Falling - On the Banks of Lake Saint Clare (Falling - Book One) (33 page)

Mom looked down at the floor and then at Michael, anywhere but at me.
             
“What? Just tell me. I am pretty sure you can’t sugar coat it by the look on your face.”

Mom sighed, “She came over to tell us that Brad didn’t do it. She said he was with her the entire night. He even has debit card receipts at
The Lane
from when they were there. She said there was no way he could have because you even saw them there together. She said he talked to y
ou and even bought your dinner.”

“
What do you want me to say?” I asked. “She’s lying
.
”

She just looked at me.

“Mom? He did it. It was him. I remember everything.”

“I just want you to be sure. She sounded so convincing. He has a really good lawyer and I don’t want you to make a mistake.”

“And I am guessing Rachel’s father is going to help pay for this good lawyer?”

“How would I know that?” She asked.

“You
’ve been
married to him for 20 years.” I could feel my side grab and knew I needed a pill before too long, but I couldn’t stop. “You know him
,
and you know that that is just what he would do to win. He is so competitive that he will do anything beat me. And the only way he can win this time is to cheat. I can’t believe I am all alone in this. I can not believe you are going to let me do this alone.”

“I never said you were wrong. I just want to make sure.”

“It’s fine, Mom. Protect your real daughter from embarrassment. I really don’t care right now.”

I got up and started toward the door, and stopped, “You know what, Mom? It was Brad in the alley that attacked me, but you sitting here telling me that you don’t believe me is more painful than what he did to me.”

I walked out on the deck and sat down on the bench. I felt like I was dangling from a string that my dad and Rachel were holding high above the ea
rth just waiting to let me drop
, and
Rachel laughing at me as I h
u
ng on for dear life.
I held my side, feeling the shooting pain starting to get stronger.

“Alex,” Michael sighed, “you are not alone.”

“I can’t even cry, Michael. I don’t even know how to feel right now.”

My Mom walked out on the deck. Before she could say anything, I said, “I don’t want to talk about it. I understand your loyalty and it’s fine.”

“You are hearing what you want to hear, Alex. I never said I didn’t believe you. I just want you to be aware that not everyone will.”

“I don’t care what everyone else believes. It would be nice to know that my mother doesn’t have doubts. That she will be there unconditionally for me and I don’t have to second-guess if she will turn to the other side when it gets a little rocky. Maybe Dad is right. Maybe I do quit everything when things get a little bit out of my comfort zone. I tell you what, tell Rachel she won again. That I will say it wasn’t Brad and we can all forget that it happened.”

I could tell she had nothing to say. I even wondered if she was going to take me up on the offer.

“She is not dropping it,” Michael said, looking at my mom. “I will not let him get away with taking her away from me. It might have just been a week for you, but it felt like a lifetime for me. Every second I sat in that hospital looking at her was like an eternity waiting for her to give me a sign that she was going to be ok. He is going to pay for that time. He is going to pay for what he did to her physically, but more what he did to us emotionally.

“I don’t even understand how there is any question that he did it. She said she scratched his back so hard it drew blood. How is he explaining that?”

“Rachel said she did it. She was embarrassed to say anything because she didn’t want her father to know she was sexually active.”

“Are you kidding me?” I yelled, “She has been screwing Tony in your house for 2 years right under your nose. She has her birth control pills displayed on her nightstand. Those weren’t scars of her having a great night with her
boyfriend;
those are scars from someone fighting for her life. Have you even seen them? I made him bleed, Mom! I had his blood under my fingernails! How can you stand there and say she did it?”

“You don’t understand how overwhelming all this is to me,” she explained. “My life has become completely in shambles. I am not even sure that I have slept in days.”

“It’s not about you!
”
Michael said loudly. “It’s not about how confused tired or overwhelmed you are. Stop being so damn selfish and either be there for your daughter a hundred per cent or stop talking to her about it all together. Stop putting her on a guilt trip that you are tired and overwhelmed when she had no control over anything that has happened. You uproot her from her home without any warning and you didn’t want to be inconvenienced enough to tell her. Just surprise Alex, you moved. You didn’t go tell your husband that he is a worthless coward by putting a restraining order on her. How scared can he be of her? How can a man be such a loser that he does that to her and you just accept it?”

He leaned back and rubbed his eyes, “Oh man, Alex, it’s just not worth it.”

I started shaking and I couldn’t breathe. It felt like someone had a hold of my lungs and was squeezing the air from them. It’s too much for him. He’s leaving me. I leaned forward trying to catch my breath, feeling my sides shooting with pain. Feeling my heart being ripped apart and stomped on
.

“What’s going on?” Michael asked, sounding concerned.

“Nothing,” I could barely get the words out.

“Alex, what is wrong? Are you hurting?”

“You can leave. I’m fine.”

“What?” he asked, pulling me up. “What are you t
alking about? I’m not leaving.”

“You said it’s not worth it?” I said, trying to fight the pain.

“Oh gosh,” he said, pulling me in his arms, “Not you. Oh Alex, I didn’t mean you. I meant the arguing. You are worth everything. I am so sorry.
”

He looked up and saw my Mom standing there. “Can you please go get her a pain pill?”

“How could you ever think I meant you?”

I left the house without saying a word to my mom. I didn’t have anything to say and apparently she didn’t either. Michael and I took a few blankets and pillows down to the dock.
Kaitlyn
and Derek were in the same spot sitting very close together.

“Are we sleeping here?”
Kaitlyn
asked
,
while Michael and Derek spread out the blankets.

“Sure, it’s nice out here.”

“And your mom doesn’t mind?”

“There is a full moon. It’s almost like daylight out here. She can see everything from her bedroom. It’s fine.” I reassured her. I didn’t want to explain that I didn’t even care what my mom thought about it.

We laid there and talk until late unto the night, not once mentioning Brad, Rachel, or anything that might lead to talking about them. For the first time I feel asleep not thinking about Brad’s hands on my breast
s
or his eyes tearing into my soul. For the first
time, I fell asleep peacefully.

Chapter 20

The next morning
,
we woke up and headed to the cabin. “Where is everyone?” Michael asked, seeing the house was empty.

“I know my grandparents had a veteran’s reunion thing in Branson. Th
ey
left yesterday morning. I am sure Mom left a note on my bed where she went.

“I’ve got to get home,” he kissed me. “Do I need to pick you up for the game?”

“
Kaitlyn
needs to change and she can come back and pick me up. I guess I’ll have her run me to the clinic to get the stitches out. I have no clue when Mom will be home.”

“I can take you, if you need.”

“She won’t mind. You need to be ready for the game.”

I walked him to the door, “I’ll see you in a while. Miss me, ok?”

“Absolutely,” he said, kissing me. “You look really beautiful today
,
” he smiled, brushing the hair from my face. I instantly froze remembering Brad wiping away the hair from my face with his bloody hand. I shivered, trying to erase the thought. I was hoping he didn’t notice. “You are so romantic. I know I look like crap.”

“Maybe a little,” he winked. “Lock the doors. I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

I locked the front door, the garage door, and the patio door. I turned on every TV in the house, hating that it was empty and quiet.

I walked into my room and didn’t see a note from my mom. “Hum,” I said out loud, “Weird, Mom and I are note people. We always write notes.”

I looked at my phone to see if she texted me and didn’t see one. I started to feel uneasy and called her.

“Hey Honey,” she answered the phone.

“Where are you?” I asked.

“I had some things to do.”
             
“Why didn’t you leave me a note? I was worried.”

“Alex, I was in a hurry and you were still asleep. And I don’t want the sleepovers to become a regular thing
,
e
specially when you don’t ask.”

I didn’t say anything. I knew it would sound like I was angry and I didn’t want to hurt her feelings anymore.

“I guess since you took the car and I have no clue when you are getting home, I will have
Kaitlyn
take me to the doctor’s.”

“The doctors?”

“I am supposed to get my stitches out and get a refill.” I wanted to add that Rachel would have a limo waiting on her if it was her going, but I refrained. “I am going to the game after that so I won’t be home till late.”

“Alex, I don’t think a game is a good idea.”

“Why? It’s in
Anderson
so I won’t see anyone that has a restraining order on me
,
”
I said, knowing I might be sounding hateful.

“I think that for now the ball field should be off limits. That’s your father’s thing and I don’t want…” she stopped talking.

“You don’t want anyone talking about Dad? Is that what you are trying to say? I have not been out in public for two weeks. I am going to go to the game and I could care less what Dad’s loser friends think. I’m not missing the game. It’s the tournament, Mom. It’s the last week of baseball. That is my thing, too. You know I have spent my entire life at the ball park.”

“She better not be going,” I heard my Dad
say
in the background.

“Are you with Him?” I asked. “Are you discussing me with
H
im?”

“I had to come to the house and he was here. We were just talking.”

“Tell her it’s none of her fucking business that you are here.” He said, “Tell her. And tell her she will not go to the ball field or else.”

“I think it is best that you don’t go. At least for now. We can discuss it later.”

“What did you need at the house? I thought you got everything you needed the other night? Are you going back to him?”

“Alex, we will talk at the cabin. Do not go to the park.”

I hung up the phone.

It instantly rang.

“What!” I said, tired of fighting, knowing it was my mom calling me back.

“Wow, you sound mad.”

It was a guy’s voice, but not Michael.

“What’s going on?” He asked. “You okay?”

“Derek?”
             
“I can’t believe you think this is Derek. It feels like forever since we talked. I wanted to see how you were doing.”

“Who is this?” I asked, not recognizing the voice.

“I saw your Mom this morning, oh, wait, she’s not your Mom, my mom is. Gosh, I get so confused by that,” he laughed.

“You are not supposed to call me.”

“I know, but who will believe you? You are such a liar about everything that no one will believe a thing you say. Like the alley. How can you expect anyone to believe the little fairy tale that you dreamed up? I wanted to let you know that I told your real mom that I know you inside and out. That’s a pun, Alex. You smart enough to get it?
Inside and out?
I told her that once everything gets back to normal we can have holidays together. Your adopted family doesn’t want you anymore, so you are welcome to stay with us anytime. I can just see the whole family sitting around the dining table. I will say grace. Maybe something like, Lord, thank you for this food and for letting my slut sister come and join us. Even though she accused me of things I could never do, I forgive her. She can’t help that she’s a worthless whore. And even though the lowlife slut made permanent scars on my back, please forgive her. I did. Amen.

“You see Alex; I can be a really sweet guy if you just gave me a chance.”