Fan The Flames (Man Of The Month Book 3) (23 page)

Scarlett had thought she could handle this. She began to shake. Tears began to stream down her face. “I … I…”

Peggy patted her on the back. “I know. It’s going to be fine. He’s going to be fine. How’s that kitten?”

“Fine,” Scarlett said, but Peggy’s diversion failed. “What was he thinking?”

“They’re rescuers. It’s what they do. They saved the man’s life and Brad refused to leave Lewis. My husband took on too much. Thinks he’s Superman but he’s not. Luckily Brad was there.”

Scarlett trembled. “I thought I could do this.”

She had. Todd had been overseas. Out of sight was pretty much out of mind. That fact had made all his missions bearable. After that first year of marriage, she’d learned to stop worrying if his calls or Skype sessions came long after he’d promised. Something always came up. He’d always had an excuse and laughed away her fears.

“Come with me,” Peggy soothed and she guided Scarlett out into the hall. She gave her another hug and when they drew apart, she leaned in close to Scarlett. “Do you love that man in there?”

“My husband was military. He died in action. I was so angry with Brad the other day for something he did. Now it seems so stupid. I’m a horrible person. I cussed him when he didn’t come this morning like he promised.”

“Next time, you’ll be his emergency contact. I’ll tell Chris to make sure Brad gets it done.”

“No, his mother…”

“Is a lovely woman, but he loves you. I’ve heard all about you from Lewis. He says Brad talks about you all the time. Heck, he adopted a cat because of you and your daughter. Lewis said they really didn’t have to twist his arm much.” Peggy didn’t let go of the vise grips she had on Scarlett’s arms. “Do you love him?”

“Yes.” The word ripped from deep within. For Scarlett, when faced with the fact she could have lost Brad forever, realized the truth she’d been afraid to acknowledge. “But, I’m scared. How do I go through this again?”

“You just do if you love him. You could walk out of here and be in a car accident. The news is filled with stories of bad things that shouldn’t happen, but they do and they are simply senseless. We can live in fear or we can live each moment we have to the fullest. If you do that, you’ll always have enough days. You’ll never feel you ran out of time.”

“Scarlett?” Ellen stood in the doorway. “He’s awake and he’s asked for you. Why don’t you go in? I’m going to get some coffee. Find my husband. He hates these places.”

Peggy gave Scarlett one last smile and loosened her grip on Scarlett’s arms. “Remember what’s really important.”

She didn’t need to say the word for Scarlett to know it was love.

Scarlett followed Peggy back into the room and walked into the back section of the room. Brad’s eyes were open. “Hey.”

“Hi,” she said. She went over to him and dropped a kiss on his forehead.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get home.”

“That doesn’t matter right now. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“I must look like a mess.” He attempted a laugh. It came out as a cough.

“It’s like they put you in a papoose,” Scarlett said, describing the way his covers were tucked all around him.

“I’ll get you your letter once I get out of here.”

She shook her head. “It can wait.”

“I promised I would. I keep my promises.”

That’s how much he loved her, Scarlett realized. Even now he put her first. “Your health is more important than a letter. You are more important,” she repeated to drive the point home. “There are things we need to talk about, but not here. Not now.” Her eyes welled up with fresh tears.

“Don’t cry,” he told her. “Please don’t be sad.”

“Don’t scare me again,” she told him, wiping the tears away.

“Tell that to my doctor. He’s overdramatic. I’m fine.”

“Hardly,” Scarlett scoffed. “And you say I’m stubborn. Pot calling the kettle black.”

“Touché,” Brad said. He smiled wanly. “I’m not going anywhere. I promised Todd I’d take care of you.”

She wiped the last tears away. “How about you promise me that you’ll take care of me? Not Todd. Me. And then I’ll promise to do the same for you.”

He closed his eyes, still clearly exhausted. Took a breath. Opened them again. “I can do that. I’d like to do that.”

“The next time we talk, you’re going to do just that. Understand?” He nodded. “Good. Until then, you get better.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Brad whispered. “Now go home.”

“I’ll stay as long as I want,” Scarlett argued. “I love you and you’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

Brad tried to smile. “Always so stubborn. Then stay. But I’d rather you be with Colleen. And the faster you go, the faster I can get out of this place, because I want to be with you, and you won’t be here.”

“Such faulty logic. But I’ll concede. This time. Only because I love you.”

“My one win.”

“Yep. Don’t get used to it.” She leaned over and kissed his lips, the kiss light and tender and full of love. “You’ll stay in the house when you come home. Don’t even think of going upstairs to your apartment.”

He closed his eyes. “Yes, ma’am. See you soon.”

“Yes, you will, my love.”

As Scarlett strode from the room, Peggy gave her a thumbs-up. Scarlett ran into Ellen and Aaron on the way back toward the elevator. Ellen shifted a coffee cup and held out her hand. Scarlett took it and she squeezed it.

“Sorry to scare you earlier,” Ellen said. “You didn’t have to come all the way down here, but I’m glad you did. Kids. You know what they say. You never have an uneventful day ever again once you have them.”

“True,” Scarlett agreed. She could tell she and Ellen were going to be good friends.

“We’ll get to know each other better under better circumstances,” Ellen said. “I can tell you’re not going anywhere.”

Scarlett smiled and shook her head. “No, I’m not.”

Ellen nodded. “Good. You make him happy.”

“He makes me happy too. I’d stay, but he’s being too macho for his own good.”

Ellen sighed. “My son the hero. Always saving people.”

Scarlett reached her hand out and placed it on Ellen’s arm. Her next words came from her heart and were the absolute truth. “Well, don’t worry. I’m here now and I’m going to save him right back.”

*   *   *

Brad’s parents brought him home about an hour later. His dad had retrieved Brad’s SUV and his mom had followed in hers. Once they had Brad inside, his parents didn’t stay. They were in and out in less than five minutes. “We’ll keep his siblings away,” Ellen told Scarlett before she left. “I can buy you at least a day before they descend to check on him themselves.”

“You’ll get to meet everyone,” Brad grumbled. “Pain in the butt, all of them.”

“Someone’s crabby,” Scarlett said. “Let’s get you back to bed.”

He frowned. “I’m fine. I hate lying around. I’m not an invalid. I should have been treated and released.”

“Better safe than sorry,” Scarlett reinforced. “Upstairs with you and I’ll bring you some hot cocoa. I’ll even let you stay up and watch
Frozen
with Colleen. How can you resist that since you literally were frozen?”

Beaten, Brad sighed and shrugged out of his winter coat. A folded manila envelope fell onto the gray tile. His body was stiff, so she retrieved it. “What’s this?”

“Your letter is inside.”

The envelope was addressed to Brad at his parents’ Flora address. “I thought it was in your locker?”

“I moved it to my car at the start of my shift. Didn’t want to forget it. Luckily I did, given what happened.” He was still worse for wear—exhaustion etched into the new lines covering his face. He needed rest.

Her fingers held the thin envelope, assessing its heavy coarse texture. Then she tossed it unopened onto the center island. “This isn’t what’s important now. You are. Let’s go. Get upstairs.”

Proving how worn down the ordeal had made him, Brad went up the stairs without further argument. When she brought up the hot chocolate, complete with whipped cream, she found him cuddled together with Colleen under her favorite fuzzy throw blanket. On the screen, the character Elsa was singing “Let it Go.” Scarlett passed over the mugs. Knowing Colleen would immediately take a drink, Scarlett had added an ice cube to hers. “Yours is hot,” she told Brad. “Be careful.”

He nodded, and the group fell into an easy silence, disturbed only by Colleen’s occasional chatter as she pointed out something in the movie. After the movie ended, Scarlett put Colleen to bed. “Brad’s going to stay here,” she told her daughter. “He’s going to move into the house. Is that okay?”

“Yes,” Colleen enthused. “I love Brad.”

“I know you do.” Scarlett kissed her daughter on the forehead. Harry had curled up next to her and was already asleep. “Brad loves you too.”

“So will we be a family?” Colleen asked.

Scarlett turned off the light and the night light came on. “Yes, we will.”

“Good,” Colleen said, snuggling under the covers. “I like that idea.”

Scarlett returned to the living room, where Brad had spread out on the couch. He was fast asleep. She sighed. She’d meant for him to sleep in the bed with her. He wasn’t going to be comfortable if he stayed here. She shook his shoulder. “Brad.”

“Huh?” he asked.

“You’re not sleeping here on the couch.”

“No?” he grumbled, barely awake.

“No,” she repeated.

She helped him to his feet and led him into her bedroom. Their bedroom, she corrected. She wasn’t planning on letting him go ever again. Brad stripped down to his boxers and climbed into the queen-sized bed. They’d need to move his mattress in, Scarlett noted, so he fit better. “Do I need to get you up for work?”

“No,” he mumbled. “Don’t work until at least Friday. Have to get cleared by workman’s comp doc first. Appointment’s written on my dismissal paper.”

“Then get some rest,” she told him. “I’ll be back in a little bit after I clean up the hot cocoa cups.”

She leaned over him, watched as he closed his eyes. She turned off the bedside lamp, bathing the room in darkness. She stood, waiting until she heard the regular breathing that indicated he was asleep. Then she went back out to the living room and carried the dirty hot chocolate mugs to the kitchen. She put them in the dishwasher, along with the dinner dishes. The elephant in the room sat on the island, and she reached for the manila envelope. Her fingers fumbled with the metal clasp and she broke one of the metal prongs as she opened the flap.

Inside was a plain white number ten envelope. Todd had scrawled her name across the front. The envelope was the old kind—meaning Todd had had to lick the glue strip in order to seal it. She could tell no one had ever opened it.

She started to slide a shaking forefinger under the edge and then changed her mind and used a steak knife. Like the previous letters to Brad, Todd had written hers on loose-leaf paper. Unlike Brad’s, hers was still crisp and clean from only having been folded once.

She unfolded the trifold missive, took a deep breath, and sat on one of the counter stools. She could do this. She could read Todd’s final words to her.

My beloved Scarlett,
he began. She closed her eyes and set the paper down. Then she tilted her face heavenward so she could stare at the high white ceiling. She took a few deep breaths before lifting the paper again. There was nothing to be afraid of but fear itself, right?

My beloved Scarlett. If you’re reading this, first, it means that I’m no longer here. I’m sorry for putting you through that. No one plans to die, and no one plans to hurt anyone, especially the ones they love. I’m sorry for the pain and loss. I never meant to ever hurt you, ever. But if you are holding this, then it means Brad’s determined you’ve fallen in love again. Perhaps it’s selfish of me, especially because I probably haven’t been the best husband, more like an ass, really, but I wanted you to know that my final wish is that you are happy. That’s all I ever wanted for you. Maybe we were too young and too naïve to know any better, but that’s what made our love exciting, you know? I did love you very much. Do love you. You were my rock and I took you for granted. I hope whoever he is that he knows to never do that. You shouldn’t take one minute for granted. Not one. I made that mistake and I don’t want you to do the same. So don’t mourn for me but grasp—what is it, that gold ring? Hell, it doesn’t matter. Grab whatever it is, whoever it is, grab him with both hands and don’t let go.

Scarlett set the letter down, went to the roll of paper towels, grabbed one and blew her nose. She used another to wipe her tears. Oh, Todd. There was more, but Scarlett couldn’t read through the waterworks falling from her eyes. Tears dripped onto the white paper, but the aged ink long dried didn’t smear. She wiped her eyes again and continued.

I hope he’s a good husband to you. I’ve asked Brad to look out for you, so if he’s giving you this then he’s convinced that whoever you’ve chosen is the right person. He’s always cared for you, so I know I can trust him in this. He’s called me out every time I was a shit. I can trust him to be your champion and screen whoever comes around. Brad’s always had my back, and he won’t let anyone come around who’s not worthy. Call it my last act from the grave, but you and Colleen are too important to leave this thing fully to fate. I hope you’ll forgive me for meddling but understand why I had to do that. Last, I need you to do something for me. Brad didn’t reenlist. If I’m gone, he’s going to think it’s his fault. That’s just his way. He’ll blame himself. He’ll think he could have done something. Made it different. After my first tour, remember how we set up our estate? Seemed so premature and oh how we fought. But the fact is, like I told you, when your number’s up, it’s up. And if you’re holding this, then my ticket got punched and nothing could have stopped that bitch fate from claiming her prize. So make sure you forgive him, and maybe that will help him forgive himself. I’ve told him, but he’s not going to believe me.

At this point, Scarlett noticed there were a few watermarks on the paper not caused by her own tears. Todd had been crying himself as he wrote it. Her super tough Navy SEAL had shed tears.

I’m sure by now I’m rambling as I write this, but I’m sitting here contemplating that I’m dead, which is something none of us want to ever do, and trying to think of everything I want to say to you that I haven’t said over the years. How sorry I am when I hurt you. How you made me the happiest man in the world when you married me and how I could see heaven when you placed Colleen in my arms for the first time. I think I’ll miss her growing up the most, for every time I come home she’s changed. There’s nothing like being Daddy, you know? I owe that to you. You’re a fabulous mother. I know she’s in good hands. And you, my love, I’ll miss sitting on the beach with you and watching the sunset. That moment of orange and reds where the earth seems for a moment like it’s on fire. There’s nothing like California. Thank you for leaving me there but know that I am always with you in spirit. I have your back.