Feral Sins (25 page)

“
That’s none of your business,” snapped Trey.

Dante held up a placating hand. “With all due respect, this is our business because you’re our Alpha male and, whether it’s temporary or not, she’s our Alpha female. Your relationship affects the rest of the pack.
And
we like her, we respect her, it’s in our nature to protect our females. Right now, there’s something wrong with Taryn and you need to do something.”

“
You know, I hear you all whining but look who’s
not
here. Taryn. If she had a problem with me, I’d know about it. If her wolf was riding her too hard she’d have come to me whether she wanted to or not.”

Dante laughed, but there was no humor in it. “Is that what you think? She’s not like the women you’re used to, Trey. She’s an alpha. Her wolf’s probably going just as crazy as yours is, but neither Taryn nor her wolf will ever come to you begging for some attention. Not ever.”

“
Maybe this isn’t about you,” said Trick, “maybe it’s something else eating at her, we don’t know. We’re worried about her and thought you might have some luck reaching her.”

The urge to find her was fierce now, but again Trey shrugged. “She could be just having a rough day -”

“
Christ, Trey,” interrupted Dante. “She was there for you when you were in a bad state. She reached you while your wolf was feral, and you’re going to ignore this?” He waved his hand dismissively at Trey and headed for the door. “Forget it. Hide some more, whatever.”

Looking both disappointed and disgusted, the three males walked out of his office and left Trey alone with his thoughts, thoughts that revolved around Taryn. He had noticed that she seemed off – her odd mood had unnerved his wolf and had him clawing at Trey, wanting to get to her. But, as always, Trey had acted against his wolf’s wishes and his own instincts and simply shrugged off his concern.

He wanted to do the same thing again now, but one thing was stopping him; as he had reached out through the pack link to sense her emotions, he’d hit a wall. She had somehow erected a big enough barrier around her that her own mate couldn’t reach her. A person didn’t do that unless a strong emotion was eating at them and they were trying desperately to hold themselves together.

With a determined stride he strolled out of the office and made his way to the living area where the majority of the noise was coming from. The fact that her scent was stronger the closer he got told him that that was where she was.

He entered the room. And stopped dead in his tracks. Across the room was Taryn balancing on one of the dining chairs as she used a feather duster to tackle non-existent cobwebs. But it wasn’t Taryn. Taryn was life and fire and sensuality and adorable sarcasm. She was not quiet or expressionless or withdrawn or robotic.

Most of the pack, even Greta, were gathered in the room on the sofa facing the T.V., but all eyes were fixed on Taryn. And all, even Greta, appeared concerned. So concerned that they only spared him a brief glance before turning their attention back to her.

Slowly he covered the space between them until he was beside the chair she was balanced on. She didn’t look at him. But she wasn’t ignoring him, he quickly realized. She was simply elsewhere in her mind. “Taryn?” he said softly. “Taryn, baby…you okay?” She double-blinked as if snapping out of a daze and then peered down at him. “Everything okay?” he asked again, really not liking the vacant look on her face.

Taryn nodded. “Fine.” Why, of all the times, did he want to speak to her now – now when the last person she needed to be around was him? The answer instantly came to her: Because someone had sent for him – if they hadn’t, he wouldn’t have bothered with her.

She went back to her dusting and Trey realized he had just been dismissed. “Come on, baby, come down from there.” No response. “I think we can safely say there isn’t a speck of dust left up there.” Nothing. Not even a sarcastic comment. His wolf was pacing again, not liking that she was obviously hurting. “How about you get down and we’ll go get a cup of coffee.”

Taryn wanted to hit him. Why was he talking to her like she was an insane person having an episode? A better question would be
why won’t he just leave?
And, as it happened, there was actually plenty of dust up here.

“
Taryn, how -”

“
Don’t you have something to do in your office?”

Trey winced. He deserved that, he knew he did. “I’m not moving from this spot until you tell me what’s wrong, baby,” he told her gently.

“
Good,” she said as she hopped down from the chair. “That means you’ll be a long way away from me because I’m about to leave the room.” She picked up the chair and carried it through the tunnel toward the kitchen, deliberately ignoring Trey who was trailing behind her. Tao wasn’t far behind him. She returned the chair to the dining table and put the duster back in the cupboard before going to the sink to wash her hands. Noticing there were a few mugs and dishes on the counter, she stacked them into the sink and filled it with hot soapy water.

“
What is it, baby? Tell me what’s wrong.”

That was now the fourth time he had called her ‘baby’. Cheeky bastard. If he thought he could block out her existence but then expect her to still confide in him he was seriously mistaken. Taryn would have told him that, but she didn’t want to argue with him, she just wanted him to go back to his hidey hole and leave her to grieve her mother in peace.

Taryn knew that her method of grieving wasn’t normal, that shutting off from the world around you while your body went on autopilot and you disappeared in your thoughts and memories was not good. It was the same state she had slipped into when her mom and Joey were in the accident. Although she had eventually dug her way out of it, she always tended to retreat whenever it was the anniversary of their death or either of their birthdays. It was just how she coped. The only way she could cope without screaming.

But having Trey around her – someone who frustrated and annoyed the hell out of her and had her wolf all messed up – was threatening the stability of her seemingly indifferent state. All that frustration and annoyance that she had been shoving aside was at risk of bursting out of her. If that happened, she would break. She couldn’t afford to do that.

“
Come on, leave those and come sit with me.”

Ignoring him in the hope that he would go away, Taryn continued scrubbing the dishes.

“
Taryn, you can’t tell me you’re not upset about something.”

Realising he was closer now, she warned in a low voice, “Back off, Trey.”

“
Back off?”

“
Yes.”

“
You want me to back off?” It was one thing when Trey assumed she just didn’t want to talk about whatever it was that was bugging her, but it was another thing altogether for her to want to freeze him out.

“
Yes, I want you to leave me alone. It shouldn’t be too hard. You do it easily enough any other time.”

“
Is that what this is about? You’re mad at me for not spending time with you?”

A short humorless laugh escaped her. “Yes because the world revolves around you.”

“
Then what is it?”

“
Like I said, just back off.”

“
I won’t back off. Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

Deep breaths
, she told herself. And those deep breaths actually worked. The tension didn’t leave her body, but it eased a little. Until hands wrapped around her middle as a large body pressed against her back and, making it even worse, he whispered into her ear ‘What’s wrong, baby?’

There was that word again! Something inside her snapped. Abruptly she spun, splashing water everywhere. Shocked, Trey jumped back out of the way. “Didn’t I tell you to back off? I’m pretty sure that’s what I said.”

He held his hands up in a calming gesture. “Taryn -”

“
Just stay away from me. That’s all I’m asking you to do. It’s something you do every single fucking day so
why
on this one day that I really need a little alone time am I suddenly of interest to you?!”

“
I just want to know what’s wrong.”

“
Well that’s tough shit, psycho boy, because I don’t want to talk to you!” Seeing that people were starting to gather was only making her worse. She suddenly felt like a cornered animal, like everyone was taking up her breathing space. Growling, she wiped her hands on the hand towel and then stalked toward the door. The crowd quickly parted, apparently not daring to intervene.

“
Where’re you going?”

“
Away from you!”

Trey jogged down the tunnel after her. “Oh no, you don’t get to shut me out like this. You’re my mate.”

She pivoted on the spot. “No, I’m not.”

“
What did you just say?” he asked softly but in a very dangerous tone.

“
We don’t count as mates if you only act like it when it suits you. But, hey, don’t get me wrong – if putting on act for other people is as far as it goes for you, then that’s fine. But don’t you
dare
throw that ‘you’re my mate’ shit at me when I won’t do what you want!”

He knew she was right, but the denial was automatic. “You
are
my mate, Taryn.”

“
Is it fun in La La Land? It must be, because you go there a lot.” Out of patience, she spun and began stalking away.

“
For God’s sake, Taryn, will you stop walking away from me.” Trey honestly wasn’t sure what happened…He’d reached out and placed his hand on her shoulder and then next thing he knew he was flat on his back on the ground and Taryn was snarling down at him. Damn the woman knew some good moves.

“
Back. Off
,” she growled. She looked up at the others who were slowly edging toward them, their expressions unsure. “
All
of you back off! I want to be
alone
!” Then she was striding out the main door, down the mountain, across the small open field and into the forest.

Many times she had gone on a leisurely walk or a run through here with Tao, but never had she gone as far as she intended to go today. Plenty of times she had heard the sound of the river in the distance, had known it was there and known that one day she would really need to go there for some alone time.

The River Kids – that was what her mom and Joey’s mom had called them. Some kids liked beaches, some kids liked swing parks, and she and Joey had liked rivers. No, they’d loved rivers. Loved the sounds, loved the surrounding wildlife, loved paddling in the shallow water and balancing on old tree branches that crossed the expanse of the river. There was something calming about them, she thought. Right now, she needed to calm the hell down.

On eventually reaching the river she found a bolder to perch herself on and took a deep, cleansing, calming breath. Again and again she filled her lungs with the fresh crispy forest air, letting it relax her. The familiar smells of wet earth and pine made her wolf ease a little within her. It was amazing how a place could relax you even as a barrage of sad memories hit you, mused Taryn.

A familiar guttural ‘tock’ sound snagged her attention and made her look to the tree beside her. “Hey LJ,” she said around the frog in her throat. Why the bird followed her around sometimes she had no idea, but that had been another thing that she and Joey used to marvel at together – the way birds were so at ease with her, almost attracted to her.

Hey Joe. I know that I shouldn’t always come to you whenever I need to talk to someone, that I should actually try confiding in people who are alive…but they’d be able to tell me to shut up. And in truth, you’re all I have.

As much as I really like these people here – with the exception of a few, including the evil and very senile version of Yoda – I still don’t feel like I can really talk to them. Not even to say ‘hey I miss my mom’. Actually, no, it’s not that I don’t feel like I can talk to them, it’s that I don’t want to start opening up to them and getting too comfortable here.
Snort
. Not that there’s really much chance of me getting comfortable with psycho boy around.

You know, I used to look at mated couples and I’d think how amazing it must be, that once you mated you’d never feel alone ever again because that person would become a part of you. I mean, I know that my mating with Trey doesn’t count in an emotional sense, but I still didn’t expect this feeling of being…trapped. I’m bound to someone who won’t even touch me socially, who deliberately avoids me – unless I want to be left alone, apparently I’m interesting to him then – and who has my wolf enthralled. And how is it that he’s able to get my wolf so enthralled with him anyway? That shouldn’t be possible. She’s such a traitor sometimes.