Feel the Heat: A Contemporary Romance Anthology (61 page)

The word was so final. So loud and accusatory in Jazz’s normally sweet voice. And then Harper bowed her head. Jazz had been a foster child.
Shit.

Stupid, selfish idiot, Harper Lee.

“We don’t know what we’re doing yet. We just got married. I never thought I’d be pregnant at twenty-three.”

“Right.”

Jazz’s voice was so soft. Harper wanted to rip her damn tongue out for hurting this girl. Even unintentionally.

She wanted to be excited like Jazz. She wanted to do cartwheels and be planning baby showers and rooms and figuring out names. And maybe she would be like that if they’d actually planned and talked about it.

But they hadn’t.

And she didn’t know how to feel. She couldn’t match up the emotions with the huge wall of fear and dozens of what ifs.

“I don’t know what to do,” Harper whispered.

“What has Deak said?”

Harper felt the slide of tears down her temples as she focused on the star-strewn sky above her. Anything not to break down again. Because she really didn’t know what Deacon wanted.

And she knew that was her fault.

He was taking his cues from her. And she was so completely a hot mess. Deacon only knew how to be the support guy. When had he actually ever demanded something from her?

Well, besides the caveman routine to get her to marry him. But that had been sweet and romantic in his way. And she’d loved that he’d taken charge like that. She’d never tell him that, of course. Secretly, she’d loved it. To know that he was so very certain.

It had helped make her more certain.

Maybe that’s what this whole situation was missing.

Her rock was flailing just as much as she was.

“I’m going to say something and it’s only because I love you guys so much. I know it’s none of my business. Not really.”

“I wouldn’t have called if I didn’t want your input, Jazz.”

“Good. Because you’re going to get it.” Jazz took a deep breath. “This might not be planned. And I know we’ve talked about this over a jug of sangria a few times…but this whole crazy whirlwind you have with Deacon. It might be just your thing. Plans have their place. And sometimes the cosmos, or fate, or God, whatever you want to call it…sometimes it has other plans.”

Harper set the hammock to swaying again. “Maybe it does. I never thought this crazy life would give me Deacon.”

“Maybe fate is giving you a family now because it’s time. Not the one you planned, but the one that is perfect for you in the end.” When Harper didn’t immediately respond, Jazz cleared her throat. “Just a thought.”

“I think I needed to hear that. Thanks, Jazz.”

“Whatever you decide to do, you’ve got me in your corner.”

“You’re pretty amazing, you know that?”

“You got that right, mama.”

“Oh, and Jazz?”

“Yeah?”

“I hate to ask—”

“You don’t even need to. Your secret’s safe with me until you’re ready to tell the masses.”

“Did I mention you’re amazing?”

“You may have.” She laughed, and the pure light of Jazz happy filtered through the phone.

Harper said her goodbyes and pressed her phone to her chest. She watched the stars for a while, rocking herself into a calm that she hadn’t felt in days. As the sky lightened and the stars lost their pinpoint luster, she finally stood and returned inside.

She slid into bed, immediately comforted by Deacon’s warm body. Instinctively, he curled around her, and their joined hands covered her stomach.

D
eacon cleaned
up the last of the pizza from the night before. Pouring the second mug of coffee had him feeling a little bit clearer. Harper hadn’t moved from the middle of their bed. She’d made a strange little cocoon in a patch of sun, practically pushing him out of bed.

He didn’t have the heart to wake her. Not when she hadn’t really slept the last few days. He was itchy to run out the last of the cobwebs in his head, but didn’t want her to wake alone.

So, he would wait.

And try not to be creepy guy watching his wife sleep.

At least try. He had yet to look away from her for more than five minutes. He was seriously going to need an hour with his heavy bag and weights when he got home or he was going to go out of his mind.

“Is that coffee?”

Deacon paused with his mug at his lips. “Maybe.”

“That very fine ass of yours should bring me over a cup.”

He went to the coffee maker and pulled down a teacup, fixing it the way she liked. He’d read that pregnant women should limit their caffeine intake, but he didn’t want to start the day off with them in the shutdown mode of the other day.

So…compromise. Small cup.

“You know, it shouldn’t be cute when you objectify me like that. And yet.” He crossed the room.

She peeked over the down comforter she’d confiscated sometime through the night. “Well, I wouldn’t drool so much if you didn’t work out like it was your job.”

“Want me to stop? Get fat and sloppy?”

“Knowing the fairness in this world, you’d probably just get skinny.”

He grinned down at her and held out her coffee. That was exactly what would happen. He’d been a skinny fuck until he discovered the gym at seventeen. But she didn’t need to know that.

Harper’s hand came out, snatching the cup, her blue eyes meeting his. “What if I do?”

He lowered himself to the side of the bed before his feet went out from under him. “Are we speaking hypotheticals here?” he asked carefully.

Harper looked down at her cup. “Deacon, what if I wanted this baby? Would you be on board with that?”

Yes.

Holy fuck, yes.

He couldn’t hear around the litany in his head. Hadn’t known that he’d wanted her to say those words so very badly.

“I would move heaven and earth to keep you happy.”

Harper rolled onto her knees and put her cup on the bedside table. She inched over until she was in front of him, her hands on his chest, her eyes direct and intense. “That’s not what I asked.”

“Yes.” His chest heaved. “Yes, I want this baby.” He leaned into her until their foreheads touched. “I never want to put pressure on you to do something you don’t want, but God, yes.”

From the moment she’d said
pregnant
he’d felt sucker punched. In the dark of that pier, with a storm coming up on them, he’d lost his breath and hadn’t quite ever gotten it back. The idea of a family had been a nebulous one. In the hazy future. Every day since she’d told him, it got clearer.

Amazingly, Harper’s arms came up and around his neck. She caught his mouth in a desperate kiss. Again he tasted tears. He pulled her back. “Hey, hey, hey.” He cupped her face. Tears starred her lashes and dripped down her cheeks. But there was a smile there.

A huge smile that had been missing for days.

“How the hell are we going to do this?”

He brushed his nose against hers. “Together. Just like we do everything else.” Someday she’d believe that without him having to convince her. “We’ll figure out a game plan. You’re not alone anymore. You’ll never be alone again.”

“All I could think about was how hard it was going to be. I didn’t even let myself think about a baby. And last night, all I could think about was the baby part. Of course a crazy conversation with Jazz helped too.”

He brushed her hair away from her face. “You called Pix?”

She nodded. “God, you should have heard how excited she was. She scared the crap out of me talking about how big you were and how big the baby might be.”

Deacon’s eyebrows snapped down. “Jesus.” Harper was tiny as hell. “I—”

“Any clue how big you were when you were born? Ballpark figure.”

Deacon scratched his head. “Uh…I think I was nine pounds maybe?”

“Of course you were.”

“But we might have a girl.” In his head all he could see was a girl. “Your hair and smile, my dimples. She’d rule the world.”

She laughed, swiping away tears that were still free-flowing down her cheeks.

“Are you sure?” He hadn’t meant to blurt out the question, but they’d run the gamut of emotions for the last few days. He didn’t want regret. Not when the happy high faded and things got hard. Because it was going to be hard.

“I’m sure about you. I’m sure about us. I’m sure I’m going to be a maniac,” she said with a hiccupping laugh. “I love you, Deacon. Everything about us has been in fast forward and it’s scary as hell, but maybe that’s what makes us work.” She tucked a wavy lock of his hair behind his ear. “If the world let me overthink everything, look at what I’d miss.”

He hauled her into his arms, kissing her until the tears were sealed in with happy laughter. He rolled them back onto the bed that smelled like peaches and cocoa butter. Into the bright sunlight that lit up the white so it was almost blinding. He rolled under her, dragging her up to straddle his chest, her knees jammed under his arms. He lifted her shirt to see the tanned expanse of her flat stomach. She held the shirt up as his fingertips feathered over her sides, while his thumbs stroked the downy smooth skin on either side of her belly button.

So many changes were coming. He’d freely handed this woman his heart. He thought that had been an incredible feat. And now he’d found out he had so much more waiting in reserves. There was an incredible love growing inside him for someone who hadn’t even arrived yet.

Harper covered his hand, dragged his palm up to her breast to cup it. The heat from her nipple instantly pushed any thoughts of babies to the back of his mind. He swiped his thumb over the tight tip, then tugged just the way she liked.

And as he’d discovered, her hyperactive sensitivity brought things to another level. Only this time he knew what to expect and just how to take care of her. She sighed, her head tipped back as he continued the soft caress. He pushed her shirt higher, burrowed under to replace his hand with his mouth. Hot silk skin came alive under his touch. He circled her nipple, but avoided the tight center. He moved from one to the other, taking his time to taste her everywhere except that exquisite tip. She growled out his name as she gripped the headboard with her free hand. “You’re killing me.”

He finally sucked her deep into his mouth, taking as much as he could. He pushed up her shirt from the back until she helped him and flipped it over her head. She inched down his chest, but he wouldn’t let her pull away just yet. The little sounds in her throat were driving him crazy.

He caught her gaze as he let her nipple pop from his mouth. The blue of her eyes were a mere sliver. Her pupils were wide open, drowning in lust. A siren’s call couldn’t have lured him more. But he didn’t want that today. He wanted the playful Harper full of laughter.

He slowed his kisses, cupped her breasts gently as he blew lightly on the tight tips. She closed her eyes, his name a long, slow groan. She rested her forearms next to his head until her breasts pressed into his chest. She sighed as he cupped her hips, his hands sliding lower to her ass.

“I’ll tell you one thing.” She wiggled lower until she straddled his straining cock. “This increased libido thing. Awesome,” she said with a purr.

He ground his molars together. “You’re killing me.”

“I think you can handle it.”

Oh, he’d handle it. Morning, noon, and night if he needed to. When she pushed at her panties, fumbling to get out of them, he lifted his hips to get rid of his shorts. Without warning, she guided him inside her. He slammed his head back against the pillows, watching as she took all of him in one sure stroke. She levered herself up, her hips undulating as she rode him slowly.

He bracketed her hips, but let her set the pace. Sunshine sex was officially his new favorite kind of sex. His grip tightened as her tempo increased. She arched her back, tipping her head back in abandon. He glided one hand up to cup her breast, plucking at the tip until he heard the revved growl that told him she was close. He could have easily let her go right then. She was so damn close that it would only have taken a light stroke against her clit and she’d have shattered above him.

But he didn’t want it to end quite yet. He rolled them both, never missing a thrust. He wanted her mouth, wanted her taste inside of him and around him in the blast of sunshine with her laughter. He rolled his hips, laughing when her eyes went wide and she hooked an arm around his neck. She dragged him down as he went deeper then shallow.

“You freaking tease,” she said on a shaky breath.

“You got it. I missed you, Harper. I don’t want this to end yet.”

“Are you kidding? We’ve got two more days of this.” Her voice broke as he slipped his fingers in between them.

“Two more days,” he panted. “We’ll kill each other.”

“Honeymoon reboot. I’m all for it.”

“Christ, yes.” He hooked her knee over his hip and drove down into her. “God, you feel too good.”

Her nails bit into his back. “If you stop again, I’ll never made those strawberries again.”

“Now that’s just mean.” He smiled down at her and circled her clit with his thumb until she shook, until she screamed, until his name was a hoarse cry. When he couldn’t hold back any longer, he rode out her last orgasm and let go. When her legs slid limply to the bed and he managed to catch his breath, he couldn’t hold back a wheezing laugh.

“I should ask why you’re laughing, but my thigh is still shaking from that last whopper of an orgasm. So, I gotta say, I just don’t care.”

He dropped to the bed beside her, his fingers sliding over her, unable to stay away from her.

She moaned and tried to curl into herself. “Ever heard of the term
open nerve
?”

He gentled his touch. She was slick with him and her combined. He lowered his mouth to her breast, sucking lightly as he teased her to the brink again. Her release was long and sweet. The kind that had started on a bus with two people fumbling into love. And now the love had created something new and exciting. He took a mental snapshot of the day. Sunshine and Harper. Love and forever. Wife and the future mother of his child.

He didn’t know exactly how they’d get to the end of this new road, but it was the start of something amazing—that much he knew.