getting to keep him—made me impatient.

He dragged the head of his cock through my folds. “You get wet like this for everyone?” he asked with a painful groan. He was torturing me almost as much as he was himself.

“Just you,” I whispered, and his head popped up, signaling that he hadn’t heard me. “Just you,” I repeated.

“
Just
me.”

It wasn’t confirmation of my answer—it was an order. A menacing smirk formed on his lips. I didn’t recognize it from Till’s repertoire of smiles. But then again, I’d never lay naked in front of Till the man.

My mouth fell open as he pressed inside. My muscles clenched around him, relishing every inch he gave me.

He stilled once he’d filled me. “Tonight, you come on my cock. It’s the one thing I’ve been missing.” He glided out agonizingly slowly and then drove back in. A sharp cry escaped my throat. “Oh, fuck you feel good, Eliza.”

“Ahhh!” I breathed as he once again eased out.

My eyes closed and my head fell back against the pillow as I anxiously anticipated another deep thrust. But he froze with only the head of his cock nestled inside me.

“You need me to take it easy, baby?”

“No. Please don’t. Fuck me hard, Till.”

His eyes grew wide, and his cock twitched inside me. “Jesus Christ. I should fuck your mouth more often.”

The small smile that tilted the corner of his mouth gave me a flash of the boy I’d originally fallen in love with. I loved this sexy and dirty version of Till, but that one twitch of his lips turned me on more than any words he could ever utter.

And when it was replaced by a core-clenching smirk, I knew that, no matter what happened after that moment, I’d never be able to go back to being friends. One glance and I was addicted.

I buried myself to the hilt inside her.

My mind was foggy from the alcohol, but I knew exactly what I was doing. I was a thief, but I had convinced myself that it wasn’t wrong. I was only stealing what was rightfully mine. The way her eyes had lit when I’d said, “Forever,” told me that she thought this was more. I would have corrected her if I hadn’t meant it from the bottom of my soul. I’d just known I couldn’t follow through.

“Till!” she gasped.

“I need to feel you come.” I drove into her in the way I fucking loved, and judging by the sound of her moans, so did she. But despite how hard I took her, she didn’t come.

She cried my name and her body writhed, but she wouldn’t step off the edge.

“Goddammit, tell me what you like?” I growled, taking her mouth in a frustrated kiss.

“Here.” She pushed a hand between us to find her clit.

I knew how to make her come with my hands. Based on the last time we had been together, that was easy. But I had three years of dreams fueling me with an overwhelming desire to make her come with my cock.

“No hands.” I grabbed her arms and pushed them above her head, securing both of her wrists in one of my hands. “I want you to come because of this.” I pointedly pumped inside her, driving myself toward the brink of orgasm with every thrust.

“I can’t,” she whined, struggling to free her arms.

“Yes, you can.”

I continued a hard rhythm that was slowly driving me mad. Her moans and cries were encouraging, so I waged war against my own release.

She could do it. I would give it to her. I would
take
it from her.

“Use
your
hands then,” she bargained

“No. Damn it. It’s the only thing I don’t have from you, Eliza. If I have to fuck you until I go soft, then I’ll lick you until I get hard again. You will come without using your fucking hands.”

Her eyes flashed to mine in shock . . .
and arousal.

“Christ, Till.”

“I’ve got all night. Tell me how to get you off.”

“I don’t know! Damn it, please just touch me,” she panted, raking her nails down my back.

I was so focused on trying to figure out how to take the last piece I needed to finish my Eliza Reynolds collection that I missed the fact that I was ruining it for her.

“Okay, okay.” I continued a rhythm but finally dropped my hand between her legs.

The minute my thumb brushed her swollen nub, her whole body spasmed. She didn’t come, but I knew she was on the way.

“So, my dick gets you close, but this is what you need?” I circled her clit, and she tensed around me.
So fucking close.

“Yes. I’m sorry.” She rolled her hips to ride me from the bottom.

“Apologize by milking my cock. Come on, Eliza.” Sliding an arm under her ass, I lifted her lower half off the bed to allow for a better angle. With my thumb moving furiously, I drilled inside her.

Fucking finally, her whole body quaked and her muscles pulsated.

There it is.

“God. Till.”

Oh, I had missed the sweet sound of her ecstasy.

“Fuck,” I grit out as my cock shot off inside her. I fell forward, catching myself with my arms beside her head as I filled her. “Goddamn, Eliza.” I tried to catch my breath, but the aftershocks continued to course through my balls.

“I love you so much.” She took my mouth until I began to soften inside her.

“I love you too. Always,” I promised between kisses.

For the next half hour, we lay in bed kissing and getting to know each other’s naked bodies in a much less sexual nature. It was casual but needy. The sex was amazing, but those moments were what my fantasies were really made of.

Fantasy, but not reality.