Fear and Aggression (47 page)

“
No. This man tells us
that this is not so,” and Roloff, again indicating
Steve.

Seryen, again, looked at Steve. He did not
speak, but looked as though he wanted a further explanation. Steve
hesitated, and struggled to find the words in this alien tongue.
All three of the aliens were looking at him expectantly. “The deer
was given a drug to make it sleep. Aspiria was given a drug to take
her life. She was given it only moments ago. Her body has not yet
had time to cool. I am sorry, it is my fault. She is dead. I am so
sorry.” He felt sorrow—intense sorrow.

Roloff and Caryell nodded slowly. Seryen
continued to look in Steve’s direction, but was not looking at him.
His strange, irregularly placed eyes seemed to be staring off into
space. The silence became awkward. Roloff and Caryell were again
looking at Aspiria’s body. Steve’s sorrow, fear, and concern were
at first magnified. Then he began to feel some peace creep in,
slowly, but distinctly.

The expression on Seryen’s face began to
change. Brightness entered into his countenance, making his face
less hideous. Seryen looked down at Aspiria and then away again. He
turned toward Roloff, and then spoke quietly, so that only Roloff
could hear. Roloff listened intently, and at first showed no
expression on his face. After Seryen finished speaking, Roloff
looked out in front of him. He was clearly thinking. Caryell was
kneeling beside his mother’s body, holding her hand and crying
softly.

Roloff turned toward Seryen again, and
nodded slowly and softly. He spoke quietly to Caryell, and Caryell
looked up at his father. Then he arose to his feet, and backed a
little away from his mother’s body. The men bowed their heads and
closed their eyes. Roloff spoke reverently and slowly. It seemed to
Steve as if they were praying, and indeed they were. After a few
moments, Steve also closed his eyes and bowed his head. He could
not remember the last time that he had participated in a
prayer.

Roloff’s voice trailed off, and, after a few
moments, Steve reopened his eyes. He saw Seryen standing behind the
couch, behind Aspiria’s head, and saw him place his hands on her
head. Roloff joined him by his side, and place his hands upon her
head. Seryen looked over towards Roloff, and Roloff nodded. Seryen
spoke, with his eyes closed, so softly that Steve could only hear
the tone of his voice. It sounded so pleasant now. Steve’s feelings
were beginning to change towards this alien man. He was hardly
aware of his appearance now. The peace that he had begun to feel,
moments ago, was increasing and intensifying. He felt no fear. He
felt love—God’s love—and the room felt brighter.

Steve did not close his eyes. He looked over
at Caryell, and perceived brightness in his countenance. Caryell
did have his eyes closed and his head bowed. Steve looked again at
the men, and at the body of Aspiria. He was struck with how
beautiful and peaceful she looked. Where was the bruise on her
forehead? It had disappeared. Color began to come to her cheeks. He
looked up at the men, and they were still in the act of performing
this rite or ritual. He looked down again at Aspiria, her chest
heaved as though she had taken a breath. Steve was overcome by what
he saw. He felt weightless, an intense burning was in his chest,
and again shivers ran down his spine.

He saw the hands removed from her head, and
looked up at the men. They were now looking at Aspiria, and from
the look on their faces, they, too, could see the changes in her.
It seemed to last for minutes, though it was truly just a few
seconds that they all stood there, gazing at Aspiria.

“
Mother,” said Caryell
with relief and excitement in his voice. Aspiria’s eyes opened, and
she looked over at Caryell. She had never looked so beautiful in
her life. She smiled as she had never smiled before. Caryell ran
and embraced her. She did not lift up from the couch, but looked up
at her husband. Tears were in both of their eyes. They did not
speak, but continued to gaze at each other. Steve looked over at
Seryen, and could see that he, too, was overcome with emotion.
Caryell completed the embrace, and moved so that his father could
come to her.

“
I’ve missed you so much,”
she said gazing into her son’s eyes.

“
You’re alive,” whispered
Roloff in a broken voice. Her sweet smile again appeared on her
face. Roloff knelt beside her and embraced her with a gentle
intensity. The vision of this scene became blurry as Steve’s eyes
filled with tears. He wiped them away slowly, and tried to look on.
As their embrace ended, Roloff helped Aspiria to a sitting
position. He asked her if she was okay, and she acknowledged him
with a nod and a smile.

It was then, that she first observed Steve.
He felt sweetness and love as she looked at him, directly in his
eyes. “Thank you,” she whispered to him, in English.

A little more than five years had passed and
Steve was working outside of his home—the Palador’s home—on a hot
and humid summer evening. He had waited until after dinner to begin
his gardening precisely because it would be the only part of the
day that he could work outdoors in any degree of comfort. Steve was
an accepted part of the community, now. He had worked tirelessly to
help repair the damage done by the attack from earth. The
electrical systems were restored, the buildings repaired, and life
had returned to normal. Some families would never be able to be
back to normal again because of the lives that were lost. Still,
after some time even those families were making their way
again.

Steve felt that he was earning his keep
during these rebuilding years. He would return to the Palador’s
home late in the evening, or perhaps after a few days if his work
took him to the city. The Paladors treated him like family, and he
never felt out of place—at least he was not treated that way by
them. In reality, he always felt out of place. In some ways he
loved it. This was not earth, but in many ways he felt that it was
better. He loved the cleanliness, the cooperation, and the work
ethic with which the inhabitants of this planet (the people as he
would have said) were filled. Still, he missed the excitement, the
technology, and especially his brother. He missed the Space Force,
and his role as a Captain. There were many beautiful young women on
this planet, but, though friendly, never once did any show him any
romantic interest. He, too, felt no romantic interest towards any
of them. He learned to love the people, but not in that way. There
was no point. He felt something of this sort missing in his life,
and saw no hope of it ever being realized. He was an alien, and
these human-like people were not compatible with him. He never
thought of Tammy. He did not long for her, and in all reality he
had repressed any thought of her deeply beyond his
consciousness.

He had come here expecting to be imprisoned
or killed. Instead, he had been given his freedom, with which he
devoted everything he had to giving help to those who were injured
because of him. For a long while he expected the return of the
Space Force in one form or another. Perhaps they would return for
him, perhaps for Aspiria (or her body as they would have supposed),
or perhaps another attack. He hoped they might consider diplomatic
relations. For the first few days, maybe weeks, he worried and was
even paranoid. But as silence ensued, and eventually, as years past
he went from worry to concern—concern that they would never return;
that he would be forever stuck here. He was concerned about Mark,
and thought that they may never meet again.

Now, even these concerns had somewhat faded.
He was at home, and was very attached with Caryell and the Palador
family. He was resigned to being somewhat lonely, but not alone. To
living in a paradise of sorts, but always being a welcomed
stranger. He was resigned to living the life of a beloved alien.
His lot was what he had once given to Aspiria. Their roles were
reversed, except that he had chosen his lot, and she had had hers
forced upon her. Steve felt both blessed by his fortune, and
justified in his punishment. He was happy and relatively at peace
with himself and his circumstances.

Once the repair work was completed, he had
returned to live with the Paladors full time. He ate at their table
and slept in their home. He was given, and allowed to do, anything
he desired. After a week or two, he felt that he must make his own
way. Roloff and he discussed it, and Steve understood that it would
be better for him to stay with the Paladors than to live alone. But
what would he do. He helped Aspiria in her little vegetable garden
for a while, and then thought that he could turn it into something
more substantial. He could work the soil, and provide some of the
family’s food in this way. It was not necessary for the Paladors,
nor did they particularly want this, but it was necessary for
Steve. Roloff saw this at once, and gave Steve a large plot and any
support that Steve needed.

He now worked this garden with duty and
purpose. Steve knew deep inside that this was not necessary, but he
did not allow himself to ponder upon that. Caryell would sometimes
spend the day with Steve working the garden. At first Steve
objected—Steve was earning his keep—but with time it became a
chance to bond together; and Steve liked that. Caryell was not like
Mark, but he did partially fill a hole in Steve’s heart. On this
stifling day, Steve had spent his day in reading. He had learned to
both speak and now read this alien language quite well. He still
spoke in English with Aspiria, when they were alone. He spoke in
her tongue when anyone else was around. Both he and Aspiria enjoyed
their unique bilingual abilities. No one else had ever taken any
more than a passing interest in English.

After dinner, with the sun closer to the
horizon, Steve decided to do his gardening. Caryell and Roloff were
gone, and Aspiria was in the house attending to various chores.
Although cooler than at midday, the heat was still stifling and
sweat was dripping, almost gushing, from his forehead. He stopped
to wipe his brow, when he heard a man say, “Captain Jenners,” in
American English. Steve stopped and turned around. Two members of
the Space Force were standing about twenty yards in front of him.
One was fully hooded, and his face was not visible. The other, the
one who had spoken to him, had his helmet on but the shield up,
allowing him to speak. The voice was familiar, and the features
were as well, but Steve could not instantly place him.

Steve did not move from his position, and
neither did the men from the Space Force. They both looked at each
other for a few moments. Steve eventually broke the silence, “Are
you taking me back to earth?” He spoke in an assertive, unaffected
manner.

“
Only if that is what you
would like to do,” said the man in a friendly manner. Steve’s heart
was not racing, he felt physically calm. But mentally his state was
that of a firestorm. Did he want to return to earth? His life was
currently a paradisiacal prison. Would he be trading this in for a
true prison? What was earth like now? The men continued to stare at
each other in silence. The man in the black space suit spoke again,
“We’ve been instructed to either take you back, or leave you here,
but that we cannot stay for more than a few minutes. If you are
ready to return to earth, we need to leave now.”

Strange
, Steve thought,
I don’t seem to be
in much trouble. It could be a trick…get me to go easily and
cooperatively
. Even as these thoughts went
through his mind, he began to walk towards the house. He would not
leave without saying goodbye to Aspiria. Yes, he was going back
home to whatever it was that would await him. He still thought of
the two men as strangers, and was walking past them towards the
house. But as he got closer he caught a better look at the
visor-less man. “Danny,” he said almost joyously.

Danny smiled warmly, enjoying the
recognition. “Actually, it’s ‘Captain Wang’ now.”

“
Danny!” said Aspiria as
she came out of the house. Even her English had a sing-song quality
to it now. She ran right up to him and threw her arms around him.
The man with the visor turned to look at the event. After the
embrace Aspiria stepped back with her hands on her hips and her
face glowing. Danny was bright red.

“
It is wonderful to see
you, Aspiria,” said Danny in a forced attempted at his stoic
demeanor. It occurred to Steve that he did not seem shocked that
she was alive. Aspiria was in a brown and gold trimmed dress. Her
hair was a little longer now. Danny could perceive a slight ageing
to Aspiria, but all-in-all she looked better than she ever did in
captivity. She really was glowing in the evening sunlight. “We’ve
come to take Captain Jenners back to earth, if he desires that,” he
said turning back to Steve.

“
So you’re a Captain,
now,” Steve said proudly.

“
Yes, this is my first
mission. Since I know you, it was easy to get this mission.”
Turning back to Aspiria, “I am sorry that we cannot stay. I have
always hoped to spend time with you on your world. I’d love to try
some of your true homemade cooking.”

“
It’s everything that you
could imagine and more,” said Steve.

Aspiria was pleased, and then she looked
over at the other man. “I remember this disguise. How come you
still have your visor on?”

Danny looked at his companion. “He is
following orders—my orders. I told him to not take it off unless it
is necessary. He is plan B.” Steve looked at Danny and squinted in
a suspicious manner. “If you weren’t willing to come with me, I
thought that maybe you would be willing to come with him.” Steve
looked at the man with the visor, and Danny told him to lift his
visor.