Falling for Sarah (19 page)

Ethan blew out a puff of breath. “Sarah, I’m sorry about the other day, really sorry.”

She glanced at his profile. “It’s water under the bridge.”

He stopped, took her hand. “It’s not. I was way out of line,
way
out there. I said things—implied things that were so far off base…” He shook his head, tightened his grip against hers. “My assumptions were knee-jerk. There isn’t anyone I trust more than you. I want you to know that.”

Any residual hurt washed away with his words. Sarah touched his cheek. “Ethan—”

“You’re my best friend,” he interrupted, “and I think we’ve taken a wrong turn by trying to be something more.”

“Oh.” Her stomach sank and she dropped her hand away. This wasn’t how she’d anticipated their conversation going. The sharp slap of shock left her speechless. Although she’d been hurt and angry, she’d fully expected them to work things out and move along with their relationship. While she lay awake during the endless nights, staring at the ceiling of the guestroom, she’d found solace in thoughts of Ethan, of their night away, and she’d realized the extent of her want for him, her need for him. One argument didn’t have to be the end.

“I need you in my life,” he went on. “If the only way to keep you there is by going back to where we were before, I’m okay with that.”

“But—”

“Let’s leave it here, Sarah. It’s better like this.”

Confusion joined the gamut of her swirling emotions. Was this his polite way of telling her he wasn’t attracted to her after all? Unable to deal with anymore rollercoaster rides in her life, she reluctantly resolved to find peace with this new turn of events. “Then I’m okay with it too.” She was glad she wore her sunglasses, or he would’ve seen the lie.

Ethan pulled her into a hug, holding her tight against him. “I’ve missed us, Sarah. It’s been too long since we’ve been easy with each other.”

“Yeah, it has.”

This wasn’t what she wanted. Finding her courage, she eased back to tell him so, but he smiled at her, looking more relaxed than he had in days. This was what
he
wanted.

Ethan took her hand as they turned at the end of the street, starting back toward the house. As they approached the pale green cedar shingles and white trimmed porches of Hunter and Morgan’s charming home, Ethan stopped in front of the mailbox, pulling letters and junk mail free. They stepped inside, and Ethan handed Sarah the stack as he locked the door behind them.

Sarah leafed through the pile. “Lisa said she would be sending the swimsuit edition contract here.” Spotting Celebrity Magazine’s letterhead, she grabbed the envelope. “Here it is. I’ll be right back.” She walked upstairs to the room she and Kylee shared. Her brows furrowed as she studied the package, surprised by its light weight. The contract was usually an inch thick.

She tore the envelope open. As she pulled papers free, crisp, brown rose petals fell to the floor. She stared, confused, before it finally clicked.

Heart pounding, legs buckling, she sat on the edge of the bed, eyes locked on the mess. With trembling fingers, she picked up the newspaper clipping at the top of the small pile and looked down at a picture of herself. The shot had been taken the night of the break-in. She sat in the backseat of Ethan’s Rover as he drove away from her home. Hunter’s arm draped her shoulder. The caption read ‘Celebrity Favorite Under Attack’. Ethan and Hunter’s heads were colored over with dark red marker.

As she grabbed the next clipping, her breath came in shuddering gasps. Memories rushed back, bringing with them staggering pain. Tears stung her eyes as she read, ‘The Price of War’. She remembered the firestorm the photo had caused when a reporter froze her grief in a moment that would last forever.

She sat in a chair close to Jake’s draped casket. Hunter, in his dress blues and arm in a sling, rested his hand against her shoulder. Ethan flanked her left side, gripping her hand in his while he held her infant daughter in his free arm. She clutched the American flag folded tight in a triangle as tears drenched her face. The photographer had captured her agony for all of California to see. This clip had ‘Widow Whore Bitch’ scrawled across it in the same angry red.

The plain white backing of another photograph glared up at her. Unable to stop herself, Sarah picked it up, flipped it over. A long, keening moan escaped her throat as horror shuddered through her. Kylee’s smiling face stared back at her. It was a picture from the day they’d spent at the beach building sandcastles. ‘Isn’t she lovely?’ was followed by a vicious looking smiley face.
Not my baby. Not Kylee.

Pulsing with anger, Sarah rushed to her feet. Breath heaving, she threw the vulgar clippings and photograph, watching as they sailed to the floor. She fought the urge to clear off the dresser as helpless rage consumed her. Kylee’s picture landed face up and the fury vanished as quickly as it invaded.

Defeated, shattered, Sarah staggered back to the bed, collapsed against the mattress, fighting for each gulp of air. A tear fell, followed by another as a sob escaped her lips. Eyes wide, she covered her mouth with an unsteady hand, trying to hold the next back, but she couldn’t stop it.

Bright hot fear left her body shuddering as disgust curdled her stomach. She lay on the bed, burying her face against her pillow, and began to weep wildly.

“Lisa must’ve sent you two… Sarah?” The bedroom door closed and the mattress sagged when Ethan sat at her side. “Hey, hey, hey,” he said gently, pulling her up to sitting.

She wanted to say so many things, to tell him she was sick and terrified, but could only shake her head as he nestled her in his strong arms.

Ethan lay them down, his body cocooning hers as her sobs were lost against his chest. “I can’t… I can’t take this anymore.”

“Shh,” he whispered next to her ear as he stroked her hair.

“Oh, God, Ethan. He took pictures of Kylee,” she choked out.

He kissed her hair, bringing her closer.

“Not my baby. Not Kylee. I don’t know what to
do
. I don’t know how to make him go away. I want him to go the hell away.”

“I know. I know you do.”

She held on to him, absorbing the warmth of his body, finding comfort in his murmurs of reassurance.

Several minutes passed as Sarah cried herself dry, purging herself of the helpless grief that had threatened to suffocate her over the last few days. Weighty exhaustion slid into its place. She stared into Ethan’s gaze as her lids drooped. “He found me already,” she said sleepily.

“Yeah.”

“I have to get Kylee out of here. She’s not safe. He sent me stuff. It’s on the floor.”

“I saw. I’ll take care of it. We’re going to figure this out. Let’s talk about it in a little while.” He skimmed his thumb against her skin, drying her tears. “I know you’re upset. You have every right to be, but I want you to try to rest.”

She shook her head. “No. I’m fine.”

“Turn it off, Sarah. You need to sleep. Hunter has Kylee right now and I have you. Getting some rest will only make things better.”

Ethan’s gentle voice hypnotized, and Sarah’s eyes slid closed. She was in danger, her daughter was in danger, but she was drowning in a sea of fatigue. She struggled with her heavy lids. She’d hardly closed them in three days. When she fought them open, she looked into Ethan’s smoky gray pools.

The familiar scent of his aftershave and his big hands moving in gentle circles over her back brought comfort.

“Go to sleep, Sarah,” he whispered. “I won’t let you go.” He snuggled her closer as he brushed firm lips against her forehead.

She blinked once, twice more before her world went black.

Ethan brushed his fingers through Sarah’s soft hair as he stared into her tear-stained face. He fought to keep his body relaxed as fury raged. His capacity for violence was at peak.

Sarah’s breathing was just now steadying out after she’d cried as he’d only seen once before. If the fucker was lucky, the cops would find him before he did. The bastard was going to pay for every drop that had run down Sarah’s cheeks.

A light knock sounded at the door.

Ethan turned his head. “Yeah.”

Hunter peeked in, frowned. “Is everything—” He shoved the door wide as he walked to the mess on the floor. “What the fuck is this shit?”

“Keep it down,” Ethan said with a calm he didn’t feel. “She’s finally asleep.”

Hunter glanced at Sarah, then at the hardwood. “She found this?”

“She thought it was the contract for the swimsuit edition. She was almost hysterical, Phillips. I’m going to kill him.”

Hunter crouched down by the petals and paper. “Jesus, he’s been busy. The envelope is from Celebrity. He had to get into the newsroom to get this. And these newspaper clippings… The one about Jake is original print. He would’ve had to buy this from a collector.” Jaw clenched, Hunter stood, staring hard at the floor. “He’s not going to stop until he has her.”

Ethan cradled Sarah closer as fear mixed with the fury. “He’ll die first.”

Hunter met his gaze, held it. “I’ll get some gloves and get this out of here.” He left the room.

Sarah’s eyes flew open and stared into Ethan’s. He still held her close, his arm draped around her as she curled into him.

He smiled. “Welcome back.”

“Thanks.”

She tried to sit. “I need to get up.”

He held her in place. “Stay for a couple of minutes. You only slept for an hour.”

“That’s better than last night.” She hadn’t slept well since he held her like this at the resort.

Ethan skimmed his knuckles against her jaw. “You can’t keep this up, Sarah. You’re going to make yourself sick.”

“I can’t help it. I know Austin’s sleeping on the other side of the room, and Hunter’s just down the hall, but once the sun goes down, my imagination gets the better of me.” Her eyes darted to the window. “I feel like I’m being watched constantly, like he can see me, even though the curtains are closed.”

Ethan brushed her hair back from her cheek. “You have every right to be afraid, but we’re not going to let anything happen to you. That bastard can send you mail and leave flowers wherever the hell he wants, but he can’t get to you.” He tapped the tip of her nose. “Remember that when your imagination starts to take off.”

She smiled because she knew that’s what he needed. She’d known him too long to miss the anger brewing underneath the surface of his calm.

“I worry about you, about Austin and Hunter too. He scribbled over your faces with red marker. He wants to hurt you. Look what he did to that poor policeman.” She could still see the man’s swollen, disfigured face. “I called the hospital to find out how he is, but they won’t say anything.”

“My friend on the force said he’s been downgraded from critical care to serious condition. He’s going to need a couple of surgeries and some rehabilitation, but they expect him to make a full recovery.”

“Well, thank God for that. I feel responsible for his injuries.”

Ethan sat up, pulling her along with him. “You’re absolutely
not
. There’s only one person who is, and they’re going to catch him, Sarah.”

She fiddled with the edge of the covers, still edgy with nerves. “What am I going to do in the meantime? I need to do something besides worry, or I think I might go crazy.”

“Get back to work. Call Lisa and tell her you’re ready. I’ll be covering you and Kylee for the next two weeks while Austin’s busy and Morgan and Hunter are gone. We can get your stuff from the office and set it up at my house.”

Her gaze flew to his. “We’re not going back to my house?”

He shook his head. “The security’s better on my property. I set your home up to deal with burglars and typical, everyday threats. This situation goes way beyond that.”

Restless, Sarah moved to stand, but stopped when she remembered. She glanced down at the floor, bracing herself, expecting to see dried rose petals, pictures, and newsprint scrawled with red marker. “They’re gone.”

“Hunter came to check on you awhile ago. He took everything away. The police stopped by and picked it up.”

Sarah thought of Kylee’s photo, of her sweet, innocent face marred by evil. “I’m scared for Kylee, Ethan. I’m so scared for her.” It was time to ask the question she’d been avoiding. “Should I send her away with my parents until this is settled?” It broke her heart to think of being so far from Kylee, but her safety came first.