Read February (Calendar Girl #2) Online
Authors: Audrey Carlan
“
Putain oui
” he said through clenched teeth, his jaw working overtime. I nibbled and bit at his nipple until it was dark and erect then moved over to its mate and did the same. Alec’s fingers dug into my hips signaling his need to be taken harder. I lifted back up, flung my hair back behind me, and rode him…hard. Every press down I ground into his pelvis sending sparks of excitement through my sex where I clamped down using my internal muscles, giving him as good as I’d gotten.
He spoke in rapid French. I couldn’t understand any of it. He sat up, pushed with his feet until he was at the headboard. He leaned my body back and physically slid me on and off his cock. The French started back up again as he watched himself enter my body over and over. As much as I wanted this to be for him, I couldn’t help that he was winding me up again. My body was coiled tight like a snake, and he knew it, too. He leaned his mouth forward and sucked hard on my nipples making them dark red raspberries until he couldn’t take it anymore.
Finally, his head hit the headboard and I grasped the top of the headboard for leverage. That’s when I took us both over the edge, barreling into a sea of sweet nothingness, the only sounds our strained breathing as we cried out in mutual release, my center putting a lockdown around his shaft the likes of which I’d never thought possible before. He held me close still pressing his hips up from beneath me, rubbing out the very last tremors of pleasure.
We stayed that way, me strung up on his cock, sitting in his lap, my hands still hanging onto the headboard. His hands moved up and down my back, arms, thighs as if he needed to touch me, to believe I was really there. I could understand it. When you leave yourself like that, and the pleasure is so extreme, you need something repetitive to bring you back.
Little by little our heartbeats calmed down, and I tucked my arms behind his back and held him close. He didn’t let me go, either, preferring to touch and kiss me wherever he could reach. It was nice—really nice if I was being honest with myself.
For a moment, it reminded me of Wes. Sweet, beautiful, down to Earth, Wes. The one man, the only man I think I could ever truly fall in love with. I took a harsh breath and prevented the tears from coming. I wasn’t cheating. I. Was. Not. Cheating. Even though I kept telling myself, there still was a hint of guilt hovering over me like a machete ready to lop of my head.
“What’s the matter?” Alec asked pushing me back so he could see my eyes.
I shook my head. These were not thoughts I ever planned on sharing with Alec or anyone for that matter. “Just relaxing against you,” I kissed his nose then nuzzled him there. “We should clean up, take care of the um…” I looked down and Alec’s gaze followed.
“Ah, the condom, yes, I should do that.” He lifted me off and then got up pulled off the condom and tied it at the end before setting it into a tissue and putting it in a wastebasket. I imagine the last thing he wanted to do was go down the stairs to the bathroom though that’s exactly what I needed to do. I rolled to my back and groaned. “What is it?”
“I have to pee,” I mumbled and he laughed. Before I could say anything, he lifted me up from the bed in his favorite princess hold and carried me down the stairs to the bathroom. Once in front of the toilet, he set me down and moved out the door.
“I’ll make us a snack,
oui
?”
“
Oui
,” I responded and he chuckled before shutting the door. I took care of my business quickly and then grabbed for the robe on the back of the door. It was a lush deep burgundy color that felt like squishy awesomeness over my bare skin. I didn’t want to hop out there completely naked.
I hopped my way to the kitchen. He had a tray of items in one hand and a couple glasses of wine in the other. Still, he was bare-assed naked, and I greatly enjoyed the view. His tattoo slithered along his body and that reminded me how much I wanted to trace it…with my tongue.
“
Un moment
,” he said as he jaunted up the stairs to the loft bedroom. Before I knew it, he was rushing down the stairs, his dick flapping in the wind. I giggled as he made his way over to me. “What?” he asked a lovely smile adorned his face. When he was happy, he was less intense artist and more friendly Frenchie. Though I thoroughly enjoyed both very much.
Once he reached me, he pulled me into his arms and carried me back up the stairs. “I see you found my robe,” he said with a mock stern voice. Then he set me on my good foot, his hands going to the tie. “That is not acceptable. I told you,
ma jolie
, I like to see your naked body.” I let him remove the robe then I crawled over the bed and got comfortable. He set the tray in front of us and handed me a glass of wine. The rich berry flavor drifted down my throat and settled nicely in my belly. The tray he brought had some salami, tiny blocks of cheddar cheese, green grapes and a bunch of strawberries.
My stomach growled while I scoured all my options then settled on a chunk of cheese. It paired well with my wine. “Thank you.” I pulled the sheet up into my chest.
“For what?”
I picked up a strawberry and held it close. “For this, for tonight, painting me, sharing your work with me. I’m really honored to be here with you.”
His hand came up and held my cheek. “You are my muse, Mia. You were meant to be here.”
Chapter 5
Once we finished our meal, we messed around a bit more, kissing, caressing each other, getting to know one another better. After a deep kiss, I leaned on his chest and hugged him.
“Do you realize you barely say anything in English when you’re fucking?”
Alec’s body tightened before he responded. “I do not fuck,
chérie
. I told you, I make love to you, to your body.” His tone was drop dead serious and I couldn’t grasp why. “And I speak in French because you make me so far gone, I lose myself in you, in your sexy body.”
I grinned saucily giving him my best smile. Then I thought about the fucking versus love making for a moment. “But doesn’t that get tricky, the love making? Doesn’t everyone fall in love with you when you do that?”
He held me tight and slid a hand up to my bicep and squeezed. “I would hope so.”
“Wait a minute; you
want
me to fall in love with you?” I lifted off his chest and looked hard into his eyes. They were so pretty.
“Of course, don’t you?” his face contorted into one of bafflement.
I shook my head hard letting my hair fly. “No, not even. I want to have
fun
with you. Then after, I’m going to be with another client who I may or may not have sexual relations with.”
“As will I.” He looked utterly confused, which said a lot, because I was pretty sure I was going off the deep end without a paddle.
I pushed my hair out of my face and behind me. “Okay, let me get this straight. You want me to fall in love with you, yet you know I’m going to leave and be with someone else. Do I have this right so far?” He nodded and smiled innocently. “And you are going to fall in love with me, yet when I leave, you’re going to have this same awesome sex with another girl.”
“Awesome sex?” he grinned. Fucking pig. All men think with their dicks I swear. This proved it. I smacked him on the chest.
“Pay attention.”
“I cannot pay attention with you speaking of love and sex, two things I believe always go together beautifully, I might add. We should bring them together again right now.” He pulled my body over his. He was already hard. For a moment I balked. Hard again? Holy shit, this man was virile. He gripped my ass and pressed his hips to mine. “Are we done talking,
ma jolie
. I want to make love to you again.”
“No!” I sat up straddling his hips and crossed my hands over my chest. None of this made a lick of sense. “I don’t understand you.”
His eyes narrowed. “What is to understand? I make love to you. I fall in love with you a bit more each day.”
I rolled my eyes. “Okay, let’s continue with that. You fall in love with me more each day, yet you’re okay with letting me go?”
“If you would like to stay, I would be amicable,” he said deadpan.
Arrrgggghh! “You would be amicable? I don’t understand you.” my hand flew into the air like a maniac swatting at flies that weren’t there.
He pulled me down to his chest then rolled us over so he was on top. With one leg he kicked out the good one of mine and pressed into my hips. His large erection rubbed enticingly along my moistening flesh. I took a deep breath trying not to let it get to me. It didn’t work.
He kissed me softly. “Let me make you understand,
oui
?”
“Please!”
“The French make love. I make love. I have to have some feeling for you in order to truly make love to you,
oui
?”
“
Oui,
” I repeated. That made sense. The part of us full on falling in love then willy-nilly bailing on one another, did not make sense. As a matter of fact, it’s what was so hard about me leaving Wes. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, I had feelings for the guy, and now, Frenchie here wanted me to have feelings for him—love type feelings— which I didn’t want to have.
He started talking again. “Therefore, I must love you a little to want to be with you in such a way. Yet, I can still love you and set you free. But you will always carry my love with you when you go, and forever. That piece of my love is yours for as long as you live.”
Gotta admit, that was pretty beautiful. The way he thought of having sex and making love, how it tied to the woman and the relationship he had with each of them.
“So, we’re going to love one another forever, only we’re not committing to one another in the way a married couple or even a boyfriend and girlfriend do,” I confirmed.
“
Oui
. Exactly,
ma jolie
! You’ve got it. My commitment to you is to love you wholly for our time, and that will stay with you. And I will take your love with me. Then forever, we will both know that this time was built on trust, love, and friendship.” He paused then kissed me softly. “Nothing more in life is needed.”
My eyes misted over and a tear trickled down the side of my cheek at the truth of what he’d said. Alec wiped it away. “May I love you now?” His words were simple but struck deep.
“Yes, Alec. I’d very much like you to love me,” I said through the lump that formed in my throat. And that’s what he did, loved me, all through the night or at least until I passed out. It was exactly what I needed to get through what had happened earlier in the loft, as well as the guilt that was building about Wes.
Alec and I had a mutual agreement to love one another as friends, to treat each other with respect. We would enjoy one another’s bodies and minds for the time I was there, and when it was done, it was done. We’d still care for one another and have a love that was exclusively ours that we could keep in a box inside our memories and revisit if we needed to. There was something achingly perfect about that. Right then, I vowed that I wouldn’t try to prevent myself from caring for each client. I would allow myself to care in my own special way. Only it wouldn’t be the “I’m in love with you forever way.” Forever was sacred, something that would present itself when the time was right, with the right person.
I thought back to Wes and how much I missed him. This situation with Alec gave me new insight into my relationship with Wes. Showed me how I spent the entire month I was with Wes trying not to love him. Protecting myself and my heart from ever feeling those things. Except it didn’t work, because I do love Wes. In my own way. And I think he loves me too. Only with him, I’m not sure it wouldn’t be the forever kind of love. That thought cemented why it was important for me to leave when I did. I can safely say that we were both honest with one another, cared deeply, and if it’s meant to be a forever kind of love, we have time to cultivate that.
If it’s meant to be.
Until then, I would enjoy my Frenchman and all the experiences I was supposed to have while I was there and for the remainder of the year escorting.
***
The next day when I made my way down to the loft, it was once again silent. I was beginning to see a pattern here. He took pictures one day, and the next day, when he did the painting, he released his staff so he could work alone. As I made my way further into the loft, I heard a hauntingly beautiful piece of music. The lilting voice and intense piano notes echoed off the walls as a woman’s tentative lyrics weaved through the chords of the piano. She was almost speaking in a whisper yet still singing. It was utterly disturbing in its beauty. Then strings entered the mix. I closed my eyes taking it into my heart and soul. Remembering this moment for what it was. Graceful, vulnerable, everything I needed.
Click
I was startled and opened my eyes to see Alec standing in front of me a camera in his hand.
“I couldn’t help myself. You were too precious, soaking in the light of grace. I had to capture it.”
I tilted my head and grinned. “Did you get what you need?” I asked with a touch of sarcasm.
“Did you?” his eyebrow quirked. Always trying to teach me a lesson, my Frenchie.
I took a breath and scanned the floor choosing to leave it at that.
“Come, there is much to do.” Alec turned on a heel and strode over to our space in the loft.
I hobbled over and took my seat. I gasped as I stared once more at my image. Only this time it was the wide canvas. One half had my picture silk screened, the other, he painted. He must have gotten up in the middle of the night after I passed out once round two of him “loving” me was finished.
“How...?” I was incapable of saying anything else as I looked at myself on the canvas. It was me facing the image he had photographed yesterday. My hand out, my forehead near the painting, only he painted my hand touching the heart on the photographed side. The way he mixed medias so uniquely was unlike anything I’d witnessed before. This is why he was a world-renowned artist and people paid obscene amounts of money for his art. And I was part of that, a big part. His muse.