Read Fighting for Desire Online
Authors: Sarah Bale
If Dev’s arm hadn’t been around her waist supporting her,
Shannon was positive she would have passed out. Johnny smiled at Dev with no
sincerity.
“Pleasure to meet you.” Dev shook Johnny’s hand. “This is my
friend, Shannon Bray.”
Johnny turned his eyes to her and smiled. “Nice to meet you,
Ms. Bray.”
He held out his hand and she gritted her teeth. Ignoring him
would be rude, so she reached out. But instead of shaking her hand, he kissed
it. The feeling of his lips against her skin made her want to scream in
protest.
He held onto her a moment longer before releasing her. If
Dev thought the gesture was strange, he didn’t let on.
“So, Mr. Ice, what business are you in?”
Johnny grinned at Dev. “I own some nightclubs here and there
but my main income comes from stocks.”
She knew he was lying. If he did trade stocks, then it was
illegal. Johnny hadn’t earned an honest dollar in his entire life.
He went on. “There is just something about MMA that I find
so…intriguing though. I find myself wanting to be involved.”
“Understandable. A lot of people are intrigued by the
sport.”
Johnny shook his head. “I’m not intrigued by the sport. I’m
fascinated with the hand-to-hand combat aspect. The ass kicking.”
A moment of awkward silence passed and then Dev replied
smoothly, “Well that is a part of it, I suppose.”
Johnny laughed loudly, causing others to look their way. “I
won’t hold you up, Dev. I can call you Dev, right?” Without waiting for an
answer he went on. “Enjoy the party and we can talk shop later.” He turned to
Shannon and bowed. “Enjoy yourself too, my lovely lady.”
Shannon did roll her eyes this time and he must have seen
her because his eyes narrowed for a moment before the scowl left his face. He knew
how to play the game and she needed to remember that he could outplay her.
Dev led her toward another group of people, whom he
obviously knew. Just as Katie predicted there were a lot of bad jokes being
tossed around. And the single women at the party made several attempts to get
Dev’s attention but he ignored them.
Seeing the model-type women walking away with their heads
hung in defeat boosted Shannon’s ego. She was a nobody compared to them and yet
he’d picked her.
At one point Dev leaned over and whispered into her ear,
“Having fun?”
She nodded. “Yes. There are so many different types of
people here to watch.”
People watching had always been one of her hobbies. He
stroked her lower back and she shivered.
“We could always leave, if you want. Find other ways to
amuse ourselves.”
She peered up at him through her lashes and saw dark desire
staring back at her.
Before she could answer Marco came up to them. “I know that
look, Dev. Don’t go running off just yet. There are still some more people you
need to talk to.”
Dev cursed and Shannon laughed.
“Poor baby,” she whispered. “I’ll make it up to you later.”
He grinned. “I’m going to hold you to that.”
Marco tapped his arm and the two men walked toward another
group of people, leaving Shannon alone for the first time that evening. She
didn’t see Johnny and she prayed he was gone. As she reached the refreshment
table a hand went around her waist. She leaned in, expecting to see Dev, but she
wasn’t that lucky.
“Ah, Shannon. Playing your part so well.”
She pulled away. “What in the fuck do you think you are
doing? Don’t ever put your hands on me again!”
Johnny watched her for a moment and then said, “It didn’t
bother you in the past now did it?” Without letting her reply he continued,
“Make sure Dev leaves the party by midnight.”
“What happens at midnight?”
His eyes narrowed and she took a step back. No one around
them even seemed to notice what was going on and that scared her. He fit in too
well…
“Your job isn’t to ask questions, you bitch. It’s to keep
your boy distracted, which you are doing well so far. He can barely keep his
hands off you.” He looked her up and down. “Your erect nipples are probably
driving him crazy. I know I’ve wanted to sample them.”
She lifted her hand to slap him across the face but he
caught her arm and then held onto her hand as if he was caressing it.
“Watch it, bitch. I could still ruin this for you. Remember
I know all your secrets.” He let her hand go and straightened his tie.
“Midnight and not a second later.”
He called out to a man and woman who were passing and joined
their group with a huge smile planted on his face. When he was gone she hugged
herself and shuddered. What in the fuck was she doing? She shouldn’t be here,
lying to Dev. She should be working two jobs, trying to survive.
Her chest tightened and for a moment she feared she was
going to have a panic attack right there in the middle of Dev’s party. Closing
her eyes, she counted to ten and remembered that she was safe. The panicked
feeling lessened and she took in a long, deep breath, filling her lungs.
She needed to talk to Dev, tell him everything. Leading him
on wasn’t fair, especially now that Johnny was there, wanting to sponsor his
fights. Things were getting out of hand and she was tired of all the lies.
For the first time in eight years she knew she was about to do
the right thing. After she talked to Dev, he would never want to see her again
but she could live with the repercussions. All that mattered was his safety,
and playing along with Johnny wasn’t the safe thing to do.
She made her way through the various groups of people, her
focus on Dev, but just before she reached him a smiling Katie stepped in Shannon’s
path.
“You are rocking that dress tonight, Shannon! Heads keep
turning your way.”
“Thanks, Katie.” She peered over her shoulder. “I’m actually
trying to find Dev.”
Katie waved her hand as if dismissing Shannon’s goal. “He’s
talking shop right now. Come on, I want you to meet my husband.”
Katie took Shannon by the hand and led her in the opposite
direction, away from Dev. At least Johnny wasn’t nearby. A tall blond man stood
near the edge of the roof, leaning against the railing. He held a glass of champagne
and took a sip as they approached.
Somehow he wasn’t the type of guy she expected Katie to be
with. Shannon pictured someone more like…well, someone like Marco.
“Shannon, this is my husband, Hugh.”
He smiled, showing off two dimpled cheeks. Okay, she could
kind of see the appeal, with his surfer-boy good looks.
“Nice to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.”
Shannon grinned. “I love your accent. Australia?”
He grinned back. “Born and raised in Sydney.”
His hotness factor climbed with each word he spoke.
“What do you do for a living?” she asked.
“When Kat and I are back in Sydney I volunteer with the fire
and rescue service. When I’m not in Sydney I do a little modeling here and
there.”
Katie chimed in. “Unfortunately we aren’t in Sydney as much
as we’d like. Hugh also does a lot of fundraising for the fire brigade as we
travel.”
Shannon had thought Katie lived in Vegas but it sounded as
if they traveled a lot. Shannon took another peek at Hugh. She knew for a fact
she had seen him on the cover of more than one magazine. She felt almost
star-struck standing next to him.
Marco walked up to their group and kissed Katie on the
cheek. Shannon noticed a moment of tension before the men shook hands.
“I’m glad you two could make it,” he said.
Katie beamed up at him. “We wouldn’t have missed it, would
we, Hugh?”
Hugh nodded. “Always a pleasure, Marco.”
The way he said Marco’s name sounded like a caress and sent
shivers down her spine. What on earth was going on with the three of them?
“What happened the other night, just out of curiosity?”
Marco asked Hugh.
Hugh shrugged. “The club was crowded so we left.”
“Didn’t think to text me and let me know?”
Katie jumped into the conversation smoothly. “Boys, boys…now
is not the time for this…”
What in the heck were they talking about?
Shannon suddenly felt uncomfortable. “Well if you will
excuse me, I need to find Dev.”
She spotted him standing with a group of women who were
fawning all over him. As she made her way toward him, his face lit up in a smile.
“Ladies, always a pleasure,” he said.
She swore she heard a sigh as he walked away. Of course she
couldn’t blame them, especially when he was dressed in all black. He was
definitely swoon-worthy.
She grinned as he pulled her into his arms.
“What?” he asked.
“You. I’ve never seen you in your element before. It’s kind
of sexy.”
His eyebrow lifted. “Oh?”
She laughed. “Yeah. Very sexy.”
His arms tightened around her waist. “You know we could
always leave.”
Johnny’s words danced in her mind. “What time is it?”
Dev looked at his watch. “Almost midnight. Still want to
bounce?”
“Yes I do. Come on, sexy. Let’s go.”
She took him by the hand and led him toward the elevators.
No one seemed to notice their departure and she was glad. If Marco saw them, he
would stop them. If Johnny saw them, he would get too much enjoyment.
As the doors closed Dev nuzzled her neck. “Did you have a
good time tonight?”
“I met Katie’s husband. He wasn’t what I expected.”
He chuckled. “Expecting someone more like Marco?”
“Yes, I honestly was. What exactly is going on with the
three of them?”
“You noticed that too, huh?” He pulled her closer and went
on. “Katie and Marco used to be an item. It got ugly when Katie wanted more
than Marco could give so she left and married Hugh.”
“I understand that much but what is going on with the three
of them now?”
His hands began to make their way down her back until they
reached her ass and then he squeezed. A gasp left her lips as the elevator came
to a stop on their floor.
“I don’t ask questions about things that aren’t my business,
Shan.”
“But if you were to guess?”
“I’d say they’re fucking. All three of them.”
An image of Dev and Marco sharing a woman flashed through
her mind.
He must have sensed her thoughts because he laughed. “Oh no.
I’m not opening that can of worms. The past is the past, babe. No need to
relive all the gritty details.”
She looked up at him. If only he truly meant that the past
could stay in the past.
Dev held back another laugh as he watched Shannon’s mind
working. She might deny it but he could always tell when something perplexed
her. And apparently she was about to grill him regarding Marco’s relationship
with Katie and Hugh.
He opened the door to their room and pulled her inside. He needed
to get her out of that sexy dress. Now.
“Does that mean Marco is bi?”
He laughed. “What? I don’t know.”
“Well you would have to know…”
He sighed. “You aren’t going to let this go are you?”
She shook her head. “Not until you answer my questions.”
He led her to their room and untied his tie but left it
hanging around his neck.
“Okay, shoot. But I’m not promising to answer everything.”
“Fair enough. Did you two ever share a woman?”
Whoa, right to the big one! He peered at her and then nodded.
“Yeah, we have shared a woman before.”
“How?”
“Are you asking how we could be so
disrespectful to women
or the actual mechanics?”
She blushed. “The mechanics.”
Still not knowing if she really wanted to hear, he began
slowly. “We would take the woman to the room and I would usually start by
kissing her neck or her ear. Never her mouth though. I always built up to the
mouth.”
“Show me.”
He ran his hand through his hair. “Shan, I don’t know what
you want…”
“I’ve always wondered okay? So…show me.”
What in the hell was going on? He shook his head, trying to
clear the foggy feeling.
“Dev…please don’t make me ask again.”
Her cheeks flushed and unease showed in her eyes. But there
was also desire staring back at him. He moved behind her and wrapped his arms
around her waist. Taking in a deep breath, he could smell the vanilla in her
shampoo. He ran his nose against her neck before nipping her earlobe.
She gasped as he tugged on the lobe with his teeth before
letting go.
“Marco would usually join in at this point,” he said as he
ran his hands over her stomach. “While I kissed her, he would begin his own
tour of her body. He likes to start at a woman’s breasts for obvious reasons.”
He lifted one hand to cup her right breast. She leaned back
against his chest and he massaged the round globe until her nipple peaked.
“Since Marco is enjoying all the fun in the front, I drop to
my knees and worship her back.”
He lowered to the floor and held onto her hips. She watched
him over her shoulder with hooded eyes as he ran his hands down her legs and
then underneath her dress.
“I think you have too many clothes on for what comes next.”
She reached back to unclasp her dress but he stopped her.
“Oh no, Shannon. I didn’t give you permission to take off your
clothes. And if Marco were here, he would agree.”
“Permission? I don’t understand.”
He wondered what she would say when he explained the next
part. Would she still want to go on or would she tell him to fuck off?
“When Marco and I share a woman we share her under certain
terms.”
“And those terms are?”
“We are in control and the woman goes along with what we
want.”
Her mouth fell open. “Like Domination and submission?”
He chuckled. “Kind of like that. More kinky than anything
though.”
“But…you haven’t showed any signs of liking that kind of
stuff before…”
“Haven’t I? Are you sure about that? Think about it, Shan. I
like control. I like to be in charge.”
She smiled. “I would have never guessed you would be into
that freaky shit.”
He laughed. “Honey, you were just as freaky as me the other
night.”
Her face turned bright red and he went on. “It’s not
something that defines my lifestyle. It’s actually more of Marco’s forte.”
That was an understatement. Marco was heavily into the BDSM
scene while Dev only dabbled a bit.
“But when you share a woman it’s something you do?”
“Yes.”
He could tell she was thinking it over so he said, “Take off
your dress.”
He purposely changed his tone to commanded attention and he
got the result he was looking for when her eyes widened.
“Dev?”
“I said take off your dress. Don’t make me tell you a third
time.”
He swatted her bottom as he finished speaking. Not hard
enough to hurt but enough to get his message across. He meant business.
She unclasped the dress and let it fall, baring her upper
body. Damn, she looked so good he thought about telling her to stay that way.
She quickly shimmied out of the dress and stood in nothing but her teal thong
and heels.
“No bra? Oh, I approve of that.”
She grinned. “What would happen next?”
He swatted her again and she jumped.
“I didn’t say you could speak now did I?” He massaged the
spot where his hand had left a slight red mark. “Of course the women who play
with Marco and me would already know the rules.”
Her eyes were bright with questions so he went on. “But I
wouldn’t expect you to know them. Not yet at least.”
Her eyes lowered. “I’m sure it’s not something I could learn
in a month.”
Damn, he hated how his heart panged in his chest. She was
right though. She couldn’t learn his rules in a month. They would need more
time but time was something they didn’t have on their side. He kissed her
shoulder and didn’t reply. Lying to her…or to himself…wouldn’t do any good. Not
when they both knew the truth.
Shannon took in a deep breath, willing her tears to leave
her eyes before she turned to face Dev.
“I’m getting a headache. I think I’m just going to go to
bed.”
She walked across the room and entered the bathroom, closing
the door before he could stop her. She turned the sink on and then let her
tears fall. Why couldn’t things be different?
Just when she thought they were getting along something
would happen and remind her she was living on bought time. She splashed water
on her face, trying to wash away any remnants of her tears. Luckily her lips
weren’t swollen or there would be no hiding the fact she’d been crying.
She took her hair down and brushed it until it was smooth. A
soft knock on the door made her pause.
“Shan…are you okay?”
He was using his pet name for her more and more often. He probably
didn’t even realize what he was doing or the pain the nickname caused each
time.
She took in a slow breath. “I’m fine. I’ll be right out.”
She turned off the water and then slipped out of her heels.
She picked them up by the straps and walked out of the bathroom. He stood by
the door, watching her. She padded to her suitcase and grabbed an oversized
t-shirt. Tonight she was going for comfort and nothing else.
Dev watched her in silence as she slipped on the shirt and
then climbed into the bed. If he was disappointed they weren’t going to have
sex, he didn’t show his feelings. He began to undress and she pulled the covers
around her head so she didn’t have to watch.
If she watched, she would be tempted to act. If she acted,
she would lose her heart forever. And forever was a damn long time. The
mattress dipped as he climbed in next to her. His cologne drifted toward her
and she buried her face in the pillow to block the scent. Lying like this was
torture.
His arm snaked around her waist and he pulled her close,
enveloping her in his warmth.
“I’m sorry,” he said against her ear.
Tears filled her eyes again. “Sorry for what?”
“Sorry things didn’t work out the way we planned.”
She didn’t have to ask what he was talking about—she already
knew. She was sorry too. More than he would ever know. She tried to pull out of
his embrace but he tightened his arm around her.
“Stay.” Not a command but a request.
She let her body relax against his and tried not to let her
mind wander. For far too long she had pushed him away. Time to let him in.
“Dev,” she whispered. “I need to tell you something.”
“Hmm?” he mumbled sleepily.
She looked over her shoulder. His eyes were shut but she prayed
he was listening.
“I never had the abortion.”
She held her breath as she waited for him to say something.
“Dev?”
She looked over her shoulder again as a soft snore left his
lips. A bitter laugh escaped her. He
would
be asleep when she finally
had the courage to tell him the truth.
She ran her hand across his cheek and whispered, “I promise
I will tell you again, when you’re awake.”
Then she shut her eyes and tried to forget the pain and
guilt she had carried for the last eight years.