Family (16 page)

“No, Luke. Son, I’m being serious.”

They went another round, with Luke asking the same questions and John repeating himself. Elizabeth had gotten pregnant, and her parents had forced her to give the baby up. They’d planned to never tell anyone, to not even remind themselves, but then Elizabeth got sick and it became her dying wish, her final prayer”Dad,” Luke interrupted. The shock in his voice was undeniable. “Are you feeling okay? Can you hear yourself?” A choked bit of laughter rattled in his throat.

“Where’s all this coming from?”

And John would have to start again.

They went on that way for nearly fifteen minutes before Luke fell quiet. That was the moment John knew the truth was finally 125

sinking in. “You’re … you’re serious? I really have a brother out there?”

John was afraid Luke might come right out and ask if Dayne was his brother. The paparazzi certainly thought they looked enough alike. But God showed mercy on the moment, and the thought never seemed to occur to Luke. Instead he became resigned. “Well, yeah … I mean, I’d like to meet him too. He doesn’t belong to our family, but still … yeah, we could meet him. Whatever you want, Dad.”

It took another exhausting ten minutes before John could get Luke to express himself more, to admit that he’d need time to actually work through his feelings before he could say everything’that was clouding up his heart. “So you’ve …

you’ve been talking to him?”

“I have. He wants to know us.”

“But he already has a life, right? I mean, he’s in his midthirties.”

John could hear the insecurities between Luke’s words. “He does, but he’s known about us for a long time. He’s held off from making contact because he didn’t want to upset any of us.”

“Okay, so why the big push now? I mean … maybe we would’ve been better off to just let it go.”

“But Ashley knows, and she wants to meet him.” John held his breath and exhaled slowly. “I guess the situation just isn’t that easy.”

“I guess not.” He made a sound that suggested he was only barely catching his breath. “How are my sisters handling it?”

They talked about that for a while; then John tried again to explain the timing.

“We might have a meeting with him sooner than I’d planned. I needed you to hear everything from me before you found out some other way.” John stood and paced across the living room. The phone felt hot against his ear. “I Want to tell you everything, but some of this just has to wait.” He 126

wanted more than anything to be there with Luke, to put his hand on his shoulder and reassure him.

The others would be okay; they all would. But Luke was harder to read. Until this moment, he had seen himself as the only Baxter son. That much was clear by his almost harsh statement: “He doesn’t belong to our family.” As if maybe Luke needed to remind himself that no one could walk into their lives and overshadow his place, his relationship with John. Especially after the tough year he’d had after 9-11 when he closed off to all of them for so many months. John knew that there were times Luke still felt guilty about his decisions back then, and the last thing John wanted was for the news of an older brother to stir up the insecurities that still plagued Luke. Insecurities that he wasn’t good enough to be a Baxter or that he’d let them down in a way that could never really be forgiven.

The news could send Luke into a tailspin, and John could only pray that wouldn’t happen. “We’ll get through this, Son.” John found strength he didn’t have as he finished the call with Luke. “Can you agree with me about that?”

“Wow … I mean, Dad, I’m still dizzy over here. Pretty sure I won’t be sleeping much tonight.” Frustration added to the other emotions in his voice. “I need to talk to my sisters.”

“That’s a good idea.”

“Yeah.” He hesitated. “But we’ll be okay.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself. “We all will.” His tone softened. “I love you, Dad.”

Relief flooded John’s heart. “I love you too, Luke. More now than ever.”

The last call was to Ashley. By then John was shaking, his heart a mix of relief and regret, of wretched sorrow and dawning joy, and the strange sensation of a soul clear and clean for the first time since Elizabeth brought him the news that she was pregnant.

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She answered on the third ring. “Dad, I talked to Erin and Brooke and Kari.”

“So you know.”

“Yes.” She sounded nervous for him. “Are you okay?”

His eyes welled up. “Are they?”

“Of course.” She moaned. “Oh, Dad, I’m so glad you called them. You must need a hug in the worst way.”

“I think we all do.” He went to the window and stared out. The moon was full, and it splashed light across the field out front. “Tonight … those calls.

Next to giving him up, next to saying goodbye to your mother, this was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

“Kari said that. She said she hoped you believed her when she told you she forgave you.” Ashley’s words were like a healing balm. “They all forgive you.

You have to understand they’re still in shock, Dad. Kari even asked me if you were feeling well, if maybe this whole thing wasn’t a figment of your imagination.”

He would’ve laughed, but even now there was nothing remotely funny about the situation. “I think she thought I was losing my mind.”

“She did.” Compassion rang in Ashley’s voice. “I told her about the letter. I told all of them, except Luke. I’ll call him next.” She paused. “Dad … I feel so good about this. I think our brother’s about to make a decision that it’s okay, that meeting us wouldn’t be so bad. This way, well … we’re all ready.

There won’t be any big surprises from this point on.”

John pictured Dayne Matthews, America’s golden heartthrob, one of the most famous people across the globe. His son. As he thanked Ashley for pushing him to do what had felt even yesterday too impossible to consider, as he hung up the phone, as he got ready for bed and began an hour-long prayer asking the Lord to protect the hearts of his kids and to help them find peace with the shock they’d just received, as he tried to imagine

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what each of them might be thinking, he kept being tripped up by one very real thought.

Ashley was wrong. The surprise that still lay ahead was even bigger than any of them could’ve imagined.

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Dayne could feel Katy unwinding next to him.

After a twenty-minute drive north along the coast, he retrieved a slip of paper from his pocket and followed the directions into a private enclave of waterfront homes. Dayne made a series of quick turns, then pulled into the driveway of a small two-story Cape Cod, one that stood off to itself.

“Joe’s a genius.” Dayne peered out the windshield at the place, then gazed down the beach. The neighborhood was made up of only seven homes, and in the pink light from the sunset he could see no one out or about.

Katy looked at the house and then at him. “This is Joe’s?”

“No.” He chuckled. “He has a friend who vacations here in the summer.” He checked the street in both directions. “I guess most of these houses are only used part time. Otherwise it’s pretty deserted.”

“So-” she sounded excited and nervous at the same time- “we can hang out here?”

“I think I’ll stay here actually. I have my things in the back of the car. Joe set it all up.”

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A small laugh came from her throat. “And me?”

He grinned. “Don’t worry. I’ll take you back whenever you want to go.” He rolled down the window and killed the engine.

For a few seconds he breathed deep, letting the ocean air fill his lungs. “A beach home with no paparazzi. Maybe we’ve died and gone to heaven.”

This-time her giggle sounded more natural. “You have the keys?”

Dayne pulled them from his pocket. “The keys, the security code … Joe even had a caterer come in and stock the place. We could avoid the press here for days before anyone would find us.”

Katy’s expression looked doubtful. But her eyes told him she was too excited to be worried. “Let’s take a look.”

“Okay.” He glanced at the sky. “I want to get down to the beach while there’s still a little sunset left.”

They took their bags, walked up the steps to the front door and into the house.

The place was as quaint inside as it was outside. There was a great room with soft gray leather sofas and an alpaca rug. At one end of the room was a fireplace, and the wall that faced the ocean was all windows. The kitchen was small, with a nook and a table barely big enough for two. Neither of them walked down the hallway toward what must’ve been bedrooms.

Dayne set the keys and the directions on the kitchen counter and opened the patio door. Fresh air rushed in through the screen.

“This is amazing.” Katy stood at one of the floor-to-ceiling windows and stared at the ocean. “I can’t imagine having this view every day.”

“It’s strange.” Dayne was a few feet away, his eyes caught by the same sight. “I have this view, but I’m so busy running from photographers, darting in and out of my house that I hardly ever get to do this. Just stand at my window and enjoy it.”

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She slipped her hands into the pockets of her loose-fitting shorts. “A view like this makes me remember one of my favorite Scriptures.”

Dayne liked the feeling of being with her, loved the direction things were headed. No matter what Katy might’ve thought at hist, he didn’t bring her here for any reason other than to talk to share a little more of his heart with her-the only person he wanted to share it with. He leaned his shoulder into the window What s the verse?”

“I can’t remember exactly.” Her eyes narrowed, studying the shoreline. “The point of it is, because of the things God created people are without excuse when it comes to believing in Him If we tell ourselves there is no God, we lie to ourselves His creation is proof that He exists.”

“I read that the other day.” He felt his heart swell “It’s so true.” He held his hand out to her. “Come on. Take a walk with me.

She smiled and there it was again. The shy look that made him want to take her in his arms and protect her, keep her from any worldly harm or trouble all the days of her life.

She put her hand in his, and they went out the patio door and down a short flight of worn, wooden steps. Once they reached the sand, they kicked off their shoes and headed toward the water.

The sun was just dropping below the horizon, but the pinks and pale blues were still slow-dancing across the changing sky Gentle sounds came from the surf.

Dayne surveyed the area The beach was part of an mlet. The waves were much milder than hey were at Malibu Beach A trio of seagulls rang out in the distance taking turns diving at the water for fish. Otherwise the beach was empty.

They walked slowly, and Dayne felt his senses being filled by the moment. “Proof of God, for sure.”

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“Yes.” She stayed close to him, and once in a while her shoulder would touch his arm.

He forced himself to focus. The walk, the sunset, the feel of Katy close at his side-all of it was like Christmas morning. But he had more than idle chatter to share with her tonight. They were twenty yards down the beach, still on the warm sand, when he stopped. “Sit by me.”

“Here?” She looked around, anxious. Every time they’d been together they’d had to worry about whether they’d be caught on camera. Clearly she was still concerned about who might see them if they sat out in the open. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” He lowered himself. “No one knows we’re here, Katy.” He patted the spot beside him. “We’re safe.”

She sat down and faced the water. “I didn’t think we’d find this, not after how insane things have been.”

“Me either.” He looked at the fading colors in the sky. “But remember?” A cool breeze washed up from the shore. “I asked God that no matter how out of control life seemed this week, He would help us keep our eyes on Him.”

She smiled. “And here we are.”

“Exactly.” He took hold of her hand again. He had something serious to tell her, another step, a way of opening his entire heart, his whole life to the woman who had captured him from the first time he saw her. “Katy-” he turned just enough so he could see her face-“I want to talk about Luke Baxter.”

She lowered her brow. “I was going to ask you.” She searched his face. “Earlier when the two of you were talking I had the strangest feeling, like you were close friends.” She thought a moment. “There were other times too. Your eyes would change when someone brought up Luke’s name.”

Dayne drew a long breath. He had no doubts about telling her, no concerns. He trusted her completely. “There’s something I need to tell you, something I’ve wanted to tell you for a long time.”

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Fear toyed with the corners of her eyes but only for a moment. “About Luke Baxter?”

“Yes.” Now that he’d started he could hardly wait to finish. “I told you that I met my birth father a few weeks ago.”

“Right.” Katy’s throat sounded dry. She tucked her feet beneath her and kept her eyes on him.

“So, the part I’ve never told anyone is this.” He tightened his hold on her hand. “My birth father is John Baxter. Bloomington’s John Baxter.”

Katy’s eyes grew wide, and her lips parted. “Ashley’s dad?”

“Luke’s dad too.”

“So Luke’s your …”

“My brother.” Dayne shrugged. “Yes. I’ve known for almost two years.”

Darkness was falling over the beach, but he could still see the shock in her expression. “You haven’t told him?”

“Katy …” He allowed a single, sad-sounding laugh. “Luke doesn’t know his parents gave a baby up for adoption.”

She did a quiet gasp and covered her face with her fingers. For a few seconds she only sat that way, but then she lowered her hand. “So, who knows? And how did you find them-the Baxters?”

The story was long and complicated, but they had all night. Dayne squinted as the memories lined up in order. “I guess it all started in New York City when I was on location. I had to stop by my attorney’s office. That’s where I saw Luke for the first time.”

“Out of the blue, you mean? A total coincidence?”

“Right. Luke was clerking there between classes at law school.”