FEARLESS: The King Series, Book One (14 page)

The idea of spending more time with Ms. Lacusta
and
Nell (whom I was certain was active in this club) really didn’t sound like fun to me; in fact, it sounded like a nightmare. But I really couldn’t afford to offend this teacher.  Not only did she control my grade, she spooked me for reasons I couldn’t explain. I wondered how I could delicately decline. I decided on my old fall back: parental authority.

“I would have to check with my parents first. They’re very strict about my activities. Thank you, though, for the invitation,” I added.

Ms. Lacusta gazed at me for a moment, and then she merely nodded. “Of course. You’ll let me know, then.” She swept up to the front of the classroom and took her normal, ready-to-begin-class stance.

I breathed a careful and quiet sigh of relief. I was absolutely sure that I wanted nothing to do with Ms. Lacusta’s club, and I was fairly certain that my parents would back me up if I presented it to them the right way. They had never forced me to participate in anything, and I doubted they would begin now.

I wondered suddenly if Ms. Lacusta’s invitation had been prompted by Nell’s absence. The weird relationship between teacher and student gave me the creeps, the way Nell stared at Ms. Lacusta, with an odd mixture of awe and cunning, and how often Ms. Lacusta’s gaze rested on Nell.

I caught Casey and Liza exchanging furtive glances, and in my anxiety I heard Casey thinking,
Can’t believe she did that… Nell is going to be livid. Marica knows she hates that girl… do I  tell Nell? If I don’t, Liza might…  Nell will think I’m keeping secrets… so nasty when she’s annoyed…

It was interesting to hear how Nell’s closest friends thought of her. There was more fear than affection, reminding me of the hypocrisy Michael and I had discussed earlier. I didn’t exactly feel sorry for Nell, but it made me wonder about her whole group. Perhaps even sadder than having no friends at all was knowing that the people around you were motivated by something other than friendship.

Michael was sitting outside again today, and I joined him, shaking my head in quiet resignation as I looked at the trays of food. He greeted me with the smile that lit up his face, grabbed my hand and gave it a light squeeze.

“Hey,” he said, looking up at me. “How was your morning?”

“It was good,” I replied, realizing that it had been. “Nell isn’t here today, so that is one excellent piece of news… you don’t think she left for good, do you?”

Michael laughed. “No, I don’t think she did. Even Nell takes a day off every now and then. I’m glad you got a break.”

“Me, too,” I agreed with heartfelt fervor. “And not only that, I think I might be on my way to another first in my life.”

“What’s that?” He took a big bite of the pasta on the plate in front of us.

“I think I might be making a new friend, all on my own. Not that I don’t love Anne,” I hastened to assure him. “I do, and she’s been so terrific to me. But she’s your friend too, and for me to actually meet someone on my own makes me feel good. I sat next to Cara today in French, and we talked a little bit. I almost asked her to sit with us at lunch, but I wasn’t sure if we’d need some privacy.” I shook my head sadly as Michael leaned toward me in a mock leer. “C’mon, you
know
what I mean. I thought you might have some news about Amber.”

“I knew what you meant… but you can’t blame a guy for hoping,” he sighed, then sobered. “I’m glad to hear about Cara. She seems nice. She’d probably be a good friend for you, I think. And actually, I did get a chance to talk with Amber.”

My eyes widened. “Really? You did? I thought you were going to chicken out on that. I’m amazed.”

“Chicken out?” Michael’s voice raised in disbelief.  “That’s crazy. I told you I’d talk to her if I got the opportunity, and, well, I got the opportunity. She came into the library when I was there for independent study, and I managed to get her by herself.”

“That must have been interesting,” I commented.

“Oh, it was,” he agreed. “I had to turn on the charm.”

“Ahhhh…” I nodded. “I see. So she never stood a chance.”

“Nope,” he said smugly. “Never. Fate threw us together and gave us a study hall monitor who couldn’t care less if we talked, as long as we were quiet about it. So we did. Talk, I mean.”

“And…?” I prompted.

“And… apparently this friendship with Nell isn’t as new as we thought. Amber says Nell has been talking to her, asking her to sit with them at lunch, since the beginning of school. I asked her why on earth she’d want to be friends with Nell, after all the years of torture. She just kind of shrugged and looked—I don’t know, almost guilty. She said Nell explained a lot to her, and now she understands more. And she said Nell can be almost sweet.”

I choked on the fries I was nibbling. “
Sweet?
Are you kidding me? Are we talking about the same girl?”

“Yeah, I kind of felt the same way, but I covered it up. Amber says Nell has introduced her to all her friends and now, after a few years of being pretty lonely, Amber has friends. And I thought you’d find this interesting, too—Nell has gotten Amber involved in some club that your Chem. teacher runs.”

I was surprised, but I shouldn’t have been. Whatever Nell was up to, I had a strong feeling that it involved this club.

“Isn’t that a coincidence?” I remarked to Michael. “Ms. Lacusta invited me to join her chemistry club today.”

Michael raised his eyebrows. “And what did you tell her?”

I gave him an innocent look. “Why, I have to ask my parents, of course. I would never commit to something without checking it out with them.”

“Of course,” he nodded. “Good idea. Will they back you up?”

“Oh, I think so. I’m not joining their cozy little group, don’t worry. Ms. Lacusta creeps me out big time.”

Michael frowned. “You think she’s involved in this, somehow?”

I shook my head. “Not sure. But speaking of coincidences, I don’t think it’s one that Ms. Lacusta asked me about the club today, when Nell was absent.”

“Do you think she’s afraid of Nell?”

“Not afraid, no, but maybe she thought Nell would throw a fit if she heard her inviting me, and she wanted to avoid…” I searched for the right word. “Unpleasantness.”

“Got it,” Michael said, nodding again.

“So did you ask Amber about anything going on with Nell that’s scaring her?” This was the real crux of the matter, in my opinion. If Amber was stupid enough to want to pal around with a girl who used to make her life miserable, that was her business. It was her safety that concerned me, not her sanity.

“I tried to hint around as much as possible.  She starting getting real uneasy when I asked her about the chemistry club and what they do.  I said that Nell strikes me as someone who’d be dangerous with chemicals, and Amber—well, she got a little freaky.  She told me I didn’t know what I was talking about, and then she blew my cover.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, bewildered.

“She said she knew Nell despises my girlfriend—that was her word, ‘despises’. She said she didn’t know what your problem was, but Nell said you were making trouble in Chemistry class. She said you blamed Nell for things that were your own fault. I couldn’t get her to give me specifics, and then she just clammed up.”

“So do you think I’m crazy?” I asked him. “Now that you’ve talked to Amber?”

Michael shook his head. “I never did think you were crazy,” he reminded me. “But I could tell something’s going on with Amber. When I asked her if Nell would have a problem with her talking with me—because I’m your boyfriend—” even in the midst of this, he smiled at those words,“—she got very upset. She said Nell would never believe me, that Nell trusted her, and she started shaking. And then she just got up and walked out of the room.”

I shuddered. “So she does seem to be afraid of Nell. That fits into place.”

Michael nodded. “Seems to.” He finished the last morsel of food on our trays. “I think we made a good start today. No matter how it ended, I hope she knows that she has someone she can talk to now, if things with Nell get too intense.”

“She’s not the only one who’s living in fear of Nell. I picked up some interesting tidbits from Casey in Chemistry. I get the feeling that Nell’s is a reign of terror, not of love.”

Michael frowned; something was troubling him, but it wasn’t anything he was going to share with me at the moment. He stood, stretching, and I watched him stack our trays. Lunch was almost over, and I was actually looking forward to History today, knowing Cara would be there and Nell would
not
. It was shaping up to be a decent afternoon.

Michael had to work at the nursery that afternoon, so our ride home was brief. As I slid out of the car, he caught my arm and pulled me back, cupping his hand around the back of head and drawing me closer for a brief kiss.

“I’m glad you’re feeling better today,” he murmured.  “Wish I could come in with you… are you sure you don’t want to come over to the nursery with me?”

I smiled against his lips but shook my head. “First, my mom is still a little jumpy after yesterday. She’s going to insist on an after-school nap, I just know it. And second, you know I’d only be a distraction if I went home with you. That’s not fair to your parents. I want them to
like
me, not resent me.”

Michael chuckled softly. “No way they could resent you. They might harass
me
, but they think you’re perfect.” He caressed my neck and rubbed his nose against mine. “Of course, I tend to agree with them.”

The glow of happiness and contentment that always appeared when I was with Michael surrounded me. I could sit in the car with him all afternoon… but reluctantly I pulled back. “You’ve got to go to work,” I reminded him.

He sighed. “I know. I’m going. I’ll call you tonight, okay?”

“Yeah…” I moved to the door again, and then turned back. “I haven’t forgotten that you owe me a conversation from yesterday. About the occult in King, and what you didn’t want to say when we were out.”

Michael nodded, his smile fading slightly. “I haven’t forgotten either. Can it wait until this weekend? You could come out to the nursery with me, and we could talk there. I’d rather it happen out of town.”

“Now you’re scaring me,” I said.

“Nothing to worry about. I’ll talk to you tonight,” he repeated. “Have a good nap.”

I rolled my eyes at him as he drove awa
y
.

My mind was racing, and I tried to calm down. Where would Amber be right now? And would she believe me even if I did find her?

The first thought that leapt into my mind was: find Michael. He’d know what to do. Where would he be? What class did he have this period?

And why was it so dark if we were in the middle of the school day?

With a jerk and cry, I came awake, still breathless, my heart racing. It was a dream. Just a dream. But it had seemed so real. I tried to remember what I could of the content, beyond the terror that had overtaken me near the end. There was something to do with Amber. Somehow in the dream I knew she was in grave danger, and no one could help her but me.  I recalled feeling helpless as I tried to figure out what to do.

The bedside clock read 3:17. I took a deep breath, closed my eyes and tried to stop the shaking in my arms.

Could my subconscious be trying to tell me something? It wasn’t strange that I would be dreaming about the Amber situation, given that Michael and I had spent a good part of the day discussing her. But what I had dreamed seemed not so much a memory or the jumbled flotsam of the day as it did… something else.

I was wide awake and not a little spooked. Jumping out of bed, I turned on the bedside light, which instantly comforted me a little. My room was exactly as it should be, everything in place. I grabbed my laptop from the desk and climbed back under the covers. It was too quiet, I decided, so I found some headphones in the drawer next to my bed, plugged them into my computer and flicked the music onto shuffle. Perfect.

The music reminded me of the chant that I had heard coming from Nell’s head, right before the scary stuff started. Michael had suggested it might be helpful to know more about it, and I hadn’t followed up on that yet. I opened the Internet to my favorite search engine, and then paused. What to enter? Weird chanting? I thought about it for a few seconds before I typed in, “Chanting and the occult”.

Over two hundred thousand options appeared. My eyes widened. Most of the links were new age information pieces, which of course it might have been… maybe Nell was into crystals and all that? Somehow it didn’t seem likely to me. These seemed to be mostly innocuous articles about lightness and goodness and peace, and none of those applied to Nell.

About halfway down the first page, I saw a simple line reading “The Occult and Music/Chanting”. I clicked on it, scrolled down through several pages of musical history, skimming it to see that nothing related to what I had heard. Finally, a line caught my eye:
Chanting can be an integral part of spell casting and the working of magiks. Most spell chanting is performed in the ancient languages such as Latin, although there has been a recent movement toward using a primitive Egyptian as well as other African tribal tongues. Some smaller sects utilize their own mother tongues, including Russian, Greek or Romanian.

Something clicked. I was sure that Nell had not been thinking of Latin chanting; I knew it wasn’t Egyptian or African, and I didn’t think it sounded Greek. I thought Russian or Romanian might be stronger possibilities.

I copied that part of the article and pasted it into a blank email. Above it, in bold print, I added,

Found this online. Maybe it was Russian or Romanian? Any thoughts? See you in a few hours.

Love,

Tas

I typed Michael’s address in the TO: section and hit send.

I closed the computer and put it next to the bed. Sleep was what I needed now, even if I was still a little jumpy. I knew the sleepiness would end up hitting me in mid-morning if I didn’t catch at least another two hours. So I burrowed my face into my pillow and wrapped the blanket around my shoulder, up by my ears.

But I left the bedside light burning. Just in case.

When I got into the car the next morning, Michael was looking at me speculatively.

“Insomnia?” he inquired.

I sighed. “Bad dream, which led to about an hour of missed sleep. So I made the most of it.”

“Well, as nice as it was to wake up to an email from you, I’m sorry about your bad dream. At least you accomplished something while you were up.”

“What did you think my information?” I asked.

“Hard for me to say, since I didn’t hear the chant.”

I frowned slightly. “I wonder if there’s any way for me to hear Romanian and Russian, to see if either sounds familiar.”

Michael’s face brightened. “I bet if you searched ‘Romanian’ under video or audio, you’d find some site in that language and could listen to it.”

“Good idea. I’ll check after school today.”

“What was the dream about?”

I blew out a breath. “Amber, Nell… bad scary stuff. I was trying to find you, but it was night. Really dark.” I shuddered a little, remembering. “I knew if I found you, I’d be okay.”

He reached over to grip my hand briefly. “You’d be right.”

We were both quiet for the rest of the ride.

At my locker, I pulled out my books while Michael crammed for a History test.

“I can never keep the order of the British monarchs in line,” he was complaining to me, when abruptly I felt a change in the air around us.

“Michael.” I knew the voice, and it seemed my nightmare was suddenly upon us. Nell stood behind me, turned to face Michael. She was wearing jeans that hugged her body, and a light black shirt. Her hair fell straight down her back, and her odd blue eyes were icily livid.

Michael didn’t move from where he leaned against the lockers next to mine. “Nell,” he returned, gazing at her levelly.

“I was very disturbed last night when I spoke to some of my friends.” Nell kept her own voice modulated, even as her face clearly displayed anger. “Apparently you were harassing one of them.”

Michael made a show of innocence and ignorance. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I’m talking about Amber,” Nell all but hissed. “You cornered her in the library yesterday and intimated some not very pleasant things about me.”

“I did talk with Amber yesterday in the library, but what we said really had little to do with you. I’ve known Amber for as long as you have, remember. And maybe
my
memory of the past is even a little clearer than Amber’s.”

Nell regarded him steadily for a moment. “What happened in elementary school was a long time ago, Michael. And I wouldn’t expect you to understand the female mind and how it works. Amber and I are past all that, and we’re friends now. Would you take that away from her?” For the first time, Nell shifted her gaze to me. “Is this a way to strike back at me for what your—your
girlfriend
—” she snarled the word, “—imagines I’ve done to her? What’s the matter, Tasmyn, can’t you fight your own battles?”

Up to this point, Michael hadn’t moved from his relaxed position. Now he stood up and moved closer to me, so that he towered over Nell.

“Leave Tasmyn alone, Nell,” he instructed tightly. “I don’t know why you’re threatened that I talked with Amber yesterday, but Tas didn’t have anything to do with it. And as for fighting her own battles, if I really thought that, do you think I would have let you get away with half of what you have? Tasmyn is very capable of standing up for herself.”

Nell’s withering eyes swept over both of us. “As long we understand each other. Stay away from my friends.” She pinned me with her glare. “
All of them
. And mind your own business.” She turned and disappeared into the crowd moving on the sidewalk.

I slowly closed my locker and looked at Michael with wide eyes. “What was
that
?” I asked in a whisper.

He gave me a half-smile and took my hand as we began walking. “I think we rattled some cages yesterday. Nell is feeling just a tad insecure, I’d say.”

I shivered. “Is that it? It felt more like an attack than a defensive move.”

We stopped at the corner, where I had to turn toward French and Michael had to cross the grass to his classroom. He dropped my hand and stroked my hair back away from my face.

“Remember the most dangerous creature is a cornered animal. Give Nell lots of room today, okay?” When I opened my mouth, possibly to protest, he put a finger on my lips. “I know you can take care of yourself. But I’ll feel better if I also know you’re not going to be in any form of danger this morning. I’m not sure anymore what Nell is or isn’t capable of doing, and I don’t really feel like putting it to the test today.” He replaced his finger with his lips and lightly brushed a kiss onto my mouth. “See you at lunch.”

A light rain began to fall about mid-morning, so I knew that we would be eating inside today. Because I felt I needed a little relief from the whole Nell and Amber drama, I made a point of inviting Cara to eat lunch with us. We had just a minute to talk at the end of class, since I just barely made it into my seat before the first bell rang and Madame taught right up to the closing bell. Cara brightened at my invitation and promised to see me in the cafeteria.

Nell had returned to her ignoring-me mode in Chemistry. Her back was stiff and straight, and her head never turned. Ms. Lacusta was lecturing again, and although I noticed her eyes rest curiously on me as well as on Nell several times, she didn’t directly address me at all. I was relieved. I had the sense that when Nell warned me away from
all
of her friends, she had been including our Chemistry teacher. A little weird, but I was beginning to realize that was the way Nell’s mind worked.

When I arrived at lunch, slightly breathless from rushing, I found Michael sitting at our regular table, with the requisite two trays overflowing with food. Everyone else was already there, too, including Cara, who was sitting across from Michael. When she saw me, she gave a wave and then, oddly, flushed a little.

Senses prickling, I slid onto the bench next to Michael. He smiled his greeting, leaning in to kiss my cheek and whisper in my ear. “This morning go okay?”

I smiled in return and nodded. “Uneventful.” I turned to Cara. “I’m glad to see you found the table! I always get to lunch later than everybody else. Mrs. Cook keeps us until the bitter end.”

Cara nodded, and I could feel something coming from her—was that relief? I wasn’t sure. “I have her in the afternoon for English, in seventh period, and we’re always the last class out. She packs a lot in each day, though.” She took a bite of the hamburger on her tray.

That reminded me of my own lunch. “So what are you forcing down my throat today?” I asked Michael in mock resignation.

He spread his hands over the trays. “Anything you like. Take your pick. And if you eat all this, I can always get more.”

I laughed. “As if! You’re just trying to cover up your own massive appetite. I’ll take some pizza, thanks.”

He handed the slice to me and also pushed over a bowl of salad. “Here’s your rabbit food, too.”

“Thank you.” I smiled up at him again. It was still such a new experience to have someone other than my parents who knew me, who cared about my wants and needs. I liked it.

Further down the table, Anne leaned back to see me around Michael. “Hey, Tasmyn. I keep meaning to ask you. Are you and Michael going to the Harvest Moon Dance?”

Taken completely by surprise, I wasn’t sure what to say. Michael hadn’t asked me, but I hadn’t thought about it either. I’d heard about it from Anne, who was on the committee planning the dance, and I had certainly seen the posters advertising it that lined the outdoor hallways and the cafeteria.

I was interested to notice a look that I couldn’t read in Anne’s eyes. It almost felt like a warning, and in the low buzz that occupied my head nearly constantly these days, I caught a few words: 
watch out…  wouldn’t trust that Cara too far… she seemed too chummy with Michael…
I frowned, looking more intently at Anne and wondering exactly what had made her so suspicious.

Michael glanced over at Anne but kept eating his fries. “We haven’t talked about it yet,” he answered her. Then he smiled at me directly and added, “But thanks for reminding me. I’d better ask her before someone else beats me to the punch.”

I laughed. “Yeah, because they’re lined up around the corner to ask me.”

He regarded me seriously. “You really have no idea. I am the only one standing between you and the possibility of a stampede of boys who’d happily take you to the dance.”

“Well, thanks for putting yourself at risk for me,” I said dryly.

I saw that Anne was watching Cara curiously during this exchange, and though I wondered what she saw, I purposely redirected my inner ear to Michael. I didn’t want to deliberately invade Anne’s private thoughts, and I was also reluctant to think too badly of Cara. Maybe Anne was jumping to conclusions. Cara
had
looked a little uncomfortable when she first spotted me, but maybe she had just felt funny that I had seen her laughing with Michael before I sat down. I didn’t worry about Michael at all; my trust in him was complete. And while Cara hadn’t given me any legitimate cause for concern, I appreciated Anne looking out for me.

As lunch neared its end, Michael and I headed out to our lockers as usual. I told Cara I’d see her in History, and she nodded, smiling.