Fashionably Dead (36 page)

“No,” Ethan said flatly.

“My Liege,” Venus hesitated, “may I have permission to speak candidly?”

“No.”

“Please, Sire,” Venus waited. Long moments passed.

“As you wish,” he replied wearily.

“She would want you to feed from her. She would not want you to die. She lov . . . ”

“Stop,” Ethan harshly commanded. “I will do nothing that will harm her. I’ve done enough to hurt her already. Do you understand me?” His tone was clipped and frightening.

“Yes, Sire,” Venus quietly replied and left the room.

She’s right Ethan
, I screamed inside my head.
She’s right. Please drink from me. I love you. If you die, even if my physical body lives, the most important part of my soul will die with you. Somebody please hear me.

I could feel his eyes on me, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t open mine to return his gaze. This was the worst possible prison. I could hear everyone . . . everything. I knew I was lying in a bed in a brightly lit room. I could feel their stares and I could do nothing. I couldn’t move or speak. I couldn’t respond to their touch. I couldn’t utter a sound and I had no clue how to get back to myself. I caught faint traces of his scent and I could tell he was fading quickly from this world. Goddamn it. I needed to wake up.

***

There were people in the room, touching me, poking me.

“Don’t hurt her,” Ethan rasped.

“We won’t, Sire,” an unfamiliar male voice said. “I’m afraid there’s little we can do for her. The Touch does not seem to be affecting her. We’ve never seen anything like this.”

“Vampyres shouldn’t be able to transport,” a female voice muttered disapprovingly.

Ethan’s voice was as cold as ice, and I felt the other Vampyre’s fear vibrate through the room. “You can do nothing?”

There was silence. They were no longer touching me.

“Get out,” Ethan roared.

I could feel him pacing, I could sense his anxiety and his weakening spirit. Why couldn’t he feel me? He was a mind reader for God’s sake. I used to have to force him to get out of my head. Nana said this wasn’t impossible, but I didn’t know what to do.

He gathered me into his arms. It was so warm and right. I knew his lips were on my forehead and I felt a dampness on my cheeks. Were those his tears? Oh God, please help me. Please. I smelled his blood as he slit his wrist and put it to my lips.

I tried so hard. I didn’t know what I did to get back to him, but it didn’t matter. I did it, and Ethan would be okay. I slowly reached up and pulled his lips to my neck. His body tensed. His beautiful eyes went green and his fangs descended. He smelled like Christmas and autumn air and life. I forced him into me. His fangs pierced me and ripped my skin like paper. My blood gushed into his mouth. His hands rediscovered my body and a ravenous hunger consumed me. He touched me, my face, my breasts, my hips, my stomach. I arched up against him, my body begged for more. Nothing had ever felt so good in my life. So right, so sweet, so hot, so delicious. I just kept swallowing and swallowing and swallowing . . .

Oh God, I hadn’t moved at all. I was still trapped inside my useless body. He wasn’t drinking my blood.

I was drinking his.

***

“Ethan this is madness.” Heathcliff was angry. The room was filled with emotion . . . sadness, anger, regret, love . . . and I was still an immobile waste.

“You don’t understand.” Ethan sounded broken.

“No, I don’t,” Heathcliff snapped. His frustration was evident. “But I do know she won’t want to live without you.”

“How do you know that?” Ethan demanded, his anger felt like an inferno in the room. “She told me I was a mistake,” he choked out.

God, I was an idiot. Why in the hell did I say that?
When I went for the jugular, I really went for the jugular.

“Clearly you have no concept of how women think.” Heathcliff stood his ground.

“And you do?”

“Better than you,” Heathcliff challenged. “She didn’t mean any of that. You rejected her. She spent her whole life being rejected by her mother. She was just protecting herself.”

“And that’s supposed to make me feel better . . . how?”

“I’m telling you she didn’t mean any of that. Women are unstable and prone to unreasonable emotional outbursts. They don’t mean half of the nonsense they say,” Heathcliff blustered.

Oh, he did not just say that.
My cousin or brother or uncle or whatever the hell Heathcliff was just took a dive off of the conversation cliff into the pit of he needed to get his ass kicked. Once I got out of my stupid coma, I was going to kick his ass into the next century. It was no wonder he didn’t have a girlfriend, dimples or no dimples.

“Do you know this for certain?” Ethan sounded doubtful. Was he buying that crap? Wait, I wanted him to buy that crap and drink from me. As much as I would never ever admit it, Heathcliff was kind of right, but I was still going to kick his butt until he couldn’t sit for a week.

“Yes,” Heathcliff insisted. “There is tons of literature on this. I’ve read it myself.”

“You do realize,” Ethan said slowly, “that you sound like an ass?”

“Yes,” Heathcliff sighed, embarrassed and defeated. “Yes, I do. I’m sorry . . . I just can’t let you die. So many people need you. Astrid needs you. I know in my soul that she loves you and will be devastated if you die.”

Go Heathcliff
! I cheered inside my head.
If you get him to drink, I’ll forget about all that male chauvinist bullshit you just spouted.
Ethan, please listen to him. Please. Bite me, bite me, bite me . . .

“Have you ever loved someone so much that your own existence is of little or no consequence?”

Heathcliff didn’t answer. Ethan went on.

“I have conquered countries, civilizations, species . . . worlds. I have riches beyond the imagination, and the respect and fear of hundreds of thousands. It means nothing.” Ethan’s voice was flat and growing weaker. “Until she became mine, I was alone. I have been without love for over five hundred years. Many times during those years I thought I was happy, but I didn’t really know what that meant until Astrid turned my world upside down. I never knew what it felt like to be whole. She made me feel alive, like a man . . . not some untouchable prince. And I fucked that up.”

“Astrid made the choice to transport with Cathy,” Heathcliff said.

“I know,” Ethan sighed. “I just can’t help but think the chain of events would have been completely different if I hadn’t been so stupid and shortsighted.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Heathcliff interjected. “Astrid is strong. Now that we know of the blood relation, there is no doubt in my mind that she would have done the same thing again.”

“Maybe, maybe not.” Ethan was unsure.

Oh for God’s sake. Ethan was an ass, an egotistical ass. He had some gall to think if we’d been all lovey-dovey that I wouldn’t have saved Cathy. Men were idiots. God, get me out of this coma so I can feed him and then slap him silly.

“Heathcliff, I have never been afraid of anything . . . ever. I’m afraid I will hurt her if I drink from her. I simply cannot take that chance. If . . . ” he paused. “No . . . when she wakes . . . if she still wants me, then and only then will I take from her.”

“I understand, my Prince,” Heathcliff sounded defeated. “I really do.”

***

“I couldn’t get him to leave,” The Kev told someone.

“What the fuck?” Pam shouted. “You are a two thousand year old Fairy and you can’t get a five hundred year old Vampyre that
you
trained to leave the room?”

Pam was pissed like I’d never heard. She also sounded . . . nervous?

“I don’t understand why it’s such a big deal,” Gemma yelled at Pam.

Gemma had certainly grown some big balls, yelling at Pam like that. Maybe the Fairy Queen thing comes with a fantastic right hook or a death wish that leads to yelling at an Angel.

“Oh my God.” Ethan was astonished.

“Shut. Up,” Pam ground out at him. “Don’t you say a word.”

“But . . . ” he sputtered.

“Not a fucking word,” she bellowed at him. “You are not supposed to be here. I gave specific instructions that no one was to be in here when I arrived.”

“Does he know you’re . . . ?” Ethan tried again.

“What part of ‘not a fucking word’ do you not understand?” Pam was not a happy camper. Why was she so angry at Ethan? “Do you want me to try to save her?” she demanded.

“Yes,” Ethan begged.

“Can you keep a secret?” She stared hard at him.

“If I have to,” he replied. “What are you?”

“I’m a fucking Angel with a foul mouth and a bad attitude. As much as I love you, and I do, I am not happy to see you right now. If you tell him anything about this, I will take you over my knee and beat your butt raw. I don’t care if you’re the ruler of the universe. Do you hear me, boy?” Pam shouted.

Was she talking to Ethan or was someone else in the room? Pam couldn’t possibly be speaking to Ethan like that. Could she?

Damn it, why couldn’t I wake up?

“Pam, calm down. Yelling at him will not help,” The Kev told her. “He is heartbroken and practically dead.”

“For God’s sake, Ethan, bite her,” Pam exploded. “I will not sit here and watch either one of you die. That would put me in a very bad mood. You don’t want to see me in a bad mood.”

“Holy crap, this is a good mood?” Gemma muttered under her breath. The Kev laughed.

“I heard that, you little wannabe Fairy Queen. Don’t you even think that I won’t kick your pretty little ass,” Pam growled and then refocused on Ethan. “You will drink from her. NOW.”

“I will not.” Ethan was cold and unmovable.

Come on, Pam. If anyone could scare someone into doing something, it was Pam. Clearly she knew him from somewhere. Maybe she and The Kev could physically force him. His bloodlust must be making him weak and needy. Shit, no one could force him to do anything. The Kev couldn’t even get him to leave the room.

“I tell you what, you are on my last nerve, young man,” Pam informed him.

“You said it would be complicated . . . ” Ethan said.

Pam cut him off, “I said complicated, not over before it got started. So buck up and shut up. I’ve got work to do.”

I felt Ethan relax for the first time in days. That made me happy. Magic began to fill the room. A warmth seeped into my toes and began to travel inch by inch up my body. The dull feeling of pins and needles started to pulse through my arms and legs, but I still couldn’t open my eyes or move my body.

“Astrid.” Pam was focused on me like a laser, “You have to fight. Come back, child.”

Oh shit
, Pam had called me Astrid instead of Assface or Asscrack. This was serious. I was trying and praying. I was making deals with God and Buddha and all the Saints. I even threw Santa in.

The Kev and Gemma began to chant in a language I didn’t understand. It was beautiful and melodic. I was floating into the music. It was misty and cloudy and a little ominous, but I knew I needed to be there. I was calling to them inside my head. Why couldn’t they hear me? Then the pain started. Oh God . . . bad, burning, vicious pain.

“Listen to me, Astrid.” I focused on Pam’s voice. The more they chanted, the more excruciating it got, ripping through me, like daggers dipped in fire.

“Do not retreat,” she ground out. “It will hurt like hell, but you have to walk through it.” Pam was pissed. “If you don’t walk through it, he will die and you will be stuck in this Limbo you’re in right now. I know you can hear me. Walk out. NOW.”

In my mind, I put one foot in front of the other and walked barefoot across the burning coals. I clutched the stone Nana had given me so tightly I felt it cutting into my hand. It began to heat up. I tried to drop it, but it had molded itself to my skin. My body began to shake and convulse.

“Hold her,” Pam yelled to Ethan. His strong arms engulfed me as I kept walking through the living hell inside my head.

It would be so much easier to just die. This was too hard. I could die and go back to Nana. Wait, Pam said I would be stuck here and Ethan would die. My life sucked right now. Oh God, I couldn’t move . . . hurt so bad. Please let me die . . .

“I love you, my Angel,” Ethan whispered in my ear. “Come back to me. I’m no good without you. I’ll make you so happy. I promise.”

Pam joined the chant. I could feel my body, my real body, jerking and spasming. Ethan held me tightly as Magic whipped through the room bouncing off the walls and creating sounds resembling thunder.

I was close. I was so close. I pulled my ravaged body up and dragged myself toward an opening. I couldn’t quite see it, but I knew it was there. My palms and knees were shredded from crawling through shards of jagged glass and I couldn’t stop shaking. It was only a few more feet. I loved him so much . . . I could do this. I had to do this.

I gasped and moaned. I was raw and cold, so very cold. Scents overwhelmed me and cocooned me in a safe blanket at the same time. I smelled The Kev, Gemma and Pam, but most importantly I could smell Ethan. My love and my life. The reason I fought so hard to come back.